Show Me How You Do That Trick

8/2/2019 Show Me How You Do That Trick

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Show Me How You Do That Trick

Title: Show Me How You Do That Trick

Author: deirdre_c

Pairing: Jared/Jensen

Rating: NC-17

Word Count: ~9,000Warnings: Underage (Jared is 17), humans with canine characteristics, knotting

Author's Note: Special thanks forever to both cherie_morteand poor_choicesfor the fabulous

beta help over the busy holiday weekend. So much helpful guidance from them, all remaining mistakes

are mine. Title from a lyric by The Cure.

Written for juice817for theFall Fandom Free-For-All, where she asked for either high school AU,

spies AU, or knotting fic. I figured, hey, why not write all three?

***

Jared hates the Academy.

He hadnt hated it at the start. In fact, it wasnt so long ago that hed been incredibly relieved to find out

there even was such a place. When at seventeen hed finallyfinally!come of age and popped his first

knot, within twenty-four hours it had inexplicably disappearedand hed found himself instead sloppy-wet

and aching with Omega heat, after which hed somehow slid back into an Alpha state, lust-ridden and

swollen. His parents quietly freaked out, while Jared not-so-quietly freaked out, locking himself in his

room, drained and disgusted and terrified at the way his body was morphing uncontrollably.

Its such a relief when, just days after his bizarre condition manifested itself, representatives of the

Academy arrived on his doorstep, told his parents to pack him a bag and hug him goodbye, and hustled

him into the back of a waiting car, windows tinted so he couldnt see inside. The steely-eyed men who

rode with him calmly explained that Jared was a Shifter, that they were not a myth but really were Pack

members who could change their orientation at will, choosing to behormonally and physically

Alpha, Beta, or Omega whenever they wished.

Theyd whisked him away to this tiny, secluded school, where the small handful of young Shifters were

systematically gathered and trained to work for an ultra-classified branch of the Pack Hierarchy.

Jared had always thought of the Hierarchywhen hed thought about pack governance at allas a

mostly ornamental assembly of representatives from the major familial packs from every region. At the

Academy, he found out it was a far more sophisticated and far-reaching organization than hed ever

dreamed, including the use of Shifters as a covert unit of political enforcement. Students like him were

instructed how to use their unique skills to infiltrate rogue packs, gain access to dangerous anti-

government groups, even seduce (or, rumor among the students had it, murder) specific targets who were
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deemed a threat to state security. A whole lot of serious shit.

So instead of finishing his junior year with his high school packmates back in San AntonioSandy and

Chad, Mike and Tom, heck, he even missed AlexisJared was trapped here at the Academy, with a

bunch of other freaks, learning to be a good little secret agent for a government bureaucracy he didnt

even know existed six months ago.

Yeah. Jared hates it.

It doesnt help that hes a truly terrible liar. The major focus of almost all of his new classes is espionage,

and as much as Jared has always excelled at reading, writing, and arithmetic, hes equally bad at secrecy,

guile, and finesse. They want him to be tactful when he cant help but blurt things out at inopportune

moments. They want him to be stealthy when he feels about as inconspicuous as a giraffe in a herd of

antelope.

He has yet to make it through a single class session on Building and Maintaining an Alias without

giggling, much to the professors chagrin.

Whats even worse are his unexpected struggles with altering his phase. They might have labeled him a

Shifter, but it turns out he pretty much sucks at shifting.

All the first-years at the school start out with intensive training in shifting between the three phases: how

to change scent, to control the secretion of pheromones, to transform internal and external organs. But

unlike the other students, who, once they get the hang of it, seem to change from state to state easy as

changing clothes, Jared cant figure out how to control this power of his. No matter how he struggles,

what techniques the teachers invent, what top-secret research papers on the biology of Shifters he scours,

Jared inevitably, involuntarily slides into the same phase as the nearest person to him. If he pairs withAlona when shes practicing a shift into Alpha, he transforms into an Alpha with her. Put him next to Jake

when hes an Omega, and Jareds suddenly all Omega.

The teachers have tried exposing him to a conflicting pair or a mixed group, but that just gives Jared a

killer migraine or dry-heaves followed by a quick trip to the infirmary.

Fortunately for him, standard practice around the school is for everyone to generally remain in Beta

mode. That way, no one has to worry about clamping down on involuntary biological responses as they

go about their day. Like everyone else, Jared can scent the uncommon presence of Alphas and Omegas

when people shift for class or for homework, or for some experimental sex after lights-out in the dorms

that, when the Heat turns up too high, gets peoples noses twitching and hackles raised. But for the most

part, its only close proximity that precipitates his own shifts.

Small comfort that is when every week that passes in which he still cant shift on his own leaves him

feeling more and more incompetent and out of place. Add to that the fact that groups or crowds have

begun to stress him outwho knows if hell accidentally run into someone, or worse, two, in opposite

phase?and hes well on his way to becoming a hermit.


3/18

Which leads to the worst calamity of all: the Dean of Students decides to assign him Jensen Ackles as a

tutor.

Jared cant really remember exactly when he started to notice Jensen all the time. Well, that isnt

completely true. Hes pretty sure there was a double-take involved the first time he passed Jensen on thequad. It would be more accurate to say that Jared doesnt know when he started to lose his abilitynotto

notice Jensen.

Jensen is in the Upper-School, essentially the Academys version of college. Not that this matters much,

given there are only a hundred or so Shifters here, all told; it just makes him seem more intimidating to

Jared on top of every other amazing thing about him. Compared with all of the other students Jareds met,

Jensen is older, hotter, smarter, kinder everything-er. He has a reputation for being one of the most

skilled upperclassmen the school has seen in years, not that Jared has any good sources for gossip. But

Jared figures that Jensen needs to excel simply in order to hide in plain sight. A face like his would make

it difficult to blend in with strangers, gather information, act as a mole, or any of the other insane things

theyre teaching the students here to do.

So far, Jared has been able to ignore his crush on Jensen; after all, Jared didnt run into him very often

except between classes. And in the cafeteria. And after hours in the main dorms common room, bent

over a book studying. And sure, Jensen is gorgeousseriously gorgeousbut that doesnt mean that

Jared shouldnt push away thoughts of him and focus on other tasks, especially given how badly he is

screwing up at pretty much every single thing getting thrown at him.

Jared wonders, what even happens to Shifters who fail out of the Academy? He wouldnt be allowed to

go home. They cant let him go out and find some pack of normals to join, not with what he is, what he

knows. He tries not to dwell on it.

Jared hasnt made that many friends among his Lower-School classmates yet. Between his shifting defect

and his general dorkiness, he seems to inspire either bullying or over-protectiveness from the rest of the

students, which leaves him a pretty big chunk of time to hide in his room, alternating between

homesickness and loneliness. Every day that passes the simplicity and ease found in his life as a young

pup seem more and more like a vague dream, this new life so intimidating. So Jared keeps to himself,

head down, reining in his normal silly and demonstrative behavior, trying to not to be jealous of the

burgeoning friendships and the copious amounts of sex going on around himteens in close proximity

and all the focus on anatomy and sexy spy stuff, its no surpriseand spending evenings beating off in

the showers to thoughts of Jensens hands and mouth and ass like the pitiful loser he is.

However, that shower-time habit is a bit more awkward now that its Monday, the first day of tutoring

sessions. Jared opens the door, and Jensen himself is there, waiting to step into his room.

Hi. Im Jensen.

I know, Jared replies, standing like an idiot until his brain kicks into gear and he shuffles aside to let


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Jensen in.

First-years live on the top floor of the dorm, where all of the rooms are approximately the size of a

refrigerator box, and, given the fact that Jared recently topped 63 and doesnt show signs of stopping,

its not exactly spacious.

Jensen peers around, smiling to himself. I remember these. He turns to Jared with his eyebrows raised,

like the two of them are in on some private joke. Pretty damn small, huh?

Yeah, Jared says eloquently, but he cant help responding with a smile in return. Even this tiny hint of

human connection feels like sunshine after weeks of rain. Plus, this is the closest hes ever been to Jensen,

and his nostrils flare to draw in the unfamiliar mix of spicy masculine scents, strong russety-flavors like

maple and coffee and amber. It makes him want to step closer and bury his face in the crook of Jensens

neck and just breathe.

Jensen says, Why dont we sit down? and Jareds eyes immediately dart to the one narrow chair at his

desk, and then to his bed, but Jensen is settling cross-legged on the floor, and Jared heaves a tiny sigh of

mixed relief and disappointment. Its just as well. The sight of Jensen on his bed would likely have short-

circuited his brain permanently.

Jared plunks down on the floor facing Jensen, kinda close, so he scoots back to avoid bumping Jensens

knees. Its pretty clear hes a moron. His bones feel brittle, made of twigs. Hes not sure what to say

Hey, thanks for trying to fix me, but Im pretty sure its not going to work since Im such a fuck-upso

he busies himself picking at a hangnail on his thumb.

So, Jensen says. Trouble with shifting? Professor Singer says you copy the people around you, right?

Thats a new one on me.

Me, too, Jared replies with a snort, and Jensen laughs, this easy low chuckle where he claps his hands

together and his eyes crinkle up. Suddenly the whole thing seems a lot less like a disaster waiting to

happen.

But then, without warning, Jensen shifts. Jared feels it like a drop in air pressure, and sure enough he

shifts as well. His body rearranges itself, a twist in his stomach, the back of his neck, spine, toes tingling

cold. Then, instead of two Betas, theres two Omegas sitting on the oval rag rug, one looking surprised,

the other resigned.

Wow. I wasnt sure what to expect. Jensens staring at him hard as if hes trying to get a look under

Jareds skin. That was actually pretty cool.

Jared shrugs. I cant exactly take credit for it. Not too many students outside of Jareds first-year

shifting class have seen him change phase involuntarily, and every time Jared feels a bit like a clever pet

performing a trick.


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So you werent even trying?

Nope.

Okay, what if you trynotto?

Same thing.

Show me. And the way Jensen says it, like theres no question of obedience, gives Jared a little shiver.

Im going to shift back to Beta, and you try to stay in Omega.

Jared nods and tenses up his shoulders, his abs, his thighs, as if he can hold back the change by sheer

muscle-strength. Jared can sense the moment Jensen starts to transform again, slight variations in scent,

posture, expression, all adding up to the same Jensen, but different.

Jared closes his eyes, bowing his chin to his chest, picturing himself solid, inert, immutable. He wills his

body to obey. But, as always, his body pays no mind. Theres a familiar angry pulse deep in his gut, and,

even as he concentrates on preventing it, its gone. Clear water slipping through his cupped hands.

He sighs, peeking up at Jensen through his bangs and sniffing surreptitiously to gauge his reaction. He

doesnt seem repulsed or pityingtwo of the more common reactions Jareds seenso thats good. By

the glint in his eye, Jensen almost looks eager to take on a challenge.

Which is good, because Jareds so very ready to hand it off.

Well, looks like we have our work cut out for us, Jensen says, smoothly rising to his feet and holding

out a hand to help Jared up. Jared hesitates a second, but then reaches up to clasp Jensens hand. Its firmand warm and fuck if Jared doesnt feel the blood rush to his crotch just from the touch of skin on skin.

Thanks. Hes up and shambling backward until the backs of his knees hit the bed, thinking,dont blush

dont blush please dont blush. I mean, I appreciate that youre willing to try to help me.

No problem, man. Its weird, but I cant believe its permanent. All we gotta do is find a way to flip the

right switch. Who knows? I bet if we work at it, we can get you straightened out by winter.

As he follows Jensen to the door, Jared discovers that theres this tiny part of him that hopes not, if it

means hell keep getting Jensen alone.

Jensen informs him that Dean Gamble wants them to meet every other day, and it becomes a regular thing

that Jensen stops by after his four-oclock seminar on the Political History of Pack Territorial Law to

practice with Jared until the bell rings for dinner.

Every session, Jensen first has Jared tryunsuccessfullyto shift on his own, then leads him through all

the exercises they can dream up: Jensen shifts into Alpha as slowly as he can to see if Jared, once started,


6/18

can speed ahead and finishing shifting first; or, Jensen will rapidly change to Omega and quick-switch

back to Beta, hoping to leave Jared alone in Omega phase. He tries to get Jared to isolate specific

pheromones or hold onto one trait while Jensen changes another, but to no avail. He makes Jared keep

precise records of each of the methods they try, watching over his shoulder as Jared writes another line in

a slim black notebook, leaning in enough to make Jareds handwriting shakier than normal.

One Wednesday afternoon, Jensen shows up and hes not alone. Beside him in the hallway is a slight,

dark-haired girl, another first-year.

Jared didnt realize Jensen even knew any other first-years.

You and Genevieve are friends from classes, right? he asks, and even though friends is a bit of an

overstatementJared exchanges a quick glance with Genevieve to make sure shes not offended at the

labelhe nods his head, opening the door wider for them to enter the room.

While Jensen tosses his backpack in the corner as usual, Genevieve unabashedly peers around. Jared

figures she might be the only student other than Jensen whos been in his room, no wonder shes curious.

He wishes he knew her better, decides that, since Jensens essentially vouched for her, maybe he could sit

next to her in Chemistry tomorrow, rather than by himself in the back row.

Jensen says, I know you told me that earlier in the term you experimented with what happens around

people in two different phases. Its that wheedling tone he uses when he wants to get Jared to try

something Jared knows wont work. I just thought, after all the work weve been doing, it might go

better now.

Jareds face scrunches up skeptically. He doesnt see how theres any evidence at all to suggest things

will go any differently. But, hes not about to wimp out on Jensen, or Genevieve for that matter, just toavoid a headache. Okay. Lets give it a try.

He holds the desk chair out for Genevieve to sit, then kneels on the floor next to Jensen to create a

triangle. Genevieve leans forward so that her elbows rest on her knees, and like that, despite the chair,

shes barely taller than Jensen and him. What do you want me to do?

Jareds best at shifting into Alpha, Jensen takes the lead, so why dont you shift to Omegadefinitely

not in Heat, okay?and at the same time Ill go into Alpha. Jared, Jensen pins him with a look,

demanding all of his attention, try to ignore her and follow me. Alright?

He and Genevieve both nod. Jensen rests his hand on Jareds shoulder; theyve discovered that contact

sometimes helps him shift more quickly. Jared leans into it ever so slightly and takes a deep breath. Its

going to work this time.

Ready, Jensen says. Go.

Jared does his best to block out Genevieve, barely notices the scent of her growing softer, more


7/18

vulnerable, because at the same time Jensen seems to burst into Alpha. For a moment, Jared doesnt

move, doesnt shift, nothing, but before the small seed of hope can even take root, a bomb goes off along

his nerve endings, and he buckles forward, curling in on himself, red wash of misery flooding his head

and chest.

He can barely hear Jensen instructing Genevieve to do something, cant tell if hes supposed to dosomething, too. Wouldnt be able to anyway, hes too preoccupied with pressing his forehead down onto

his fists where they clench, dig desperately into his thighs. He bites the inside of his cheek, plunges his

hand into his hair and yanks as hard as he can. Any pain to counteract the one inside his head.

The overhead light goes out and suddenly Jensens crouching down on the floor beside Jared in the

dimness, gently lifting him to his feet, encouraging him toward the bed. It would be Jareds favorite

fantasy made real if it werent for the fact that his brain is currently trying to leak out of his ear. Jensens

making this ludicrous shush-ing sound, so Jared forces himself to stop the low moans that keep rolling out

of him. He doesnt want Jensen to feel bad about the attempt and its aftermath. Instead he buries his face

in the pillow and tries to focus on breathing instead of panting.

After a minute or so, he feels the bed dip, and Jensens sitting beside him.

Do you want me to get the nurse, pup? Jensen whispers. Jared gives his head the tiniest of shakes.

A minute more, and then a hand rests on the back of Jareds neck. Gentle fingers comb through the over-

long strands of Jareds hair, tucking loose ends behind his ears, massaging his scalp, small circles

alternating with long, slow strokes.

Gradually, the gong sounding in Jareds head settles down to a dull thump. Jensen keeps petting him until

he falls asleep.

***

Even after the disastrous experiment with Genevieve, even though Jared still shows no signs of improving

his voluntary control, Jensen refuses to give up. In fact, Jensen starts to stick around once their sessions

are over, walking with Jared down to the cafeteria and even sitting with him to eat once in awhile, despite

the fact that Jensens friends from the Upper School tease him about sitting at the kiddie table as they

stroll past. Jensen usually just throws a handy breadstick or grape at them. It doesnt take long for some of

the first-years to start to gravitate to their table, wondering what it is about Jared that can lure an older

student into their territory. For the first time since arriving, he feels like hes part of a pack again.

***


8/18

The leaves are mostly off the trees, crunchy underfoot, and although the sun squats at a deep angle in the

sky, its still warm enough that Jared can sit out on the quad catching up on his class reading. Jensen

parks himself on the stiff grass next to him, as he always does when he catches Jared here. Times like

this, Jensen will reminisce with him about Texas or share rumors about the professors or tell Jared stories

about the few preliminary field missions hes been allowed out on, carefully avoiding the topic of Jareds

shifting. Jared will sometimes close his book or his notes and lay back, one arm thrown across his eyes,letting Jensens voice wash over him. Jared wants to shut out the rest of the world or make time stop or

something, just so he can hold onto the moment with Jensen. That feeling, it comes over him more and

more often andit scares the shit out of him.

Today he slants a glance sideways when Jensen sits down, taking in the way his dark, calf-length pea coat

makes him look so adult, especially compared to Jared and his puffy zip-up jacket thats not quite long

enough at the wrists. Jensens wearing a fringed scarf, for fucks sake, intricately draped around his neck,

and yet he manages to make it look classy rather than affected. Jared wonders what other things Jensen

could do with that scarf, if hes so clever with knots, and feels himself start to blush.

Trying to keep his thoughts from straying into dangerous territory, Jared blurts out, Do they ever make

us do things we think are wrong? You know, on assignment?

Jensen turns to him, one eyebrow raised in a where did this come fromkind of way, but then replies, No.

Not really. Students like us are briefed on missions by professors, but later on, when were agents, well

report to people higher up in the Hierarchy. They give you as many facts as they can, but they never force

you to take the assignment. At least Ive never heard of such a thing. He shrugs. Coercion doesnt seem

like a very effective approach if you actually want a job done.

Jared looks off toward the administrative buildings huddled at the far end of the campus. Theres quiet.

After awhile he says, not turning his head, What if Im neverif I never figure this out? What if theycant use me?

Jensen doesnt leap in with his typical glib reassurances, and Jared doesnt know if it makes him feel

better or worse: that Jensens taking him seriously or that theres no comfort to be had. He can feel the

heat of Jensens gaze on his cheek. The eventual answer is something that Jared rarely hears from Jensen.

I dont know, man.

They stay sitting on the lawn, just a few feet separating them, until the sun goes behind a bank of clouds,

and they have to retreat inside.

***

Its well into the new year when Jensen mentions to Jared how some of his friends from the Upper-School

get together to hang out Friday nights in the copse of pines on the hill overlooking the south side of the

campus. Jared nods, always interested in gleaning every tidbit he can about Jensens life.


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Jensen pauses, then says, So? and it dawns on Jared that today is Friday and Jensens inviting him to go

along later.

Yeah. Im there! He can tell hes got the stupidest grin on his face, and he doesnt even care. Jensen

wants to take Jared to a party.

I can see your tail wagging, mutt, Jensen teases.

Shut up, Jared throws back. Like you were ever invited to Upper-School parties at my age.

Are you kidding? Ive been in demand since the day I set foot here. They wouldnt even consider

throwing a party at this school without me. And although Jensen obviously thinks hes being facetious,

Jareds confident that this is way closer to the truth than not.

At ten that night he pushes open the front door of the dorm to find Jensen waiting for him on the steps.

Ready? Jensen asks, hopping to his feet and brushing the dust from the seat of his pants. Yeah, thats

not distracting.

Jared clears his throat. Definitely. Hes bouncing on his toes, and when Jensen laughs and throws an

arm over his shoulder as they start off, Jared thinks he might have to start running in circles just to burn

off the excess adrenaline.

Most of his excitement dims when they reach the top of the hill. He stops at the edge of a clearing thats

humming with sound, only fifteen, twenty people total. Its hard to tell, but it feels to Jared like three

times that. All older kids, all made alien by the orange shadows thrown by the small bonfire crackling in

the center of a ring of light-colored stones. The smoke masks everyones scents in a way that prickles thehair on the back of Jareds neck; hed forgotten how badly hes lost his feel for crowds.

Jensen claps him on the shoulder and prods him forward, Come on. I want to introduce you to my

buddy, Danneel.

But Jared pulls away gently, Ill be there in a minute. Jensen tilts his head with a concerned look, but

Jared waves him off, taking a seat in obscurity on top of a smooth-worn picnic table that provides an

arms-length view.

Its not that Jared doesnt recognize most of the other kids: Julie and Lauren. Aldis from the gym. A.J.

and Travis. Cindy, who does yoga on the quad. That weird dude, Misha, whos a TA for Professor Fuller.

Clusters of three and four, people he knows by sight if not by name. And then theres Matt, Sebastian, and

Richard.

Despite his semi-seclusion, they spot him and, together, saunter over.

So, its Padalecki, isnt it? Matt hops up onto the picnic table next to Jared, Richard and Sebastian


10/18

straddling the benches down at the other end. He slaps Jared jovially on the back and shoves a bottle into

his hand. Jareds not wild about the taste of beer, but he takes a swig anyway. Youre quite the talk of

the school.

Jared doesnt know what to say to that. He wishes he could see better in the flickering light.

Richard scoots a little closer and chimes in, Ive heard youre a mimic.

Ive heard youve got a malfunction, Sebastian says.

He doesnt like where this is going, but hes unsure what todo. Hes certainly knows the reputation of

these three: tough guys not quite at the top of the school pecking order, but acting like they own the place.

They like to hassle lowerclassmen, and although Jareds managed to avoid them so far, it looks like bad

luck has caught up with him again.

He doesnt want a fight with Jensens friends, but theyre giving off some really nasty vibes. It sucks

because three-against-one is pretty crap odds. Richard might be a little guy, but Sebastian and Matt both

outweigh Jared who, for all his height, still looks like a scarecrow-in-a-shirt despite regular morning

weights and cardio before class.

So Jared temporizes. I guess youve heard right. He takes another sip from the bottle, trying not to

make a face.

Maybe we can help you out with that? Matt lilts, leaning closer still. Seeing as how our bright boy

Jensen he laces the name with arsenic, hasnt been able to do you any good.

Jared opens his mouth with some version ofscrew you ready to pop out when he feels Matt start to shiftinto Alpha phase, right there in front of him. The tang of his scent is harsher, heavier than his classmates

or Jensens. Not pack. Jared rears back, but Sebastian is suddenly behind him, Richard circling around to

box him in. And in the blink of an eye, theyre all fully Alpha, forcing Jared to begin to turn, too.

What the fuck? Jared says, eyes darting over Richards shoulder in search of support, but Jensens

talking to a red-headed girl on the other side of the fire and the picnic table is downwind, shadowed under

the low limbs of a tree. But then he reaches full-Alpha phase himself, and any thought he had of

conciliation or backing down is washed away in a powerful surge of hormones.

Dont mess with me, Matt. Jared growls, standing up, jaw clenched against the urge to bear his teeth.

Come on, Jared. Matts Alpha instincts transform his initial wheedling tone into a challenge for

dominance, Youre just not trying hard enough.

He jerks his chin at Sebastian, who smirks and flows into Omega between one breath and the next. Jared

flinches and gasps as a spasm of pain shoots through him, wrenched in two directions and then three as

the older guys crowd closer. Theyre all sostrong.


11/18

He can feel his stomach torque, forcing bile up into the back of his throat. A sharp chisel drives into the

base of his skull and he cries out from between gritted teeth, hoping and fearing the other upperclassmen

wont hear him. Its his worst fear: such public exposure of his abnormality. As the pain ramps up and up,

devastating, Jared almost hopes that its enough to kill him this time. Useless, defective, unfit for society

or school or even as a science experiment. Better to be culled from the Pack.

He starts to shiver uncontrollably. Every sense gets abruptly sharper: the sting of each pressure point

where Matt grips his arm in belated alarm, the acrid smoke coating his nose and throat, the moon so

bright he has to squeeze his eyes shut.

Abruptly, something inside him breaks, a ruptured dam exploding outward. Ice slides along the branching

tributaries of his nerves, cold beyond anything he imagined feeling. Jensens voice calls to him. But then

theres merciful silence.

***

Jared doesnt know how he got back to his dorm room, but thats where he discovers himself when hes

jolted awake by determined knocking on the door. He ignores it, curling up to listen to his heart beat thick

and heavy in his chest, until the school nurse calls out that shes come to check on him.

Barefoot, but still in his tee and jeans from the night before, he lurches to the door and opens up, allows

her in to take his temperature and blood pressure, even while assuring her that hes fine in some terms that

mustve satisfied.

He crawls back under the covers and sleeps for five more hours.

Eventually, he drags himself out of bed to study, even though his arms and legs feel like they are made

out of putty. He fishes a protein bar out of the drawer and eats it in two bites while staring blankly at his

desks oak surface. Its pocked with a patina of tiny scratches, the countless random impacts of books and

pencils and sharp-edged paraphernalia of the students assigned this room before him. Jared wonders

where all of them are now, whether any of them felt as worthless as he does right now.

He boots up his desktop and heroically avoids looking at the six new emails from Jensen sitting in his

inbox.

Chemistry problem sets, then econ, then readings on encryption and surveillance techniques. Jared knocks

them out one by one, trying to lose himself in the dispassionate rigor of those subjects. All the while the

specter of his daily shifting exercises looms over the process. The only thing its going to do is remind

him of his humiliation last night, how asinine he mustve looked getting toted down the hill, out cold, like

a sleeping toddler being carried to bed. At least its the weekend, not a day Jensen is scheduled to come.


12/18

When theres no homework left to do but Shifting, he considers skipping it and heading down to eat. But

facing the other students in the cafeteria actually sounds less appealing than practice, useless or not, so he

slips from the desk chair down to the floor to settle in the same cross-legged position he and Jensen

always use. Perfunctorily, he closes his eyes, dismisses the phantom pain that lingers from the night

before, and imagines undergoing the change that Matt dragged him through, the subtle adjustments in

physical characteristics, brain chemistry, odor that shift him from Beta to Alpha.

All at once, he surges to his feet, staring down at his body in disbelief, because, holy shit, hesthere. He

spins around like a top, searching his shoebox room as if some random Alpha will be standing there

behind him, unnoticed. But no. Hes all alone. And hes truly shifted.

He closes his eyes, wills himself back to Beta phase. Then Omega. Then Alpha again. Each time the chill

churns in his guts and by the end hes gasping, woozy from the abrupt series of shifts and euphoric at the

very notion that this is finally, finally within his grasp. Collapsing down on the bed, he laughs out loud.

Immediately he springs up again, flinging himself out the door and down four flights of stairs.

Hes got to find Jensen.

He doesnt search long before hes rewarded with the sight of Jensen standing out of the flow of dinner

traffic near the first-floor lecture hall, talking to a girl Jared doesnt know. It looks like Jensen must have

just come in from a run; hes dressed in sweats, his skin glistening and cheeks pink-flagged. Jared stops

dead in the middle of the hall and stares. Jensen is rubbing diffidently at the back of his neck, smiling at

something the girl said. But when she places her hand casually on Jensens bicep, something in Jared

rears up like a cobra. A feeling of incredible rage like hes never known seizes him, chokes him,no you

shouldnt smile like that at anyone else and no Danneel, or whoever you are, you dont get to stand so

close to him.

A low growl escapes his lips before he can stop it and Jensen must hear, because he glances up at Jared in

surprise. "Hey. Hey! Are you all right? Why havent you" Jensen breaks off, his brow furrowing as he

scents the air. Jared? He goes to step forward, but the girls still holding onto him and Jensen hesitates.

The urge to launch forward and rip Jensen away from her hits Jared low and hard, and he stands there

silent, shuddering, trying to resist, to think beyond the red haze thats filling up his vision. Somethings

wrong with him, hes losing his goddamn mind. Because all he wants is to shove Jensen down onto the

nearest flat surface, drag those loose sweats off his hips, andfuckhim in front of the entire student body.

And just where in fucking hell is thatcoming from? The room spins slightly as Jared whirls around,

looking to escape before he loses control of himself. People already think he's a freak, a deviant; he

doesn't need to prove it.

So Jared runs, dodging between bodies, ignoring angry exclamations from the other students. He flings

himself around the corner and into the empty stairwell. The impact with the far wall drives dull rods of

pain into his arms as he stops his headlong rush, pressing his cheek to the rough brick, struggling for

breath. His cock is swollen and heavy between his legs, thickening with each pump of blood through his


13/18

veins.

He smells Jensens hurried approach before he sees him.

Jared. That voice. It rumbles through him like hes a hollow drum. He can picture Jensen standing there

behind him, hands up unthreateningly, as if hes soothing some wild animal, a dog gone rabid.

Go away, he spits.

No, youre in Heat. Youre an Alpha and youre in Heat and I dont know whats happening, but you

need to let me help you.

As soon as Jensen says it, Jared recognizes the frantic turmoil of Heat from that first transformation back

at home. Recognizes what some of his classmates struggled with in those first early days before learning

control. Remembers. In his room. Hed shifted, and didnt shift back to Beta. Never before had he needed

to pay attention to what phase he was in; its always been automatic.

But knowing doesnt help. Jared is like a coiled spring, squeezed down tight upon itself and waiting for

the instant the pressure lets up. He wants Jensen, needs him, but not like this, with this burning,

uncontainable ferocity that threatens to overwhelm the last sane thought remaining in his head. I said, go

away. Dont look at me. I cantJensen

That last comes out as a whisper, because Jensen steps closer, and Jared swears he can hear Jensens

heartbeat pounding loud inside his chest, feel the luster of his body heat, but most of all he can smell

Jensens spicy scent. Intermingled with it is a strange scent: that girls.

With a roar of dominance, Jared turns and surges forward with a certainty hes never felt before in hislife. He yanks and twists so Jensens back hits the wall, and the force is enough to make Jensen gasp, the

sound ringing through Jareds head like shattered glass.

"Dude!" Jensens hand shoving back against his chest burns him. "Jared, what are you"

Jared doesnt think, doesnt stop, just licks at Jensens mouth, enjoying the hiss of reaction before he

scrapes his teeth against the his jaw, clutching the short strands of Jensens hair and forcing him to show

his neck as he nips the sensitive skin hard enough to leave marks. Hes so hot, so hungry, so he swipes his

tongue back up the strong column of Jensens neck, tasting salt and musk, his chin rubbing across the

collar bone, lapping against the beating pulse point at the jugular. This is mine, he thinks blurrily, or

maybe he says it out loud.

Jensen stops pushing on his chest and reaches up for Jareds face, but instead of thrusting him away, he

hauls Jared into a kiss. It's open-mouthed and desperate, sloppy, all teeth and slick tongue, and Jared is

pretty sure he is doing it wrong, except for how Jensens making these tiny whines in the back of his

throat that sound a lot like pleasure, not disappointment.


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Jared bites down on his bottom lip hard enough to send a jolt through Jensen that Jared can feel. Jareds

more afire than ever, but the violence of bite, and Jensens pain, brings him back to himself for a moment.

He licks his lips to chase the flavor of Jensens mouth, even as he stumbles away, which may just be the

hardest thing hes ever done.

He starts babbling, Im sorry. So sorry. God, you must think Im insane. Im just going to go back to myroom and IllIll let this wear off. And we can just pretend

Jensen barks out a laugh, his eyes sparkling and fond, and grabs Jareds wrist, forestalling further retreat.

Youre a moron, you know that? Jensen says, and steps agonizingly closer. Dont you know that Ive

wanted this since the first day you arrived on campus? I even volunteered myself to be assigned as your

tutor so I could spend time with you, get to know you. And then I did, and now youre all I think about.

He shifts his grip to Jareds elbows and hauls him closer so that theyre chest to chest. Goddamnit, I tried

so hard to just be your friend, shield you, not complicate things, but youre nothing if not Jensens

reaches up and cups Jareds cheek complicated.

Jensen, Jared says, trying to wrap his mind around it, shock and hunger and heat all warring within him.

Now, are you going to let me help you with this? And on the last word, he tilts his hips up so that the

searing, undeniable bulge in Jareds jeans presses into Jensens belly.

Jared thinks that if he opens his mouth to speak, he might scream or burst into tears or tear Jensens

clothes off with his fucking teeth. So he simply gives a sharp nod.

Jensen lets out a relieved huff of breath, as if hed been doubting Jareds answer. "My room," he chokes.

"I think my room would be a good idea right now."

Jared just turns and pulls Jensen up the stairs to the second floor. He doesnt even remember how they get

to Jensens dorm room, only knows he does it without ever letting go of Jensens wrist. Jareds only been

inside once or twice, but he barely gives it a glance before yanking Jensens arm, sending him sprawling

onto his bed. At least its a double, pillows and blankets neatly arranged, not the narrow twin Jared has up

in his room.

Jensen laughs as he bounces on the mattress. I think I like this side of you! Then he leans back on his

elbows, slow like hes putting himself on display, and murmurs soft and dirty like Jared only imagined he

could sound, So, how do you want me? Beta or Omega?

Theres no question. Omega, Jared demands. Jared knows that Alphas and Betas have casual sex all the

time, but thats not what hes craving. He realizes he doesnt just want to fuck Jensen, he wants shove his

knot inside him, to tie them together, to breedhim.

Yeah, Jensen breathes, and in the moment it takes him to slip his shirt over his head, he shifts. Jensens

bowed legs become more pronounced, his eyes bigger, more liquid. The flesh on his nape and shoulders is

so smooth and creamy it almost glows, and his lips are swollen as if Jared had been sucking on them for


15/18

hours. The tiny bites Jared inflicted in the stairwell parade in a vivid red line down Jensens neck.

And, good god, he reeks. Jared practically swims in the rich scents of stale sweat lingering from Jensens

run, and of Jensens lust, of Jensens eagerness. Jared doesnt hesitate, tears off his own shirt, fumbling

with the button on his jeans until he can rip them open, thrust them down. He kicks them away, his dick

slapping wet and stiff against his belly as he advances toward the bed.

Jensen moans, then swears under his breath and begs, Please, Jared, just come here, let me He sits

up, swinging his legs open so that he can pull Jared in close, warm hands gripping the bare skin on

Jareds sides to hold him standing still, his mouth level with Jareds crotch and he licks at the trace of

moisture coating the tip of Jareds cock before drawing the head into his mouth.

Jared cries out, can feel his ribs spread beneath Jensens palms when he arches back reflexively, sliding

deeper in. Its like nothing hes ever felt before, this tight, wet heat encompassing him. He shudders, legs

nearly buckling, hands scrabbling for purchase and burying themselves in Jensens short hair as he bobs

up and down on Jareds cock. Jensen hums approvingly when Jareds fingers grip his scalp and Jared

whines at the vibrations it sends through him, finally peeling his eyes open when Jensen pushes his hands

off and falls back onto the bed sheets, panting.

He licks his glistening lips obscenely. Ready when you are, Alpha, Jensen says, trying to make it sound

light-hearted,but it rings in Jareds ears like a challenge.

He plants himself at the end of the bed, leaning forward to hook his fingers into the waistband of Jensens

soft sweats, wrenching them down his legs, and tossing them in the direction of the floor. And oh fuck,

they're both naked. Hes nearly in a frenzy now, this devastating, consuming need to possess Jensen

completely that makes him nuzzle hungrily at the pale, toned stomach bared to him, working his way up

Jensens body to nip repeatedly at one taut nipple, to nose deep into the soft hair of Jensens armpit, toworry the thin skin behind his ear.

Hes so engrossed in exploring Jensens body, he hardly notices the desperate noises, cries and pleas

Jensen makes in response until hes heaving Jared off and rolling over onto his belly, rucking his knees up

under him so that his ass thrusts high off the bed.

Now. Please. Jared. Each word is a harsh gasp and it fans Jareds flame even higher to see Jensen so

needy, so ungoverned. Jared knows all Shifters (well, all functioning ones) learn to control their reactions

to Heatits one of the extraordinary abilities that make them so valuable as agentsand yet here, now

Jensen has thrown off his defenses, sinking himself as deep into sensation as Jared.

At any other time, the thought of sex with Jensen would have Jared hesitating, second-guessing,

embarrassed in the face of utter inexperience. But not now, not with the Alpha Heat riding him, spurring

him on, the blood pulsing swift beneath the thin barrier of his skin. Jared doesnt even wonder or doubt

what to do, instinctively slides between Jensens thighs, kneeing them apart to open him up wider.

He grips the cheeks of Jensen's ass, kneads with his palms and spreads with his fingers, revealing the tight


16/18

furl of Jensens entrance already wet with an Omegas natural lubrication, skin all around it glossy with

sloppy-slick. The tide of urgent ache in his gut surges higher at the sight, and he slides the thumb of his

left hand across it, playing around the rim, then tugging it open to push two fingers easily inside, curling

them, he adds a third, small strokes in and out.

Jensen keens so loud they can probably hear him on the quad, hips twitching and rolling, trying to heavebackward, shove Jareds fingers deeper. In me. Need you in me, Jared, fuck. Hurry.

Jared looks down, for the first time discovers the large knot at the base of his dick just starting to swell.

He cant wait anymore, not for what he wantswhat they both wanthim buried inside Jensen, tying

them together. His fingers slip from Jensens body as Jared scoots closer, fitting his thighs up against the

back of Jensens, aligning his cock so that it presses against Jensens opening, and plunges in.

Jensen gives easily around the head of Jared's cock, he's so fucking wet inside. Jared groans and thrusts in

a little farther, and then again, and again, watching Jensen's whole body writhe, feeling the heated clench

of Jensens channel along his entire length. But he needs to get still closer, plant himself deep, deep

inside. He leans down to lick at the fresh sweat thats broken out between Jensens shoulder blades, and

then stretches farther to sink his teeth into the tender nape of Jensen neck. Jensen hisses, arches, dropping

his head in submission as Jared bears him down into the mattress, pinning him. Jareds knot is a swollen,

solid pressure, rolling and expanding inside Jensens slick hole, plugging him up.

Fuck. Fuck.Fuck. Jensens tossing his head now, grinding almost painfully back into Jareds hips.

Jared growls against his skin through clenched teeth; his thrusts grow quicker, ragged and shallow now as

he ties them together, his entire core glowing with the heat of the stream of precome he can feel flowing

into Jensen.

At some point hed trapped Jensens hands under his own, forced them down into the bed with theirfingers hard entwined, but now he releases one hand, reaches underneath their joined bodies to grope for

Jensens cock, taking the rigid length in hand, dying to feel Jensens release.

He strokes, Jensen jerks, his jaw tightens its hold on Jensens neck. Tomorrow welts will rise just below

Jensen's hairline, a brand of Jareds for the world to see.

So hotso fucking hotJared thinks his brain is melting. His cock locked inside Jensen, his hand

moving faster, twisting over the wet head of Jensens dick. He can't think anymore, and he's barely aware

of Jensen moaning, "oh, oh," and spurting thick and messy all over Jareds palm and contracting around

him and, that it's more than he can take. Jared comes, erupting, shooting so much, so hard, his body

temperature soaring up, that he thinks he might be cooked alive.

Shocks of pleasure roll through him: spine, shoulders, fingers, toes. Time stands still and he comes and

keeps coming, like a river rushing off the edge of the map. Then Jensens face swivels around, searching,

and Jared wrenches his mouth from the grooves hes sunk into Jensens nape to capture his mouth, licking

and sucking and tasting the distilled residue of Heat like syrup and cinnamon.


17/18

They keep kissing until the tremors stop, and Jared finally pulls away a little, taking a few gulps of air,

breath hitched and shaky. Inside Jensen, hes still pulsing in gentle spurts that feel like the marrow is

flowing out of his bones.

Were gonna be here awhile, Jensen says at last, drained and raw.

Yeah, II guess I knew that. Sorry? His head clears a bit, and Jared tentatively touches his tongue to

the angry bite mark on the back of Jensens nape, a tiny soothing lick.

Naw. Jensen wriggles his hips slightly back into Jareds, testing where theyre tied together, still

panting shallowly himself. He reaches around and grabs Jareds wrist, tugging his hand in a slow drag up

the taut, damp skin of Jensens belly, chest, all the way to his mouth. He sucks at Jareds fingers, licks at

the pads, the meaty heel of his hand. You know, you can make me come again while we wait. Maybe

twice more there was asmirk in Jensens voice as it dipped low and filthy, if youre good.

It makes Jared moan with pleasure, his cock twitching with another spurt of come inside of Jensen, still

filling him with so much that without Jareds knot holding it in there would be hot trails of it making their

way down between their pressed-together thighs, puddling underneath them on the bed. Show me how.

**

He wakes up Beta again, a grayish hint of morning light sneaking through Jensens half-closed blinds. He

opens his eyes to the sight of Jensen, also Beta, still stretched out beside him on the bed, propped up on

one elbow, gazing down at him. That might sound creepy, but theres something so tender about the look

in Jensens eyes that it has Jared wriggling down into the covers in a surge of unexpected joy.

Can you still shift? Jensen asks abruptly.

Jared pauses, then reaches down into himself and changes phase, Alpha to Omega, then back to Beta with

a bright grin. It doesnt even make him dizzy or strange this time, easy as pie.

But Jensen doesnt smile back, just runs his hand through his sleep-messy hair, looking at a spot over

Jareds shoulder. So, he says, finally, I guess youre not going to need a tutor anymore?

Jareds heart clenches. What? No! Im almost a whole year behind on this shifting thing. I need someone

to help me catch up.

Oh, Jensen replies. But thats all.

Unless Jareds so stupid. Jensen must be regretting this this thing between them already. Hes

probably looking for a way to let Jared down easily. Unless, you dont have time, or Jared trails off,

not even sure where he was going with that, trying to scoot over closer to the beds edge so that theres no

danger of him touching Jensen. So stupid.


18/18

Im sorry. Im so sorry. And Jared catches the inside of his cheek between his teeth, bracing himself,

because here it comes. I took advantage of you last night. I have no excuse, and Im sick over it. Jensen

squares his shoulders and looks straight at Jared, miserable, strain evident in the corners of his eyes. You

needed helpand II Jareds pretty sure hes never seen Jensen at a loss for words and it nearly

breaks his heart. Especially because his guilt is so misplaced.

Jensen. Stop. Jared leans up, puts a hand over his mouth, then moves it so he can kiss him, gently this

time, so different from last night, and Jensen lets him. They arent even really kissing, just touching their

mouths together. Jensen has soft lips, theyre perfect, really, but Jared masters the desire to go on kissing

them forever. He says, You dont have anything to apologize for. Heat or no Heat, all I want, all Ive

wanted since we met, is to be with you. Hes reminded of what Jensen said in the stairwell and smirks.

Whos the moron now?

Jensen leans back. Oh, pup, he says ruefully, and by the way the nickname rolls off his tongue, Jared

can tell hes on the verge of giving in.

Besides, Jared says, looking up at Jensen through his bangs and slyly slipping into Omega phase, Do

you really want someone else helping me practice my shifting exercises?

He laughs as the world tips and rolls and theres an Alpha on top of him, knees boxing his hips, hands on

his shoulders. No one else but me, Jensen snarls, but hes laughing too, grip moving to Jareds hair so

he can angle his mouth for another kiss. They are both gross, tacky with dried come and sleep, the sheets

a disaster, but Jared doesnt care. Hes ready to go again, beginning to feel the differences of Heat as an

Omega, melting boneless under Jensen into the bed.

I have so much to teach you, Jensen says.

Everything. Give me everything youve got.

Maybe the Academy isnt so bad after all.

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Show Me How You Do That Trick