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Generation Nine grows up--will there be an heiress?
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Thelast)mewele,theGoodytwoshoes,thingshadtakenadecidedlyArthurianturn,withDinadanLocksofGoldilocks and the Nine Heirs addedtothefamily.
NobodyseemstohavegoAenanybrighter,however,asit’sseldomadvisabletohavesnowballfightsinthefamilygraveyardinyourjimjams.
~~~~~~
I’veaddedabitofentertainmenttothischapter.Sincewe’reinreversegenderPleasantview,you’llseealotofcrossgenderedMaxistownies.Seeifyoucanrecognizethem!
TheoldestoftheseknightlyliAleGoodytwoshoesarethetwins,Parsifal,onthele,,andGawaine,ontheright.Theyare,forthemostpart,verygoodfriends.
Theyarealsofiercecompe)torsinlearning‐‐
‐‐inarms‐‐
‐‐andingeneralchivalryandbravery.Gawaine:Hah!Iwasnotafraidofthatghost,Percy.ThatisbecauseIam
theeldest,andIamtheleader.You’realsotheonewiththeredghostsignoveryourhead.
Eggplantjuice?Parsifal:IdonotwishtofallbehindGawaineinmydedica)ontothefamily’s
honorandwell‐being.Or,moresimply,behindGawaine.Parsifal:Well...Yes.
TheirliAlebrother,Palomides,isbeinglookeda,erbythefamilyServo,Killick.
Killickwasalsomarriedtomyfi,hgenera)onheiress,Ruby,butthatwassolongagothatPenelopeneverevenmetRuby.
Andeventhoughhehasasaltyvocabulary,andeventhoughitisTalkLikeAPirateWeekend,KillickisabletotonethelanguagedownfortheliAleones.
Killick:‘Costherewerethisbear,see?Anhecomedoutthruth’brushan’thePresidentsays,“Iain’tgonnashootthisbearaccountofitbein’small,see?”An’thebearetthePresidentan’itlivedhappyevera,er.*
*Historically,thisisnotwhatactuallyhappened.
Killick:An’it’sbloody(*&%^*in’luckyforyou,m’lad,whichitisacceptabletouse*(&%^%&whateverwordsIliketofelinesacostheydon’tgorepea)n’it,see,oryouwouldn’gettalkedtohalfsomuch.
Smores:Rrrrow.
WithKillick,thetwocats,Dinadan,Penelope,andthethreeboys,it’simpossibletotryforamuch‐wantedliAlegirl.Andsogenera)onSevenheiressSophiamovesoutwithherhusband,theformerJackBuccaneerofthePira3cal Legacy,forapleasantearlyre)rement.
Andmaybenothingmuchhaschanged.PamelaWade:Youjuststrolledinasifyouowntheplace.Jack:Youres)ma)onisnoten)relyincorrect,asinpointoffactIdidownthisplaceand
liveintheadjoiningdomicile.IamsoassuredthatIamwelcomeatall)mesinmydaughter’sandson‐in‐law’sresidencethatIfeelitwouldbetroublesometoimposeanactualrequestontheiraAen)on.
Pamela:Oh.Isee.
DinadanismuchmoreinterestedintheopportunitytoTryForBaby.We’vemarriedinotherhusbandswhowereeagertoTryForBabybecause
myheiressesareonlyallowedtoTryForBabyanditistheonlyWooHootheyget.Dinadan,however,reallywantstheactualbaby.SixGrandchildren.Argh.
Congratula)ons!ThoughIs)lldon’tunderstandtheques)onmark.IntheSims,anyway,ifyouhavetoasktheques)on,youalreadyknowtheanswer.
We’regoingtotakeadvantageofPenelope’searlypregnancyrightnow.
‐‐andopenuptheicecreamparlor,RoseIceCream.ThisissimilartothestoremyheiressesraninOldPleasantview,butofcoursePenelopehastobuilditupagainfromscratch.
Isupposewedon’treallyhaveto,butit’scustomaryformyheiresstoownaLevelTenbusinessandforherhusbandtorunatleastonebusiness,thefamilytoystore.Andwemustmaintaintradi)on.
ThisbringsbackoldmemoriesofPenelope’sgreat‐grandmotherRubydoingexactlythesamething.
You’llno)ceshe’sbellowingalmostintotheearoftheSimDocNerdcallsJerkyJake,whohasmadethelifeofCassidyVe)narisomiserable.Here,heisemployedfull)mebytheicecreamstore.
I’llleaveittoyoutodecideifthat’safifngpunishment.
Ididnotunderstandthisreporteratall.Foronething,Ididn’trecognizeherasareporteratfirst.Foranother,shegaveRoseIceCreamtheBestoftheBestAwardANDanega)vereview.MaybeshehasaLife)meMovieChannelpsychologicalcondi)on.Wemayneverknow.
Penelope:Hmm. I think I recognize him.Recognizehim?Howabouttheblondtowniebackthere?
Penelope:Icecream,Mr.Legacina?Bigstupidexpensivepinkbear?
IanLegacina:Um,nothanks.Look,Idon’tlikebeingpressuredtodoanything.Life’stoughenough,youknow?JustletmelookattheicecreamandmaybeI’llbuysome,butreally,I’mheretoliveanicequietlifeandtobeletalone.
Ulysses,Penelope’sbrother,showsuptotosstheicecreamparlorafewstars,whichisalsotradi)onal—andniceofhim,consideringhecanonlyshopatnight.
YoumayrecognizeStanleyLegacyoftheVictorian Legacybehindhim.Canyouiden)fytheguyinthetracksuit?
Killickhasathanklesslife,soIthoughthedeservedatreatandabitoflove.Pamela:Whoosh.Cold.
Shedoeslookcold.Andonceagain,KillickhasfalleninlovewithaBVtownie,soyoucan’tsimplyinviteherover,oh,no,shehastostayforaminimumofthreedays.
MaybeI’lllethimdoitwhenthekidsaregrownup.
Ah,baby)me.Penelope:Bythefourth)me,therearen’tanysurprises.
Well,italwaysseemstomakeDinadanhappy.
He’scheering,hedoesn’tcareifit’saboyoragirl...Dinadan:Iwantsix!Ormore!
Penelope:Let’scallherElaine.Dinadan:Elaine.That’sbeau)ful.
I’mawfullypleasedthatyouhaveagirl,though,and‐‐Dinadan:Aboutthat,Professor.Um...yes?Dinadan:IwouldhavebeenhappyifElainehadbeenaboy,butjustpossiblyyou
mightnothavebeen.Infact,theremayhavebeensomeshenanigans.CouldIbribeyoutosayotherwise?Dinadan:I’munbribable,youknowthat.Butiftherewereanotherbaby,Imight
developaselec)vememory.
It’smorethan)metomeetsomeoftheotherneighborhoodchildrenandseesomebirthdays.
First,overatLyAon’shouse,hisgrandsonAlbertisabouttogrowup.BothoftheGoodytwoshoesboysandUlysses’daughterNausicaaareinvited.
YoumayrememberVictoria’shusbandAdrian,whodidthehonors.Itwasanicebreakfromgefnghim20BestFriends.
Albertlooksalotlikehismother,Victoria,andlikehisgrandmother,theSimselfRubyBlue.
Andofcourseitwasniceforhimtoplaywithhiscousins.
AlthoughGawainewasbusyelsewhere.
IkeeplookingatAlbertandthinkinghe’snamed“Stuart,”andthenIrememberStuartisinDicreasy’sVictorian Legacy,andthenIthinkI’vebecomecompletelylost.
AttheMidlock’s,liAleLenoreisthecenterofaAen)onforeverybody‐‐
Hervampireaun)eLucy‐‐
Herplantsimgrandfather,Appius‐‐
ButmostofallforhermotherCarmilla.
Carmillareallyisanaffec)onatemother.
Thoughsheisalsojustaffec)onate,period.Inpointoffact,shehasbeengoingforWooHoo20Sims,whichwouldbeimpossibleinthemainhouse.
Whilethelargegi,sofelectronicsaremuchappreciated,Iwishwehadthoughttoleavetheservicestaffforlast.Nowitisverydifficulttohaveanyoneoverwithout)ckingsomeoneoff.
SomeofMommy’sboyfriendsareclassactsandlikeplayingwithLenore,though.
LikeRhysFitzhugh.RhyscouldeasilyhavebeenLenore’sdaddy,ifthingshadgoneanotherway,soit’snicethathe’swillingtobeasortofstepdaddy.
(Note:thisdoesnotmakemeaRhysfangirl.)
HeractualdaddyisStanleyLegacy,andnowthatsheisolder,itisgefngharderandharderforCarmillatodateandnotupsetLenore.
InthelastRomanchapter,Marcusreferredtoafriendfromschoolwhohadtobele,behindsotheMariusfamilycouldgooffandgetMarcus’mommyanddaddyhitched.
Thatwasnotwhatitsoundedlike.
Thiswasthelast)meyousawhim—Bunthorne,thesonofHeatherHuffingtonandBarreAGoodytwoshoes.
BarreA’sfromtheextremelyaesthe)cbranchofthefamily,descendedfromCecilandLyAon’sbrotherDeBeersandtheSimselfMichelleFobbs,andfromhissonDanteGabriel,and
Oops.YouknowhowbaditmakesyoufeelwhenaSimgetsoldordiesbecauseyou
haven’tbeenpayingaAen)on.Well,it’smuchworsewhenit’saSimself.MichelleFobbs,theauthorofthePlanetary Apocalypse,gotdibsiesonDeBeersandhasbeeninmygameforatleastayearandahalf.ShewasplayingwiththebabywhenGrimcamecallingandBrutuscametotakethebabyfromher.
Thismakesmefeelevenworse,becauseDeBeershasalwaysbeenaquiet,shy,andaffec)onatehusband,devotedtohisartandtohisfamily,andhewaswrecked.
DGwasn’tmuchbeAerlosinghismother.
BarreAwasveryupset,too.
DeBeers:*snf*LyAon?Goodidea.Ican’tthinkofanyonebeAertocallthanyoursympathe)c
youngerbrotherLyAon.
Infact,theonlySimwhowaslargelyunaffectedwasthisyoungman.
Andthat’sprobablyasitshouldbe.HewasonlyababywhenGreatGrandmadied,eventhoughit’sprac)callythefirstthingheremembers.
It’saguy‐heavyhouse.Heatheristheonlyladytherenow.Althoughit’scompensatedforabitbythefactthatalltheguysareveryaesthe)c,artsy,andfashionableguys.
ItmustbeadmiAedthatGrandpaBrutusissloppyenoughtoburptheNa)onalAnthemandthinkitwashilarious,butontheotherhand,hewearsatogawithstyleandlovestoplaywithchildren.
AndthereisnoonebeAerthanGrandpaDGtoteachBunthornetotalk.Helovestotalkandtohearhimselftalk.Orbetalkedabout.We’llseeifthecharactertraitrubsoff.
DeBeers:Blowoutthecandlesonyourcake!
Bunthorne:Mycandles.Mycake.Mine.DeBeers:It’snotallyours!
Bunthorne:Mine.
Buthe’scute,isn’the?Sowhatifhe’smaxedplayfulandMean?Justdon’ttellBrutus,orhewillEncourageBunthornetobeNice.
Sonowthatyou’remettheotherchildreninthefamily,it’s)metogetbacktothemainhouse...
Forabirthdayparty.Oops.Io,endon’tno)cetheFearofaPartyun)lit’stoolate.
Palomides:Yay!I’mbig!Igettobeaknightnow!
Parsifal:Justonemoment,dearbrother.Ofcourseyouwouldliketobeaknight,butsuchanhonorisnottobehadfortheasking.
Palomides:Itisn’t?Parsifal:Indeedno.Onemustask—haveIthestrength?Thepurityofcharacter?
Thecustomcontent?Andalas,youdonothavethecustomcontent.Palomides:So...IfIcan’tbeaknight,whatcanIbe?
Palomides:ButIdon’twanna!Parsifal:Iamstoppingmyears,youngerbrother.Whatmustbe,mustbe.
Palomides:Oh,man.Thisissuckyanditsucks.
Gawaine:What’sthis?IthoughtPercyexplainedtoyouthatyoucan’tbeaknight.There’snotenoughCCforyouandsoyousimplyhavetobeadragon.
Palomides:Tough.
Gawaine:Don’tbeunreasonable.Youdon’tMATCH.Youcan’tbeaknightifyoudon’tmatch.
Palomides:Whosaidso?
Gawaine:Isaidso,andI’mtheoldestandI’mnameda,erthegreatestknightofArthur’scourt,sowhatIsaygoes.
Palomides:Well,I’maSaracenknight,soIcandresshowIwantto.AndIbetifyouaskedDaddyhewouldsayyouhavetotreatmejustthesameandthateverybodycanbeaknightornobodycanbeaknightatall.
Gawaine:Oh,allRIGHT.YoucanbeaKnight.Butfirstyouhavetogothroughaterrifyingordeal.
Percy:Why?Wedidn’thaveaterrifyingordeal.Knightshavetohavepurityofheartandbetruthfulandhaveasenseofjus)ceanditdoesn’tseemfairforPalomidestohaveanordealthat...
Gawaine:ShutUP,Percy.
Gawaine:Inthatcase...WelcometotheArmory,Palomides.
Palomides:Whoa.
Gawaine:DaddyletushaveitaslongaswepromisedtobegoodknightsandtohelpMomandElaine.
AndsoPalomides’trainingbeganrightaway.
Andsoonitwasasthoughhehadalwaysbeenthere—sleepingintheroomwithhisolderbrothers,trainingwiththem‐‐
GossipingabouttheircousinNausicaa—wait,thatdoesn’tseemverychivalrous.
Gawaine:I’mnotsayinganythingMEAN,I’msayingNausicaaiscomingovertoday.
Whichturnedouttobetrue.
Infact,allthecousinswereinvitedoveronthelastdayofGawaineandParsifal’schildhood.
Someofthem,includingBunthorne,hadalreadycomeoverasfriendsfromschoolandwerefriendsalready.
AlbertandParsifalwerealreadyverygoodfriendsandclosetobeingbestfriends.
Parsifal:It’sbecausehewearsthewhitelilyofablamelesslife.
Andthereisalwaysfishingtogetpeopletomakefriends.
JustareminderofwhattheGoodytwoshoesfishpondlookslike‐‐
This.
It’sonlyfunny‐‐
‐‐un)lsomebodycatchesaboot.
AndthenIletthemdosomethingmyGoodytwoshoeschildrennever,everhavebefore.
ItseemsoddthateveryGoodytwoshoeshusbandhastoearnaGoldToymakingbadge,andyetthechildrendon’tgettoplaywiththetoys.I’vebeenlooseningupabitandlefngthembekids.Andthisisthefirst)meanyonehasplayedwithaWaterWiggler,insteadofjustmakingthem.FirstitwasjustParsifalandAlbert‐‐
ThenGawaineandPalomidesjoinedin‐‐
ThenNausicaa‐‐
Andfinallytheyardwasfullofwet,laughingchildren.
A,eradaylikethat,someofthechildrenwerethebestoffriends.
Andtheywerecoldenoughtoneedsomecocoa,butveryhappy.Parsifal:Thatwasfun!Ibetnobodyelsehasthatmuchfuninthewater!
Notevenatthebeach!
Cecil:Perhaps.You?AlmosteveryonehasforgoAenaboutyou,Cecil.Whereareyou,
anyway?Cecil:Thatisimmaterial,Professor.CeciliaandIareonourtravelsforher
healthandallisgoingexceedinglywell.
Cecil:Irepeat:Allisgoingexceedinglywell.
Lucy:Geez,you’retense,Max.Whenyoudie,they’regoingtohavetoputonyourgrave“HerestandsMaxGoodytwoshoes.”
Max:Grandpapacalled.Hesaid“allisgoingexceedinglywell.”Ihavenoideawhat“allisgoingexceedinglywell”meansinhismind.IworryaboutMamaifherefusestoface—OW!
Lucy:Don’tbeacrybaby,Max,it’sgoodforyou.
MaxandLucy—andUlysses,andafewotherfamilymembers—wereinvitedtoGawaineandParsifal’sbirthday.
Gawaine:Iamtheoldest.Ihopethat’sevident.
Parsifal:Allright.Iwillwait.Youcangofirst.Gawaine:Alreadyam!
Gawaine:Alreadydid!
AndwhenthedusthadseAled,bothofthemhadrolledPopularity.
JackandSophiawereontheinvita)onlist,ofcourse,notthatJackrequiresaninvita)on.
Gawaine:Definitelyyes.
GawainerolledthewanttoBeTheLaw,whichisjustsohim,itbogglesmymind.
Parsifal,ontheotherhand—Parsifal:Iseenoreasonwhymystrengthandpurityofheartshouldnot
makemeanexcellentathlete.I’ms)llnotconvincedthatPopularityisrightforhim,butsincehealways
doeswhatGawainedoes,perhapsthediceknowbest.
Anda,eralltheexcitement,theboysre)redtotheArmory,andallwasasithadbeenbefore.
Also,nowthattheboysareover,theycanbeinvitedovertoUncleUlysses’housetogettoknowhimwhenheisawakeandstaythere)llallhours,hogginghishottubandbraggingabouttheirbirthdayparty.
Ulysses:Luckyme.
UlyssesislikehissisterPenelope—shy.Sohislifeismostlyabouthisjobandhischildren.HehastwoliAlealienkids.ThisisTelemachus.
He’sbeenabletoraiseTelemachusandtrainhiminhistoddlerskillsbytakingadvantageofirregulartoddersleephours.
It’sabittougherforchildren,butNausicaao,engetsupatfourorfiveinthemorning,sinceshehasaveryhighenergybed.Thensheandherdaddyareabletotalkandplaybeforehehastogotohiscoffinandshehastogotoschool.
NoneofthiswouldbepossiblewithoutUncleAchillesbeingaroundduringtheday,makingdinnerandrunningbathsandplayingPimpViking.
YoucanneverbequitesurethatUlyssesisn’tgoingtodosomethinghammer‐headedanddie,andyetheisn’thappyifhejustliesaround—well,under—thehouse.IlethimworktowardshissecondLTWfornogoodreasonotherthanitmadehimhappy.
TheGoodytwoshoescousinswereinvitedoverforNausicaaandTelemachus’birthdays,andNausicaabecameBestFriendswithPalomides‐‐
EventhoughheisameanliAlejerkandkeptclockingherwithbaseballs.
Gawaine’stoooldtoclockheranymorerightnow,buthe’snotaboveadmonishingher,whichI’msuregetsreallyold,reallyfast.
NomaAerhowpreAyheis,GawainealwayslooksasthoughheknowsbestbecauseheistheBestoftheKnights(he’stheoldest,remember?)
AndParsifaladmonishesbecausehehasthemoralpurityoften,andingeneraltheycanbothbecomealiAleirrita)ng.
IthinkwithGawaine,it’spartlyolder‐brothersyndrome.
Whichsome)mesisitsownpunishment.
Atlastit’ssundown,and)meforthebirthdayparty,andit’safullhouse,withJack(walkingawayfromthecamera)allthreeknightlyGoodytwoshoesboys,theTerrorTwins,Max,DocNerd,DonnaLothario,andafewothers.
Readytogrowup,Nausicaa?Nausicaa:Yep.
Nicelooking,butthedresshasgottogo.You’llno)cethatPenelopeandVictoria’syoungersisterReginawasinvited.
That’simportant,asReginaistheGoodygirlsplaceholderandit’snevertoosoontoworkongefngin.
Ulysses:Who’sthegirlinthebathingsuit?Don’tknow,justsomerandomtownie.Let’sletTelemachusblowouthis
candles.
Carmilla:Awesome!Whoo!DonnaLothario:Atleasta9.5!
AsyoucanseeTelemachusgrewupwell,andveryhappy.Andhisgrowingupisalmostimmediatelyupstaged.
EvidentlyDocNerdgot)redofwai)ngforUlyssestomakeamove,andshehasapoint.
ThismeansthatUlyssesisinloveforthefirst)meinhislife,sotherearenogive‐backs,Doc.
Sofar,shedoesn’tseemtomind.
Ulysses:Iworryabouttheimplica)onsofthis.Lucy:Hey!UlyssesisHOT!
Toolate,Lucy.
Ulysses:OK,um,Dad—Ihadn’texactlypreparedforthispossibility.I’vegottwokids,andI’mavampire—Ican’tofferareallynormallife,andyetmaybeIshouldaskhertomarryme.Maybethat’swhatsheexpects.Maybeshe’llbeupsetifIdon’torevenmoreupsetifIdo,or‐‐
Doc:‘Scuseme,gents,myearsareburning.
Jack:AsIwasabouttostatebeforethisyoungladymadeherappearance,perhapsitwouldbewisetoascertainherwishesinanopenendedmanner.
Ulysses:Um...?Jack:Askherwhatshewants.
DocNerd:Why,Iwouldliketobeawerewolf!Thanksforasking!
WhichIsupposeisKnowledgeSimfor“let’stakethisrela)onshipslowly.”
IthinkNausicaaisreallypreAy.Ijustwishshehadn’trolledPleasurewithanLTWof50DreamDates.Idon’tthinkitsuitsaPiscesSimwhohaszeroOutgoingpoints,fivePlayful,andtenNice,butwhatdoIknow.MaybeshejustneedstofindtherightSim.
It’stoosoontoknowwhatTelemachuswantstobewhenhegrowsup,buthe’sgotalessextremepersonalitythanhissister:Cancer,oneOutgoingpoint,sixPlayfulandeightnice.
AtanotherGoodytwoshoeshouse,LyAonisbondingwithhisgrandsonAlbert‐‐
‐‐AndAlbert’sfatherAdrianisworkingonthat20BestFriendLTW.HegotthreecrossgenderedMaxistowniesthis)me!Guesswhotheyare.
LegacySimsalsomaketheirappearance.
It’salwaysfuntofindoutwhatcareersimportedLegacySimshavegoneinto.ItlooksasthoughRhysisinthemilitary‐‐
AndApolloBohemianisinScience.IchangedhimintohisregularclothesusingInSim,orelseIwouldn’thaverecognizedhimatall.
Readytoputchildishthingsbehindyou,Albert?Albert:OK.
Albert:ButIwishyouwouldtellhimtogetoutoftheshot.Apollo:I’minurpartystealin’urfocus!
CarmillawasalsoinvitedandwasdelightedthatRhyswasthere.Albert:It’smybirthday?Anyone?
Noworries,Albert.Everyoneknowsthat.AlbertrolledPopularity,20BestFriends,likehisfather.WithbothGawaine
andParsifalalsoPopSims,acertainpictureisstar)ngtoemerge.
NowthatAlbertisgrownup,itseemedlikeagoodideatostartdoingsomefamilyportraits.Thereisonlyoneproblemwiththis—Is)nkatusingposeboxes.
Maybeasecondproblem—takingapictureinagroupcontainingthreePopSimsisfraughtwithdifficul)es.AnditwasextremelydifficulttoposeAdrian,inpar)cular‐‐
‐‐somuchsothatImayhavebecomea)nybitfrustrated.
Nevermind.Theymakeacharmingfamilygroup.
Overattheaesthe)chouse,HeatherachievedherLTWtoreachthetopoftheslackercareer,thusmakingitpossibleformetoignoreher.DGalsopulledareally,reallygoodchancecard.
DG:Whosaidthemilitarydidn’tsuitme?EvidentlytheSimsmilitarysuitsyoufine.
Bunthorne:Alas.
Sadly,BunthornemayhaveinheritedsomeofGrandpa’sspeechpaAerns,too.
Bunthorne:Well,howwouldyoureacttoamediocregrade?
Telemachuscameoverasafriendfromschool.Iloveseeinghowhappytheyaretomakefriends.
Bunthornestartledme,though,byrolling—notPop,norRomance,notevenKnowledgelikeGreat‐GrandpaDeBeers‐‐
Fortune.HallofFamer.He’ssloppyandmaxedPlayfulandreallymean,anditdoesn’treallyfitwiththeaesthe)candar)s)cheritageofhisfamily,butFortunemightworkforaSimwhoisgoingtoinheritanartgallery.
Bunthorne:Ifyouaregoingtocapitalizeonmyfeaturesbymakingacalendar,Iwillinsistongefngacut.
Carmillaiss)llgefngalongwellwithLenore,butit’sgefngtrickier.Infact,Lenoreonceno)cedthatMommywasonadatewithsomeoneotherthanDaddy,andstartedtocry.Isupposewhatworksforadultsdoesn’talwaysworksowellforkids.
Mrs.C:Thatisbecauseyouareanaughty,naughtyyoungwoman!Carmilla:Look,Mrs.C,Idon’twanttohavetoopenupacanofwhoopasson
you.
Carmilla:ButIwillifIhaveto.Mrs.Ccan’tleaveCarmillaalone.It’stheblowbackfromusingtheWishing
Welltoomuch.NormallyCarmillagetsalongwellwithmaleRomanceSims.
Naturally,Cassiushadtocomeover,introducehimself‐‐
‐‐andpickafight.Bythe)meIhadCarmillaaskhimtoleave,theywerebelow‐20andshehadtheop)onstoFightandBuyOffWith$50.
CanIstateagain,fortherecord,thatIhatethis?Idon’tcarethatthey’rehigh‐chemistryRomanceSims,Eaxis,theyHATEeachother.Cassiusisn’tevengoingtorememberthis,De,sodon’thatehimforit.ItookmostofmySquingehacksout,butImissLessRoman)cGreetandGoodbye.
Carmillahasbeenrestric)ngherda)ngtowhenLenoreisinbedorinschool,andbynow,Lenoreisbringinghomefriends.
Likethisone.Zane:Hey,Lenore,doyouhavetobesomean?Ijustwantedtobeyour
friend!
Lenore:Dothatagain.Believeme,Lenore,intheDevereaux LegacyZaneisalltoofamiliarwiththis
kindofthing,butIdon’treallythinkhemissesit.
Icouldbewrong,though.ZanegottonsofAspira)onpointsforalmosteverysingleinterac)on,includingtheonesinwhichLenorekickedhiminthehead.
Zane:Igottomakefriendswithameananddifficultgirl!YAY!
Lenore,infact,makesahabitofinvi)ngliAleboyshome,kickingthestuffingoutofthem‐‐
Andendingupwithanicebighug.
Finally,it’s)meforLenore’sbirthday.You’llno)ceDaddyStanleywasinvited,ofcourse,aswellasPenelope‐‐
AndUlysses,asalong)mefriendofthefamily.Ulysses:Iwasvampedinthisveryhouse!
Makeawish,Lenore,andgrowuptobe....
Family?That’sasoutofsyncwithherfamilyasFortuneisforBunthorne’s.There
haven’tbeenanyFamilySimsinLenore’sfamily,ever—justKnowledge,andrecentlymorePleasureandRomance.ShealsowantstoGraduateThreeChildrenFromCollege—howisshegoingtodothatandkeepupthefamily’ssupernaturaltradi)ons?
Ohwell,that’saworryforanotherday.Stanley:Ican’tbelievehowgrownupandpreAyyoulook!StanleymostlyhastheKomeifacetemplate,andCarmillahasBenLong’s,andthe
resultsAREpreAy,thanksverymuch.Mean,yes,butpreAy.
She’salsoquicklyinductedintothefamilyrockband,theCounselsofDespera)on.
Thefamilyissomeanthattheyareconstantlyspyingontheneighbors,andalltheslappingisaggrava)ngMor)ciaGoth’sarthri)s.Theonlywaytomakethemstopistohavethemplayinginstrumentswheneverthey’reawake.
PlusLenoremakesacutegirldrummer.
BackatLegacyMain,PenelopeisenjoyingherselfasonlyapregnantKnowledgeSimcan—wanderingthegroundslateatnight,lookingforghosts.
Fortunately,Dinadanisaverysuppor)vehusband.
Parsifalisquiteseriousaboutfeatsofarmsthesedays.
‐‐andthecoopera)verivalrybetweenthesetwohasnotwornoff.Parsifal:WhydoyouaskifIcheat,brother?Youknowmypurityofheart
doesnotallowit.Infact—Gawaine:‐‐youweregoingtosaythatI’mtheonewhocheats,onlysuchis
yourvirtuethatyouwouldneverdreamofsayingsuchathing,yeah.
Gawaine:Youknowourgoalistoprotectthefamily,especiallyoursister,onlysofarthere’snothingtodo.Sointhemean)me,thereisonequestIthinkweoughttocomplete.
Parsifal:ShouldweaskDadforPermissionToGoOut?
Gawaine:YouthinkrealknightsasktheirfathersforPermissiontogoonquests?Percy,seriously.
...probablyweshould.
Cashieryoumayrecognize:Areyouchafngmeup?Wereyouthinkingofaskingmeonadate?
Parsifal:Um...IthinkI’msworntochas)ty,yes,thatwouldbeit.
‐‐Oh,Parsifal,youfibber.BothheandGawainecheckedheroutanddidn’tlikehermuch,becausetheyhaveridiculousturnonslikecustomhairandhatsandfullfacemakeup,whicharegoingtogetchanged.Theymerelywentdowntownquietlytosettheirgenderpreferences‐‐
Andtobuycellphones,whichisprobablymoreinteres)ngtoPopSimsanyway.
DinadanalsobroughtGawaineandParsifaltoworkatthefamilytoystore.DinadanboughtTyke’sTowerToyssome)meago,mostlybecauseIwas)redofrunningInnerChildToysandGi,s.
PoorMor)mer.Allheeverdidwasfoundthesciencenerdbranchofthefamilyandsetupthelocalrobo)csstore.He’slivedaquietlifehereinWeivtnasaelp,andhecan’tleavethehousewithouthavingDinadanHardSellhimsomethinghedefinitelydoesn’twant.
EvenfarmoreruthlessSimsthanMor)mercan’tresistDinadannow.
ButthestarsalesmanisKillick.WriterTina:Idonotinanywaywishtopurchaseabear.Notasmallbear,
noralargebear,norastupidexpensiveGiantBear.Nobearsatall.
Killick:Whichyouwillbebuyin’a(&(^&*^&in’bear.WriterTina:Oooo.
Killick:Buya)(&(^&*^&in’bear.PurpleBunny:Yes!
Achilles:Wherearethebears?
IsuspectthatAchillesreallyfollowedthisfascina)ngspecimenofwomanhoodintotheshop.
Killick:WhichIisonlycallin’itanutcrackeracositcracksnutsan’nothingfunnyaboutit.
Flavius:Fascina)ng!
Youdidn’tunderstandthatatall,didyou?Flavius:Face)me!
Parsifal:Congratula)onsongefngalltheConnec)onsperks!That’stherealreasonDinadaninvitedthemdowntothebusiness.PopSims
especiallylovehavingtheHeadForNumbersperk.Theydidn’tgodowntotheicecreamshop,butPenelopemadeonelastrun
beforethebabycame.
Penelopehasmaintainedthetradi)onofsellingVeryExpensiveStupidPinkBears,mostlytosimselveslikeCandi(Chili Catastrophe.)
Penelope:Icecream,PurpleBunny!PurpleBunny:Oooo!
She’sreallybecomingoneofourbestcustomers.
Rhys:ThisisanewneighborhoodandIamNOTgoingtobuyicecreamandBigExpensiveStupidPinkBears.Irefuseto—
Penelope:BigExpensiveStupidPinkBear!
Rhys:YESS!‐‐dang.
There’sthatmysteriousblondtownieagain.Sheseemstoliketheicecreamstore,andshelooksveryfamiliar.
ZeeshanmaybeDocNerd’sJerkyJake,butherehe’sareallygoodemployee.Helovessellingpeoplestufftheydon’tneed.
Zeeshan:Cha‐CHING!
Thereportercamebackandwroteaposi)vereviewandgaveusasecondBestoftheBestAward.Maybeshehadhermemorymodified.Weputbothofthemonthewallandcustomersandemployeesalikewalkbythemandapprove.
However,whatwereallywantistogetthebusinesstoLevelTen.Onceyou’vedoneFiveTopBusinesses,oneoftwothingshappens—youhatethesightofabusiness,orit’sbecomeanaddic)onandyoucan’tstop.
Wemaybeabletowrapthisup.Penelope:Soooo,DocNerd.Iunderstandyou’reinlovewithmybrother.
DocNerd:Yeah.What’stheproblem?
Penelope:Oh,noproblem.It’sjustthatUlyssesisaliAle...slow?
Penelope:AndIneedONEMOREGOLDSTARandwe’llbeatLevelTenandIsweartoyouthatifyougivemeoneandIcangohomeandputmyswollenanklesupIwillcallUlyssesandtellhimtospeeduphisgame.
Penelope:Iknewwe’dunderstandeachother.
SoDocNerdwasthrilledtobuysomeicecreamorsomethingandgavePenelopethelastgoldstartoputthebusinessatLevelTen,andhereisthepicturetoproveit.
Penelope:So,Zeeshan,I’mgoinghomenowandI’dlikeyoutobemanagersoIdon’teverhavetocomeback.I’llbecallinginonceinawhiletocollectsomemoney,butotherwiseI’mleavingyouheretoworkalongweekwithlonghoursatpathe)cpay.Interested?
Zeeshanwasthrilled.
Zeeshan:Cha‐ching!
PenelopegotthebusinesstoLevelTenjustin)me.PregnantSimsdon’tlikerunningbusinessesmuch,sincetheyhavetothrowupandpeealot,butifthey’repermaplatandhaveaServolikeKillicktohelp,it’snottoobad.S)ll,Penelopereallywashappytoquit.OncesheearnedherGoldSalesBadge,shelostallinterestinthebusiness.
Thetwins’rivalrycon)nues.Parsifal:Itoppedmyteencareer!
Gawaine:Bigdeal,Ididminedaysago.
Apologiesforthecutawayshot.Penelopeappearstobegefng5,000Aspira)onpointsforEmptyingapoAy.Actually,it’sParsifaloffgefngascholarship.
Finally,theeventIhavebeenwai)ngforsolong—thebirthdayofthefirstGenera)onNinegirl.Withtherunofboyswe’vehad,Elainewillalmostcertainlybetheheiress,sowhatwillshebelike?
Penelope:She’sbeau)ful!ButI’msurewecandressherupabitbeAer.Oh,goodie—IfinallycanuseallthosepreAyliAlegirlclothes.
ElainelooksalotlikePenelope,asyou’llsee.She’salsoShy,likehermotherandUlysses,andlikeherfather:aSag,6/3/9/8/5.
ObviouslyPenelopefoundsomeofthosecuteliAlegirlclothesshe’dbeensavingup.
Dinadanlosesno)meinteachingherhowtowalk.
‐‐whichgivesthembothalotofaspira)onpoints.Thisishelpful,asDinadanwon’tbepermaplatforalong)meandheneedswhateverboostshecanget.
Elaine:Sigh.I’msobored.
Idon’tknowwhatshehastocomplainabout.Everyonewasthrilledwhenshewasborn.ThefamilywentnutsbuyingherpreAyclothesandredecora)nghernursery.
Elaine:SIGH.I’mlanguishinghereinmytower.NooneEVERpaysanyaAen)ontomeandI’mle,allALONE.
Neverhappens.EveryoneisfallingalloverthemselvestogiveElaineexactlywhatshewants.Daddyisconstantlycomingintoteachherhowtotalkorreadtoher.
Elaine:Sigh.Languishing.Gawaine:So,Princess,I’mtheoldest...
Elaine:Bored.
Gawaine:No,no,Princess,youdon’tgetit!PercyandPalomidesandI—andDadandMom—we’vewaitedforeverforyou.PercyandIaresworntoprotectyou.We’lldoanythingforyou.We’reyourvassals.Say“vassal.”
Elaine:Vassal.
Gawaine:Verygood!
Parsifal:IhopewhateverGawainesaidwasn’ttooshockingforyourpureliAleears,cherub.Butyou’reeverythingtous.I’veputeverythingasidetoprotectyouandmakeyouhappy.We’renothingwithoutyou.
Elaine:Bored.Lonely.Languishing.Entertainme?
Parsifal:I’m...notsogoodattheentertainmentbit.I’mmorethe“sworntodefendyoutothedeath”type.I’llgetPalomides.
PalomideswashappytocomeinasElaine’sjesterorminstrel.
ThoughI’mnotsureifthatwasashriekofdelightorashriekofterror.
Elaine:Love.Wantlove,Mr.KiAycat.Smores:Prowr.
Elaine:Wanttobeloved...
Thankyoutosomanypeople,especiallyeveryonewho’swaitedsopa)entlyforanupdate.ThankstoeveryonewhoseLegacySimsmadeanappearance:ToRubyBlue,Goldilocks and the Nine Heirs, DinadanLocksandherSimself;PurpleBunny, Pira3cal Legacy,JackBuccaneerandherSimself;DocNerd,Ve3nari Dualegacy,herSimself,againandagainandagain;Orikes,Pseudo Legacy,IanLegacina;Ben/Blite27,Ten Caesars,withoutwhomtherewouldbenoFlavius,noCassius,andnoRomans;Dicreasy,Victorian Legacy,StanleyLegacy;MichelleFobbs,Planetary Apocalypse,whosepresenceisgreatlymissed;Marina/Smoothiequeen,Villainous Apocalypse,RhysFitzhugh;Jamie/DocGirlP,Bohemian Legacy,ApolloBohemian;Peasant007,Devereaux Legacy, ZaneDevereaux;Walk‐onSimselves:WriterTina,Candi.Cover:GordonGrant,fromBoothTarkington’sPenrod.AndthankstoMarhis,whocreatedreversed‐genderPleasantview.Howmanycrossgenderedtownies
didYOUspot?
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