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Adult Psychological Development and Spiritual Maturity Part I

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+Learning Goals

n (1) Discover new ways of thinking about spiritual growth, spiritual direction, and the experience of faith as understood developmentally

n (2) Basic grasp of Robert Kegan’s Constructive Development theory

n (3) Begin to identify the implications of adult development for your spiritual life and your ministry as spiritual directors

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+Prayer: “As Kingfishers catch fire…”

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+What does it mean to “selve oneself”?

n Adult development… What does it mean? n Associations? n Assumptions?n Metaphors?

n What connections might you see or anticipate between adult psychological development and spiritual growth?

n 2 minutes to free write and three to share with a partner

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+Nature & GracePresuppositions about biology, psychology, and theology

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+Your brain, your brain ”on God"

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+Relating (Neuroscience), Psychology to Theologyn A mutually critical, co-relational relationship between

science/social science and theology

n Neither “epistemic lens” can be reduced to the other

n Psychological development provides capacity for deeper spiritual maturation, but psychology does not entirely determine what spiritual maturity is.

n Holiness can happen at any stage of development, but will look distinct from stage to stage

n No theory (or set of theories), psychological or theological can ever capture the reality/mystery of what it means to be a human in relationship to God

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+Models of Adult Development: Partial PerspectivesPsycho-Social , Moral, Ego, Women’s Ethic of Care, Constructive Development…

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+The Psycho-Social Model: Erickson

n Relating the self to society

n Social expectations/individual fitness

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+Erikson’s Psycho-Social Model

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+Kolhberg’s Moral Development Model

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+Loevinger’s Ego Development Model

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+Kegan’s Constructive Development Theory: the evolution of consciousness

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n Stage 1: Impulsive Mind

n Stage 2: Instrumental Mind

n Stage 3: Socialized Mind

n Stage 4: Self-Authoring Mind

n Stage 5: Self-Transforming Mind

+ The Evolving Self & In Over Our Heads: the mental demands of everyday life

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+How does this change happen? The Subject/Object relationship

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+Q. How does the change happen? A. The “subject-object move”

n The subject/object relationship (impulses, needs, desires, social relationships, personal agency, one’s own sense of identity/self-authorship, etc.), i.e., what was subject (me) is now object (it)

n Examples: in adolescence, I “am” my peer group and they are me. Later in life, I “have” relationships.

n In early adulthood, we identify with our abilities, our strengths, our skills. Later in life, I have these, but now they are more like tools in a tool box.

n In middle adulthood, I identify with my plans, my goals, my achievements, my self-generated world view. Later, these plans, achievements, and goals are seen to be partial, and I long for a greater sense of purpose and connectedness…

+Development Growth Moves in the Direction of Increasing Complexity

Dualistic thinking (either/or) Dialectical thinking (both/and)

+Constructive-Developmental Theory(Kegan, 1982, 1994)

n Person as Meaning Maker

n Development occurs on the basis of the Subject/Object distinction; growth in cognitive complexity

n Growth from stage to stage is driven by the alternating need/desire for agency or communion

n Supports & Challenges (Holding Environment) for Growth vary (example)

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+Clarifying Questions?15 min

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+Ways of KnowingDevelopmental Lenses for the Ways We Perceive and Make Meaning of Our Experience

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+Constructive Developmental Theory (Kegan, 1982) & Ways of Knowing (Drago-Severson, 2004)

n Based on three central premises:(1) Constructivism (2) Developmentalism(3) Subject - Object Relationship (e.g.)

n A Way of Knowing (Drago-Severson, 2004)shapes all aspects of identity & experience acrossmultiple domains

n 4 Ways of Knowing found in adulthood: Instrumental Knower; Socialized Knower; Self-Authoring Knower; Self-Transforming Knower

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+ Vertical Growth: Transcending and Including previous stages

n Expands options for how I make sense of experience

n Expands capacity for complexity

n Expands range of behaviors in response to challenges

n Expands ability to handle uncertainty

n Expands mental complexity and emotional intelligence

Vertical Development =Self-Transformation (Mindsets)

Each Stage Transcends and Includes what comes before

+Instrumental Knowers (Stages 2-2/3):

n The Golden Rule: “I’ll do to you what you do to me”

n “Rule-Bound Self” (Drago-Severson, 2007)

n Others are helpers or obstacles

n Reliance on rules, the “right” way/avoiding punishment

n Limited capacity for abstract thinking

n Orienting Concerns: fear/reward/self gainn E.g. Spiritual Direction/Ministry

n Supports and Challenges for Growth

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+ Socializing Knowers: (Stages 3, 3/4)

n “I should do for you what I hope and expect you should do for me”

n “Other-Focused Self” (Drago-Severson, 2007)

n Self can think abstractly

n Defined by important others’ & society’s expectations

n Acceptance & approval are primary; conformity to social norms

n Orients to inner states; feels responsible for other people’s feelings

n Orienting Concerns: abstract psychological consequencesn E.g., Spiritual Direction/Ministryn Supports and Challenges for Growth

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+ Self-Authoring Knowers: (Stages 4, 4/5)n “Doing for each other supports each of us in

meeting our own self-defined values, ideals, and goals and assists in preserving the social order”

n “Reflective Self” (Drago-Severson, 2007)

n Self generates own values & standards; relies on internal authority

n Capacity for healthy conflict- give and take

n Self can hold contradictory feelings simultaneously

n Meeting one’s own goals is ultimate; self improvement

n Orienting Concernsn E.g., Spiritual Direction/Ministryn Supports and Challenges for Growth

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From NY Times 06/07

+Self Transforming Knower: (Stage 5, 5/6)“I have the freedom to be myself and to let others be, while at the same time, being open to intimacy with people completely different from me… My own way of being is partial and incomplete without relationship with the other… my becoming is constantly evolving, looping back on itself, and changing.”

nA new balance between capacity for agency and communion

nThe“self” system is an object available for attention and constant discernment…the“fourth person” perspective.

nDark sides: Power/despair

nOrienting concerns:n E.g., Spiritual Direction/Ministryn Supports and Challenges for Growth

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+ Summary of Developmental Movements…

n A progression from the simple to the complex

n From an external orientation to an inner one

n From absolutism and certitude to increasing tolerance for ambiguity and the unknown

n From tendency to rely on “out groups” and stereotypical thinking to increasing awareness of individual differences and greater empathy with others

n From a posture of conformity to group norms toward mature inter-dependence

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+Stages of Faith and Spiritual MaturationApplying Adult Development Theory to Spiritual Growth

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+Stages Theories of Adult Development

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+Religious “state” experience/Developmental stage

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+Romans 12:2

n“Be renewed by the transformation of your mind, so that you may discern what is the will of God, what is good, pleasing, and perfect”

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+Matthew 9:17

n“Neither do people pour new wine into old wineskins. If they do, the skins will burst; the wine will run out and the skins will be ruined. No, they pour new wine into new wineskins, and both are preserved.”

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+Philippians 2:5

n“Have the same mind in you that was in Christ Jesus…”

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+How the Spiritual Exercises can support adult developmentn The Spir Ex as a vehicle for growth toward self-

authoring subjectivity; “self as object”

n Jesus as “evolutionary pacer,” and “transitional object”

n The Examen as a tool for broadening and deepening self-awareness

n The Call of the King/The Two Standards: progressive growth in interior freedom through love for Jesus

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+How the Spiritual Exercises can support adult development

n Contemplation “de-centers” the self; shifts perspective

n The attention to the affective dimension of experience facilitates deeper appropriation of grace

n Use of physical gestures and bodily postures: somatic integration

n Scaffolding for emotional and psychological resilience

n Motivation beyond comfort zone

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+How the Spiritual Exercises can support adult development

n God illuminates dissonance and contradiction, moving us in the direction of greater integrity and wholeness

n Grace helps us move beyond our defenses and our finite identifications/attachments

n Ignatius’ description of humildad amoroso and reverence are characteristic of the level of ego maturity in later stages of development

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+How the Spiritual Exercises can support adult development

n Conversion is a dynamic, painful process of being disembedded from “sinful” habits and attachments

n Evolution involves personal reflection, interior differentiation of attachments from one’s ego, intentional and conscientious assimilation of Christ’s values and re-integration

n Rules for Discernment are instructive about the nature of psychological defenses, the nature of the self in dynamic equilibrium

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+How have I matured in grace and spirit?

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+Consider unfolding images of God

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+And of Jesus…

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+1:1 Pair Reflection (10 minutes)

n How do you understand “grace” in your own life and development?

nFrom your experience, what is the effect of grace in the lives of your directees?

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+Why Do Ways Of Knowing Matter in Spiritual Direction Relationships?

n Implications for working with adults and each other:n Differing expectations on both sidesn ”Discrete/discerning charity”n Needing different supports & challenges

n In any spiritual/religious community, there will be developmental diversity…

n Spiritual directors as part of a robust“Holding Environment”

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+What is a “Holding Environment?”

n The context in and out of which we grow

n 3 Functions : Support; Challenge: Stability

n How might understanding this help you in pastoral relationships?n Importance of meeting people where they are

and providing both supports and challenges to facilitate development (Drago-Severson, 2004)

n Demands sometimes outpace our capacitiesn The need for supervision

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The Spiritual Direction Relationship

Way of Knowing Expectations of SD’s Practical Supports

Instrumental Directors know what the right goals and methods are & should tell me what they are.

Give Instrumental Knowers goals, practices & step-by-step process for achieving them.

Socializing Directors know the bestgoals for me, out of many possibilities. I expect that the director will help reinforce conventional values and ways of being spiritual or religious

Socializing Knowers do generate some goals internally. If voiced, supervisors should acknowledge them as goals that they shouldpursue.

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The Spiritual Direction Relationship

Way of Knowing Expectations of SD’s Practical Supports

Self-Authoring Having appropriated the authority of their personal experience, they expect directors to engage in dialogue and to offer additional perspectives for consideration.

Offer feedback & alternate perspectives and engage in joint inquiry around experience.

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The Spiritual Direction Relationship

Way of Knowing Expectations of SD’s Practical Supports

Transforming Directee hopes that the director will be a companion into the mystery of their deepening relationship and intimacy with self, other, and God.

The director can be present to the directee as they explore more profoundly the paradoxes of life, and the many tensions that are generated by inner contradictions.

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+Questions for reflection and sharing…

nYour experience: What resonates with you about what you have heard? What do you find yourself resisting? What questions are stirring for you?

nYour experience of others: What connections do you make between what you have heard and your work as a spiritual director?

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The developmental perspective and spiritual growth… A summary

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God as ultimate holding environment…

“What the eyes sees more clearly, the heart feels more deeply,” –Bob Kegan

Spiritual emergencies: the perils and opportunities of crises- growth is possible

A new way of thinking about the process of spiritual liberation:-Growth through emergence from embeddedness…-What was subject now is, through grace and nature,available for our attention and discernment…

+Teilhard de Chardin, S.J.Trust in the Slow Work of God. Above all, trust in the slow work of God. We are quite naturally impatient in everything to reach the end without delay. We should like to skip the intermediate stages. We are impatient of being on the way to something unknown, something new. And yet it is the law of all progress that it is made by passing through some stages of instability and that it may take a very long time. And so I think it is with you. Your ideas mature gradually – let them grow, let them shape themselves, without undue haste.

Don’t try to force them on, as though you could be today what time (that is to say, grace and circumstances acting on your own good will) will make of you tomorrow. Only God could say what this new spirit gradually forming within you will be. Give Our Lord the benefit of believing that his hand is leading you, and accept the anxiety of feeling yourself in suspense and incomplete.

Trust in the slow work of God in all the seasons of life

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+Sources and Further Reading

n Stages of Faith, by James Fowler

n The Evolving Self, by Robert Kegan

n In Over Our Heads, by Robert Kegan

n Changing Life Patterns, by Elizabeth Liebert

n Integral Spirituality, by Ken Wilber

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+Thank you!David McCallum, S.J., Ed.DLe Moyne Collegedavidmccallumsj@gmail.com

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