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Peer Mediation Training. Gibsonburg Exempted Village School District Conflict Mediation Program Working It Out Together

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  • Peer MediationTraining

  • Gibsonburg Exempted Village School District

    Conflict Mediation ProgramWorking It Out Together

  • 1. To learn that each conflict offers a chance to learn and grow when a win-win resolution is found.WHAT YOU CAN EXPECT IN TRAINING:2. To learn and practice the six stages of conflict mediation.

    3. Facilitators who give their best effort.

  • WHAT FACILITATORS EXPECT FROM YOU:

    1. Willingness to learn and pay attention.

    2. Agreement to practice non-violent conflict resolution in your own life.

    3. Follow the model of conflict mediation presented to you.

  • AS A MEDIATOR, YOU WILL:

    Help students peacefully find solutions to their conflict.Be a good school citizen who can solve problems without violence.Be an honest, trustworthy, respectful, and responsible, person.Show fairness and caring in mediation by not taking sides and showing appreciation to others.Act responsible in mediation by working hard and listening well.Maintain confidentiality about what happens in mediation sessions.

  • WHAT MEDIATORS DO NOT DO:

    Mediators do not solve problems for other students. Students with problems are responsible for their own problems and solutions.Mediators do not act as police officers. If a physical conflict occurs, mediators get involved only by getting help from an adult and following approved safety procedures.

    Keep secret information about a person who intends to harm themselves or others.

  • TALE OF TWO DONKEYS

  • PERCEPTIONS My wife and my mother-in-law

  • A photographic version of the old hag or young woman image

  • A vase or head to head?

  • Can you see a dog in this jumble?

  • What is this? A beggar or a face?

  • A male representation of the old hag / young woman

  • An Indian or an Eskimo?

  • Duck or Rabbit?

  • How many people can you see in this picture?

  • What do you see here ? A donkey or a seal ?

  • Do you see an old man or a kissing couple ?

  • Can you see the three hidden faces?

  • One face or two ?

  • Saxophone player or a woman's face ?

  • COMMUNICATION IS:What you say (15%) &How you say it! (85%)

  • Rules For Being A Good ListenerListen as if you were in the other persons place. This will help you better understand what the person is saying and how he/she feels.Show you understand and care with verbal and nonverbal behaviorTone of voiceFacial expressionsGesturesEye contactposture

  • More Rules For Being A Good ListenerRestate the persons most important thoughts and feelingsDo not interrupt, offer advice or give suggestions. Do not begin to talk about problems you have or bring up similar experiences of your own.

  • Non-Verbal Listening Skills stands for Ready and Relaxed. Good listeners clear their mind of almost everything except what the speaker is saying stands for Open. An open stance means looking like you are open to hearing what is said.

    stands for Lean Forward. To show your interest in what another person is saying, lean forward a little. Shows that you care.

    stands for Eye Contact. Eye contact shows a person that he/she is important.

    stands for Square. When sitting or standing to a person speaking with you, keep your shoulders and the rest of your body squarely facing the speaker.

  • Active Listening Techniques

  • Communication LeadsWhat I hear you sayingYou feel From your point of viewIt seems to youFrom where you standAs you see itYou believeYoure (identify the feeling: angry, sad, overjoyed, etc.)Im picking up that you

  • Having trouble perceiving clearly? Try one of these phrases!Could it be thatI wonder ifIm not sure if Im with you, butWhat I guess Im hearing isCorrect me if Im wrong, butThis is what I think I hear you sayingLet me see if I understand: you

  • Signs of Increasing Anxiety(Non-Directed)Leg JigglingHair Pulling or TwirlingFinger TappingToe TappingSquirming in seatCurling or Moving LipsClenching JawClenching Fist

  • Mediators Responses:Provide support through listening.Use tone control.Model coping strategies.Conduct a visual check of safety risks.Provide support through listening.

  • Signs of Increasing Anxiety(Directed)SarcasmIncidental name calling (ex: If he wasnt such a pig)Speed of Talking ChangesTone of Voice ChangesRefusalQuestioningStanding instead of SittingPosturing with Arms of Legs in Threatening Pose

  • Mediator Responses:Continue to provide support when appropriateIf rule violations continue or if a mediator feels uncomfortable, then call a time out. Exit the room separately using furniture and walls for safe barriers. Provide appropriate supportive limit setting (ex: I really hope you can work out this conflict here. To do so, I need to remind you of the no-interrupting rule.Adjust chair at slight angle to disputants (each mediator should do this)

  • Signs of Verbal Acting OutName Calling

    IntimidatingThreatening

    Demanding

  • Mediator Responses:Provide firm and immediate limit setting. For Example, John, one of the rules of mediation is no name calling or put downs. We need your agreement to stop name calling before we can continue.When tensions are high or the risk of physical acting out is increased, you may call a time out.

  • Signs of Physical Acting OutHittingKickingPullingClawingBiting

    GrabbingThrowing any object that is intended to harm another individual.

  • Mediator Responses:

    Observe which disputant is losing. When activity momentarily subsides, call losing disputants name and give firm command to leave the room.Developed by Ken Newbury, Ph.D.Do not attempt to pull disputants apart.Call for help and remove potentially dangerous objects in room.

  • Stage I: Introduction & Ground RulesIntroductions are madeGet VERBAL yes/no to ground rules1. Remain Seated2. No Interruptions3. Respect each other no put downsConfidentiality and Neutrality explainedExplain the 6 phasesNotes may be taken & time out may be usedAny Questions?

  • Stage II: Telling the StoryIntroduce stage twoMediators ask one disputant to: Please tell your side of the story. (mediators use active listening skills- good eye contact, acknowledge, open-ended questions, paraphrase, and thank you!)Mediator summarizes first disputants story & thanksMediator asks the disputant: How do you feel about the problemMediator reflects on first disputants feelings & thanksMediator repeats this process for second disputant

  • Stage III: Understanding the ProblemIntroduce stage threeMediators direct participants to talk to each other (keep disputants focused and within the ground rules)Ask the first disputant: What does ____ say the problem is?Ask the second disputant: Is this correct?Repeat this process with the second disputantAsk the first disputant: How do you think _____ feels?Repeat this process with the second disputantAsk: Do each of you understand how the other feels? (if either says NO, repeat stages II & III)

  • Stage IV: Identifying SolutionsIntroduce stage fourExplain that each person will come up with solutions to solve the problemAlternate asking each person for solutionsWrite down ALL solutionsIf disputants get stuck, ask, What do you need to solve the problem? or What can YOU do to help solve the problem?Read back solutions, one by one. Ask each person if they agree after you read each solution.Ask: Are there any more solutions to be added?

  • Stage V: ResolutionIntroduce stage fiveRe-read the agreementWrite down all solutions agreed upon on contractHave both parties sign the contractBoth mediators sign the contractExplain the contract will be available for review later

  • Stage VI: Departure & Follow-UpThank parties for choosing mediationTell Participants: We will follow up with you in a few days to see how your solutions are working out.Remind students about CONFIDENTIALITY!Mention Re-Mediation OptionAsk for any final questionsDepart mediation in an approved safe wayGive contract to Miss Wise and receive pass back to class

  • Personal Safety

    Conflict MediatorsNEVERget involved in aphysical conflict.

    Mediators always get helpfrom an adult.

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