Working with Military Families

04/10/2023 1

WORKING WITH MILITARY CHILDREN

AND FAMILIES2013 SC Children’s Trust Fund Prevention

Conference

Prevention Conference System Wide Solutions, Inc. 2013

04/10/2023Prevention Conference System Wide Solutions, Inc. 2013

Purposes Who are veterans, career military and their

children and families Who you are most likely to see Mental models that influence our decisions Most important influences of the military life

on children and families Some of the results of the military life on

children and families

WHAT WILL COVER

To provide an overview of the cultural and social influences on military children and families that are different from civilian influences

To provide a framework into which to fit your existing knowledge

To provide information based on empirical and observational evidence rather than institutional and legal constructs

PURPOSES

Who are veterans, career military and their children and

families?

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Wide Solutions, Inc. 2013 6

SERVICE BY GENERATION

00.10.20.30.40.50.60.7

X’rs

GENERATION

Milita

5000000

10000000

15000000

20000000

25000000

THE VETERAN POPULATION

VETERAN POPULATION COMPARISONS

Total Veterans

Post 9/11 Only

Pre/Post 9/11

Active Duty

Res/NG0

5000000

10000000

15000000

20000000

25000000

NON-CAREER VETERANS Served on active duty and chose not to be,

or were not allowed to be, career military

Veterans average 64 years of age in US

The number gets fewer and the average age gets a little higher every year

CATEGORIES OF MILITARY FAMILIES

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Retire

NG/Res

t BRAT

2,000,000

4,000,000

6,000,000

8,000,000

10,000,000

12,000,000

14,000,000

16,000,000

Retired Active Duty Reserve/NG Total 0

2000000

4000000

6000000

8000000

10000000

12000000

14000000

16000000

18000000

20000000

CHILDREN BY COMPONENT

All Single Parents Women Single Parents 0%

ACTIVE DUTY SINGLE PARENTS

All Dual MiIitary Spouse Women Dual Military Spouse 0%

ACTIVE DUTY DUAL MILITARY SPOUSE

Career Military w/Families Non-Career Military w/Families0%

ACTIVE DUTY MEMBERS WITH FAMILIESCAREER VS NON-CAREEER

Ten times as many veterans served before 9/11 than after 9/11

Most veterans are older individuals with largest proportion from Vietnam Era

There are almost four times as many retired career personnel than active duty career personnel

If you are working with children, you are most likely to see the children of active duty personnel, younger retired personnel and recent veterans.

Women in the military with children are more likely to have less support than men.

CONCLUSIONS

Mental models that influence our decisions

04/10/2023 17

War and combat are the root cause of problems among military and military families/BRATS

The US Military is a microcosm of the US itself

culturally, socially and demographically

Veterans and Regular Military Professionals are pretty much the same

COMMON MENTAL MODELS

Deployed in Support

On Ground

Contact with Enemy

Combat MOS

0 1,000,000 2,000,000 3,000,000

PERSONNEL ENGAGED IN OVERSEAS CONTINGENCY OPERATIONS (GWT)

Overall veteran rate up 10% since 1999

Overall civilian rate up 31% since 1999

Mean age of veteran suicide is 55

Veterans under 30 have lower suicide rate than non-veterans under 30

Among post-9/11 veterans who suicide, 53% had not deployed and 85% were not in combat

EXAMPLE OF MISUNDERSTANDINGS: SUICIDES AMONG MILITARY VETERANS

Younger than US population as a whole Better paid than US workers as a whole More likely to be from rural areas or small

towns More likely to be from the South More likely to be white, non-Hispanic More likely to be married with children More likely to identify self as conservative Much more likely to come from a military

family

DEMOGRAPHICS OF US MILITARY

DIFFERENT PERCEPTIONS

Career Military view Civilian view

To the career military and their families military service never ends even after retirement.

The DoD and the military branch is the provider of services and what one identifies with.

To the public and the non-career person who served and their families, military service has an end point.

The VA is where one goes to receive help after separation or discharge

George A. Appenzeller

George W. Appenzeller

George N. Appenzeller

Lauren Appenzeller

George Forest Appenzeller

Katherine Appenzeller

Matthew N. Appenzeller

Gail Appenzeller Riddle

Tony Appenzeller

Peggy A. Martin

Forest P. Newman, Jr.

Susan Newman Appenzeller

Forest P. Newman III

Roger Newman

Mark Newman

4 generations4 career military1 veteran11 military BRATs

Combat doesn’t appear to be the most important factor in the effects of military service on most individuals who serve and their children and families

People who have served in the military since the All-Volunteer Force was instituted are not representative of the general population

Career military and non-career veterans are different from one another in a number of important ways

CONCLUSIONS

Most important influences of the military life

on members and families

04/10/2023

To maintain civilian control

To control the violence implicit and explicit in military service

To make what in civilian life is aberrational become aspirational

To normalize what would in civilian life be unacceptable social and work conditions

Military Life and its Families System Wide Solutions, Inc. 2013 25

PURPOSES OF US MILITARY CULTURE

BASICS OF US MILITARY CULTURE

Limited rights and different laws- Title 10 US Code of Laws

Can-do optimism

Limited candor

04/10/2023

Amoral

Authoritarian

Obedience expected and demanded

Accountable only to the chain of command

Loyalty, duty and honor highly valued

Aggression highly valued

History and tradition honored

Only minimal casualties acceptable

Social interactions based on caste system

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Social dependency through all-encompassing system of care

Nationalistic

Priorities are:◦ mission

institution career

fellow members and retired members families

04/10/2023Military Life and its Families System Wide Solutions, Inc. 2013

Civilian culture values individual freedom - military culture must limit freedom

Civilian culture values equality - military culture depends on inequality

Civilian culture values achievement, with limitations - military culture is ruthlessly achievement oriented

Civilian culture values self-interest - military culture values self-sacrifice

Contrasts W/Civilian Culture

The occupational-social spectrum under the special mission of the military - no civilian analogue

Military organized by status Rank and caste system is visible everywhere Social dependency limits growth

opportunities and maximizes social control opportunities ‣ Behavior of military member is the

responsibility of the commander at all times

THE SOCIAL MATRIX

Highly structured society requires that all members of military family be accountable for their actions

Behavior of a family member is a direct reflection on the military member so child’s self-worth and identity are directly tied to the family

Pressure on the child and family to conform to values of the culture

Developing and maintaining beliefs worth dying for may be necessary for the family to survive as a unit

By moving continuously, self-identity could be lost through the loss of those who become part of that identity.

A new life must be reconstructed in a new community with new roles at each move

Many military families and BRATS display typical military determination when they relocate by denying their grief and loss

IDENTITY FORMATION FOR FAMILIES AND BRATS

The military family and the military BRAT may project unresolved feelings from previous relationships with new relationships - there is no time to resolve feelings.

In an ultimate betrayal, for the BRAT, even the security and structure of the military is eventually taken away from them

The life of military families, especially of military BRATS, could be described as a cycle of loss, grief, reorganization, loss, grief, reorganization and so on.

Unfortunately, for the BRAT, the loss and grief may very well be disenfranchised by the parents and other authority figures.

LOSS AND GRIEF CYCLES

The social construction of the military family is

◦ Based in military culture

◦ Supported and controlled by all needs being taken care of by the military

◦ Isolated in a social matrix with no civilian analogue

◦ Formed as an identity in a military context

◦ Lived in a cycle of grief, loss and reorganization

CONCLUSIONS

Some of the results of the military life on families

• Living in a subculture of social dependence within a dominant culture that highly values independence

• Living in a classist subculture within a dominant culture that denies classism

• Limiting family life by continuously moving in a subculture that extolls the virtues of family life

• Required to be team players in a culture that is highly competitive

• Loss of contact with community and extended family outside of military in a dominant culture that emphasizes community and extended family.

KEY STRESSORS FOR MILITARY FAMILIES- DOUBLE BINDS

The competition for career status and living in the double binds leads to stresses that create problems even for those families who make it to career status

For those families who don’t make it to career status, the personal investment in the military is lost

CONCLUSIONS: THE RESULTS OF THE MILITARY LIFE FOR FAMILIES

Family construction for military families is different from family construction for civilian families

The military family lives in an environmental bubble

Purposes Who are veterans, career military and their

families Who you are most likely to see in your

practice Mental models that influence our decisions Most important influences of the military life

on members and families Some of the results of the military life on

families

WHAT WE COVERED

Some of the problems we see with military families have to do with their environment

Some of the problems we see with military families have to do with their culture.

We often interpret behavior from the viewpoint of mainstream culture and experience including the conceptual frame of and DSM.

DO WE OVER PATHOLOGIZE?

Working With Military, Military Families and Military Brats is All About:◦ Cultural Sensitivity◦ Accepting the Person in their environment ◦ Understanding their environment◦ Helping them understand their environment◦ Helping them accept and use or reject and leave

their environment

WORKING WITH THE CAREER MILITARY FAMILY

04/10/2023

You do not need to know “special” methods to work with military families any more than you need to know “special” methods to work with anyone else. You use what you are comfortable with and knowledgeable of.

What you do need to know is the context and particulars of the life experience and life style of the individuals and their families.

You then need to decide what, if any, of your skills and knowledge may be helpful.

Prevention Conference System Wide Solutions, Inc. 2013 45

METHODS

George W. Appenzeller, LISW CP and APPO Box 11391Columbia, SC 29211(803)771-6663georgea@swsolutionsinc.comwww.swsolutionsinc.com

CONTACT INFORMATION

Working with Military Families

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