CHRISTIAN COURTSHIP AND MARRIAGE

CHRISTIAN COURTSHIP AND MARRIAGE

Genesis 24:1-67

Genesis 2:18 And the LORD God said, It is not good that the man should be alone; I

will make him an help meet for him.

Time to pray is now!

FINDING A TRUE LIFE PARTNER

Genesis 24:1-67

Wrong Reasons for Wanting to get married

SexDisappointmentGetting evenEscape from parentsPregnancyMoneyetc

Right Reasons for Wanting to get married

LOVELoneliness-companionshipMaturityProcreationGod’s purpose

Remember• To be single is a privilege• Maximize your singlehood• Not everybody will marry in this life e.g. Elijah, Elisha, John the

Baptist, Paul the Apostle, e.t.c.• Marriage is a privilege also ordained by God as the first institution or

ordinance• Before Marriage the following are necessary:a. Physical maturityb. Mental maturityc. Spiritual maturityd. Financial maturitye. Educational maturity

You wont be young forever!The flower of your age!

First miss India in 1947

NOW!

Apart from your decision to accept Christ, this is the most crucial decision of your life!

About 80% of your chance of going to heaven and of being successful in life depends on your

life partner!

Most modern day marriages end in divorce!

A good marriage and a successful marriage contrasted

The mystery of the ribThe rib bone is one of the few bones mentioned by name in

Scripture. Genesis 2:20b–22 states, “But for Adam there was not found a helper comparable to him. And the LORD God caused a deep sleep to fall on Adam, and he slept; and He took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh in its place. Then the rib which the LORD God had taken from man He made into a woman, and He brought her to the man.”

Matthew Henry states, “That the woman was made of a rib out of the side of Adam; not made out of his head to rule over him, nor out of his feet to be trampled upon by him, but out of his side to be equal with him, under his arm to be protected, and near his heart to be beloved.

Isaiah 34:16Look in the scroll of the LORD and

read: None of these will be missing, not one will lack her mate.

For it is his mouth that has given the order, and his Spirit will gather

them together

A True Life partner Belong to same faith: Vs 3-4 cf 2Cor. 6:14-18There must be a finding: vs 10 cf Prov. 18:22; 31:10Must be obtained prayerfully and meditatively:

vs12, 63Must be obtained in the way of righteousness: vs 16Should be with parental approval: vs 3Must be a willing partner: vs 57-58Must be someone you truly love: vs 67

Qualities of a good suitor

• Maturity• Love for God• Love for you• Love for others-be kind to all!• Character(the content not the container) & Habits• Diligence• Vision(lack of vision leads to materialism and mundane considerations)-faith!

Knowing your true Life Partner Genesis 2:21 ¶ And the LORD God caused a deep sleep to fall upon Adam, and he slept and he

took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh instead thereof; 22 And the rib, which the LORD God had taken from man, made he a woman, and brought her

unto the man. 23 And Adam said This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh: she shall be called

Woman, because she was taken out of Man. 24 Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and

they shall be one flesh

Love(Genesis 2:24)Intuition-”the still small voice”(1Kgs 19:11-12)Peace(Phil. 4:6-7)Confirmations through others(2Cor. 13:1)Others-dreams, visions, prophecies, etc

Proposing

• Consult your pastor and/or an elder• Be natural• Be sensitive• Avoid distractions• Do not sound ambiguous• Say exactly what you want!• The worse you will get is a No!• Don't assume you are in a relationship!

Responding

Prayerfully Promptly

No perfect partner!

Courtship• Different from dating• A time between saying “yes” and the wedding day• Things to do together-prayer, Bible study, witnessing, church,

social gatherings, cell group meetings, etc• Get to know each other well enough• Don't pretend-a time to quarrel!• Get to know each other’s families• Holiness-2Tim. 2:22; 1Tim. 5:1-2-Avoid sex and its younger

brothers!• Forgiving the past! Everyone has a past!• Don't court forever!

Pre-marital sex forbidden

1 Corinthians 6:9 Do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived. Neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor homosexuals, nor sodomites,10 Nor cheats (swindlers and thieves), nor greedy graspers, nor drunkards, nor foulmouthed revilers and slanderers, nor extortioners and robbers will inherit or have any share in the kingdom of God.

1Co 6:18 Flee fornication. Every sin that a man doeth is without the body; but he that committeth fornication sinneth against his own body.

1 Corinthians 10:8 We should not commit sexual immorality, as some of them did- and in one day twenty-three thousand of them died.

Duration of Courtship

o No hard and fast rules!o Not too long and not too short!o But must have a wedding date plan in mind

The Wedding

• Types of weddings/marriages• Choosing a date• Financial prudence-Dont waste money!• Good organisation• The “Saturday”• The honey moon

Make your wedding as simple as possible!

Its your Day!

Satan has vowed to destroy Christian homes and families! Rev. 12:12 Therefore rejoice ye heavens, and ye that dwell in them.

Woe to the inhabiters of the earth and of the sea! for the devil is come down unto you, having great wrath, because he knoweth

that he hath but a short time. 13 And when the dragon saw that he was cast unto the earth, he

persecuted the woman which brought forth the man child. 14 And to the woman were given two wings of a great eagle, that

she might fly into the wilderness, into her place, where she is nourished for a time, and times, and half a time, from the face of

the serpent. 15 And the serpent cast out of his mouth water as a flood after the

woman, that he might cause her to be carried away of the flood. 16 And the earth helped the woman, and the earth opened her

mouth, and swallowed up the flood which the dragon cast out of his mouth.

17 And the dragon was wroth with the woman, and went to make war with the remnant of her seed, which keep the commandments

of God, and have the testimony of Jesus Christ

2Tim. 3:1 This know also, that in the last days perilous times shall come

2 For men shall be lovers of their own selves, covetous, boasters, proud, blasphemers,

disobedient to parents, unthankful, unholy, 3 Without natural affection, trucebreakers,

false accusers, incontinent, fierce, despisers of those that are good,

4 Traitors, heady, highminded lovers of pleasures more than lovers of God;

5 Having a form of godliness, but denying the power thereof: from such turn away

The Christian home and family like Christ and the Church!Ephesians 5:31 For this cause shall a man leave his

father and mother, and shall be joined unto his wife, and they two shall be one flesh.

32 This is a great mystery: but I speak concerning Christ and the church.

33 Nevertheless let every one of you in particular so love his wife even as himself; and the wife see that

she reverence her husband.

A message for Families

The unsaved spouse and childrenThe Family altarUnending love

Another Life

The real life beginsAdjustments and ReadjustmentsIn-lawsChildrenMinistryThe error of Eli-1Samuel 2:21-26

All will be well•God has made every provision for your success in marriage