ALLOWING OURSELVES TO FEELCOMPASSION AND ACT ON ITDOESNTONLY HELP THE SUBJECTS OFOUR KINDNESS. THERE ARE WELLBEINGBENEFITS FOR ALL—GIVERS, RECIPIENTSAND EVEN WITNESSES. SO JOIN THEKINDNESS REVOLUTION FORA SEROTONIN BOOST

words SUE WHrTE photography PHOTOUBRAR,

'&': I K

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For jono Fisher, it a sighting of a job as amaie nanny that ended up his life towardsa compa >sionate path. "I in a

i lepressed felt i ws s gol :,.i against th« grain ofwhat i to be doing,

"I found a male nanny role and thought I'd try it fora fewmonths. Itturned into three years! I actually discoveredI had time to go for walks and was getting two things Ireally love. I'd simplified my life but I felt really healthy andwealthy at the same time."

As Fisher began to discover his own sense of innerpeace, his thoughts turned to others.The result was WakeUp Sydney!, a "kindness revolution" that aims to plantseeds of compassion and inspiration through semi-regularevents and the engaging pay-it-forward kindness cards.

Holders of the free cards engage in anonymous acts ofkindness, ranging from paying forsomeone's groceriesthrough to delivering a neighboura home-baked cake.The only limit is the giver's imagination. "My inbox isconstantly full of beautiful acts of humanity and notesfrom people scheming on positive acts," Fisher says.

With more than 30,000 Kindness Cards sent out todate, Fisher remains surprised by the interest. "It startedas an experiment, butfrom what I gather, people get

;RS,

surprisingly happy," he says. "You'd expect that from thereceiver, but the givers feel happy, too."

The observation is not Fisher's alone. I n the US filmSerotonin Rising [currently awaiting distribution on thefilm festival circuit], speakers ranging from the spiritual— Deepak Chopra and the Dalai Lama—through to thescientific — researchers at the US National Institutes ofHealth — confirm what Fisher has seen for himself.Thegivers, receivers and even witnesses of compassionateacts receive serotonin boosts.

While scientists continue to find evidence confirmingthe physical, author Miles Roston is more intrigued bythe emotional connection between compassion andwellbeing. "It seemed to me there are ways compassioncan be really healthy but the lives of people like Mandelaand MotherTeresa were actually quite difficult," Rostonsays. "I wondered if people get anything out of beingcompassionate and doing things for others, not in anyafterlife but in this life. I also wanted to find out whatworks and if some things work better than others."

In his resulting book, Making a world of difference (ExilePublishing), Roston interviews people across the worldabout their compassionate acts. The perspectives ofeveryone from a Catholic priest working with dyingBuddhists through to a Hong Kong investment bankerwho has helped thousands of orphaned children gavehim plenty of food forthought, as well as someunderstanding about compassion.

"The first step is being really willing to let yourself beaffected," says Roston. "Most of us don't. We think oncewe see misery we will never come back from that point,so we avoid it.The second point is about really listening tolearn what it is that people actually need, as opposed towhat you think they need."

Roston notes there is plenty of scope for our currentskills to be put to better use in acts of kindness towardsothers. "Whatever skill you have can be really usefulas it is," he says. "I've seen architects who have made adifference in indigenous Australia, and priests who aresimply there for people with H IVwhen they are dying.Both make a real connection through their skills."

If you're working on long-term change, Roston remindsus that things often take far longerthan UN MillenniumGoals or worthy campaigns to rebuild tsunami-affectedareas might imply. "I met a guy in Africa who told me astory that really made me realise how long these thingstake," he says. "He had offered to help a seven-year-oldchild with schooling and getting off the streets.The kidcame back when he was 25 and said I'm ready to go toschool now. Hejoined year nine at age 25 and eventuallybecame a teacher.Things take time."

If there is a silver bullet to be found when dishing out adose of compassion, Roston believes it's the simple act ofencouragement. "I was recently speaking to a woman inThailand who works with a network of teachers helping10,000 kids," he says. "She reminded me that in orderto alleviate poverty you need to deal with a lot of otherthings, too, like self-esteem and encouraging people'sdreams. I think that's why projects like the HomelessWorld Cup have had such success. People are beingencouraged, applauded and made part of a team."

Ultimately, both Roston and Fisher believe that wherewe go wrong is not in a lack of empathy, but in our lack

I of understanding of the kind of world that will actually| make us happy. "Good things are happening, but we are| also patting ourselves on the back a bit too much overall,[ saysAmerican-born Roston. "When theGFChappened,! hundreds of billions of dollars were raised to bail out USi banks. I understand the need to keep our economy going,; butwhat economy do we really value?"

Back in Australia, Fisher agrees that our attentionI is often misplaced. "We're often so busy focusing onI consumer-based living that we miss the benefits andj value of kindness," he says. For compassion to really be' sustainable, he believes we need to close the circle. "It canI start by doing kind things for others, butthefull loop of

the circle comes when you can also be kind to yourself,i Then compassion becomes a natural fuel that can last.'Ei

(Exile Publishing, 2010).LEARN: Homeless World Cup, www.homelessworldcup.org.PAY-IT-FORWARD: Kindness cards and Wake UpSydney? events, wwwwakeupsydney.com,au.

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