4 THINGS CONFIDENT PEOPLE DO DIFFERENTLY

BY JEFFERSON SANTOS

I’m going to show you how to harness the most powerful weapon against self-doubt that you have in your

arsenal. I’m not only going to introduce you to this important weapon, I'm going to explain to you how

to use it in the most effective manner possible through four action steps that will help you com-bat that self-doubting voice in your head.

In the end, I expect that you'll be able to deploy this weapon in any situation where self-doubt dares to show itself.

The secret weapon to battling self-doubt is something called self-efficacy.

You’re probably asking, “Jefferson, what in the world is that?”

Self-efficacy is simply the belief in your own ability to succeed in specific situations. It's

the polar opposite of self-doubt and a necessary tool to defeat it.

Needless to say, your ability to tap into your self-efficacy plays a central role in how you approach the goals,

tasks, and challenges in your life. It will literally change your life. How do I know this? Be-

cause it changed mine.

You see, ever since I was a little kid I’ve loved football. I played it fearlessly all throughout my youth and my confidence in my ability never wavered for one moment. Back when I played at the Naval Academy, and then later TCU, I knew and, more importantly, my teams knew that I was the go-to guy to make those tough catches. 

In spite of the poor records of the teams that I was on, I played hard no matter what. And everyone on my

team that played alongside me knew that they could count on me through thick and thin. I didn't let winning

or losing records affect me. I knew that I was doing my best all the time, every time, and

that helped me believe in my abilities even more.

My self-efficacy was the fuel for my engine and it proved to be the difference when I later en-

countered other obstacles in life. I was able to tap into that confidence built up by years of understanding my drive, desire, and work ethic.

THE MOST POWERFUL WEAPON AGAINST SELF-DOUBT IS...

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Healthy, Wealthy, Happy: 4 THINGS CONFIDENT PEOPLE DO DIFFERENTLY

Hey, self-doubts based on your past are always going to come up from time to time, but if you anticipate

them and believe in your ability to overcome them, you've already won the battle.

Dr. Albert Bandura has a great quote on this very subject. He wrote, "In order to succeed, people need a sense of self-efficacy, to struggle together with resilience to meet the inevitable obstacles and inequities of life."

So not only is overcoming self-doubt a good thing, it's a necessary step for you to achieve success in this

life.

Now before continuing, I want to draw a line that distinguishes between confidence and arrogance. The two may seem similar but there is a sharp difference, one that you instantly recognize in other people who exhibit the latter.

Confidence is all about feeling certain in your own belief and abilities. It comes from deep within you and doesn't necessarily need an outlet to prove it exists. You can have a quiet confidence, for ex-

ample.

Arrogance, on the other hand, is an insulting way of thinking and behaving that comes from believing that you are better or smarter or more important than the people around you. This behavior radiates outward and any outward energy that has to manifest itself in comparisons to other people will always rub others the wrong way.

Guard against arrogance because it will always work against you and keep you from achieving any meaningful level of success.

So if we understand what self-efficacy is, how do we develop it?

The secret to achieving it isn't complicated. But like I've highlighted in other articles, it requires you to ob-serve yourself and be honest in your self-assessment. If you live in denial about the bad habits that

you've developed, it's going to be difficult to undo them.

Here are the four crucial steps to develop self-efficacy.

1. MASTER YOUR EXPERIENCESRepetition is the mother of skill. Repeat. Repeat. Repeat. That's how you master something and

get really good at whatever it is you’re doing.

You know this from other parts of your life. The first time you do something, you don't do it well and it takes a

really long time. But as time passes, you get better, faster, and more proficient at doing some-

thing until it eventually becomes second nature.

The key to really getting the process going is to break things down into small doable chunks. This

helps you execute those tasks successfully and increases your self-efficacy.

I've written before about the importance of breaking things down. Too many times we think that we're more effec-tive when we "multi-task". But let me tell you, the more things you take on, the less attention you're paying to those things.

Break it down so you don't lose your focus. Become more efficient, not less.

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2. MODEL SUCCESSFUL PEOPLEThis idea is very important because you’ll learn lots when you model yourself on people who have

been to the top of the mountain.

We all have people in our lives that we admire. They can be lifelong friends or even complete strangers that

we read about. Whoever they are, find out how they live and work successfully and model their be-haviors.

Sometimes we're afraid to do this because we've been conditioned to believe that anything less than being completely unique is a form of cheating. In school, we were told to not look at other people's papers. But what

about looking at their study habits? What about picking up on their note-taking abilities? That’s not cheating, that’s smart!

Remember, if they can do it, so can you. The secret is filtering out the details that are not impor-

tant.

For many years, people were convinced that if anyone were to run a mile in less than four minutes, their hearts would explode! I'm serious. People believed this for decades.

Well along comes this bloke named Roger Bannister who finally broke the four-minute mark and, lo and be-

hold, his heart did not explode. Once he did this remarkable feat that hadn’t been done, tens of thousands of people followed.

All you need is a model that indicates that success is within reach.

So find a mentor, someone who's achieved what you want to do, and model your behavior

on his or hers. Find out what actions worked for them and make those actions work for you.

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Healthy, Wealthy, Happy: 4 THINGS CONFIDENT PEOPLE DO DIFFERENTLY

3. UPGRADE YOUR CICLE OF INFLU-ENCEJim Roland has brought up an interesting concept that I happen to agree with. He cites that "you are going to be-come the five people that you hang around with the most."

This is your circle of influence and all of us should be mindful of the types of people that are a

part of this circle in our lives.

When looking at these people, you have to ask yourself, what are their finances like? What are their emo-tions like? What are their relationships like?

Be sure that whatever indicators you’re looking to model are present in your circle of influence.

I hope that in asking yourself these questions, your current circle is already a positive one. If not, it’s time to upgrade

that circle into one that will steer your life in the right direction.

Since these very important people will influence your life, you'll need to give deep consideration to whom you

want them to be if you want to be changed in a meaningful and positive way.

You are the average of those five people. Make them count.

4. MASTER YOUR EMOTIONSWe all know that we can't perform to the best of our abilities when we're emotionally hurt or even distracted. This

is simply because our mental state can determine how we feel about everything, including our abilities.

When we're vulnerable emotionally, we're vulnerable to negative thoughts. Those thoughts can have no real basis in reality, but this is self-doubt that we've been talking about. It will always look for a way to burrow into your psy-che.

NBA basketball players often talk about the importance of making every free throw and basket they can. But some-times the emotional pressure of playing in front of thousands messes with their minds. Hey, they're human, after all. That’s why they sometimes completely miss a shot. It’s because of something that’s bothering them mentally. Maybe the previous bad play is getting to them or a really bad heckler offended them.

Our lives and minds work much the same way. Emotional distress equals limited perform-ance. Minimize that stress and you're more likely to be successful.

Talk to yourself, but be kind. Don't beat yourself up. Stay positive and master your emo-tions.

Even better, elevate your mood when you face difficult or challenging tasks and you'll improve your self-efficacy in no time!

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Healthy, Wealthy, Happy: 4 THINGS CONFIDENT PEOPLE DO DIFFERENTLY

These are four key steps that will improve your self-efficacy.

Become more efficient at what you do and that self-doubt in your head will grow quieter and quieter.

We know it can never go away (we don't want it to!), but you don't have to let it paralyze you. Remain confident in your own abilities.

I know that many of you are destined for great things and I'm hopeful that by sharing my journey with self-doubt, you can learn from me and incorporate these elements into your life.

I look forward to helping you arrive at your next intended destination healthy, wealthy and happy!

Get more motivation. Follow me on:

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Jefferson Santos grew up in Richardson, Texas and attended Texas Christian University and played football at the Naval Academy. Jefferson is like many entrepreneurs who just decided one day that he wanted to be in charge of his own career. However, at the age of 25 he was $1,100 negative in his bank account, $70,000 in debt and decided he was in need of a change. Through guidance, self-improvement and commitment he turned his dream into a realist. Jefferson is now a multi-million dollar earner and has a team of over 300,000 leaders in 30 countries and it continues to grow every day.

Jefferson’s goal is to help YOU arrive at your intended destination healthy, wealthy and happy.

Follow him on Social Media channels:

Or visit his page:

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

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www.JeffersonSantos.com