What to Do When a Loved One Dies - Chicago to Do When a Loved One Dies ... Grieving is never completely over, because our love never dies. Your daily rou nes may change. Death ...

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  • WhattoDoWhenaLovedOneDies

    Prac calinforma onandassistancetogetyouthroughdifficultdaysand

    difficultdecisions

    CaptainJamesA.LovellFederalHealthCareCenter(FHCC)

    CaptainJamesA.LovellFederalHealthCareCenter3001GreenBayRoadNorthChicago,IL60064

  • ThestaffattheCaptainJamesALovellFederalHealthCareCenterwishtoextendourdeepestsympathyforyourloss.Thedeathofsomeoneyouloveandcareaboutcanbeachallenging,confusing,lonelyandpainfulexperience.A erthedeathofalovedone,itmaybedifficulttomakedecisions.Unfortunately,thereareatremendousnumberofdecisionswhichmustbemade.Thisbookletcontainsinforma onthatmayguideyouintheo enoverwhelmingjobofdealingwiththeprac calaspectsthatfolloweverydeath.Weurgeyoutoaskforandaccepthelpasyoutrytocopewithyourloss.Wehopethisinforma onwilleaseyourburdenoverthenextfewdaysandweeks.

    Griefhasnoformulaor melimit.Eachpersonhashis/herownwayofgrieving.

  • TAKINGCAREOFYOURSELFANDOTHERS

    Somecommongriefresponsesincludeyearning,denial,anger,guilt,frustra on,overwhelmingsadness,numbnessand/ordepression.Itcanbeespeciallydifficultifthereareunresolvedissuesorconflicts.Youmaybeonarollercoasterofemo onsinthemonthsahead.Youmayexperienceperiodsoffeelingdespair,poorconcentra on,forge ulness,restlessness,anxietyorirritability.Youmayalsofeelquitenormalorevenrelieved.Grievingisnevercompletelyover,becauseourloveneverdies.Yourdailyrou nesmaychange.Deathandgriefdisruptsourlives.Generally,peoplelearntolivewithlossandresumetheirdailypa ernoflife.Childrenneedtogrieveaswell.Dependingonageandcircumstance,thechildorchildrencouldbeincludedinthememorialservices.Donotexpecttoomuchofyourself.Take meforyourselfandforthingsthatyoufindrelaxingorsoothing.Acceptthecomfortandsupportofothers.Forsome,comfortmaybefoundbywri ngale ertoyourlostlovedoneorbyvisi ngafavoriteplace.Bereavementsupportcanbefoundwithfamily,friends,clergyandlocalsupportgroups.TheFHCCoffersbereavementcounselingand/orreferraltoasupportgroupinyourcommunity.Forinforma oncontactourPallia veCareTeamat:2242266369.

  • CHECKLISTAFTERADEATH

    1. Obtainbelongingsandvaluablesfromhospital.2. A endtocareneedsofchildren&disabledspouses(are

    caregiversneeded?)3. Contactpersonalclergy:____________________________4.Chooseamortuaryorcrematory: Name:__________________________________________ Address:________________________________________ ContactPerson:__________________________________ Phone:__________________________________________5. Afamilymemberorfriendmaybeofgreatassistancewith

    allthedetails,butTheNextofKinorDurablePowerofA orneymustsigncertainpaperwork,suchastheReleaseofRemainsforthehospitalandthemortuary.

    6. Funeralarrangements:Burial______Crema on______Pricesarevariable,dependantonservicesdesired. Cemeteryname:__________________________________ Address:_____________________________________________________________________________________ ContactPerson:________________Phone:____________ Date/TimeofWake:_______________________________ Date/TimeofFuneralorMemorialService: ________________________________________________ Date/TimeofBurial:_______________________________ MilitaryHonors(freeforallveterans)_________________

  • 7. Locatelifeinsurancepoliciestofindoutaboutdeathbenefitsthatcouldhelpyoupayforfuneralservices.8. LocateWillandTrustdocuments.9.ContactA orney(ifappropriate):Name:_____________________Phone:______________10.Makedecisionsaboutobituariesandpublicno ces.Somenewspapersofferfreeobituaries.Papers:__________________________________________________________________________________11.Cer fiedDeathCer ficatesmaybeneededfor:_____SocialSecurity _____VAclaims _____Insuranceclaims _____Bankaccounts _____DMV _____Loans _____Unions ThecountychargesafeeforaCer fiedDeathCer ficate

    andcer ficatesmustbeorderedthroughthemortuary.12.AssembleOtherImportantPapers: _____Discharge/Separa onpapers(DD214) _____Cer fiedcopyofthedeathcer ficate _____Birthcer ficate,SocialSecuritycard _____Copyofmarriagecer ficate _____Birthcer ficatesofminorchildren _____Receipteditemizedfuneralbill

  • QUESTIONSTOASKTHEMORTUARY

    Clarifythecostofbasicservicesandwhatisincluded. Whatareaddi onalcosts(casket,plot,urn,crema on,

    sca eringofashes,transporta on,viewingbooklets,flowers,music,programs,etc).

    Burials:whattypeofclothingtobringforthedeceased. Photographofpersonforclosedcasketorcrema on. Isjewelrytobewornorburiedwiththem? IfburialataVeteransCemeteryisdesired;isapplica on

    completedatthemortuary?AcopyoftheVeteransdischargepaperisrequired.VeteranServiceOfficerscanassistifneededpapersaremissing(2177826641).

    Confirmifmortuaryiscoordina ngthemilitaryhonors.

    NOTES_________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

  • Thefamilywillbeaskedbythemedicalstaffifanautopsyisdesired.

    AUTOPSYINFORMATION

    AidingthelivingbyunderstandingdeathYoumayhaveques onsaboutthecauseofdeathorillnessofyourlovedone.Onewaytounderstandwhathashappenedisbyperforminganautopsy.Anautopsycanbringclosureduringthisdifficult me.Itmayprovideinforma onaboutpreviouslyuniden fiedinfec onsorillnesses.Anautopsymaydetermineifthereareinheritedorgene cproblems,thusassis ngotherfamilymemberswithearlydiagnosisand melytreatment. Autopsiesincreasemedicalknowledgewhichcanhelpothers.Autopsiescanrevealthecausesandcourseofillnessesanddiseases.Anautopsymayrevealtheeffectsoftreatments.Evidenceofenvironmentalexposurescano enbefound.Whatislearnedthroughanautopsyononepa entmayhelpsavethelivesofotherswithsimilarcondi ons.Somepeoplemayworrythatanautopsymayconflictwithreligiousorculturalbeliefs.Familiesareencouragedtodiscussthiswithareligiousorspiritualadvisor.AttheFHCC,thereisnochargeforanautopsy.Anautopsyshouldnotdelaythefuneraloraffecttheviewing.

  • VABURIALandSURVIVORBENEFITS1. TheVAdoesnotcoverthemortuarycost,thecostof

    crema onorthecostoftranspor ngtheremainstothecemetery.TheVAwillpayforburialinaVeteranscemeteryforaVeteranandtheirspouseiftheVeteranreceivedanhonorabledischargefrommilitaryservice.Burialincludesthegravesite,graveliner,openingandclosingthegrave,aheadstoneormarkerandperpetualcare.TheVAsNa onalCemeteryAdministra onSchedulingOfficecanbereachedat18005351117.

    2. Aburialallowanceand/orintermentallowancemaybe

    availabletoassistwiththemortuaryandburialexpensesifoneofthefollowingaremet: TheVeterandiedbecauseofaserviceconnected

    disability(VAwillpayupto$2000). Veteranwasreceivingoren tledtoaVApensionor

    compensa onatthe meofdeath(VAwillpayupto$700).

    TheVeterandiedwhilehospitalizedinaVAhospital,

    whilearesidentinaVAnursinghome,whilearesidentinaStateVeteransHome,orwhilereceivingcareinacommunitynursinghomeunderaVAcontract(VAwillpay$700)andcertaintransporta oncostsmaybereimbursed.

    TheremaybeotherfactorsthatwillmakeaVeteran

    eligiblefortheburialallowance.PleasecallthenearestStateVeteransServiceOffice.

  • 3.AveterandiedbecauseofanonserviceconnecteddeathandwasnothospitalizedinaVAhospitalmaybeeligibleforupto$300towardsburialand$700towardsburialinanonna onalcemetery.

    4.AmericanflagsareissuedbytheDecedentAffairsOfficer

    orPostOfficetothefuneraldirectorforaVeteransburial.(Form212008isrequired)

    5. AllVeteransgravesareen tledtobemarkedbya

    governmentprovidedgravemarker.6. AspouseordependentofadeceasedVeteranmaybe

    eligibletoreceiveapension.Todiscusstheeligibilitycriteria,pleaseaVeteransServiceofficer(informa ononpage11).

    7. Aspouseordependentofadeceasedserviceconnected

    VeteranmaybeeligibleforamonthlyDependencyandIndemnityCompensa oncheck.Todiscusstheeligibilitycriteria,pleasecallyournearestStateVeteransServiceOffice.

  • CONTACTINFORMATIONHospitaladdress: CaptainJamesALovell FederalHealthCareCenter 3001NorthGreenBayRoad NorthChicago,IL60064VARegionalOffice(forbenefitsinforma on): 8008271000Pallia veCareCoordinator:2242266369ChaplainService:2246103715SocialWork: PrimaryCareMainCampus:2246105402 PrimaryCareinMentalHealth:2246106665 EvanstonCBOC:2246106310 KenoshaCBOC:2246106215 McHenryCBOC:2246106113A erhoursAdministra veOfficerOnDuty: 2246103747DecedentAffairsOfficer:2246105512CaregiverSupportCoordinator:2246103472

  • VeteransServiceOrganiza onRepresenta vesTheseVSOslocatedatLovellFHCCcanassistyouwithapplyingfordecedentbenefits:AMVETS Building133CA,Room1D113,2246104138DisabledAmericanVeterans(DAV) Building133CA,Room1D116,2246104142 Building135,Room145,2246102961 Building135,Room154(Ac veDutyonly),2246101460IllinoisDepartmentofVeteransAffairs Building135,Room156&157,8476894798,8476894153LakeCountyVeteransAssistanceCommission Building133CA,Room1D112,8473773344MilitaryOrderofthePurpleHeart Building135,Room173,2246103147VeteransofForeignWar Building133CA,Room1D116,3129804284WisconsinServiceOfficers(notlocatedatFHCC):6082661315IndianaServiceOfficers(notlocatedatFHCC):3172323910

    MilitaryDischargePapers(copiesiflost) Online:(quickestop onforresponse)www.archives.gov/veterans/militaryservice

    records/ Phone:3148010800 Wri enRequest: Na onalPersonnelRecordsCenter 9700PageBlvd. St.Louis,MO631325200 A n:appropriatebranchofservice

  • Withmalicetowardnone,withcharityforall,withfirmnessintherightasGodgivesustoseetheright,letusstriveontofinishtheworkwearein,tobindupthena onswounds,tocareforhimwhoshallhavebornetheba leandforhiswidowandhisorphan,todoallwhichmayachieveandcherishajustandlas ngpeaceamongourselvesandwithallna ons

    AbrahamLincoln

    ApprovedbytheCaptainJamesA.LovellFederalHealthCareCenterJune2012

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