Neff - Stanford Talk

Kristin Neff, PhDUniversity of Texas at Austin

Self-Compassion and Individual Flourishing

Self-esteem

Global evaluation of self-worth

For years self-esteem was seen as the ultimate marker of wellbeing

Potential problems with high self-esteem

Not if you have it, but how you get it

The need to be special and above average

Social Comparison

Narcissism

Bullying and Prejudice

Contingency of Self-Worth

Self-Compassion

Three components of

self-compassion

Self-Kindness vs. Self-Judgment:

Treating self with care and understanding rather than harsh judgment

Actively soothing and comforting oneself

Common humanity vs. Isolation

Seeing own experience as part of larger human experience not isolating

Recognizing that life is imperfect (us too!)

Mindfulness vs. Over-identification

Allows us to “be” with painful feelings as they are Avoiding extremes of suppressing or running away with

painful feelings

Why isn’t self-compassion more

prevalent in Western culture?

Belief it’s weak, complacent and passive

Compassion can be a strong, powerful force for change

Confusion with “Making excuses”

Belief that motivation requiresself-criticism

Motivation with Self-Criticism

Fear of being bad or worthless

Motivation with Self-Compassion

Desire for health and well-being

Self-compassion provides the emotionally supportive environment needed for change

If possible….

Research on Self-Compassion

United States, Canada, United Kingdom,

Belgium, Netherlands, Thailand, Taiwan,

Korea, Turkey, Germany, Norway, Iran

2003 2004 2005 2006 2007 2008 2009 2010 2011 2012+

0

15

30

45

60

75

90

105

120

Journal articles, chapters and dissertations examining self-compassion (Google Scholar)

Reductions in: Anxiety, depression, stress, rumination, perfectionism, shame, negative body image

Self-compassion linked to well-being

Self-compassion linked to well-being

Increases in: Life satisfaction, happiness, connectedness, self-confidence, optimism, curiosity, gratitude

Self-compassion vs. self-esteemOffers same benefits without pitfalls

Fewer social comparisons

Less contingent self-worth

No association with narcissism

Linked to Coping and Resilience

Linked to health behaviors

Linked to greater motivation More intrinsic motivation, desire to learn & grow Personal standards just as high, not as upset

when don’t meet them Less fear of failure More likely to try again when fail

Linked to Other-Focused Concern

More forgiveness and perspective-taking

More compassion for others, empathy,

altruism

Mindful Self-Compassion Program

8-week workshop designed to explicitly teach skills of self-compassion

Uses meditation, informal practice, interpersonal exercises and homework assignments

Research on Mindful Self-Compassion

Randomized controlled trial

Intervention group vs. wait-list control group

54 participants

Percent increase in self-compassion, mindfulness, and compassion

2 (Group) X 2 (Time) Repeated Measures ANOVAs

*P < .05

Percent decrease in depression, anxiety, stress,and emotional avoidance

2 (Group) X 2 (Time) Repeated Measures ANOVAs

*P < .05

Percent increase in social connectedness, life satisfaction, and happiness

2 (Group) X 2 (Time) Repeated Measures ANOVAs

*P < .05

All well-being gains maintained over time

Self-Compassion

Self-compassion in the workplace?

Self-compassion calculator, videos, research articles, guided meditations

and exercises available at:

www.self-compassion.org