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THREE MODES OF BEHAVIOR
• Parent
• Adult
• Child
These are called EGO STATES
They are Felt states of being and not just roles.
Child Ego State
• Natural Child(PRINCE)- Hateful/ loving/ spontaneous/ playful
• Intuitive Child(LITTLE PROFESSOR)- Thoughtful/ imaginative/ creative
• Adapted Child(FROG)- fearful/ guilty/ ashamed
Parent Ego State
• A collection of pre-recorded, pre-judged, prejudiced codes for living.
• Decides, without reasoning, how to react to situations.
• Can be over-controlling and oppressive or life giving, supportive and tender.
Contamination
• When the Adult uses information which has its source in the Child or in the Parent and which may be incorrect.
• Prejudice.
Voices in the head!!
• Parental Tapes being played over in our minds.
• They may be good or bad depending on which parent’s tapes we are playing.
• Critical parent is opposed to natural child.
• Nurturing parent is supportive to natural child.
• Critical parent activates the Adapted Child.
• It is possible to fight your Critical Parent(also called Pig Parent).
RELATIONSHIPS
• Child to Child
• Parent to parent
• Child to Adult
• Adult to Parent
• Adult to Adult
STROKES
• The recognition that one person gives to another
• Essential to a person's life
• Can vary from actual physical touch to praise
• Positive Strokes- “I love you”, “ you did a good job”- Warm Fuzzies
• Negative Strokes- “I hate you”- cold Pricklies.
• When positive strokes are not given, we look for negative strokes rather than be without strokes at all!!
RITUAL
• A pre-set exchange of recognition strokes.
• "Hi!" “How are you?" "Fine, thanks." "Well, see you around. Bye!"
• This is a four-stroke ritual.
PASTIME
• A pre-set conversation around a certain subject.
• Pastimes are most evident at cocktail parties and family get-together.
Games
• Repetitive, devious series of transactions intended to get strokes.
• Unfortunately, the strokes obtained in games are mostly negative.
• A game is a failed method of getting strokes.
Intimacy
• A direct and powerful exchange of strokes which people crave but seldom attain
• The Child is frightened away from it by hurtful experiences.
Work
• An activity which has a product as its result.
• Good work results in the exchange of strokes as a side effect.
TRANSACTIONS
• Transactions occur when any person relates to any other person.
• The three types of transactions: COMPLEMENTARY,CROSSED & COVERT.
• Every transaction is made up of a stimulus and response.
• Communication can continue between ego states as long as trans-actions are parallel.
• Whenever a disruption of communication occurs, a crossed transaction caused it.
Cross Transaction
• When three or more ego states are involved
• The transactional response is addressed to an ego state different from the one which started the stimulus
• They disrupt communication.
Discount Transaction
• One very important kind of crossed transaction
• Here one person completely disregards what the other one is saying.
• Discounts are not always obvious but are always unpleasant
Covert Transactions • A covert transaction is when people say
one thing and mean another.
• Are the basis of games and are especially interesting because they are crooked.
• They have a social (overt) and a psychological (covert) level.
PAYOFFS OF GAMES
• The biological pay-off is strokes
• The social pay-off of a game is time-structuring.
• The existential pay-off of a game is the way in which the game confirms the existential position of each player.
RACKETS & STAMPS
• People collect psychological trading stamps to be traded in for a divorce, a suicide, a drug binge or a blow-up.
ROLES & DEGREES
• The three basic game roles are Persecutor, Rescuer, and Victim
• Games can be played soft or hard
TURNING PEOPLE INTO FROGS
• People are born princes and princesses
• Their parents turn them into frogs.
• Parents script their children
SCRIPT CHECKLIST
• Life course. What short sentence best describes the person's life?
• Counterscript. This is a period of life dominated by the Parent. What does the person do when he seems to be escaping the life-course?
• Parental Injunction. In what way did the Child in mother and father interfere with the person's OK-ness?
• The Game. Every script is based on a major game
• The Pastime. How does a person structure most of their spare time with others?
GOOD AND BAD GAMES and SCRIPTS
• Even though games are crooked they can sometimes be useful.
• Certain scripts may have socially redeeming features