Bw05

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Mean Green Mother

From Outer Space

Ch 5

A Black Widow Challenge

Laitus, “I’m only going to ask you once: why are you out of your grave mid-day?”Abhijeet, “You killed me! I should scare you for that.”Laitus, “Big deal. Now get lost. I’ve got fish to eat and a special someone to invite back over and I don’t need ghosts causing trouble.”Abhijeet, “Ok, fine. Be that way.”

A short phone call later and Rodney Jung is at the door step.Rodney, “Who’s that guy?”Laitus, “Oh Abhijeet? Don’t worry about him. He’s just here to knock over my trash can again.”Abhijeet, “That’s right, dudette. Show you not to surf in waves you weren’t meant to.”

Laitus, “I’m going to be forward with you Rodney: I want you. I need you. I love you. Can you ask of those same things from me? Certainly and I will give them to you. But most importantly of all, ever since I saw you. Well, ok, this sounds creepy, but I just want to have your child. Is that too much to ask? That you’ll bed with me in the chance of a child.” I still don’t know how I strike up the nerve to say such things.Rodney, “Oh baby, I’d bed with a beautiful woman like you for any reason.”

Laitus, “If that is how your heart dances to the beat, then maybe you’ll also accept my proposal for marriage?”Rodney, “Really, Wow, this is going so fast and… we just met.”Laitus, “But the attraction is there, is it not? Could this perhaps be fate? Trust in your feelings, Rodney.”Rodney, “Oh, alright. I accept then.”

Laitus, “Errr, well, might as well tie the knot right now.”Rodney, “Really? Shouldn’t there be a ceremony?”Laitus, “I’m not really into the formal stuff. Just a simple ring exchange will do for me.”Rodney, “What about witnesses?”Laitus, “Plenty that you don’t even realize.”Rodney, “Very well. I take this ring that somehow popped into my pocket and shall take you as my wife.”

Laitus, “And here comes number five.”Rodney, “What’s that about five?”Laitus, “Just keeping tally of some silly mind game I play in my head.”

Laitus, “Whew. To think I have to do this with at least five other guys. I just hope conceiving a child will be as easy as the last three. Well, maybe it could use some work if I really like the guy. But then… *sigh* Can’t get too attached. Don’t want to be struck by that nasty fear of not wanting them dead. That’s the whole point in marrying them.”

Laitus, “Still in your underwear I see.”Rodney, “Just hadn’t changed yet is all.”Laitus, God I hope I don’t fear the death of Rodney. Maybe I just need to sleep it over. That’s it. A nice snooze should make sure that I’ve made up my mind on whether I see him gone sooner or later.

One thing is certain though and that is Rodney has worked well in helping a child start it’s journey.

Dear Diary,A lot has happened since I’ve written in you. First off I met this really pretty lady. And then we got married. And then we made woo hoo. She tells me she’s having my baby! I don’t know what to think. At least I will have an heir.

She also has a nice TV.Rodney Jung Stats:Moved in with $70004/7/8/3/3 personalityFortune LTW Chief of StaffTurn On Underwear, Cooks / Off Custom Hair

Rodney, “Gee, there certainly are a lot of graves out here.”

As the morning sun rises over the horizon, Laitus does make a call of judgment.Laitus, “It’s cool. Rodney can die.”

Poor Rodney… They say while pulling weeds he offended the fictional weed eating beetle that supposedly eats all the weeds on a property lot. Instead, they ate Rodney leaving behind a pile of ashes and a floating wedding band.

Grim, “Well this is a change, normally the wife is standing close by when I come to take the body. She must not have liked this guy in the least.”

Though honestly, she was busy doing other things.

Oh but how hard Laitus cried. Of all the husbands before she may have shed a bout of tears once, but Rodney. Rodney is the first to receive such grieving.

Laitus, “Oh, hello again Wolfgang. Yes, another husband has died through some mysterious circumstances. Oh, yes I will be collecting on the life insurance policy. How did he die? Oh some weed eating beetles were angry that he was plucking away their food supply.”

Make your own caption.

Laitus, “Guess whose birthday it is, little Lucy. That’s right, it’s yours!”

And here is Lucy all toddler-ified. And her first act as a toddler is to go to the bathroom in Laitus’ arms.Personality stats of 7/6/1/10/6The first child to have a bounty of nice points instead of none at all. Whoo!

Cooper, “Boo hoo, I can’t believe I fell for this trap. And now I’m a ghost for all time.”Cooper’s not a bad ghost. Sure he haunts, but… no scaring anyone at all.

Laitus, “You have a bunny speaking toy and a teddy bear and you choose to cause the trouble with the toilet. Whatever am I going to do with you?”

Yes, I am just a touch shocked that Laitus is furious with Lucy. Not entirely sure what caused this to happen in the first place. The only thing that comes to mind is when the toddler wet the diaper while in Laitus’ arms. I don’t see how playing in the toilet could have caused it.

Laitus, “As many kids as I’ve already had and all the ones I know I’ll have in the future, I’m surprised that the first baby bump still surprises me.”

Laitus, “Lucy, you’re going to be special. Of all the kids I’ve had so far, you’ll be the first I’ll teach how to talk. It was very difficult to squeeze in the time between all the other events, but not this time.”

Laitus, “This time, you’ll be the on to learn how to say mama.”

Lucy, “Mama?”Laitus, “Yes, very good! You’re a fast learner.”

Laitus, “Hello, Ti-Ning. No I can’t go out on an outing with you. I’d need to hire a nanny first and you’ll probably scold me for being late for the event. Maybe we could see each other some other time though?”

Just a moment of joy as both family members enjoy sometime at play. Laitus enjoys a game of pinball (gaming being her ideal hobby) whilst Lucy finally discovers the teddy bear.

Ah ha! Caught Abhijeet in the act.

Good thing Laitus can afford to get rid of those roaches through hired help with all the life insurance she’s claimed. No need for bad VERMIN! Memories when perfectly good exterminator can have them instead.

To make the pregnancies go by much easier (hopefully) an espresso machine is purchased. With so much time starting to feel wasted getting in and out of bed at the beck and call of kids… liquid energy seems to be the way to go.

Lucy, “Mama!”Laitus, “Very good. Now try another word.”Lucy, “Ghost!”Laitus, “No ghosts in here though.”Looks like Weylon has come to see the fruit of his loins. Hope he’s happy to see little Lucy.

Meanwhile , Laitus screams bloody murder as the next child is born. However, for some odd reason I can’t seem to find any photos of the baby being born for this update. Guess we’ll have to wait til next time.

Score45 points from the last update+5 points for the wedding+5 points for Rodney’s death+2 points for the proposal accepted+2 for the pregnancy+1 for Lucy growing up well -------------------------------------------------60 points!

Jeannie, “Mr. Roseland, today is a special day for me not you. So get off the phone and watch me grow up. And could you please put on some clothes. It’s embarrassing enough as it is.”

Jeannie, “I wish… I wish to be able to call Mr. Roseland Cyd just to spite him as a teenager.”

And lo, Jeannie grows into a wonderful looking teenager. She rolls popularity and with a LTW of being The Law. Why do I sense trouble with that. Teenager wanting to be in control of the societal laws?Turn on: Hard Working, JoblessOff: Charisma

Cyd, “Where are you going, little miss?”Jeannie, “Little miss? Excuse me, Cyd, but I’m off to spend my birthday money. I’m not going to sit around and pounce about in these horrible looking clothes. They’re incredibly itchy against my skin.”

And off Jeannie goes to the wonderful store of Cold Issue Clothing, the most happening clothes store in all of the downtown area it seems.

Jeannie, “First things first: any good teenager nowadays just has to have a cell phone. How else am I going to call up Chuck or Jerry with that doofus on the phone all the time.”

Jeannie, “And now it’s time to try on something more appealing.”

Jeannie, “Look out world, because here I come.”