BEST HAIR IN SOCCER

Andy Carroll

BAGGIO’s Dead Animal

Italian legend Roberto Baggio had a ponytail like no other. Frankly, I’m surprised no one ever cut it off thinking he was being attacked by a rabid varmint. The only thing heavier than his hair has to be the weight of missing a PK in the 1994 World Cup final. The best description I’ve heard for his hair is that it looks like a dead animal is clinging to his neck.

CisseHappy St. Patrick’s Day

Andrea Pirl

Benoit Assou-Ekotto- Sideshow Bob

Having already tried braids, cornrows, a full ‘skin head’ and what we’ve pictured here nicknamed Sideshow Bob. In 2013 he’s been going with zig zag braids that turn into a fluffy ponytail in the back. A real nightmare.

Balotelli

Balotelli

Mario Balotelli is a hair stylist’s dream customer. He surely changes it more than any other soccer star. I could easily fill an entire page with all the looks Brand Balotelli has already tried. Personally I like the colors of the Italian flag, but he also has gone blonde, blonde mohawk, spiked and many other designs. 

Glen JohnsonGlen Johnson of England and Liverpool likes corn I guess. For me corn rows look a little silly on an adult. It reminds me of a high school girl that just got back from a Caribbean cruise. If you don’t want to have to mess with your hair just grow some dreadlocks like Bob Marley. Then again David Beckham had corn rows too, but he married Posh Spice so his judgment is obviously questionable.

Carlo Valderrama’s South American RainforestI would argue that no player in the history of football has been more recognized by his hair than Carlos Valderrama. The Columbian has had his iconic hairstyle forever. Even though he is now 51, he was featured in a 2012 commercial with Mario Balotelli. Then in March 2013, Twitter went crazy when it was rumored that he had cut his hair.

Cisse

David Luiz

Marouane Fellainiask Rat Nest

Everett teammate Tim Howard who told Kickette that, “It’s a rat’s nest…but a lovable rat’s nest. Especially when he showers, he gets out and his soaking wet hair is all flat. Gradually it starts growing and takes on a life of its own.”

Taribo West

Looks like he has Snapea Crisps on his head!

Ronaldo

The original Ronaldo with what might be the worst haircut ever. He was so great in the 2002 World Cup that many young Brazilian’s actually got this style as well. I guess one could argue it was a minimalist masterpiece? Not really, that would be the shaven head. There is nothing beautiful about it. He quickly returned to a shaven head. We can only assume he came to his senses. 

Ronaldinho – Soul Glo drenched Jerry Curl no way to go through life.

Ronaldinho has been rocking the same nasty jerry curl forever. I wonder how much Soul Glo he uses on a monthly basis. I certainly wouldn’t want that to hit my face while on the pitch. Probably causes acne. Could you imagine what Joey Barton might do or say if you had to defend Ronaldinho all game? I 

Neymar

The unicorn called and wants its hair back!

Rudi Voller

Somehow German legend, Rudi Voller, thought the curly mullet was a good look. Throw in that mustache and surely no father would ever let his daughter be alone with him. The fact this mullet is so finely permed is outstanding. In the 1990 World Cup Frank Rijkaard and Voller got into it on the pitch. Rijkaard spit in his hair more than once. Hard to blame him as it looks disgusting enough a place.