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Serving Active and Retired Military, DoD Workers and Civilians for More Than 39 Years www.militarypress.com
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In this issue26810161820
Midshipmenincreasestreak to 14Page 2
remember when...1971
Just look at the controversy surround-ing the release of Starbucks’ “holiday” cups this year. Social media went berserk because the cups had no writing on them. No mention of which holiday they were celebrating.
Of course, we all know the secret code. The overpriced, festive, red piece of cardboard in which I enjoy my caramel
macchiato isn’t a reference to Hanukkah. Or Kwanzaa. Or New Year’s, for that matter. It’s about Christmas, hence the shade akin to Santa’s coat.
But we can’t say the c-word.Now, don’t worry. This isn’t a tirade about the ways our pagan society has turned its back on Christ and the religious overtones of the “holi-
day.” Frankly, it’s doubtful he really cares whether we celebrate his birthday, and Christmas has become so secularized over the years
that we can hardly call it “religious.”And it’s not the crazy Christians or the pagan left that deserve
credit for this angry debate over lumping Dec. 25 with all the other holidays. No, it’s the rest of us — who have fallen into the trap of sacrificing truth to appease worries that we might (gasp!) offend someone.
Humbug to that.Some 80 percent of Americans celebrate Christmas,
and no matter how many “season’s greetings” and “happy holidays” you send to us, we know what you mean. “Merry Christmas” — and that’s what you should say.
Christmas is, without a doubt, the largest, most cel-ebrated Western holiday. In this age of multiculturalism, it’s regretful that we can’t keep some of our own culture — a culture 2,000 years in the making — while we fear re-
MERRYCHRISTMAS!
ARE YOU REALLY OFFENDED?Yes, Virginia, there is a “war on Christmas”
— and we’re losing it because we’re too afraid that you might get your feelings hurt.
CHRISTMAS, continued on Page 19
PREACHINGTO THE CHOIR
by Tom Chambers
2
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PHILADELPHIA — With a shot at history at stake, Keenan Reynolds end-ed his Navy career with a clean sweep against Army.
Navy coach Ken Niumatalolo just might go out the same way.
Reynolds rushed for two touchdowns and threw for another score to lead the No. 21 Midshipmen to their 14th straight win over the Black Knights 21-17 on Dec. 12 at Lincoln Financial Field.
“That was the No. 1 goal,” Reynolds said. “To be able to be here four years and never lose against Army, that’s huge.”
The Midshipmen (10-2) can hook an anchor to the Commander-In-Chief ’s Tro-phy. It’s coming back to Annapolis, Mary-land, after a one-year hiatus.
“We get to go to the White House this year and get our trophy back,” Reynolds said.
Reynolds’ second rushing touchdown was his 85th career score, the most for any Division I player. He is the first quarter-
back over the 116-game series to go 4-0.Niumatalolo improved to 8-0 against
the Black Knights (2-10) two days before he is set to visit BYU to talk about the pro-gram’s coaching vacancy.
Army coach Jeff Monken showed his program might be closing the gap on Navy but blew any chance of an upset in the fourth quarter.
Daniel Grochowski missed a 29-yard
field goal early in the quarter. Chris Carter lost a fumble at the Navy 34-yard line that was recovered by linebacker Ted Colburn.
Navy wide receiver Jamir Tillman dives for the end zone and scores what would be the winning touchdown, on a Keenan Reynolds pass in the third quarter. The Navy Midship-men defeated the Army West Point Black Knights, 21-17, in the 116th Army Navy Football Game at Lincoln Financial Field in Philadelphia.
NAVY SINKS ARMY ONCE MORE, 21-17Reynolds drives Midshipmen’s streak to 14
NAVY, continued on Page 16
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Here are some facts you may not know about the Army-Navy game tradition.
The first meeting between the United States Military Academy and the United States Naval Academy was on November 20, 1890. The Navy won the game 24-0 against the Army, kicking off a rivalry that has spanned more than a century.
At the start of the game the academies participate in a “prisoner swap,” where students who studied at their rival school for the semester are returned.
The president attends every game and has since President Theodore Roosevelt made it a tradition in 1901.
The current streak of 14 wins by the Navy is the longest in the rivalry’s history.
Instant replay made its debut during the 1963 rivalry game.
When Navy won the 1893 game, a rear admiral and a brigadier general got into a heated argument that almost led to a duel, and resulted in the two teams not compet-ing against the other for five years.
The incident is what prompted the move to the neutral location of Philadelphia.
The first helmet is widely thought to have been worn during the 1983 game.
The winner of the match is awarded the Thompson Cup, named after Robert M. Thompson who donated the trophy.
The winning service academy partici-pates in a tradition known as a “night of liberty,” where students are free of respon-sibilities.
Dwight Eisenhower played in the 1926 rivalry game, the only president to do so.
Every year the service academies film spirit videos, as a form of “trash talk” in the days leading up to the game.
It is a tradition for the service acad-emies to steal the opponent’s mascot the week of the game.
For the 1944 matchup, President Frank-
lin Roosevelt required anyone in atten-dance at the game to buy war bonds.
The winning school sings the loser’s alma mader first at the end of the game, as a sign of good sportsmanship.
Navy quarterback Keenan Reynolds finds a hole and runs 58-yards for a touchdown in the first quarter.
Game steeped in tradition
By Jim BransfieldThe Middletown Press
I watched the end of the Army vs. Navy game Dec. 12. Funny, I thought I was watching a sports event, but it turned out to be so much more.
The best thing? The post-game Alma Mater’s sung by both schools.
As I listened to them sing and looked at their images — some tear-stained — on the television, it occurred to me once again, that in spite of everything, our country has a bright future.
The American people, in their righteous might, cannot be defeated.
I don’t care what the threat, if we adhere to our values and not succumb to fear, hate and intolerance, if we do not answer the siren songs of ugly-American wanna-be leaders who preach exclusion, intolerance, and prejudice, the United States will again be a beacon of hope for the world.
We defeated the scourge of fascism in World War II, we outlasted the vicious-ness of international communism, we overcame the bane of slavery and Jim Crow, we are embarrassed at our intern-ment of Japanese-Americans in World War II and recognize how wrong and un-
It’s about more than football
FOOTBALL, continued on Page 17
4
By Jon BenneSBNation
The NFL playoff picture is starting to get a lot clearer. Two more teams punched their postseason tickets, while five were mathematically eliminated. Meanwhile, there is no shortage of drama in the NFC East, the AFC South has devolved back into a race to the bottom and the AFC North is far from over.
First, let’s talk about the clinching teams. The Arizona Cardinals secured their spot with a narrow win over the Minnesota Vikings, moving to 11-2. They could’ve clinched the NFC West if the Se-attle Seahawks somehow lost, but the Se-ahawks made quick work of the Baltimore
Ravens and moved up to the No. 5 seed, owning a tiebreaker win over the Vikings.
Seattle now has a two-game lead over the field in the NFC wild card race, but its running game is suddenly a concern after Thomas Rawls suffered a season-ending ankle injury.
The other clinching team is the New England Patriots, who shook off a two-game skid with a 27-6 thumping of the Houston Texans. The Patriots also re-claimed the top seed in the AFC after the Denver Broncos and Cincinnati Bengals stumbled earlier on Sunday.
The Bengals’ season got thrown for a loop when Andy Dalton broke his thumb, which could cost him the rest of the sea-son. That left AJ McCarron pressed into service, and he was helpless as the Pitts-burgh Steelers cruised to a 33-20 win. The Steelers are now just two games back of the Bengals and are one of the hottest teams in the league. This division race could get interesting real fast.
The NFC East remains unchanged - Washington and the Philadelphia Eagles both won to stay tied for first, with Washing-ton holding a head-to-head tiebreaker for now. It’s looking more and more like their Week 16 rematch will decide the division crown, unless the New York Giants some-how get back into this. The Dallas Cowboys are just about done at 4-9, but still not elim-inated yet because, again, NFC East.
Speaking of bad divisions, the AFC South went 1-3 on Sunday, with the only win coming from the Jacksonville Jaguars, who laid a 51-16 smack down on the In-dianapolis Colts. The Texans’ wild card hopes are almost over, and their Week 15 matchup with the Colts could be a win-or-go-home situation.
In the AFC West, the Broncos failed to clinch their division while the Kansas City Chiefs keep sneaking up, now sitting just two games behind. These teams split their regular season series, but Kansas City holds a slight edge in division record, so keep an eye out on that race. Andy Reid’s squad has somehow won seven in a row despite losing Jamaal Charles halfway through the year.
Finally, let’s bid a fond farewell to the Baltimore Ravens, Tennessee Titans, San Diego Chargers, Detroit Lions and San Francisco 49ers, who were officially elimi-nated from postseason contention this week. Better luck next year, and check out the latest draft position here.
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The San Diego Padres unveiled a new navy digital camouflage jersey modeled after U.S. Navy uniforms.
Continuing a longstanding tradition in San Diego, these uniforms will be worn for Sunday home games, which honor the military.
The full Sunday uniforms were debuted by Padres Manager Andy Green, Padres outfielder Wil Myers and Padres pitcher James Shields during a press conference on the flight deck of the USS Theodore Roosevelt.
Also in attendance were Padres President & CEO Mike Dee, San Diego Mayor Kevin Faulconer, Capt. Craig Clapperton, Commanding Officer of the USS Theodore Roosevelt, and 50 sailors from the USS Theodore Roosevelt.
The Padres worked directly with the U.S. Navy to receive permission to use its official blue camouflage digital pattern. The four-color (deck gray, haze gray, black and Navy blue) design is modeled after the Navy Working Uniform Type 1, which sailors affectionately refer to as their “blueberries.”
The Chief of Naval Operations officially authorized the blue camouflage uniforms to be worn by active duty sailors in August
2011. The jersey features the updated Padres wordmark across the chest and an American flag patch on the left sleeve. The Padres will wear gray pants at home on Sundays to match the lighter gray in the digital pattern.
The look will be topped off with the traditional Padres blue hat with a white “SD”.
The Marine digital camouflage jerseys Padres players have worn during Military Sundays since 2011 will be worn twice during the 2016 season — on U.S. Marine Corps Appreciation Day and on U.S. Army Appreciation Day. It will be updated with the new Padres wordmark.
Moving forward, the Marine and Navy digital camouflage jerseys both will remain in the Sunday jersey rotation, alternating each year which will be worn most often.
Padres players have worn camouflage jerseys in honor of the military for the past 16 seasons.
The club first introduced a camouflage design representing the Army (woodland design) in 2000.
In 2006, the design was updated to represent Navy SEALs (desert camouflage, worn from 2006-10). The current digitally produced MARPAT (Marine pattern) jersey has been worn for the past five seasons.
When replicas of the new Navy digital camouflage jerseys become available in the Padres Majestic Team Store, a portion of each sale will go back to the U.S. Navy.
San Diego Padres pitcher James Shields (left) and outfielder Wil Myers (right) pose for a picture with members of the U.S. Navy after revealing the team’s new navy digital camouflage jerseys modeled after U.S. Navy uniforms.
Padres unveil new Navy jerseyDigital camo cast from ‘blueberries’
6
By Oliver Lyttelton & Nicholas LaskinIndieWire
Christmas movies hit theaters this in advance of Thanksgiving. Stu-dios release their Christmas mov-ies well in advance to let them
play longer in theaters, knowing that few will want to see them once January rolls around. In an entirely unrelated move, we’ve been thinking about Christmas films. And so below, you’ll find 10 of the best ever.
‘Babes In Toyland’ (1930) Perhaps a Christmas movie more out
of its association with a ton of toys than because of a seasonal vibe (though Santa Claus does make an appearance), “Babes In Toyland,” a very loose adaptation of the operetta of the same name, is a movie that became a holiday TV staple, airing on New York’s WPIX for many years. If it does not quite encompass Laurel & Hardy’s fin-est hour, the film is certainly one of their most imaginative and family-friendly ef-forts. The two play Stannie and Ollie, two toymaker’s assistants who live in a shoe in Toyland who try to raise money to stop the evil Silas (Henry Kleinbach) from forcing
Bow Peep (Florence Roberts) to marry him against his will. Surprisingly convo-luted plot wise and even surprisingly scary by the time bogeymen invade at the end,
the film perhaps suffers in comparison to Laurel & Hardy’s best by letting the comedy take a back seat to the plot and adventure elements. But the two are as good as ever when given a chance, the film makes good use of the music throughout, and there’s a level of imagination at play that should still capture the attention of kids who aren’t checking Twitter every five minutes...
‘A Christmas Story’ (1983) Christmas movies become classics not
necessarily on release, but often due to a time-honored tradition of endless TV repetition while you’re in a food coma. It happened to “It’s A Wonderful Life” back in the day, it happened to “Elf ” and “Love Actually” since, and it’s happened to “A Christmas Story,” which airs in a continu-ous Christmas Eve marathon on TBS every year. Based on stories by anecdotalist Jean Shepherd, the film follows young Ralphie (Peter Billingsley, who’d grow up to be a director and inflict “Couples Retreat” on us) growing up in the 1940s and dream-ing of a BB gun, while his parents (Darren McGavin and Melinda Dillon) feud over the fire, the next door dogs, and a lamp in the shape of a woman’s leg. Directed by “Porky’s” helmer Bob Clark, who co-wrote with Shepherd, this is a rare Christmas movie that doesn’t over-sentimentalize childhood, opting instead for a winningly specific look at family life and as much focus on the perceived injustices of pre-adolescence as on heartwarming holiday cheer. Those of us who grew up outside the U.S. and didn’t have it as a childhood sta-ple might be a little puzzled by its place in the canon — it’s very sitcomy, in part be-cause Clark shoots it that way — but there are certainly worse movies to watch twelve times in a row while present-wrapping.
‘Die Hard’ (1988) There’s something irritably smug about
the people who announce, usually unpro-voked, that “Die Hard” is their favorite Christmas movie — it’s like people whose favorite Beatle is Ringo, or who never fail to mention how they’re not on Facebook. But that doesn’t change the fact that “Die Hard” is one of the three or four best ac-tion movies ever made and an indisput-ably excellent Christmas film, or at least Christmas-set film. Adapted from Roder-ick Thorp’s novel, it’s a lean, perfectly con-structed thriller that sees NYPD Detective John McClane (Bruce Willis) heading to L.A, where his estranged wife (Bonnie Bedelia) is working, to attempt to win her back, only to be caught up when terrorists take over the building where she works. Sure, the film mostly uses Christmas as iconography and backdrop, and yes, the film wasn’t released during the season (it opened in July of that year), but the film works in part because of the backbone of reuniting an estranged family, and what’s more Christmasy than that? Of course, it also works because of the terrific perfor-mances by Willis, Alan Rickman and oth-ers, the immaculate direction by John Mc-Tiernan, the terrific script, and more. But also: Christmas.
‘Elf’ (2003)Nearly all of Will Ferrell’s characters
seem possessed by a sort of indefinable mania. Sometimes it’s is hidden beneath a fairly normal veneer (“Old School”, “The Other Guys”), and other times it is not (“Step Brothers”). In Jon Favreau’s charm-ing yuletide yarn “Elf,” Ferrell dials down the vulgarity and aggression that his dun-derheaded comic characters often exudes and turns in one of his most earnest, poi-gnant performances to date. The film isn’t exactly substantial — even at its best, it’s light as a cream puff — but as an example of its genre, it’s got heart and laughs to spare. The plot of the film involves Ferrell as one of Santa’s elves who grows up and travels
THE 10 BEST CHRISTMAS MOVIES OF ALL TIME
Some movies, like “A Christmas Story,” become classics long after their release through repeated airings on television.
7
to New York to find his biological father (James Caan) and his apparently never-ending quest to spread Christmas cheer, even where it is clearly not wanted. The film reflects Buddy’s restlessly optimistic tone, making it a decidedly old-fashioned and satisfying holiday entertainment (the stop-motion animation that’s heavily pres-ent early in the film fondly recalls Rankin Bass’s animated special “Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer”). A winning mix of tradi-tional holiday farce and a typically irrever-ent Ferrell vehicle, “Elf ” holds up probably better than it should — it’s just the right mix of old and new and features one of Ferrell’s most heartrending turns.
‘Gremlins’ (1984)This season will see “Krampus” try to
capture a mix of horror, comedy and fes-tive spirit that’s really only been pulled off once, via Joe Dante’s glorious “Gremlins.” Like “Die Hard,” released in the summer but set at Christmas, it’s a gorgeously and subversively funny, splattery monster movie with a big heart, but aside from its snowy setting, its greatest contribution to the Christmas canon might be Phoebe Cates’ dry, darkly hilarious monologue. “The worst thing that ever happened to me was on Christmas. Oh, God. It was so horrible. It was Christmas Eve. I was 9- years-old. Me and mom were decorat-ing the tree, waiting for dad to come home
from work. A couple hours went by. Dad wasn’t home. So mom called the office. No answer. Christmas Day came and went, and still nothing. So the police began a search. Four or five days went by. Neither one of us could eat or sleep. Everything
was falling apart. It was snowing outside. The house was freezing, so I went to try to light up the fire. That’s when I noticed the smell. The firemen came and broke through the chimney top. And me and mom were expecting them to pull out a
dead cat or a bird. And instead they pulled out my father. He was dressed in a Santa Claus suit. He’d been climbing down the chimney... his arms loaded with presents. He was gonna surprise us. He slipped and broke his neck. He died instantly. And that’s how I found out there was no Santa Claus.”
‘Home Alone’ (1990)The film that was until recently the
most successful live-action comedy of all time, and also the inspiration for a whole generation of ’90s kids to create imagi-nary, elaborate traps with which they could thwart intruders, “Home Alone” is really an escalating series of frenzied, violent gags culminating is a not-so-sur-prisingly sentimental finish. It’s somewhat comforting in its familiarity: even if you’ve seen the film dozens of times and can see the gags coming from a mile away, “Home Alone” is still the zippy, spirited holiday classic that made Macaulay Culkin a star and cemented Joe Pesci (the same year he starred in Martin Scorsese’s “Goodfellas,” go figure) and Daniel Stern as bumbling suburban bogeymen. It’s easy to see the appeal that Culkin’s Kevin McCallister has for the younger viewer: he is an unapolo-getic rule-breaker, living by his own set of principles. What does he do when his par-
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Even if you’ve seen “Home Alone” a dozen times, it’s still holds up as a holiday classic.
CHRISTMAS MOVIES, continued on Page 14
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The Marine Corps, after reviewing a study of the feasibility of building an in-ternational airport on Camp Pendleton released a statement saying it does not support the idea.
California State University San Mar-cos MBA students unveiled an economic analysis Wednesday night to an auditori-um full of students and interested parties, including San Diego businessmen Irwin Jacobs and Malin Burnham, who support exploring the idea.
The business graduates presented their findings that a Southern California Inter-national Airport with two runways could
be built in the southwest corner of Camp Pendleton for less than $10 billion. Their research suggests alternatives to tradi-tional methods of airport financing with public bonds.
The students advocated for public and private partnerships, including attracting an international air carrier to help design the airport as a mega hub.
The study found that only 26 percent of international departures leave from the West Coast, while 41 percent leave from the East Coast and 33 percent leave from hubs in the Midwest.
Bearing in mind that trade with the Pa-cific Rim is increasingly competing with European connections, the report argues there is a strong case to be made for a new international airline hub in Southern California.
However, the research did not include comparisons with San Bernardino Inter-national Airport, which has failed to at-tract an international airline, in spite of a major investment of $200 million to con-vert the former Norton Air Force Base into a commercial airport.
The CSUSM study estimated a new international airport would yield annual economic benefits of between $2 bil-lion and $5 billion, mainly due to grow-ing tourism from China. The analysis showed regional businesses benefitting, including neighboring casinos.
Increased real estate values were also presented as a benefit, since wealthy visi-tors from Asia would be in a position to bid up the price of real estate.
The response from Marine Corps Instal-lations West was similar to the reaction in 2006, when an initiative on the ballot suggested building a joint civilian/mili-tary airport at Marine Corps Air Station Miramar.
In a statement, Carl B Redding Jr., di-rector of public affairs for Marine Corps Installations West at Camp Pendleton, wrote:
“Camp Pendleton is not supportive of any plan to house an international airport on the base. As the largest coastal base for the Marine Corps and the only location on the West Coast to conduct amphibious landing operations and training, Camp Pendleton is a unique and irreplaceable asset important to the defense of the na-tion and its interests around the world.”
“The primary value of Camp Pendleton is in its ranges — integrated land, sea, and air space, with committed live-fire op-portunities unmatched anywhere in the world. These training ranges cannot be re-placed or duplicated,” the statement read.
“Furthermore, Marines aboard Camp Pendleton conduct artillery, mortar, and air-to-ground munitions training, which is incompatible with housing a large inter-national airport on the base.
“Plus, the impacts to the environment and surrounding communities will re-quire expensive and extensive mitiga-tion efforts destroying years of carefully planned and executed environmental stewardship of both Camp Pendleton and its neighbors.
“Simply put, building an international airport anywhere on Camp Pendleton renders the rest of the base effectively unusable for Marine Corps training evo-lutions like Exercise Steel Knight that is currently being conducted and places into jeopardy the mission of the Marine Corps on the base.”
A representative from California As-semblyman Rocky Chavez’ office spoke at the CSUSM presentation, and urged students to become more conversant with the role of Camp Pendleton in national defense.
The presentation ended on a hopeful note as professor Glen Brodowsky said he expects the three years of research will open future dialogue on the possibilities.
An aiport at Camp Pendleton? Marines say ‘no way’Corps blasts Cal State study
2015 sets record for U.S. terror arrests
The United States has arrested 71 people on charges connected to the ac-tivities of the Islamic State since March 2014, including 56 this year — a record number of terrorist arrests since the Sept. 11, 2001 attacks. A new study from George Washington University outlines the demographics of the people ar-rested, which paint a chilling picture of ISIS’ recruiting efforts.
“While jihadist causes have lured American recruits for several decades, the surge spurred by the rise of ISIS and its sophisticated marketing of its coun-ter-culture to impressionable Ameri-cans is unprecedented,” the study says.
The group is so diverse, ranging from a 15-year-old boy to a 47-year-old Air Force Veteran, that it makes it hard for authorities to find a solution to prevent-ing their radicalization.
They come from different states, so-cioeconomic and ethnic backgrounds, “defying any cookie-cutter profile of the American ISIS supporter,” the re-searchers say. They include college stu-dents, teenage girls, and a former fun-damentalist Christian, from all over the United States.
The study does identify some broad trends. The recruits are young, on aver-age 26 years old; 86 percent are men, and the overwhelming majority are U.S. citizens. It confirms data from a previ-ous study from March conducted by Fordham University’s School of Law.
As of this fall, authorities mention a total of about 250 Americans who have either traveled or attempted to go to the Middle East to join ISIS, and 900 active investigations against the organization’s sympathizers across the country.
American ISIS supporters, far away from the battlefields in Syria and Iraq, are active on social media, especially Twitter, “where they spasmodically cre-ate accounts that often get suspended in a never-ending cat-and-mouse game,” the study says. It may be hard to tell who will make the leap from online fanboy to armed militant, but the U.S. govern-ment’s methods of determining and ar-resting alleged recruits have been criti-cized in the past, for overblowing the threats they posed or for coaxing them into illegal territory where they might not have ventured on their own.
The number of ISIS supporters at-tempting to go overseas has dropped in recent months, authorities say. As the New York Times points out, that’s a worrying trend, as ISIS’ new message to its supporters is to stay in place and carry out attacks at home.
9
JOINT BASE MCGUIRE-DIX-LAKEHURST, N.J. — In 1955, the Cold War was eight years old.
Tensions between the United States and the Soviet Union were high.
Joseph Stalin was dead, Nikita Khrush-chev had taken his place, the Warsaw Pact had been created and the Continen-tal Air Defense Command (CONAD) — NORAD’s (North American Aerospace Defense Command) forerunner — had been established with the mission of “de-fending the United States against air attack.” This was all part of President Dwight D. Eisenhower’s New Look Policy toward containing the Soviet threat.
At the CONAD operations center in Colorado Springs, Colorado, there was a direct line phone to the center’s director of operations. Its purpose: To inform CON-AD that United States was at war with the Soviet Union.
In December 1955, the phone rang.Fortunately for Col. Harry Shoup, the
director of operations, the United States had not gone to war with Russia. Instead of the president, it was a little girl in Col-orado Springs. The child, who was fol-lowing the directions in a Sears Roebuck
& Co. advertisement printed in a local newspaper.
The ad read: “Hey, Kiddies! Call me di-
rect and be sure and dial the correct num-ber.” The number in the advertisement was one digit off and instead of getting the
local department store it went directly to
NORAD TRACKS SANTA: A 60-YEAR TRADITION
Col. Harry Shoup, the operations officer at NORAD on Dec. 24, 1955, answered a child’s wrong-number call and began the tradition of NORAD tracking Santa. Shoup died March 14, 2009, yet the tradition he started decades ago continues to bring holiday cheer to millions of children around the world.
NORAD, continued on Page 17
10
World eventsRolls-Royce goes bankrupt and is na-
tionalized in Britain on Feb. 4.The U.S., U.K., U.S.S.R. and others sign
the Seabed Treaty on Feb. 11, outlawing nuclear weapons on the ocean floor.
Backed by American air and artillery support, South Vietnamese troops invade Laos on Feb. 13.
Richard Nixon37th U.S. PresidentServed Jan. 20, 1969 – Aug. 9, 1974
‘In the long term we can hope that religion will change the nature of man and reduce conflict. But history is not encouraging in this respect.’
Egypt, Libya and Syria sign an agree-ment April 17 to form a confederation.
The U.S. dollar floods the European currency markets May 5 and threatens especially the Deutsche Mark; the central banks of Austria, Belgium, Netherlands and Switzerland stop the currency trading.
The U.S. ends its trade embargo of China on June 10.
Australia and New Zealand decide to withdraw their troops from Vietnam on Aug. 18.
Greenpeace is founded in Vancouver, Canada on Oct. 14.
President Richard M. Nixon sets Febru-ary 1, 1972, as the deadline for the removal of another 45,000 American troops from Vietnam on Nov. 12.
U.S. NewsA ban on radio and television cigarette
advertisements goes into effect Jan. 2 in the United States.
The landmark television sitcom “All in the Family,” starring Carroll O’Connor as Archie Bunker, debuts on CBS Jan. 12.
In Los Angeles, Charles Manson and three female “Family” members are found guilty Jan. 25 of the 1969 Tate–LaBianca murders. Manson would be sentenced to death April 9.
A new stock market index called the Nasdaq Composite debuts Feb. 8.
Evel Knievel sets a world record and jumps 19 cars Feb. 28 in Ontario, Calif.
“All in the Family” begins airing on CBS.
A bomb explodes March 1 in the men’s room at the United States Capitol; the Weather Underground claims responsibil-ity.
Boxer Joe Frazier defeats Muhammad Ali at Madison Square Garden during the “Fight of the Century” on March 8.
Five hundred thousand people in Wash-ington, D.C. and 125,000 in San Francisco march April 24 in protest against the Viet-nam War.
Amtrak begins inter-city rail passenger service in the United States on May 1.
The New York Times begins to publish the Pentagon Papers on June 13.
President Nixon declares the U.S. War on Drugs on June 17.
The 26th Amendment to the United States Constitution, formally certified by President Nixon on July 5, lowers the vot-ing age from 21 to 18.
The South Tower of the World Trade Center is topped out at 1,362 feet on July 19, mak-ing it the second tallest building in the world.
Apollo 15 astronauts David Scott and James Irwin become the first to ride in a lunar rover July 31, a day after landing on the Moon.
Construction begins on
Spiro Agnew39th U.S. Vice President
Served Jan. 20, 1969 – Oct. 19, 1973
Dodge Demon
Joe Frazier defeats Muhammad Ali.
“The French Connection” debuts.
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BORN THIS YEAR: Christina Applegate, actress (Nov. 25). Above left: Mark Wahlber, rapper, actor (June 5); Elon Musk, engineer (June 28); Amy Poehler, actress
(Sept. 16); Lance Armstrong, cyclist (Sept. 18).
“All in the Family” begins airing on CBS.
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the Louisiana Superdome in New Orleans on Aug. 11.
President Nixon announces the end of the gold standard Aug. 15.
Walt Disney World opens Oct. 1 in Or-lando, Florida.
Movies“The French Connection”“A Clockwork Orange”“Fiddler on the Roof”“Harold and Maude”“Diamonds Are Forever”“Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory”“The Last Picture Show”“Carnal Knowledge”“Shaft”“Escape From the Planet of the Apes”
Music“My Sweet Lord,” George Harrison“Imagine,” John Lennon“I Beg Your Pardon (I Never Promised You a Rose Garden),” Lynn Anderson“Maggie May,” Rod Stewart“Brown Sugar,” The Rolling Stones“Theme from ‘Shaft,’” Isaac Hayes
1971“She’s a Lady,” Tom Jones“Joy to the World,” Three Dog Night“It’s Too Late,” Carol King“Knock Three Times,” Tony Orlando & Dawn
12
Army cuts social security numbers from dog tags
U.S. Army dog tags will no longer in-clude soldiers’ Social Security numbers, the Army announced, ending a more than 40-year identification system.
The tags will instead display the 10-digit Defense Department identification num-ber currently included on Pentagon ID cards, and will be issued to soldiers on an as-needed basis, with those deploying get-ting priority, service officials said in a press release.
“This change is not something where Soldiers need to run out and get new tags made,” Michael Klemowski, the soldiers programs branch chief at U.S. Army Hu-man Resources Command, said in the re-lease. “We are focusing first on the person-nel who are going to deploy. If a Soldier is going to deploy, they are the first ones that need to have the new ID tags.”
The change was first published in Army
Pamphlet 600-8-14 on Nov. 30, officials said. The switch is being done in an effort to reduce the use of Social Security num-bers and curb identity theft, they said.
“I think removing the social will help,” Klemowski said.
“If you find a pair of lost ID tags you can pretty much do anything with that person’s identity because you now have their blood type, their religion, you have their social, and you have their name. The only thing missing is their birth date and you can usually get that by Googling a person.”
The Defense Department in 2007 announced plans to move away from using Social Security numbers. The Pentagon in 2009 began removing the number from military ID cards. Social Security numbers, however, continue to be used throughout the Army and mili-tary, including in the Defense Eligibil-ity and Enrollment system, or DEERS, to identify service members and their dependents.
It appears that the Army is the only ser-vice thus far to make the dog tag change.
Bubble wrap puts Air Force base on lockdown
Kirtland Air Force Base, a hospital and three schools in Albuquerque, New Mexi-co, were locked down for almost an hour
Dec. 2 as authorities investigated reports that at least three gunshots were heard.
The night of Dec. 3, it was disclosed that there were no gunshots. But there was bubble wrap — irresistibly poppable bubble wrap.
The base lifted the lockdown with the bland explanation that “security forces could not substantiate the claims of gun-fire.” Master Sgt. Phyllis Keith, a spokes-woman for the base, finally told NBC sta-tion KOB on Dec. 3 that the bangs came from someone who was popping “heavy duty” bubble wrap.
Navy’s largest destroyer heads for sea trials
The largest destroyer ever built for the U.S. Navy headed out to sea for the first time Dec. 7, departing from shipbuilder Bath Iron Works and carefully navigating the winding Kennebec River before reach-ing the open ocean where the ship will un-dergo sea trials.
More than 200 shipbuilders, sailors and residents gathered to watch as the futur-istic 600-foot, 15,000-ton USS Zumwalt glided past Fort Popham, accompanied by tugboats.
Kelley Campana, a Bath Iron Works employee, said she had goose bumps and tears in her eyes.
“This is pretty exciting. It’s a great day to
be a shipbuilder and to be an American,” she said. “It’s the first in its class. There’s never been anything like it. It looks like the future.”
Larry Harris, a retired Raytheon em-ployee who worked on the ship, watched it depart from Bath.
“It’s as cool as can be. It’s nice to see it underway,” he said. “Hopefully, it will per-form as advertised.”
Bath Iron Works will be testing the ship’s performance and making tweaks this winter. The goal is to deliver it to the Navy sometime next year.
“We are absolutely fired up to see Zum-walt get underway. For the crew and all those involved in designing, building, and readying this fantastic ship, this is a huge milestone,” the ship’s skipper, Navy Capt. James Kirk, said before the ship departed.
The ship has electric propulsion, new radar and sonar, powerful missiles and guns, and a stealthy design to reduce its radar signature.
Advanced automation will allow the warship to operate with a much smaller crew size than current destroyers.
All of that innovation has led to con-struction delays and a growing price tag. The Zumwalt, the first of three ships in the class, will cost at least $4.4 billion.
The ship looks like nothing ever built at Bath Iron Works.
The inverse bow juts forward to slice
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through the waves. Sharp angles deflect enemy radar signals. Radar and antennas are hidden in a composite deckhouse.
The builder sea trials will answer any questions of seaworthiness for a ship that utilizes a type of hull associated with pre-dreadnought battleships from a century ago.
Critics say the “tumblehome” hull’s slop-ing shape makes it less stable than con-ventional hulls, but it contributes to the ship’s stealth and the Navy is confident in the design.
Eric Wertheim, author and editor of the U.S. Naval Institute’s “Guide to Combat Fleets of the World,” said there’s no ques-tion the integration of so many new sys-tems from the electric drive to the tumble-home hull carries some level of risk.
Operational concerns, growing costs and fleet makeup led the Navy to trun-cate the 32-ship program to three ships, he said. With only three ships, the class of destroyers could become something of a technology demonstration project, he said.
Air Force’s prayer circle under investigation
A decade after the Air Force Academy football team invited controversy and censure over an “I am a member of Team Jesus” banner in its locker room, the Fal-cons again appear to be striking a decid-edly Christian pose, its members dropping
to one knee and holding hands in a public pre-game prayer circle.
The academy issued a statement saying it is investigating the practice after cadets and faculty brought it to the attention of the Military Religious Freedom Founda-tion, a watchdog group.
“The United States Air Force Academy is attentive to all religious freedom con-cerns, and we are conducting an inquiry into the complaint,” a statement from the
school said. “The Air Force is dedicated to maintain-
ing an environment in which people can realize their highest potential, regardless of personal religious or other beliefs.”
The academy did not say how long the Falcons have been offering the team prayer. One photo on a Defense Depart-ment website shows the team at prayer before the start of the second half of a 2013 game.
Mikey Weinstein, president and founder of the Military Religious Freedom Foun-dation, said the Falcons’ public prayer rit-ual falls afoul of the establishment clause by creating the appearance that the acad-emy shows a preference for a particular organized religion.
Cadets and faculty who have contacted him said some players take part in the prayer circle to avoid conflict with other teammates or out of fear of retaliation.
14
ents leave him alone at home for Christ-mas vacation? Why, he binges on junk food, watches violent movies and uses his wits and know-how to fend off two in-competent crooks who’ve been casing his parent’s posh Chicago home. The film’s violence is juvenile and slightly overblown — that staircase scene with the tarantula sure is icky. Again, there’s something com-forting about that ending, even if you can’t help but marvel at how cheesy it is. Then again, is cheese necessarily a bad thing for a Christmas movie?
‘It’s A Wonderful Life’ (1946) A universally recognized Christmas
classic, “It’s A Wonderful Life” had to bat-tle hard to get to that status: it flopped at first and was even denounced by the FBI as being sympathetic to Communists, but became a beloved perennial via TV broad-casts in the 1970s (“it’s the damndest thing I’ve ever seen,” director Frank Capra told the Wall Street Journal in 1984. “I’m like a parent whose kid grows up to be presi-dent. I’m proud... but it’s the kid who did the work”). It’s perhaps not surprising, given that the film’s so much darker and stranger than many remember. The film sees the suicidal George Bailey (Jimmy Stewart) shown how life would have been without him by his guardian angel Clar-ence. It’s less concerned with holiday trap-pings than many of the films on this list, but the Christmas setting feels utterly ap-propriate, both for the echoes of Charles Dickens and for its spirit of the power of family and community. It’s positively nov-elistic in its portrait of ordinary American life in the first half, but then pulls a power-ful trick in showing the impact one indi-vidual has on his people in his life.
‘Miracle On 34th Street’ (1947) The existence (or not?) of Santa Claus/
Father Christmas is at the heart of all kinds of Christmas movies, but it’s rarely
been tackled more effectively than with “Miracle On 34th Street,” George Seaton’s heart-swellingly sweet tale based on a story by Valentine Davies. Set in an ini-tially rather more cynical take on post-war New York than commonly employed (it’s almost striking to see an overly-commer-cialized festive period in a movie nearly 70 years old), the film sees the elderly Kris Kringle (Edmund Gwenn) taking over the role of Macy’s Santa, winning hearts with his selfless, loving persona. Yet he’s also being accused of being mentally un-sound by those suspicious of his goodness. In the end, it has to come down to the young Susan (Natalie Wood in her break-through role) to save the day and convince her weary mother (Maureen O’Hara) of the spirit of Christmas. It’s a shame-less heart-twanger in the spirit of Capra, though with a rather more scabrous wit in places, but as in the film’s universe, even the most hard-hearted cynic (or Academy member: the film was nominated for mul-tiple Oscars and won for the screenplay and Gwenn’s performance) will surely be
worn down by the time countless bags of mail are dumped in the courtroom where Santa is on trial.
‘Scrooged’ (1988) You must imagine that “Scrooged” was
greenlit on one of the shortest pitches in history: “Bill Murray does ‘A Christmas Carol.’” Sold! Charles Dickens’ classic and its grouchy lead were seemingly made for the comedy legend, and a big-budget, effects-packed take in the manner of his biggest hit “Ghostbusters” seemed to be a licence to print money. The film was poorly received, though fairly success-ful, and that seems to be a fair response to a film that’s wildly uneven, contain-ing fits of inspiration and the occasion-ally embarrassing moment. Updating the original story to present-day New York, with Murray’s Scrooge-surrogate TV pro-ducer being escorted through past, pres-ent and future by a trio of ghosts, you feel the tension between Murray’s anarchic persona and the idea of a big-budget Christmas heartwarmer throughout, and
the former is usually more successful - the unconventional casting of New York Dolls’ David Johansen as the cab-driver-ish Ghost Of Christmas Past works like gangbusters, for instance. But for every roll of the dice that pays off, there’s an-other that doesn’t, like the idea of turning Bob Cratchit (Bobcat Goldthwait) into a potential mass shooter. And at this point, filmmakers hadn’t yet worked out how to use Murray for heart as well as laughs - unlike in “Groundhog Day” a few years later, his redemption doesn’t convince. But the actor holds things together so well that, despite the flaws, you have a very good time anyway.
‘White Christmas’ (1954) Irving Berlin’s “White Christmas” is one
of the absolute best-known holiday songs, but as any good trivia quiz will tell you, the song didn’t premiere in the movie that it gave its name to, but in “Holiday Inn” a decade earlier. Nevertheless, the latter barely qualifies as a Christmas movie, re-volving around all kinds of different holi-days, so its later successor makes the list in its place. Michael Curtiz’s film is thinly plotted even by the standards of the genre, as Broadway producers Bing Crosby and Danny Kaye (who took the role after Fred Astaire and Donald O’Connor passed) try and help their old army commanding of-ficer to save his Vermont inn, threatened with closure due to lack of snow, while falling for a pair of singers (Vera-Ellen and Rosemary Clooney). But while it does feel disposable, it’s also very charming, with not just the big title number, but also songs like “Sisters,” “Count Your Blessings (Instead Of Sheep)” and “The Best Things Happen When You’re Dancing” working delightfully, and an exuberantly good-spirited nature to the whole thing. While the central pairings don’t have the star power of, say, “High Society,” everyone’s in fine fettle, and the film looks utterly gor-geous too: it was the first movie released in VistaVision, Paramount’s answer to CinemaScope, and an early predecessor to IMAX in using large film formats to boost cinema attendance thanks to the threat of television. Everything old is new again...
CHRISTMAS MOVIESContinued from Page 7
Irving Berlin’s “White Christmas” didn’t debut in the movie it gave its name too, but a decade earlier in “Holiday Inn.”
15
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At the southernmost finger of Louisi-ana, where the Mississippi River mingles with the Gulf of Mexico, Chris Ring finally caught his breath.
The 28-year-old U.S. Navy combat vet-eran had been swimming--and swimming.
He had started June 6 at Itasca State Park, splashing down the Mississippi in a 2,552-mile paddle honoring families who have lost loved ones to war.
“Those families paid a huge sacrifice,” Ring said June 9 when he visited Neil-son Place in Bemidji. “We have the duty to honor those families and the ones that have fallen for us.”
His swim started on D-Day and was scheduled to end on Veterans Day. Fatigue and a shoulder injury slowed his pace.
He averaged about seven hours in the water per day, swimming about 14 miles.
In the evenings, he dripped out of the river and spent nights in towns and cit-ies along the banks, meeting some of the families for whom he swam.
Ring represents Legacies Alive, a non-profit seeking awareness for America’s “Gold Star” families. His swim is part of the Legacies “challenge” program, in which people attempt to raise awareness through extreme journeys.
According to the Legacies Alive Face-
book page:Ring started the last leg about 1:30
p.m. Dec. 4 near mile marker 3 in Pilot-town, La.
He finished near mile marker 0 at the mouth of the Mississippi, called Head of Passes.
He was the first American to complete the swim. He had lost weight and grown a bushy beard.
Gold Star families from eight states were waiting at Head of Passes to greet him.
Veteran swims length of Mississippi to honor fallen
Chris Ring, recently swam the Mississippi River to honor family members of fallen service members.
16
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Navy had two interceptions — one off a trick play — on two straight drives to pre-serve the lead. Army’s Hail Mary on the final play of the game fell short.
“That’s our job at West Point, to build those warriors,” Monken said. “I’m ab-solutely positive we’ve got a room full of guys in there that are going to find a way to win.”
Niumatalolo, the winningest coach in Navy history, seemed focused with “Damn The Torpedoes” stenciled on the back of his hat. But he had much more on his mind than just dominating Army again. He could leave after eight seasons to fol-low his heart and religion to BYU.
“We’re an institution, and we’re certainly a football program, that’s steeped in team and not about ‘me.’ All of a sudden, it’s be-come about that,” Navy athletic director
Chet Gladchuk said before the game.Niumatalolo danced — he at least tried
to dab — in the locker room as players cir-cled him and hollered in celebration.
He choked back tears discussing his faith-based decision to visit BYU. Niumat-alolo is a Mormon who went on a two-year mission after his freshman year at Hawaii.
“It’s been my life,” at Navy, he said. “My kids have grown up here. I’ve given every-thing for his program.”
Niumatalolo tied former Army coach Earl “Red” Blaik (8-8-2) for most wins in the series.
Reynolds put the spotlight back on the game and showed why he was a late con-tender for Heisman Trophy consideration. Reynolds, the only player in team history with two 1,000-yard rushing and pass-ing seasons, put the Mids up 21-17 with a 50-yard touchdown pass to Jamir Tillman late in the third quarter.
A three-touchdown favorite, Navy had it
tougher than usual in one of the most sto-ried rivalries in college sports. The Mids won the CIC trophy, awarded to the team with the best record in games among the three service academies. Navy beat Air Force 33-11 this season.
Army and Navy turned a game already stuffed with pomp and patriotism into a bit of a fashion show.
Navy wore seven different hand-painted helmets that paid homage to seven of the ships that make up the U.S. Naval Fleet.
Army topped its rival with 17 helmets, representing the 17 branches cadets can enter after graduation.
Billed as “America’s Game,” the Linc was stuffed with cadets and midshipmen standing, bouncing and cheering the en-tire game. U.S. Defense Secretary Ash Carter attended and watched a half with each side.
Army came ready to pull an upset and snap the second-longest losing streak to
one team of any uninterrupted FBS series.The Black Knights got a field goal on the
game’s opening drive, and Tyler Campbell scored on a 29-yard run to make it 10-7 in the first.
Carter hit Edgar Poe for a 39-yard touchdown pass with 2:08 left in the half to make it 17-14 and give Army its first halftime lead since 2009.
Army just didn’t have Reynolds.Reynolds scored on runs of 58 yards and
1 yard to keep Navy in the game and then used his arm to find Tillman in the third to take the lead for good.
He has a 31-13 career record as a starter and is Navy’s career leading rusher. Hoist that broom to the mast: Reynolds is the first quarterback to go 4-for-4 in a classic rivalry that began in 1890.
Army’s season again ended with this game. Navy plays Pittsburgh (8-4) in the Dec. 28 Military Bowl in Annapolis.
Navy leads the series 60-49-7.
NAVYContinued from Page 2
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American that was, and we continue to fight the evils of racism and homophobia in building what Ronald Reagan called this City on the Hill.
If we do not give in to the forces of dark-ness, no one, no group of erstwhile terror-ists, no nation of evil can stand in front of a united America.
If we do give in, then we are not worthy of survival.
The bright faces of the cadets and mid-shipmen of West Point and Annapolis re-minded me of that yet again.
I thought I was watching a football game; it was America I was watching.
Thank you ladies and gentlemen for helping to restore my faith in the essential goodness of the American people.
My country ’tis of thee, sweet land of liberty ...
FOOTBALLContinued from Page 3
CONAD.The child asked Shoup if he was Santa
Claus. Shoup paused, but he recovered and replied, “Yes, I am.”
More calls started coming in. Shoup eventually had his Airmen take over tell-ing them to that they now had an addi-tional duty: Whoever answered the phone was Santa Claus.
Sixty years later, the tradition continues.Beginning Dec. 1, visitors can visit www.
noradsanta.org. The website features a mobile version, a holiday countdown, new games, daily activities and is available in eight languages: English, Spanish, Ger-man, French, Italian, Chinese, Japanese and Portuguese.
Official NORAD Tracks Santa apps are available in the Windows, Apple and Google Play stores, so parents and chil-
dren can countdown the days until Santa’s launch on their smart phones and tablets.
Tracking opportunities are also of-
fered on Facebook, Twitter, YouTube and Google. Santa followers can go to any of these sites and search for “@noradsanta” to get started.
On Dec. 24, the website will be on duty as Santa Claus makes his way around the world.
Starting at 12:01 a.m. MST on Dec. 24 — 11:01 p.m. Dec. 23 PST, website visitors can watch Santa make preparations for his flight. NORAD’s “Santa Cams” will stream videos as Santa makes his way around the world delivering presents.
At 4 a.m. Mountain Standard Time — 3 a.m. Pacific Standard Time, trackers worldwide can speak with a live phone op-erator to inquire as to Santa’s whereabouts by dialing the toll-free number 1-877-Hi-NORAD (1-877-446-6723) or by sending an email to noradtrackssanta@outlook.com.
Now the most important part is making sure you are on Santa’s “Nice” list.
NORADContinued from Page 9
18
Under the mistletoeIt was slightly before Thanksgiving.
The trip went reasonably well, and I was ready to go back. The airport on the other end had turned a tacky red and green, and loudspeakers blared annoying elevator renditions of cherished Christmas carols.
Being someone who took Christmas very seriously, and being slightly tired, I was not in a particularly good mood. Go-ing to check in my luggage (which, for some reason, had become one suitcase with entirely new clothes), I saw hanging
mistletoe.With a considerable degree of irritation
and nowhere else to vent it, I said to the attendant, “Even if I were not married, I would not want to kiss you under such a ghastly mockery of mistletoe.”
“Sir, look more closely at where the mis-tletoe is,” she said.
“OK, I see that it’s above the luggage scale, which is the place you’d have to step forward for a kiss.”
“That’s not why it’s there,” she replied. “It’s there so you can kiss your luggage goodbye.”
Santa’s helpers... You never actually see Santa, only his
“assistants.”Santa keeps his job until he decides to
retire. Santa doesn’t really do the work; he directs a bunch of helpers to do all his work for him, but he’s the one who every-body credits with the work.
Santa doesn’t work anywhere near a 40 hour week. Santa travels a lot.
Yup, Santa works for the government!
Snow plowA blonde driving a car became lost in a
snowstorm. She didn’t panic however, be-
cause she remembered what her dad had once told her.
“If you ever get stuck in a snowstorm, just wait for a snow plow to come by and follow it.”
Sure enough, pretty soon a snow plow
came by, and she started to follow it. She followed the plow for about 45 minutes. Finally the driver of the truck got out and asked her what she was doing. And she explained that her dad had told her if she ever got stuck in a snow storm, to follow a plow.
The driver nodded and said, “Well, I’m done with the Wal-Mart parking lot, do you want to follow me over to Best Buy now?”
Southern NativityIn a small Southern town there was a
Nativity Scene that showed great skill and talent had gone into creating it.
One small feature bothered me. The three wise men were wearing firemen’s helmets.
Totally unable to come up with a reason or explanation, I left. At a “Quick Stop” on the edge of town, I asked the lady behind the counter about the helmets.
She exploded into a rage, yelling at me, “You Yankees never do read the Bible!”
I assured her that I did, but simply couldn’t recall anything about firemen in the Bible. She jerked her Bible from behind the counter and ruffled through some pages, and finally jabbed her finger at a passage.
Sticking it in my face she said, “See, it says right here, ‘The three wise man came from AFIRE.’”
Just for Laughs
19
A COLLEGE DEGREE IS A BEAUTIFUL THINGIf beauty is in the eye of the beholder, then the Army National Guard is the best-looking option for a college degree without a load of debt. Serve part-time, get help paying for school. It’s that simple.
FIND YOUR FUTURE IN THE GUARD
porting suspicious activity at our Muslim neighbors’ townhouse on the chance we might be called racist.
It’s even more regretful that we so eas-ily begin to allude to Christmas in euphe-mism, like the jailbird uncle the family doesn’t talk about — just so we don’t of-fend the ultra-sensitive, politically correct nincompoops.
Christmas Parades are now “Holiday Parades” — with Santa bringing up the rear, of course. It’s not a Christmas tree, it’s a “Holiday Tree” — because we put lights and can-dy canes on a doug-las fir for Boxing Day, right? Street signs and retail market-ing wish us “Happy Holidays” — adorned with Poinsettias, trees and wrapped gifts, presumably to open when the clock strikes midnight on Dec. 31.
I am not offended when my Jewish friends wish me “Happy Hanukkah.” And frankly, I doubt you’re really offended when I wish you a “Merry Christmas.” You want to be offended. You look for things to offend you. And the rest of us acquiesce to your infantile disposition.
Well, throw some more rum in your eggnog and get over yourself.
And whoever’s making the rules on po-litical correctness needs to be taken out
and beaten with a wet reindeer strap — preferably while wearing a Santa hat and being serenaded by carolers singing “Si-lent Night.”
Why are we so afraid of offending others for celebrating the birth of Christ?
The vast majority of this country shouldn’t be held captive to some seman-tic fascism because a small minority of the 20 percent that doesn’t use the c-word is offended by it.
“Separation of church and state,” cry the multicultural weenies. But don’t include
Christmas shopping and the company Christmas party as the “state.” And don’t sit all high and mighty while you embrace the minor Jewish holiday of Hanukkah and the made-up Kwanzaa and can’t ut-ter that c-word. “Cooperative economics” doesn’t beat out “peace on earth, good will toward men.”
The only way to stop this nonsense is to use the c-word freely. Go ahead, try it. Throw it out there willy-nilly — no one’s really offended.
Besides, that’s the “holiday” we’re all talking about. We shouldn’t shy away from it, and we shouldn’t let society shy away from it either.
CHRISTMASContinued from Page 1
“Throw some more rum in your eggnog and get over yourself.”
Christmas morningOn Christmas morning, a police on
horseback had stop for a while. A kid was beside him and the police said
“Did Santa give you that bicycle.” The kid said yes.
Then the police man said “Next time tell Santa to put a taillight on it.” He gave the kid a ticket fined $20.
Before the police left, the kid asked “Did Santa give you the horse?” The police, jok-ing, said yes.
Then the kid said “Next time, tell Santa to put the ass on the back of the horse, not on top.”
Dads and toysWhile I was working as a store Santa, a
boy asked me for an electric train set. “If you get your train,” I told him, “your
dad is going to want to play with it too. Is that all right?”
The boy became very quiet. So, moving the conversation along, I
asked, “What else would you like Santa to bring you?”
He promptly replied, “Another train.”
Little Johnny’s gift exchangeLittle Johnny’s teacher prompted the
class to fill in the blank: “At Christmas, we exchange gifts with ____.”
He raised his hand and said, “Receipts!”
Cookies for SantaAs we were putting out cookies for
Santa on Christmas Eve, I accidentally dropped one.
“No problem,” I said, picking it up and dusting it off before placing it back on the plate.
“You can’t do that!” argued my 4-year-old.
“Don’t worry,” I said. “Santa will never know.”
He shot me a look, “So, he knows if you’ve been bad or good, but he doesn’t know the cookie fell on the floor?”
Gift of the Magi?Last Christmas, I told my girlfriend that
all I wanted was an Xbox. That’s it. Begin-ning and end of the list: Xbox.
You know what she got me? A home-made frame with a picture of us from our first date.
That’s OK, because I got her an Xbox.
Honest questionsTwo kids are on their way to Sunday
school when one says to the other, “What do you think about this Satan stuff?”
“Well, you remember Santa?” the kid re-plies. “This could turn out to be your dad, too!”
Early Christmas shoppingIt was Christmas and a judge was in a
merry mood. He asked a prisoner stand-ing before him, “What are you charged with?”
“Doing my Christmas shopping early”, replied the defendant.
“That’s no offense”, said the judge. “How early were you doing this shopping?”
“Before the store opened.”
20
DISTRIBUTION
The Military Press Newsmagazine is published semi-monthly on the 1st and the 15th by Military Press Newspaper, a commercial, free-enterprise newspaper. It does not neces-sarily reflect the opinion of the Department of the Navy and is no way associated with the Department of the Navy. The editorial objective of the Military Press is to promote support for a strong military presence. The opinions and views of the writers whose materials appear herein are those of the writers and not the publisher. Appearance of advertising does not constitute endorsement by the Military Press Newspaper. Consumers should make informed decisions when purchasing products and services, and when considering business op-portunities, and research before investing. Subscription by mail is $50 per year to CONUS or FPO addresses.
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ACROSS1. Roman cloaks 6. Again 10. False god 14. Absurd 15. Hubs 16. No 17. Mystifying 19. 8 bits of data 20. Lose validity 21. Dip lightly 22. Stink 23. Burn with hot water 25. Curves 26. Shrub 30. Persons 32. Pacify 35. Chart showing routes and streets 39. Race track 40. American songbird 41. Patella 43. Lithesome 44. Mask 46. Eccentric person 47. Lit to a higher degree 50. Speech defects 53. Buttocks 54. Altitude (abbrev.) 55. Artists’ workstands 60. Falafel bread 61. Someone who is paralyzed 63. Arab chieftain 64. Auspices 65. Leaf opening 66. Declare untrue 67. Pack of playing cards 68. Something of value
DOWN1. An indefinite period 2. Chalcedony 3. Sharp intake of breath
4. Against 5. Clairvoyants 6. Former boxing champ 7. Noggin 8. S. American country 9. Tuft 10. Mating of related people 11. Elder 12. Chose 13. Scallions18. Record (abbrev.) 24. Copy
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45. Azotic 47. Increased 48. Choice 49. Language of ancient Rome 51. Liveliness 52. Chip dip 54. Copied 56. Collections 57. Prima donna problems 58. Citrus fruit 59. Leave in a hurry 62. Request
This week’s solutions:
SUDOKUThe rules to play Sudoku are quite simple. Fill in the
blanks so that each row, each column, and each of the nine 3x3 grids contain one instance of each of the numbers 1
through 9.
PUZZLES
ATM_SWH_P5_1852_MP_R3.indd 8-14-2015 9:56 AMSaved at NonePrinted At Client AT&TMedia Type MagazineLive 9.417” x 11.166”Trim 10.25” x 12”Bleed 10.75” x 12.5”Job Title SWH- The Military Press PrintPubs The Military Press ZoneAd Code None
DEPARTMENT:
APPROVAL:
Art Director Copywriter Acct. Manager Studio Artist Proofreader Traffic Production
Addl. Notes: None
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$300 Credit: Limited-time offers. Each $300 in credits requires a line ported in and an AT&T Next purch. and an elig. trade-in. $100 switcher bill credit + $200 trade-in credit per eligible line. New lines only. Excludes upgrades. May not be combinable w/other discounts/offers/credits. Select locations. AT&T Next: $0 down req’s elig. installment agmt. Down payment may be req’d. Qual. Service: Req’s qual. postpaid voice & data svc. Excludes GoPhone,® Cricket, Lifeline, Residential Wireless & select discounted plans. Restocking: If returned w/in 14 days, up to $35 fee. Deposit: May be req’d. Device Limit: Purch. limit & limit on total no. of financed devices may apply. $100 Switcher Bill Credit: Req’s porting eligible number to AT&T from an eligible carrier (excludes Cricket) and buying a smartphone on AT&T Next in the same transaction. Must be active & in good standing for 45 days. Credit rec’d w/in 90 days. $200 Trade-in Credit: Smartphone trade-in must be in good, working condition, have at minimum a standard $10 buyback value, and meet AT&T Buyback program requirements. If you purchase via att.com, you will be emailed a promo code after eligible purchase ships to complete trade-in and receive $200 trade-in credit. Code expires not less than 30 days after receipt. Trade-in Credit: Provided either as an instant credit or a promotion card. Private label AT&T Promotion Card (“Card”) issued by MetaBank™ or CenterState Bank of Florida, N.A., via a license from Visa U.S.A. Inc. In AT&T-owned stores you will be provided an instant credit to spend that day or a Card. If you do not spend entire instant credit, balance may be used to pay wireless bill or get a Card. At att.com you will get a Card. Cards received in ~3 weeks after receipt of eligible trade-in & validation of condition. Credit & Card may be used only toward purchases of AT&T products & svc. in AT&T-owned retail stores, at att.com, or to pay wireless bill. Card is not redeemable for cash & may not be used for withdrawal at cash-dispensing locations. Expiration date will be printed on front of card and will not be less than 90 days from receipt. Participating dealers provide credit for use at time of trade-in. Dealer credit contains add’l terms & conditions & may only be used at specified dealer. Gen. Wireless Svc. Terms: Subject to Wireless Customer Agmt. Other fees, monthly charges, overage charges & restr’s apply. Offer, terms, fees, restr’s & options subject to change and may be modified, discontinued, or terminated at any time without notice. Coverage & svc. not avail. everywhere. See a participating store or visit att.com/summerbuyback for offer details. Monthly Discount: Service discount applies only to the monthly service charge of qualified plans and not to any other charges. See store for details. Special restrictions may apply. Screen images simulated. ©2015 AT&T Intellectual Property. All rights reserved. AT&T and the Globe logo are registered trademarks of AT&T Intellectual Property. All other marks are the property of their respective owners.
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