VENTURING OUTSIDE

THE HALF GALLON QUARTER ACRE

PAVLOVA PARADISE

HI.This is a snippet of my travel stories.

It shows how my experience with

different cultures (and the food

etiquette I have learnt along the

way), has helped me through some

interesting situations. Have fun reading!

THAT’S ME...ABOUT TO MISS MY FLIGHT

AGAIN!You would have thought I’d have learnt by

now. Thirty countries in three years and I still

can’t make it to the airport on time.

Lucky for me the guys on check-in sneaked

me past the queue. Must have been my

charming personality.

OR MAYBE...IT WAS THE PROMISE OF A

FEW BEERSTHE NEXT WEEKEND

EITHER WAYI WAS READY TO TAKE ON THE

TOP DOGSOF JAPAN AND MAKE SOME

SPEEDYBUSINESS DEALS

Feeling slightly jet lagged and craving

bed, I arrived in Japan. With only a

change of clothes and some scribbled,

barely legible directions...

I KNEWTHIS WOULD BE

ONEINTERESTING TRIP

You may not think so but I can

scrub up pretty well. I put on

my Sunday best, sprayed some

expensive cologne and called a

taxi. I was heading down town

to meet with the corporate big

boys of Japan.

OPPORTUNITYTHIS WAS MY

TO CLIMBTHE CORPORATE LADDER

I had instructions to meet at some local

Teppanyaki restaurant. What I didn’t

realize was what they meant by “local”.

Here I was, alone, facing a dark and narrow

alleyway. Apparently the restaurant was

through a side door to the left. I pushed

open the door and found myself in busy

and authentic Teppanyaki restaurant.

THIS WAS

THE WAY THE LOCALS DO IT

TRUEDINING OUT

A big, burly businessman, you wouldn’t

want to cross in a million years. I shook

his hand and we swapped business cards.

I took a quick traditional bow and we

headed to our seat by the Teppanyaki grill.

IN FRONT OF ME WAS

MY HOSTSomething I learnt a few years back.

Make sure you wait to be directed to your

seat. In Japan, seating arrangements are

determined by status. Trust me, it’s not a

good idea to get this wrong!

HERE’S MY

FIRST TIP

The waitress came over and took our order,

cutting our conversation short.

AFTER SOME

CHIT CHAT

Thank god for the topic change! The

guy was starting to ask some pretty

personal questions. Apparently this is

common in Japan.

SO DON’T BE OFFENDEDIF IT EVER HAPPENS

TO YOU

The thing about Teppanyaki restaurants is that

you literally get to see your meal prepared

from start to finish. The chefs are mad! Knives

and food fly everywhere. It makes the whole

experience like some sort of show.

This time we were seated so close

I could have sworn those knives

were but an inch from my face. It

was one of the most exciting things

I’d experienced in a long time.

TIMEEVEN BETTER THAN THE

WHEN I WRESTLED WITH A

CROCODILE

My food came out first but I had to wait

until my host was served before eating.

Just another Japanese custom you should

know! Once he was served I said the

traditional phrase...

ITADAKIMASU-

RECEIVEI GRATEFULLY

It seemed to do the trick. He looked

impressed that I took the time to

learn about his traditions.

I picked up my chopsticks and began eating. My

chopstick skills may not have been the best, but with a

“fake it until you make it” attitude I knew I could get by.

As a rule I made sure I didn’t wave them around or point

with them. This is a big “no, no” in Japanese culture.

Another thing you should know, chopsticks should

be held towards the end rather than the middle. This

time I slipped up a few times. But by my good luck, my

business associate didn’t notice.

I THINK HE WAS

MUCHENJOYING

THE FOOD TOO

WE WRAPPED UP OUR MEAL

And finished our business

negotiations. I placed the dishes

back in the position they were in

at the start of the meal.

TONIGHTHAD BEEN A

SUCCESSThat night, the food became the middle ground

for our business deal. It really helped show him

that I appreciated and understood his culture. I

had scored myself a foot in the door. All thanks to

a bit of food etiquette experience.

-

This I was pretty nervous about.

My partner had insisted that

I come with her to a wedding

over in Italy. I had said yes to her

without giving it much thought.

There I was, half an hour before

boarding my flight and it hit me.

NEXT CHALLENGE-

IN ITALYTHE IN LAWS

I was going to have to meet the

whole family when I went to her

parents for lunch. Aunts, uncles,

bothers and sisters! I started

freaking out to say the least.

I needed something to calm my nerves.

Drinking my coffee I realized something.

If I could create a mental catalogue of

facts about her family I might be able

to have some sort of chance at winning

them over. I went over all the stuff I knew

about her Italian family. Unfortunately the

more I learnt, the more I felt inadequate

to master the social situation of meeting

them all! I took a deep breath and finished

my coffee. If I came out of this alive, I

could do anything.

I DECIDEDTO GET A

COFFEEAT THE AIRPORT

I was tired but the flight had done

me good. I had managed to chill

out about meeting the family. I

knew that my skills with meeting

new people would help me out

as well as the experiences I had

had with Italian culture before.

I found the house OK. From the

driveway I could hear the tell-tail

signs of a celebration. At least it

seemed to be a relaxed and happy

environment!

From what I had heard Italians

are generally tolerant of others’

uniqueness and manners. They will

mostly tolerate sincere mistakes,

but dislike arrogance and rudeness.

With this in mind I knew I could

get by on the basic etiquette

knowledge as long as I was polite

and gave it my best shot.

I TOUCHEDDOWN IN ITALY

I walked up the driveway and was welcomed by a huge

family. We were in southern Italy so I greeted them all

with a kiss on the cheek. Don’t make the mistake of doing

this in Northern Italy though. Men are only supposed to

kiss very close friends or relatives.

THIS WAS

IT!

I also called them by their last names

and made sure I used “Signore” and

“Signora” but they invited me to call

them by their first names. That’s a tip

I picked up when I was in Italy last. It

gave me brownie points...

AND SHOWEDTHEM THAT I WASN’T TOTALLY

CLUELESS

It was a funny concept having your

main meal in the middle of the day

but it was customary for Italians. I

waited until the host sat down before

I took my seat. This is something you

should always do in Italy!

IT WAS

LUNCH TIMEFINALLY

I COULDN’T BELIEVE

HOW MUCHTHIS FAMILY COULD EAT

I was careful to use my fork rather

than my spoon to eat the pasta

though. Just helpful hint if you ever

dine out with Italians.

A TRUCKLOADEATINGI ENDED UP

OF PASTA

We ate and drank the afternoon

away. I was taken by surprise. The

Italian family wasn’t nearly as scary

as I thought they would be. The cat

even joined us at the table.

Just a bit of advice though. Don’t get

caught with your hands under the

table. In Italy you should always keep

your hands above the table. Luck

for me, my partner pointed this out

before her parents had noticed.

JUST A BIT OF

ADVICE

But somehow I had pulled through.

Not only had I got in with in laws but

I had also pleased the girlfriend! I had

shown them that I respected their

culture though the food etiquette

I knew. It’s funny how a little bit of

knowledge can go a long way.

It was finally time to go home. I was

looking forward to being in my home

country where it wasn’t so hard to

remember the customs of cultures.

I HAD BEENTESTED TODAY

I had promised my mates that I

would come to theirs for a Barbie

on the Saturday night. It was chance

for me to unwind and chill out. I also

knew there would be a fair bit of

skiting about my recent adventures.

CAN YOU

BLAME METHOUGH?

Perfect for a summer evening.

With a casual high five I

greeted my friends. I had

bought a box of beer and out

of share politeness shared

them with the host of the

night. Trust me, I would have

rather drunk them all myself.

If you got to a BBQ make

sure you bring along some

meat too. I had bought along

some sausages and a salad

the girlfriend had kindly made

me. (Told you I had got on her

good side).

I WAS OFF TO A HOUSE

THAT SATRIGHT ON THE BEACH

Tonight was all about relaxing after

a challenging few days of being

immersed in different cultures.

WITH A CHINK

OF BEERS

WE GAVE A TOAST TO

FRIENDSHIPAND COMRADESHIP

This time a mate of mine was the

designated BBQ chef and I was

second in command.

I FIND IT INTERESTING THE

ETIQUETTESURROUNDING A

BBQ

Seeing as I was second-in-

command, I was the only other

one trusted to handle the utensils

and food cooking on the BBQ. This

didn’t happen much though as the

BBQ chef is like a captain on a ship

and should never leave the helm

except for in the case of certain

requirements involving bodily

functions (and usually stubbies).

AND USUALLY

STUBBIES

I was so glad that table etiquette is

relaxed in New Zealand. I could even

use my hands on certain occasions. I did

keep some table manners though and

asked for stuff to passed to me. I hate it

when people try to reach over you!

TUCK INIT WAS TIME TO

I had a full belly and a feeling of light-

headedness from too many beers.

I decided to leave my un-drunk

beers as a gesture of thanks to the

host. Depending on the nature of

the barbecue, sometimes etiquette

allows un-drunk beers to be taken

home. This time I thought it was

better to be safe than sorry.

I DECIDE TOHIT THEROAD

END.THEWhat a week it had been! I hope

my stories inspire you to get off

the couch, learn about some food

etiquette and in the process dive

into the very culture of the countries

you visit. Until next time! Ciao!