REVISING AND EDITING USING RADAR

ReplaceAddDeleteandReorder

REPLACE Words that are not specific or are

neutral (i.e. good, bad, different, really, a lot, great, awesome, very, amazing, incredible)

Words that are overused or repeated Sentences that are unclear

Circle These moments, correct them and mark with an “R”

REPLACE As I ran to the finish line, my heart was

beating.

REPLACE As I sprinted to the finish line, my heart

was pounding in my chest.

ADD New information (especially supportive evidence when

you make a claim) Descriptive adjectives and adverbs (especially when

mentioning a specific literary device) Rhetorical or literary devices (connect back to the text) Transitional words/phrases in between paragraphs to

improve flow and connect ideas (also, as well as, coupled with, similarly, accordingly, as a result, however, nevertheless, in particular)

Place an “A” next to any additions you make.

ADD Shadows mad the night seem scary.

ADD Ghastly shadows made the dark night

seem even more frightening.

DELETE Ideas unrelated to your thesis Sentences that sound good, but do not

actually make sense. Repeated words or phrases Unnecessary details. Shorten overly lengthy sentences.

Cross through these moments.

DELETE The candidates talked about the issues,

and many of the issues were issues that had been on the voters’ minds.

DELETE The candidates talked about the issues,

many of which had been on the voters’ minds.

REORDER So most important points are first. To make better sense or to flow better. Begin new paragraphs/sentences to

divide up ideas.

Draw arrows to indicate reordering.

REORDER Put the sunflower seeds over the

strawberries, which are on top of the pineapple in the bowl. You’ll have a delicious fruit salad!

REORDER To make a delicious fruit salad, cut

pineapples into a bowl. Add strawberries and then sprinkle a few sunflower seeds over the top.