ExPECTATION #004

expectation#004

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a r t l i f t i n gf o r d i s a b l e d a r t i s t s

E M I L I O I S G R Ot o d e l a t e f o r a n e w m e a n i n g

A U S T I N K L E O N

Austin Kleon is the New York Times bestselling author of three illustrated books.

"Steal Like An Artist" (Workman, 2012) is a manifesto for creativity in the digital

age; "Show Your Work!" (Workman, 2014) is a guide to sharing creativity and

getting discovered; and "Newspaper Blackout" (Harper Perennial, 2010) is acollection of poetry made by redacting words from newspaper articles with apermanent marker.

His work has been translated into over a dozen languages and featured on NPR’sMorning Edition, PBS Newshour, and in The New York Times and The Wall StreetJournal. New York Magazine called his work “brilliant,” The Atlantic called him“positively one of the most interesting people on the Internet,” and The New Yorkersaid his poems “resurrect the newspaper when everybody else is declaring it dead.”

He speaks about creativity in the digital age for organizations such as Pixar, Google,SXSW, TEDx, and The Economist.

fROM http://austinkleon.com

d e l e t i o n s & I L L U S T R A T E D B O O K S

travel inspiration5 i n s t a g r a m p r o f i l e t o f o l l o w

k i d p r e s i d e n t. . . b e a p a r t y . . .

zanele Muholi

It'sokayto begay

for the blacklesbian

identity

s c a r s a r e y o u...like a sign of pen on peper, they tell stories

t e d m e y e ra n d h i s s o u l a r t w o r k " s c a r r e d f o r l i f e "

k i t c h e n# h a p p y a t h o m e F o r a l l t a s t e ssteal some brilliant idea from restaurants

herbs, flowers& l a d l e s . . .f o r t h e w a l l s

d o g b o w l si n o r d e r

r o l l i n g p i n so v e r h e a d s

p a n t r y f o rw i n e & g l a s s e s

woodenboxes asstools &chandeliers

old pipes &boardsbecomefoldingstools

no postcards but

scrabble'sletters

small papersculptures

hanging fromthe ceiling

How to be reallyheard by others

I guess it's happened to all to do not feel understood by someone, maybe even bysomeone really important. It hurts. It leaves a great sense of frustration andinadequacy. When we try to open our feelings, our thoughts and our ideas to those who wehave close and we understand that the person did not understand we feel anunpleasant emotion and sometime a real pain. I turned, I researched, I read, I asked to grab some advice on "how to talk to beheard." And the result is that we need to improve our communication, above all,

avoid some attitudes. (We can also avoid talking to some people, but this will do for

granted !!!) We should do not talk with1. negativity. Because nobody finds it interesting to hear the small or large problemsof the others. Sharing is important and the support and solidarity are important too,but no one has an unlimited supply. Each of us has his own burden to carry on hisshoulders so we are allowed to complain when we need real support.

2. lies. (obviously, not ?!) Who wants to waste time listening to falsehood ?! I guessnobody.3. exaggerations. There are people who look like "cartoons". Those that reveal anattitude always emphasized, they laugh or they joke about everything, they gesturetoo much, they even use adjectives or epithets very confidential with everyone...Well, this attitude is perceived by anyone who does not live in Disneyland as false.4. excuses. I'm not talking about apologizing after we realized we had made amistake. I'm talking about those people insecure, intimidated and extremelyintroverted, those who are stifled by anything that is not in fact need to apologize.5. judgment. Each of us has the right and the duty to do some evaluations toestimate what to keep and what to remove from our lifes, but valuations shouldremain in place and not have to become ratings. First, because none of us is asimportant as it often likes to think and then because no one is dying to hear whoalways has an opinion on the mouth about something or someone.6. gossip. The curiosity about the lives of other people belongs more or less to all.The gossip is fun, but in reality very harmful in relationships. Think about it, do youtrust those who gossip? I did not. I have no illusions that those who gossip do not doit behind me.

7. questionnaire. Those dialogues where one of the partners is pressing questionafter question and he or she puts under pressure others. It could also be boring. Thebeauty of communication is the exchange. For lessons there are books of every kindand encyclopedias. In this regard, I want to say that even the teachers shouldalways be open and learn from the dialogue with their students. Even at the time ofverification.

If you have not already put in place one or more of these errors there are alsosuggestions to develop or to create the necessary empathy, in the way that someonewould really listen to us.1. honesty. Be clear and direct. Do not use underhanded strategies with the aim tostir the emotions of others and thus to change their behavior. No one forgives whois trying to plagiarize someone.2. authenticity. Be yourself and not imitate anyone. Take from others only what youalready have within you and that you have not yet realized.3. integrity. Not tell good and act bad. Be what you say. Pursue firsthand what youbelieve. Behave as you would like others to behave with you.4. love. And I'm not talking necessarily about romantic love, but that feeling ofaffection and kindness that makes sense to others that we are talking with thembecause we care.

Another key element of communication is, of course, the sound of the voice. I haveread information on the timbre, tone, volume, speed, diaphragm, breathing, vocalcords, air, nose, mouth, tongue... A lot of interesting stuff, but I'm not able to talkabout those things. I leave it to the interested parties the trouble of doing a morethorough search, maybe at some vocal coaches who teach to improve the setting ofthe item and to improve public speaking skills. I imagined these experts only astutors of politicians or important people, but I was wrong because they are availableto anyone.

Finally I want to emphasize the importance of the listener. Effective communicationis only half the job, the rest is "the responsibility of the recipient." And too manytimes people are too focused on themselves. Too many times everyone of us do notgrasp the need to free your mind of prejudices and stereotypes. We can not reallylisten if we interpret the phrases according to our way of thinking. The dialogueonly works as an exchange and if we are imprisoned in a unique way of seeing

things (our way) we will not understand and we will give a sign of stupidity.Sometimes the same sentence spoken by different people reveal intentions, feelings,reasoning with characteristics very distant from each other.To me discover the different points of view is one of the "hard work" most beautifuland exciting in life.

b e y o u r s e l v e s# m a k e y o u r s e l v e s h a p p y 5 ADVISES TO TAKE THE BEST DECISIONS IN YOUR LIFE

If you can’t decide between making a scary big investment or go with the safer,smarter, more affordable option... How you can take the right decision?

The close decisions are the hardest

There are decisions like the extreme ones that usually are easier because youalready know, you have a gut feeling or intuitive answer on straight away. In the bigdecisions you don’t even really need to decide, because the decision has long sincebeen made. Maybe you need courage, but it's something different.

The ones that really get you in a tailspin is when both options appear completelyviable and there are equal pros and cons for each.

Without a doubt, you have to know that the decision making process is an emotionalone.

You can trick yourself into thinking that you're being logical by making a pro/con listfor each option, but emotions drive always everything.

There is something that can help you tobe more relaxed in the decisionalprocess.There are some questions and thoughtthat might help you the next time you findyourself at a decision-making crossroads.You should focus on:

1. What is your goal? If you will get yourgoal how will your life change?

2. What is your deciding factor (people?

money? ...) and why is it so important?

3. What are you resisting/holding backfrom? Is it a real problem? How can youresolve that problem?

4. What are you afraid of? Is thereanybody who can help you?

5. If you could be sure of not fail whatwould you do? Which decision wouldmake you happy?

As said before, you have no control overthe outcome. All you can do is make thedecision and then continue makingdecisions as the outcome unfolds.Everything seems like a good decision atthe time and if it wasn't... well, there isalways a way to fix something thatdoesn’t work out.

Take action. Do something.

Don’t let fear get in your way and holdyou back from being your awesome self.Just make a choice and, if you don’t likeit, change it in the best way you can.

AM