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Preface It might be helpful to have a little background on Thai culture regarding this story. It must be understood that Thai culture is “tradition based political structures” that are top down and patriarchal in nature, and, although this is changing; it’s changing very slowly. When describing a good marriage, it is likened to an elephant; with the front legs being the role of the husband and the rear legs being the role of the wife. We of western culture may find this characterization of marriage objectionable; but it sparked the

When Elephants Walked Backwards

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This is chapter 1 from one of my new books. The preface explains the premise of the story. My book is no longer available on Kindle, because I pulled it from distribution because the color illustrations (8 of them) don't look very good because they're not in color on Kindle.

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Page 1: When Elephants Walked Backwards

Preface

It might be helpful to have a little background on

Thai culture regarding this story.  It must be

understood that Thai culture is “tradition based

political structures” that are top down and

patriarchal in nature, and, although this is

changing; it’s changing very slowly.  When

describing a good marriage, it is likened to an

elephant; with the front legs being the role of the

husband and the rear legs being the role of the

wife.

We of western culture may find this

characterization of marriage objectionable; but it

sparked the wag in me to envision an absurd

situation taken to its crazy extreme and back once

again to sanity. I hope you enjoy the story and the

spirit in which it was written.  

Page 2: When Elephants Walked Backwards

I

“Father, Nong told me we used to walk

backwards, is that true?” asked Boy.

“Oui1! Yes, but that was a long time

ago,” replied the father.

“He also said it was because of one of our

relatives.”

“Yes, that’s true too. It was your great,

great grandfather many times removed, his name

was Chang2. This was long before there were

humans in Thailand.”

“Nong said our family isn’t very

intelligent and nobody else in the whole world

1 A Thai word pronounced like Oui in “oui vey”, only said a little sharper and “higher”. Usually said with a sense of surprise.2 “Chang” is the Thai word for elephant. It’s pronounced with a very broad “A” as in ah.

Page 3: When Elephants Walked Backwards

would have been so stupid as to walk

backwards.”

“Well, if you don’t know the whole story

it might look that way.”

“What’s the whole story?”

“I guess this is a good time to tell you.

The story goes like this:”

Once upon a time, a very, very, very, very

long time ago (before there were humans in

Asia), there was a herd of elephants moving

through the jungles of Thailand on their daily

forage for food and a good bath or even better, a

roll in the mud and then a bath. There was

nothing particularly unusual about this herd

because it had the usual personalities you would

find in any herd of elephants. Well, there was

Page 4: When Elephants Walked Backwards

one exception, but he wasn’t really an exception

because you always find an exception in any

normal herd of elephants. Perhaps this is true

even in a herd of African elephants. As everyone

knows, they are very touchy. I think it’s their

large ears. They are very sensitive to noise and

get very grumpy when disturbed, whereas Indian

elephants are very peaceful (they have smaller

ears). Thai elephants are Indian elephants but

don’t tell them that because it would upset them;

they think they are Thai, which of course they

are, but it’s been a long time since they moved to

Thailand so they have forgotten about India.

Anyway, on this particular day, there was a herd

of Thai elephants and the exception (his name is

Chang) started to argue with himself. Actually

Page 5: When Elephants Walked Backwards

he wasn’t arguing with himself exactly, it was the

rear legs being upset with the front legs and

starting an argument. You might guess this

caused quite a problem, which it did.

It all started when the front legs turned to

go to the river for a bath and the rear legs kept

going straight for the mud pit. Chang started to

zigzag, walk sideways and go in circles. He

crashed into everything in sight. Finally, he sat

down and

asked his legs what the heck was going on? The

front legs said they wanted a bath in the river and

the rear legs said they

wanted to go to the mud pit and have a roll in the

mud. Chang was hungry and wanted to eat.

Page 6: When Elephants Walked Backwards

Well, then the argument really got started.

The rear legs whined that they always had to go

where the front legs wanted to go, they were tired

of always having to follow the front legs, and

besides that, they wanted to lead. The front legs

got very huffy and said “Well, it’s not my fault

you’re the back legs and I’m the front legs. We

were born this way and there’s nothing to be

done about that”. “Oh yeah!” cried the rear legs,

“I’m not moving until I get to lead!” Chang got

very worried at this point. Without his legs

working together he couldn’t go anywhere, how

was he going to eat, drink, and stay with the

herd? Not only that, how could the rear legs

possibly lead? He couldn’t very well walk

backwards, could he? I mean, he has to see

Page 7: When Elephants Walked Backwards

where he’s going, doesn’t he? As if this wasn’t

enough, the legs of each of the elephants in the

rest of the herd realized what was going on and

started to argue also. The whole herd was

crashing around hither and yon through the

jungle. As you may imagine, it was quite a sight.

Chang pleaded and tried to humor his legs

but the rear legs would hear none of it and

refused to move. The front legs said they

wouldn’t move again until the rear legs

apologized for being stupid and stubborn. Chang

said “Oui!” and gave up.

So, there sat Chang. The rest of the herd

had finally stopped and sat down where ever they

were when their legs gave out.

Poor Chang! The rest of the herd was

Page 8: When Elephants Walked Backwards
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very angry with him because they said this was

all his fault and they demanded he find a solution

and it had better be quick!

Chang thought and thought and thought.

He got a headache from all this thinking.

What to do, what to do...Oui! There seemed only

one thing to do, let the rear legs lead the way and

see what happens. When Chang informed the

legs of his decision, the front legs gasped,

“What?”

“That’s the way it’s going to be, otherwise, we

stay here until we starve to death. Okay?”

“This is crazy!” pleaded the front legs.

But they realized they had no choice. The rear

legs absolutely refused to move unless they got

their way. When the rest of the herd found out

Page 10: When Elephants Walked Backwards

Chang’s decision, they started trumpeting and

yelling that this was the craziest thing they had

ever heard and thereby created the largest ruckus

any one in the jungle could remember. But,

finally, they too agreed.

Well, as anyone who knows jungles

knows, the news spread in a matter of minutes.

Far and wide every animal in the jungle knew the

elephants in Chang’s herd

would be walking backwards and so they ran,

galloped, flew, crawled, hopped and

swung through the trees to watch the herd.

Chang was the first one to move. He got

up and started to walk. It was very awkward at

first, not to mention looking completely

ridiculous. The front legs were very grumpy but

Page 11: When Elephants Walked Backwards

begrudgingly followed the back legs as they

immediately walked into the first tree, stumbled

and fell down with a huge thump. A number of

small jungle creatures fled for their lives as

Chang fell down. Chang groaned and the front

legs made some very rude comments about the

rear legs. The rear legs sheepishly said they had

to get the hang of this new way of walking. The

rest of the herd wasn’t doing any better. The

noise of 50 elephants crashing around in the

jungle could be heard 10 kilometers away.

Fortunately everybody was exhausted after only a

few minutes as there was a real danger of major

damage to the jungle; trees and plants were going

down everywhere. Luckily most of the other

Page 12: When Elephants Walked Backwards

animals that came to see this spectacle kept their

distance.

One by one the elephants got up and

slowly started to walk again. Nobody in history

had ever seen such a sight: 50 elephants walking

backwards through the jungle. The other animals

couldn’t contain themselves any longer and fell

down laughing hysterically. Even the monkeys

lost their grip and fell out of the trees. The

cobras laughed and hissed, “That’ssssss the

ssssssilliest thing I’ve ever sssssseen!” No one

had ever seen cobras laugh before. The tigers

had completely lost it and were rolling on the

ground laughing. It was almost too much to bear.

By the next day everyone’s coordination

was improving. Very few trees got knocked

Page 13: When Elephants Walked Backwards

down. Butts and tales were feeling bruised and

sore. And yes, the front legs were still

complaining but mostly under their breath. As

the day passed, the rest of the jungle animals

were starting to get bored and slowly went back

to their normal lives, though as you might expect,

this continued as a major source of gossip for

weeks.

Of course there would always be some

problems. The first thing Chang noticed was; his

neck was very sore from always having to look

behind to see where he was going. If he looked

away for only a moment he would crash butt first

into trees, rocks, or whatever there was in the

way. His poor tail was very bruised and sore.

Then there was the problem of finding food: half

Page 14: When Elephants Walked Backwards

the time they had already passed the particular

bush or tree of choice and Chang had to stop and

say “Whoa! Okay, go forward...or I mean

backwards, I mean...nuts...just go back, you went

past it! Okay, now go left, no, no, I mean right.”

It was all so confusing. When you are walking

backwards everything is backwards, or, I mean

opposite. Like I said, it’s all so confusing. I

think you get the picture. Have you ever noticed

that elephants don’t drag their trunks along the

ground as they walk? Well, the reason is

because, very shortly after they started to walk

backwards, nature being what nature is, and

nature does “call”, you could hear, “Yuck, Oh

Gross, Yaaaachh!” as they dragged their trunks

through the freshly dropped manure. Trunks

Page 15: When Elephants Walked Backwards

immediately went up. Plus, as if that’s not

enough, the herd found itself getting manure all

over their feet. Chang said, “This is

disgusting!” His rear legs were also quite

disgusted since they usually walked away from

such things: not into them. We won’t even go

into what the front legs were thinking. Even the

elephant birds that clean the skin of the elephants

wouldn’t come around, as they no longer felt safe

because the herd was acting so erratically.

“Heck, I never know if I’m coming or going and

besides, at any moment I might get crushed if one

of them trips and falls down,” said one of the

birds. “Yes,” they all agreed. They also decided

to find another herd of elephants with some

common sense.

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The last straw, so to speak, was the

problem with the babies. As everyone knows

they walk behind the mother holding her tail with

their trunk. The babies were of course very

young and they still walked in the normal

direction. Nobody in the herd quite understood

why when all of the adults walked backwards.

Of course the babies just did their thing. They

couldn’t walk backwards at all. Now the babies

were in front...or...well...sort of. As soon as they

tried this it became clear...this is impossible. One

of the babies was almost crushed and the mother

yelled and screamed at Chang in the most

impolite language you could imagine. Thai

elephants are always very polite, so this made

Chang feel horrible. Since the mothers couldn’t

Page 17: When Elephants Walked Backwards

hold the babies tails and...well...this is when the

herd said Enough! The solution obviously was to

let the babies walk as usual and have them hold

their mother’s trunk. This way the babies still

walked “forward” face to face with their mothers.

Occasionally one of the babies could be heard to

say, “Aw mom, yuck, you didn’t brush your teeth

this morning.” This face-to-face thing took some

getting used to, but it did seem to work. There

were no close calls after this.

“Whew! At least this problem was

solved,” thought Chang.

All of the other 49 elephants were still

very, very, very upset with Chang and were

considering kicking him out of the herd, which is

actually a family. Poor Chang! He was very

Page 18: When Elephants Walked Backwards

depressed. No one would talk to him. The only

positive thing was; everybody was learning to

walk backwards reasonably well. They did,

however, make it very clear that until and unless

things returned to normal, Chang was not

forgiven.

Meanwhile, the news had spread far and

wide. Elephants in Myanmar, Lao, and

Kampuchea had all heard of Chang and the

backwards-walking elephants of Thailand. They

all had a good laugh...until..., yup, did you guess

it? Their rear legs decided to go on strike; and

they did! Now all of the elephants in Southeast

Asia were walking backwards. All that is, except

for one small herd in Thailand, but more about

that later.

Page 19: When Elephants Walked Backwards

Chang was now famous in all of Asia, but

for all of the wrong reasons. He was definitely

the single most unpopular elephant in Southeast

Asia. Everybody knew his name. Chang of

Thailand, it almost became an impolite word.

Then it happened. One morning, a few

days later, the leader of Chang’s herd, Jinda, told

him he was no longer welcome. “You have made

us the laughing stock of every animal in the

jungle,” he said. “You have made us lose face3

(sorry, no pun intended) and you must leave our

herd. Nobody wants you here. We voted and

you must leave.”

“But where will I go?” Chang pleaded.

3 In Thailand and Southeast Asia in general “losing face” is very bad. Causing another person to “lose face” is one of the worst things one individual can do to another person. Basically, it means you have humiliated another person.

Page 20: When Elephants Walked Backwards

“That’s up to you, but you can’t stay here

any longer. There is no longer a place for you

here.”

Chang burst into tears. He couldn’t

remember ever seeing anybody kicked out of the

family. Slowly he backed off into the jungle.

After a few kilometers he just lay down and cried

and cried, he felt hurt and totally abandoned. He

had never been away from the herd in his whole

life. The herd was his whole life! It was in fact

his family. He spoke very impolitely about, and

to, his rear legs. “Humph,” they said. The rear

legs were getting their way and that’s all they

cared about. After all, they were leading and the

front legs were following.

Page 21: When Elephants Walked Backwards

The next morning he got up and started

walking. He was hungry, so he wandered

through the jungle looking for food. As fortune

would have it, he crashed into a banana tree and a

huge bunch of bananas dropped on his head.

“Ouch! Oh, what luck, yum!” He could hear the

monkeys making rude comments and laughing.

The mynahs were also chattering away and he

was certain they were also laughing. As

everyone knows; mynah birds can speak many

languages so one is never quite sure what they

are really saying. Laughing is quite universal

though and if Chang hadn’t been so busy eating

he might have felt humiliated.