By Connie Saindon, MFT Founder and Director Since-1998

By Connie Saindon, MFTFounder and Director

Since-1998

Where does one go…?

When the worst has happened?When someone you love has been murdered or died

in a violent way?When first responders leave?Who knows and understands?

Our Logo… (story on our website at www.svlp.org)

Why our program….?We are there when others leave…We are the only program in San Diego County, as

well as one of the few in the Nation to provide specialized violent services after Violent Death.

We are trained in the kind of grief that does not go away with time.

We offer opportunities for Survivors to be with each other.

We can provide information on other adjunct providers and agencies.

Our approach includes lessons from survivors.

Our Mission

“Your support is our mission” to

“ Provide a Lifeline of Hope and Healing”

and Build a community of support

CS/02

NationallyNationally

50,000 violent deaths annually50,000 violent deaths annually

plusplus

10-12 additional “10-12 additional “co-victims”co-victims”

(doesn’t count DUI, terrorist fatalities and war)

Co-Victims DefinedCo-Victims Defined

The term “co-victim” was created due to a lack of recognition for the needs of survivors, and therefore were underserved.

Office of Victims of Crime Bulletin, August 1998

This department provided funds to train other cities in 1998.

• You become a member of a club you never wanted to join.

• You have paid the highest dues.• You have a lifetime membership.

C. S.

THE NEED IN SAN DIEGO111 Homicides 370 Suicides (SANDAG)115 Drunk Driving Fatalities (MADD)

Twelve people significantly impacted = 7,152 each year

Statistics provided by: San Diego County Sheriffs Department, 2007, San Diego Community

Health Improvement Partners and MADD 2006.

Survivor quote…

“No one understands the magnitude of this. You end up a body with no life in it.”

Co-Victim of Homicide, 1998

Multiple Levels of Complexity

MurderSuicideDUI fatalityShaken baby deathGang killingTerrorist fatalityMurder/suicide

No bodyMultiple suspects/trialsFirst arrest-26 years

after deathNo suspectHappened in another

stateKiller found not guiltyMore…

Multiple Players and Roles

DetectivesParamedics/EMT’sMedical ExaminersMediaVictim AdvocatesClean up Services

District AttorneyEmployers/SchoolsReligious/SpiritualMorticiansCemeteriesSecurity

Unnatural Death is Different Violent

A Violation- a wrong doing

Volitional-on purpose

Voyeuristic- private becomes public

Three basic Assumptions may be shatteredshattered following trauma:

The World is SafeLife has MeaningI have worth

Shattered Assumptions by Ronnie Bulman-Janoff , 1992

A survivor said it well with this cartoon of what if feels to be her…

MeUnplugged

fromLIFE

Another survivors said: “Life is like a Dali painting”

Impact of loss is incomprehensible!

The complexity and competing aspects of each loss can easily overwhelm the family, the community and service professionals who all work to regain a sense of safety, meaning and hope.

Additional Stressors

Reconciling how loved one diedThreat(s) may continue to exist Media making public what was privateCrime Scene DemandsVictim IdentificationMedical Exam requirementsLegal imperativesSecurityProbate

Second Wounds….When co-victims are blamed for not preventing what

happened

When the legal system does not give them a role

Courts seem to treat criminals better than victims

When family members are treated and considered suspects

Wounds

The pain of homicide bereavement (and other violent deaths) is described as intense, unprecedented, and inescapable.

The response of the community to survivors is often so inadequate that it has been called ‘‘secondary victimization’’.

Amick-McMullan, Kilpatrick, & Veronen, 1989. 1991; Getzel & Masters,

1984; Redmond, 1989; Rynearson, 1984; Sprang, McNeil, & Wright, 1989; Spungen, 1998

Normal reactions…Can be:Being possessed with

what has happenedCompulsive care-

givingCompulsive inquiry

SVLP founder and sister “Tiny"

To abnormal events

“It will bring you to your knees;” says a father whose daughter who was killed.

Clinical picture may includePTSD; experiences of intrusive reenactment and

avoidance.

Major Depression, DX not given until 2 mo. After loss.

Traumatic Grief/ Complicated Bereavement.

Victimization; rage and a sense of defilement .

Compulsive inquiry; a social and psychological need for investigation and punishment of the murderer.

It is the malicious intent in It is the malicious intent in deaths such as homicide and deaths such as homicide and terrorism that increase stressorsterrorism that increase stressors

9/11 Study9/11 StudySample size N=2,752Sample size N=2,752

11% - PTSD37% - mild-moderate PTSD symptoms51% - evidenced resilient outcomes with 1-0 PTSD

symptoms

Problem with the study: relied on phone interviews for diagnosis

(Galea, Ahearn, Resnick et. , al. 2002)

BEGS for further research

Veterans with PTSD are more likely to have heart attacks years later

Medical authorities first accepted PTSD as a psychiatric condition in 1980 at the urging of Vietnam Vets

This new study is the first to link PTSD with health problems 10-15 years later

Laura Kubzansky, Harvard, 2007

Theory

Separation distress occurs as a result of the loss of a loved one as understood by attachment theory

Trauma Distress which relates more to how someone died

Re-membering loved ones: Memento Box

The ChallengesThe Challenges1. Help deal with the loss of your loved

one and your longing for reunion.

2. Help you get past revenge and re-enactment imagery that is intrusive.

3. Foster your ability to self-soothe to help contain overwhelming emotions.

4. Navigate the many competing complexities

Survivors Club Survivors Club

Co-victim volunteers who have become Survivors and part of the team to help others

Open to all participants who are members of a club they never wanted to be a member of

Survivors Club Survivors Club

Activities include:

Candle Light vigilHoliday Memorial, 5K Walks/Light the Night Against CrimeTree Planting/Crime Victims Oak Garden Potlucks & PicnicsFundraising

Candlelight Vigil – Crime Victims Week

Victim Assistance Coordinating Council

Tree planting at the Crime Victims Oak Garden

Fundraiser car wash for the Homicide Support Project

Annual Holiday Memorial

Tenth Anniversary, 2008

Annual River of Remembrance

UCSD Appreciation DinnerVolunteers and Staff

Community of Supporth has included…District Attorney, Bonnie DumanisCynthia Charlebois, Director Victim/Assistance Lt. Tom Bennett, SD Co. SheriffMichelle Del Conte, San Felipe FoundationJoyce Knott, Cara Knott FoundationJim and Wilma Knott, Crime Victims Oak

GardenVictim Assistance Coordinating Council Parents of Murdered Children

Paula Myers, MADDSurvivors Club MembersAnna Knuth, SDPD-Crisis Intervention TeamWendy Maurer, Ph.D, Red Cross, Disaster

Mental HealthCarmela CalderaYolanda BoydEric & Lisa Hoffacker, www.CarterDesignWorks Elizabeth Munroe, webmaster

Community of Support continued:

People say the darndest things…Do say…

My regrets to you… Their loved ones name Just listen Don’t say you know how they feel unless you too have

lost someone in a violent way

More on our website under Support www.svlp.org

Add yours to our list at svlp@svlp.org

The Journey Ten steps to learning to live with Violent Death:

Adult Survivors Individual workbook kit

& accompanying Calming Exercises CD

Order yours now618-9-685-0005svlp@svlp.org

Upcoming EventsCurrent Postings at

1. http://svlpnetwork.wordpress.com

2. Website http://www.svlp.org

3. Email svlp@svlp.org

4. Or Call 616-685-0005

““Tiny’s” RoleTiny’s” RoleDecember 8, 1961 at age of December 8, 1961 at age of 17, my sister, “Tiny”, the third 17, my sister, “Tiny”, the third child of eight, was murderedchild of eight, was murdered.”.”

Connie SaindonConnie Saindon

Iris is her symbol Iris is her symbol Represents HOPERepresents HOPE