Nalini Chaturvedi 2014-8-3

5/21/2018 Nalini Chaturvedi 2014-8-3

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Poetry Series

Nalini Chaturvedi

- 122 poems -

Publication Date:

August 2014

Publisher:

PoemHunter.Com - The World's Poetry Archive

Poems are the property of their respective owners. This e-book was created by Nalini Chaturvedi onwww.poemhunter.com. For the procedures of publishing, duplicating, distributing and listing of the poemspublished on PoemHunter.Com in any other media, US copyright laws, international copyright agreements andother relevant legislation are applicable. Such procedures may require the permission of the individuals holdingthe legal publishing rights of the poems.
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www.PoemHunter.com - The World's Poetry Archive

Nalini Chaturvedi (18/2/71)

I think treating/healing people is my calling.I have always been a dancea spontaneous untrained one.Still considered a star performer. Poems ncame to me until I turned 40. I was nudged into it by my very dear frieIranian poet herself ms Maya Marayam Aghamiri.But many other friendhave been encouraging me, mrs Neethu John is one of my most ardentadmirer and supporter.I always call my poems as a collection of'rhymes without a reason'. Life has been hard and tough and I guess thwhat led to my transformation into someone who enjoys penning downverses...or else i am just another ordinary soul. An Aquarius and INFP.the core. Scorpio moon sign and a Leo rising

Works:

None


3/127


43rd Birthday

This year that I turned forty 3

I think I feel now much more freeThe threshold of forty was just so greatenriching my life, to so muchI could relateBut adding 3, has furtheradded color to my tapestryLooking forward to many more yearscolors and hues to life's veneersyet to darnthere will be no tears

Nalini Chaturvedi


4/127


A Beauty Queen's World

I will see you around

when you touch the groundFor now you arelike a big bright starUp on the stageevery young heart's crazeWith such beautyand such graceyou make every heart raceNothing seems to keep you boundits just lights drama and sound..

But one dayWhen Sun goes down

And there's no moonto show you aroundWhen no one seesthat light in youEven the oneswho claimedto be trueI will be thereto hold your handA humble lanternmy dear friend

Nalini Chaturvedi


5/127


A Doctor's Dillema

A sick society gives rise to sick people

or vice versa, I still wonderOne woman is a home makerWhile other is a home breakerToday againwas my day of testFaced it unpreparedat Almighty's behestYet another beautiful girla mother, a wife, a home makerBrainwashed into submissive rolestill domestic violencehas not killed her soulHow will I ever heal her pains

when my work entails dealing withdistress at physical plainThe maintaining cause as I now seeis that 'Other woman'causing pains from adulteryThe swellings and the scarsand the bruises in her heartThat torrent of painful tearswhile her husband sat theirinjuring herwith his insulting jeers.Who gives men right to be monsters?Who ever sanctioned their special status?When all that such men do, is donate spermsThat also because its pleasureThey earn in return

Nalini Chaturvedi


6/127


A moth and a butterfly

They both follow

the same path of lifefrom egg to larvato pupa, moulting to fly

How come moth comes out uglywith no purpose in lifedestined to follow the lightget burnt by heat and die

While the colorful butterflygets to suck the nectarflowers are its benefactorsso admired by human eyes

Its not in deedsthat you get tochoose your breedbut its all in the luckthat you get to ride the wavesor get drowned, buried in muck..

Nalini Chaturvedi


7/127


Adjusting to Fit

Bound and gagged

to fit in to 'That Shoe'Today I share the painof you, little Chinese foot

Nalini Chaturvedi


8/127


Age

At this stage

my chronological ageis not a road block.But just a pebbleon the side walkThat i like to kick aroundthen just forget about itgetting lostin the woods, its noisesand the wonder ofethereal sounds....

Nalini Chaturvedi


9/127


Alive again

It has rained

No it has pouredThunderous cloudsSwept in with roars

Little rivuletsPonds and creeksCome back to lifeWith joy replete

From all the bushesSaplings, to age old treesCelebrations aboundBirds sing

with raindrops beat

I too would like toQuench life times thirstNot miss this momentOf happiness and mirth

Soaking to the coreI get drenched in the rainAs my soul savours this sapNo inhibitions to entertain

Nalini Chaturvedi


10/127


Altered reality

Maybe we don't live

In the same time zone.For your are still there in my heartAnd from your life and hearthI have long been gone

In the parallel worldsOf some galaxyWe are still togetherMay be that's what I see

I am trying to live this realityThat in this birth,On this Earth

We were not, meant to be

Mixed messagesSent out from the universeHave to ride the photonsSo much distance to traverse

Nalini Chaturvedi


11/127


And why am I still alive

Over writings on the wall

Neon colours graffiti et al.In the alleys on my heartPermanent markersCan't wipe this art

So many summersMonsoon rainsBalmy wintersSprings floral curtainI have seen it allMountains rivers and plains

So what is more

To enrich my coreTo help me growAnd open new doors

I am done withAll this strainOf living a lifeLike a puppet in chains

One day I will unshackled restrainsTell all stories, no pains to go in vain

Nalini Chaturvedi


12/127


Apathetic past

Ghosts from my past

When I was an iconoclastStill haunt me to returnFor not much is lostIn their timeless hour

Ghosts don't live in presentSo how do they knowWhat I went throughAnd in the bargainEarned too much pain

Happy memories to remind me of youAnd sad ones too

So hard to get throughI still wonder how could I be fooledTo believe in true loveAnd that hope willAlways rule

Nalini Chaturvedi


13/127


Awaiting monsoon rains

I want to touch the rainbow

so I wait for rains to comewith rising summer heatit will soon be monsoon's turn

Like sapless lifeless leavesI feel so parched and weakbut promise of impending rainsdoes ease away my pains

That smell of rain on dirtas nature gives new birthI feel the hope around methere will be no dearth of mirth

Like every yearthat has come and goneI will wait for rainslike my dried up lawn.

Nalini Chaturvedi


14/127


Baby's Smile

have you ever been smiled at

by a baby, whom even in the past,you had never metits that precious look in their eyes'I know you, together, we did fly'my heart soarswhen they giggle with delightas if we two are ever so tight

I have always,been the one to getthat loveable look,I feel so blessedfor babies and animals do love me

its mutual attraction, so don't blame meI am sure I must have met them allin previous births, that I don't recall

Nalini Chaturvedi


15/127


Brainless Beauty

Its wining and dining

with friends I see you smilingI am happy for you,

partying on weekendsis just your waybut to othersyou preachto stay away

maybe in yourmindyou havemy role well defined

where you are the queenpeople like meshould expect to stay behind

so much arroganceeven if you looksare your onlycause of pretense

maybe coupled by good luckyou thrive and enjoy for freebut nothing makes me madderwhen you open that mouthwith your senseless preachingsyou drives me up a tree

Nalini Chaturvedi


16/127


Bubble

have you seen

the bubbles floatwith rainbows on themhow they gloat

Nalini Chaturvedi


17/127


Change of life

Will soon be back to being free

To my 'original' settingWhere I will beyour forgotten historyI am trying to regain my originalityBut my every pore and cellIs infiltrated with your memory

It's just by defaultI still feel that you are mineWill take me a whileTo remember,All of that is left behind

Embarking uponthis change of lifeI have no regretsFor I have doneWhat is just rightAnd I have guTsThere was no scopeFor ifs and buts

Nalini Chaturvedi


18/127


Cremation to Creation

I hover above

An Invisible mist

While Fragrance of incenseCovers and shroudsThe place where 'I' lieAnd All that surrounds

Masking the miasmaOf the physical selfThat breaks downAs soul has long left

The air is thick

Oppressive and sickI make no soundWhile my bodyLies on the ground

Draped in white sheetThe look is completeMy nose all plugged upIt no longer breathe

It's a uniformEveryone is wearing whiteAt least for this momentThey are all dressed up right

One by one they all comeThe look on these facesIs so glumAlthough I know withinThey are happy I caved in

This crowd consists ofmedley of sortsMost to show per functionary attendanceWhile my cadaver ceaselessly rots

Relatives, who alwaysPulled the rug under meFriends who were thereIn time of my need

Some people are just hereFor they have empty livesBy delving In others sorrowCan only they thrive

Reams of peansOf things I had been


19/127


So much of praise

I hear in deaths own face

They shake their headsAs if they are in shockWhen I was aroundDid they ever take a stock

The drama of lifeReaches it's endCremated and goneJust ashes remain

Ashes then offered

To the holy riverEarthen pot on wavesGoes down stream with quiver

My soul soon seeksAnother formAs per my karmaNew dress It will don

Hence there goesthe cyclical continuationFrom tearful cremationTo joyful creation

And on the wayAs a part of the playWe run in to each otherTo learn something furtherBefore it's time to go away

Nothing is lostSo what can be foundWe have always been hereMaking our own regular rounds

Nalini Chaturvedi


20/127


Deeply Wounded

i am all over

strewn like haywicked wind's workI did try to stayI explodedin one gustits my faultthat I did trustthat ropeof faithwas justso frailit snappedto bits

in justone galenothing elseis left of meblown to smithereensend was unseen.

Nalini Chaturvedi


21/127


Delusional to Disillusioned

For the last time this time

You have hurt meNot any moreWill I let you touch meIt's over and I am goneNo more will you see meFeel me, my shadows tooWill leave you aloneI feel my heart getting heavyIt's sad it's soggy it's sappyTears waiting to tumbleAs at every memory of oursI stumbleBut this time you have

Done itAll my love for youYou have burned itPieces of my selfI try to salvagePutting them togetherWith a useless bandageFor so long I haveLoved youAnd my heart hasAlways served youBut I know. You need to replaceFor you I am no trophyBut disgraceOut of your pathAnd out of your wayI am now goneNothing moreLeft to say

Nalini Chaturvedi


22/127


Demise of Love

It came dancing with bells on

And made my heart raceIts rhythm was strongMade me dizzyWith thrill of twirlAmbrosia of love,I drankAnd every thing was blur

But when it leftIt singed my fleshHurt like shrapnel and spikesHurled at me nothingIs left

Love will always leave its traceA lifeless hollowNothing fills that space

Hollowness growsWithin you thenNo emotions, no tears, no fearsFor all your sensibilities are past tense

But one. Goes on trying to live againLeft alone in the lurchDevoid of any happiness or pain

Nalini Chaturvedi


23/127


Destructive Dominance

Too many muted cries

shut out behindthose thick doors.Too many spirits brokenby ruthless raging rogues.Marriage is a mirageto entice innocent girls,where bounties, gifts and loveget spirited, once you enter this world.Like the infamous house of candy and breadthat housed the mean witchthe one we dreadIts a predators thought out plana bobby trap to put you in chain.

Now I know why my countrysuffers in painwe have destroyed the pedestalwhere Female 'shakti' should have reignedWhat is left carcass of once what it used to beand we carry it on our shouldersproudly displaying our imbecility.

Nalini Chaturvedi


24/127


Duality

In the end

its just thehandful of sandthat little spacewhere you'llput me downmy dear friend

Or its justa palm full of ashproof of my identitynothing left of my stash

The stash of my memories

Much happiness some miseriesthe past that did not lastbut this present and the futuregradually unfurlsits plot full of mystery

so much dramaso many plansits all futileas I take a glance

but still I willplan my dayits an old habitwill not leave me anyway

Nalini Chaturvedi


25/127


Duel Within

Nothing that I do

is ever good enough for mea little voice withinties me downwheneverI am ready to fleethese mini duelsthat I fightwith Dr JekyllMr Hydetake upso muchof my timewhen being spontaneous

is just my kind

Nalini Chaturvedi


26/127


Emptiness needed

I want to be

As empty as can beDevoid of emotions andUnachievable resolutions

Where No memoriesAre stored of yesterdayAnd no floor plansOf making new forays

With no locked doorsOr latched windowsLight will flood inSo much peace will overflow

But letting goIs the first stepAnd I always fail hereFalling to depthsOf dreaded dark crack

Nalini Chaturvedi


27/127


End of Relationship

Like tress that have

grown apartalthough togetherthey weremeant to startI feel we too havefound our own landthere is no pointtrying hard to remain.

I know our rootshave enmeshedthe common soilstrong fingers clasp

every bit of spoilso when I try touproot myselfyour worldalso doesfeel the turmoil.

but it was youit was your planto wreck the bondcut me to stumpin every waymany timesyou have hurt

to save my lifesecure my soulits time for meto move ashorewhile all the oceanyou can havesail your shipsto unknown lands

Nalini Chaturvedi


28/127


Experiences et al

There is nothing left to give

for I have nothing left at allbut there is no emptiness withinand I don't feel there is famine or fall

colorful pictures of my pastand grey clouds that did overcastcast their shadows, as I walkforever with me, I know, they would last

there was a timewhen I felt ghost painspins and needles,where nothing remained

thankfully eventhat part is now gonevastness of skywill be mine from now on.

Nalini Chaturvedi


29/127


Flashbacks

Like a trip

gone crazily wildI get flash backsfrom youthand as a childthen I am transportedin that scenelike this time lapsehas never beenits been going onfor a whileIt must bethatI am stuck in past

for future and presenthard to catchrun too fast

Nalini Chaturvedi


30/127


For A Mommy To Be

That little wonder being

a sum total of you and meLittle feet little handsFluttering withintaking me to wonderlandSo much beautyand warm glowOnly a mothercould ever show

Nalini Chaturvedi


31/127


For a Shy Friend

You look so tense

holding up your shelltired and and so lostthinking shell is all you got.But shells are fragileAnd plastered smilewas never ever your styleSo put down those armslook inside your heartdo it for me pleaseI can't promise you the starsBut for sure what you find therewill be beautiful,worth sharing and a treat.

in your corelies the storeOf eternal happinessJust explore...

Nalini Chaturvedi


32/127


For My Parents

here was once

a simple seeddid not knowits worth or neednever hada chance to growothers thoughtthat it was 'slow'it was like a wingless birdnot included in the herd

so it had learn't to live alonetrying to sprout,where grass had grown

deep in jungles it felt safeno one aroundno taunt'its late'

but that seed was gardeners joyto help it sproutthey nurtured and toiledand made sureno predator would unearthsaved it from freezing wintersand long summers killing dearth

one fine day when time was rightthe seed, pushed the earthand sprouted smiling brightsoon it started reaching for skyonce that was timidtoo scared and too shy

rest is just a historywhether it grew tall or notis mystery.

Nalini Chaturvedi


33/127


Forsaken Dreams

I had once a long wish list

of things to doplaces to goevery thing clearnever covered with mist

This bucket listkept growing bigbut I realizedthat for too muchI had wishedI was meant to nest on one treenot fly around, migratory and free

so I rolled it upand sealed it in a canmade it hardto be openedby human hand

tossed it outin the open seabeyond the horizoninto eternity

I am officially wish list freedon't make plansfor dreams are not for me

maybe one dayon a lonely boata young fishermanwill find this canopen it upand read what I wrote

That will be the day

my dreamscan be freedfrom caged existenceout in the opensavoring cool sea breeze

some other personwill own them thenand then all my dreamswill come truenever to be abandonedagain in a can


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Nalini Chaturvedi


35/127


Gypsy in my backyard

Right in my back yard

In desert plainsOut In the wildernessDuring monsoon rains

I spot a herdof white wooly sheepAnd in their midstI see a colourful turban peep

Bronzed by Sun a weathered faceWhite Loin clothhe drapes with superior graceWith keen eyes attentive gaze

He scans the landfor his herd to graze

He is not another common,everyday goatherdHe's a gypsy,Comes from another world

To many lands he must have beenPrivy to secrets,of fallen and pristineThere s nothingThat he has not seen.Nonchalant monk so much at peace

All through my lazy dayIn hot blaze or rainy hazeHe takes care of his sheep and stockLest they walk away and stray

It's evening time and I can seeLittle fires lit with sticks and leavesEarthen pots on fire topsTime to eat, then stars to watch.

Wish I could just run awayFrom this world, just turn awayI am a gypsy in my heartMaybe hitch my caravanTime to make, a new start.

Nalini Chaturvedi


36/127


Gypsy Skirt

I want that very gypsy skirt

the one that makes me dance on dirtthe one that's tied with silken stringsI want the one with golden fringe

That very one with mirrors onthat shimmer and shineas I twirl alongIn hues of purple blue and pinkI 'need' that gypsy skirt I think.

This skirt that has a floral traila classy top with diaphanous veiland then you know

I'll never stopwill dance in valleysand mountain tops.

Nalini Chaturvedi


37/127


Happy Pills

They are five

they help me ridethe toughest wavesin oceans wild

They make me toughfor life is roughand I was bornwith skin not hide

they help me facethe life with graceso I don't failin this rat race

I know I am behindfrom the rest of my kindso no one holds my handsthey are in a different place and time

But my best five friendsare always there by my sideto help me deal with thingsin my own sweet time...

Nalini Chaturvedi


38/127


Harakiri.

Thank you all

For helping me decideThe way to goWrong or rightThanks a tonFor showing you despiseMy every moodMy moves, my style

Cannot thank you enoughFor showing me the wayTo take the path of deathEnding my miseries today

I feel so much at peaceFor soon I will get releaseFrom al the drama and diseaseMy soul will soon relinquishThis ugly piece of meat

Nalini Chaturvedi


39/127


Healers Story

Stories repeat

but to tell theirsPeople competeEvery day I sit inthat 'confessional' boxtrying to heal,Sometimes merely trying to detoxI am just an instrument of Godif he chooses me,I get blessings from the lot

Nalini Chaturvedi


40/127


Healing

Moons reflections

sparkle grains of sandWhile I leave my foot printssoon to be washed againEcstatic waves of oceanreaching out to creeksWhere lay the quite sea shellsnot wanting to be disturbedwhile lightly they sleepStrong and warm ocean breezeHugs me hardEmbracing me with all the zealUnwrapping all unnecessary layersIts time to unwind just my time to heal

Nalini Chaturvedi


41/127


Home of My Dreams

I love living on the Edge

dangling my feet from the ledgemy little cottage with thatched roofis certainly sadness proof

the front door opensand I can seevalley of flowersjust under my feet

From a little creekin adistance mountain peakI see it flowing

there is a big leakIts spring waters rushingfor rivers they do seek

Misty morningswind chimes callingand I cannot waitto go out strolling

Sunshine warms upwakes up the beesThey get busy workingfrom flowers to the trees

Butterflies and Birdswild flowers on the kerblittle vegetable bedsand fragrant patch of herbs

After noons melt into eveningsSoon there will be starsnight has befallenand deep slumberTakes over the dark..

Nalini Chaturvedi


42/127


Hour glass

I wait for that last grain of sand

To drop quietly in the heapSo that I can turn the glass overBefore I sleep that eternal sleep

Nalini Chaturvedi


43/127


House hunting

All that I need is a quite sanctuary

Where wilderness aboundsNo more life of drudgery.

All that I wantis to sing away my songsWith the birds and bees and cricketsAnd I know no humans would throng.They would not survive the thicket

Just a handful of earth,And an armload of skyI will rebuild my nestWith no one else's rules to comply

If I can't get thisThen I will hideIn the ocean watersWhen the tide is high

And in the deep seaI'll finally resideIn an empty shellSpend the rest of my life

Nalini Chaturvedi


44/127


Hurt

Yes! I will continue

to laugh smile.For my sadnessis now sterileBut if you spot the sadness in my eyesyou know that truth is hard to hide

Nalini Chaturvedi


45/127


I am the Zee

For so long,

I have been the QOf no valuewithout U.

Relearningto be the ZZipping fastthe painful pastFlying freeFor nothing lasts

Nalini Chaturvedi


46/127


I Belong To No One

The feeling you have

just before you are about to unshackle all the tiesstart planning for life, devoid of lieswhere you have time to spend with yourselfno more dressing upor stressing outno more deadlinesto waste your timeThen its year longSummer times.

Yes! I am earning it allfor I am breaking these wallsthat have confined me

and tried to define meBack to where I am from,The Sun, the Seas and Earththat welcomes life giving rainstorms

Soon i will be a nobody againin the process will haveso much more to gain

Nalini Chaturvedi


47/127


I have to dance today

I know have to dance today

its the rhythm in my headthat wants me to movea beat that's so loudThat there is no wayI can mute

I have not heard this tune beforeI know I want to savor it to the coreand the only way I have knownis to be led in trance all alone

every music, beats or wordslyrical voices, turn my world

into heaven here on earthand here I am burning all that hurts

look at me so mesmerizedsee that twinkle, in my eyesfor dancing means so much to meits my language, my poetry....

Nalini Chaturvedi


48/127


I still love you

I have always loved your curls

That charming smileI got drunk on that wineI also have loved your deep brown eyesThick eyelashes your dreamy styleI fell in love with square jaw lineYour broad shoulders, I could reclineI am also not ashamed to sayI love your fragrance, in natural way

But your good looksNow seemSmoke screenTo hide all your hate

That aversionYou have for me

It's alrightThat I lovedJust onceIn life

It had to be youTo teach meThat I could tooLove someoneMore than my lifeAnd forget my own pleasuresFor the sake of that smile

Nalini Chaturvedi


49/127


Identity

I don't fear getting broken again,

crushed into pieceswashed away with monsoon rain.All that I fear is to be foundlittered in a drain.And then being put togetherin someone else s fancy frame.So just brake meand spread me aroundlet my soul be freein a body never bound

Nalini Chaturvedi


50/127


Ignorance Revisited

Everything around, will eventually change

Everything that's right, will one day be strangeEvery one alive, will soon be lost in the dustSo why do I attempt, to protect iron from rust

All these mindless actionsthat drive me awayfrom that One real perfectionare ridiculous reactionsto my own faulty perceptions

My inability to seeto feel, to sublimatein to absolute reality

and I continue to sufferforever in eternity

Nalini Chaturvedi


51/127


Imagination

I never needed an anchor

to hold me downall I wantedwas that wavethat could carry me around

The rules that you etched in stoneI could never ownThe ones I wrote on shifting sands of timeYes, they are all mineI dont discover new landsJust invent new ones

Nalini Chaturvedi


52/127


Impending Doom

the fear of known is worse

than the fear of unknownI do know where my ship is sailingand I know its doomed to be sinkingI see my end, as I blend in the sandbut there is nothing there that I can do

Nalini Chaturvedi


53/127


India Vs Pakistan

let us go ahead

and competefor the mood isso upbeat

While India hasthe minors rapedkilled and hangedwhy were they maimed?it was the copsnot goons or crazedmakes me madand so enraged

Twin Pakistanis also proudfor killing a girlpregnant butnot devout.They stoned herIt had to behonor killingsmakes societyblasphemy free

While these girlssuffered in painonlookers justhad no disdain.

In the endwho got to win?Who is the onewith bigger sin?

which of the menare bigger brutes?Where against crueltyno one shouts.

How much longerit has to be?before my sisterswill forever be free?

raped and maimedkilled and blamedhas to endhas to endhas to end..

Nalini Chaturvedi


54/127


Industrial Summer

Peak of Indian summers

and Sun singes every beingwith its piercing hot rayslast bit of sap,sipped up from grass blades

mighty inferno,its flames now surroundspiking high fever,forcing us to be home bound

Its that time of the yearwhen everything burns,turns crazed

while creatures run for coverlooking for that very shadethat has been lostfor all the treesto the groundhave been razed

Thirsty little beaks,looking for one last dripfrom the roadside tapfor water is now a treat

a couple of stray puppiesalong with their loving mothersearching for a puddleand a cooler placewhere they can take some cover

a malefic cloud of coalenvelops this little townwhere everything burns like cindersand clean water befouledby industries around

no more patches of green

its a concrete and cement scenewhy are we building our own hellfor soon there will be none leftlife wiped out, under this horrific spell.

Nalini Chaturvedi


55/127


Just Ordinary

somewhere in the middle of that bell curve

I find my place, for me its reservedthey are many all aroundnothing special to be foundi am happy to be one of the treesin this wilderness of foreststo be exotic, is not my cup of tea..

Nalini Chaturvedi


56/127


Karmic lessons

So many scripts

So many tripsSo many skinsThat I haveLived in.

Too many lessonsTo be learntBefore I detachMyself from Earth

The very beingI loved so muchIs now averse

To my face my touch

The very place I want to beNow is too farAn untraceable dream

Nalini Chaturvedi


57/127


Learning To Detach

I am learning to realize

that world is just a stageWhere I am just performingbut not for a prize or raiseIts this feeling I now and then getthat soon it will be time to goAnd I should not be sadfor towards the ocean my boatI will rowI feel so light todayTo feel this sparkling rayfor I know I do my bestand rest I let go away.Maybe this is what growing up is all about

Nalini Chaturvedi


58/127


Lessons

Some pains

that drive me insanealso teach meI am aliveon many plains.Walking barefootis not my dealbut when I have toits a different feelAs if my solecan feel so muchhardness of the groundsquishy of the mulchEvery single part

that hits thehot summer sand,is a lesson in patienceto see how muchI can withstand.That is just how feelwhen people come my waycompletely rude and rustichard hearted or cast aways.Like different notes of musicthese people hold a placehelping my soul to growAnd I can win the race

Nalini Chaturvedi


59/127


Living In a Dew Drop

I want to live my life

in a freshly formed dew drop.

In the mist of the nightwith the moon shining brighton a welcoming leafI want to dropand take a slide.

Carefully thenbut withouta prior plantouch thesilken cheeks

of newly bloomedwater lilies

Gazing aroundI relishthe quietnessof the townFeeling securein this prismaticsurround

But when in timethe night has to retreatand the new dawn breakswith chirping and tweetsIts time for me to leaveI knowmy fate has no reprieve

Life was shortbut it was sweetthat's what countsso don't miss menor should you weep

Nalini Chaturvedi


60/127


Living In The Slow Lane

I want to retreat

physically and emotionallyjust escape downsome unknown backstreet

Too much noisedisturbs my poisethe world aroundtoo fast paced, much soundand I am trapped in the midst.

Dizzy and derangedtired and painfully chainedLet go off my hand

for this speed I cannot stand.

Adrenaline rush that fuels your thirstnow I have none, and I am on the runIts time for me to goplease don't stop me any more.

Nalini Chaturvedi


61/127


Lone Gypsy

A Bedouins call to another nomad

Time to pack up on camels backIts that time of the yearThat we have to all leave from hereTo settle again in some mirage landThe majestic shapes that fill landscapesThat yearning for oasis on most hardy trailsthey are the panacea for nomadic soulsAway from sand dunes there are no stories to be toldRooted to a places is not meant for meI am a Nomad, and that sets me free...

Nalini Chaturvedi


62/127


Lost

Too many sunny days have been wasted

Searching in the bales of hayToo many sleepless nights have goneAnd I have still not found my way

Nalini Chaturvedi


63/127


Lost Faith

Pristine Pagodas powerful place

where miseries of massesmelts away with divine grace

I wish to havethat place within mewhere I can returnneed no sanctuary

I need to reinstallin me that long lost faiththe one I had oncebut has gone adrift..

Nalini Chaturvedi


64/127


Lost forever

My little paper boat

my little paper boatwas made of blue paperin turquoisemy name i wroteIt was made with lot of lovenow its gone undiscoveredsunken deep in some unknown world

Nalini Chaturvedi


65/127


Lost Home

Things have changed

so much all aroundthat I have lost my homein some unknown townand so now no hometown for meand I am officially a vagabond gypsy queen

Nalini Chaturvedi


66/127


Love

Every time I look at you

I know I am in loveeven now when I hear your voiceI know I am in loveI know I can read your silenceand yes this surely is loveyour presence still puts me in a tranceheady magnetism to your tunes I danceI am lucky to be in love

Nalini Chaturvedi


67/127


Love Letters on Leaves

Some love letters

On leaves during the fallI had sent them with windsDid you get them at all

I know it was already springWhen birds got them on their wingsMaybe you saw themBut you never cared at all

For you could pick and chooseIn gardens, wilderness and every whereOf fresh flowers and leavesYou already had your share

And in the summer heatWhen woods become timber boxMy letters got burntBut my love still exist,Not spirited or lost

Nalini Chaturvedi


68/127


Loveless lass

I do still remember that day

The day when I was wonder struckTo see you promise me heaven and earth

I still remember that lovelorn lookThe one I saw on your faceAnd the place where I stoodFealt like tremors, it rattled and shook

Was it all a part of dreamDid you never truly love meAnd what I sawWasShort lived like bubbles or

Vanishing vaporised steam

Why did it ever have to endMy lifetime of loveWill you ever understand

Nalini Chaturvedi


69/127


Magical MELANCHOLIA

Today I heard the bold echo of lightening

And I saw the reflections of thunder,they were frighteningToday I felt singeing pains of raindropsWhile the arch of rainbow,I saw scattered on leaves as dew drops

For others it was a regular dayBut something changed within me some way

Today it must be a blessed dayWhen I could feel the natures wayNo rules of humans come to playWhen nature rules, we are humbled away

Nalini Chaturvedi


70/127


Masks

Masks I wear are not for charade

but to help memake my life less hardthey save me from, all the hurtsI don't need the Armoura shield or automatic guns

I don't need, no pepper spraysor those high tech laser raysthank God for my irrelevancemade no bunkers to get away

but yes! I havesome other ways

that do help meto hide awayfrom predatory eyeswho think I am their prey

masks that I wearof various emotionshave proved to bea good solutionpolished well withall that fake sheento hide my very real selfmingling well,with other goods on the shelfso that the real meis always unseen

Nalini Chaturvedi


71/127


Maverick Me

I try hard to keep it under wraps

my quaint identity,protecting myself from trapsI try my best to mix aroundto be camouflagedbe one with the back groundBut its this strangeness that I havethat is an eyesore, none can forget.The way I laugh, I walk and dressmy random thoughts, my challenging betsthe points of view, that no one getsthis genuine openness, too much for the restYes! I am just made from the dirtPotters mold, shaped me from earth

And rest of you are plastic dollsPorcelain made, just not my sortSo we separate like water and oiland I stay away, least your day, I do spoil

Nalini Chaturvedi


72/127


Medicated Mind

My prescription drug

has made me a slugTo be a sleeping beautyseems to be my only dutyI know I am angryThere is some aching painwhich part of me now suffersIs very hard to ascertainUntil I come to gripswith the reality of my lifeI know I am doomed to sufferI will have no stable respite

Nalini Chaturvedi


73/127


Mother Earth, s message

It's that time of the year

When earth has to be ploughedPrepared to be turned over,and new seeds have to be sowedIt's part of its lifeTo bear this changeNo matter how much painIt entails to be endured.

Soon there will be monsoon rainsTrying their best to beat the heatHelping Mother Earth to regainIt's faithin what Almighty has preordained

Behind every pain, that we undergoIs a thought out plan, for new saplings to growFor each one of us is a fertile plainThat needs to be preparedFor the larger gain

And now every time my life gets insaneI know I have been chosenTime for me to workAnd forget to be a fallow land

Nalini Chaturvedi


74/127


My Letter to Almighty

If it wasn't meant to be

Then why did you have toplay this game with meIf you are the one who plans it allthen why in a mazeI got lost and did fallI am now as broken as can befragmented piecesnever fit backas they ought to besome parts of mehave chipped awayand been lostso rest of me now

looks like a caricature of sorts

Nalini Chaturvedi


75/127


My Song

Hold on for a little long

For In my head there is a songDying to be freed from the clutches of these lipsWaiting for me to strum with finger tipsI need safe spaceTo rest my caseand then full throttlewill make your hearts race

Nalini Chaturvedi


76/127


My unjust God

At this rate at which

I am being deniedMy basic wantsand simple delightsI will stop collecting lucky charmsNo lucky pennies, horse shoesOr blessed amulets on my arms

This is called revelationNo more waiting in anticipationFor God must have his own good reasonsI am not upset, but I question himFor the treasons.

Another day of being rejectedTo self evaluation being subjectedAm I your favourite punching bagOr a straw stuffed, doll made of rags.

No more hot temper or self destructive angerJust a cold spiteful fury, in my heart I do nurtureTime and again you have given me painAs to why you hate me so muchCan you sit down and please explain

For you are The GodAnd I am notWhat is it you want from meThat you have not already got

Nalini Chaturvedi


77/127


My Wondrous Dream

Surrounded by mountains

Clouds hiding their peaksI feel so much at homeThIs floral valley, heart. seeks

Tiny rivuletscrisscross the groundTheir trickling voicesSo much joy unbound

Tweeting and chirpingGathering leaves and sticksThese little birdsHave their nests to fix

Waft of cool breezeHeightens my sensesSo many fragrancesPerformingMix and match dances

I too join inHumming own soulful songsFor the longest timeI have been so forlorn

Hearing me singMighty Mountains would beginReverberating Echoes of my voiceI hear music all around

Breathless with exhilarationI fight my temptationTo stay here foreverAnd never be gone

But it's just a dreamA virtual worldWith wondrous theme

It's time to wake upFace the world 'sReal scene

Nalini Chaturvedi


78/127


Nemesis

As I was thrown

MercilesslyOn the groundTiny piecesOf me, fell all around

Dragged by my hairMy mind replays thisHorrific night mareWaking me upI am surely dumbfound

Curses and bruisesAll hope my heart looses

In place of love and hopeSplinter of sadness, very tightlyI do grope

Drop by dropI am bleeding painBest is all lostLittle left to regain

Monstrosity of your blowsLike a boomerang,will take recourseNow Your life will be full of woes

Nemesis will catch up with youNalini

Nalini Chaturvedi


79/127


Never ending Circle of Domestic violence

you must have felt like a real man

when you grabbed my hairpushed me downdragged me over on the concrete ground

it must have been so empoweringfor you to see me quiver and screamabusing me making me feel like shityou never leave a chance to do your bit

for everything gone wrong in your lifeits easy for you to target me out of spiteI wish this happened to your own familyyour mother and your sister faced the same misery

but God almighty is there to seethe curses of my soulwill never leave any of you free

i am numbed and I am lostI cannot react I cannot talkI treat the ailments of others familybut look at meI am broken beyond any existing therapy

Nalini Chaturvedi


80/127


Never ending Circle of Domestic Violence II

you have shown me again once more

that you don't need me any morethat you will hurt me, if I stirredfor all the worst things u have utteredto say I am useless and I am crazyjust goes on to show how your vision is hazy

Its my bad Karma coming back to mefor I trusted you and you, while you are sadistas bad as can be

Nalini Chaturvedi


81/127


Never ending Circle of Domestic Violence III

There is never a time to heal

life keeps getting worse,I do not know how to dealfor I am just a mere humannot a robot made of lifeless steelno one cares and no one daresand no one will ever be thereI know I am going to fly away freewhen death happens, end of miseryI do look forward for my time to gogood bye to these tears,good bye to sorrows.

Nalini Chaturvedi


82/127


Never ending Circle of Domestic Violence IV

there will be no send off smile

no more looks of forlorn eyesonce again getting ready to leavehow many more timesto get hurt and to bleed..

Nalini Chaturvedi


83/127


No more gifts for me

I live in a land of perpetual surprise

where I have receivedmany blessings in disguiseall the emotional litterthat you find around mecame from all the wrappersfrom gifts I received for free.

so much junk of wrappersis more than my storage placenot recyclable or biodegradableIts highly combustible and unpredictableSo maybe its time to move out to new place

Maybe I will load and relocateto a place, where I will finda little more fun, a lot more solaceFor once I don't want to learn any new lessonsjust practice on the ones I have done well in so far

Nalini Chaturvedi


84/127


Not your family too

Thank you mom

For letting me knowI mean nothingJust an irritantFor you

Forsaken by spouseI came back to your houseSoon to realiseI am unwelcomeA pest a louse

I will soon be gone awayPapa and you in peace

Can then stay

Hopefully soonMy life too will endRest of your livesWill be smoothWith no bends

Nalini Chaturvedi


85/127


Ode to The Children of The World

So much strength

So much loveSo much laughterAnd much more trust

Happiness liesIn their innocent smilesFresh perspectivesUntouched by lies

They don't judgeHold no grudgeSensitive perceptiveBring magic back to Earth.

Nalini Chaturvedi


86/127


Ode To The Healers

Physicians are doctors

researchers are toolets have a new namefor healersthat are few

Nalini Chaturvedi


87/127


Pains with no gains

There are places

That hurt so badIt's been a whileThat I was thrashedBy some one I loved the mostBut he took out the most in meA vacuum, a cavity, a spaceWhere all my emotionshave been buried in their grave

Nalini Chaturvedi


88/127


Parting words to soon to be Ex husband.

I will never be alone

For now I am one with the treesYou will hear me singWith the cool monsoon breezeSo go ahead my friendAs you tread slowly on quick sand

Nalini Chaturvedi


89/127


Poisoned

my whole world and life crumbles around

there is no noise, there is no sounda slow deterioration of all land scapenothing can now save my place

I too am slowly sinking in quicksandno one to give me a helping handI feel myself shrinking in size and shapefor you poisoned me, and there is no escape

Nalini Chaturvedi


90/127


Politically correct death

For you my death

That I havePlanned aheadIs not honourableFor I am no soldierWearing Samurai hat

No Harakiri or kamikazeFor meMere suicideWill help mySoul to be free

I am no one

You are one moreTo have shownSo how does it matterFor in the endI will be gone

Politically correctI know I might not beBut I too wish to embrace deathWith all my dignity

Nalini Chaturvedi


91/127


Power of Ordinary

Ordinary lives

ordinary peopleordinary smilesSimple upheavalsNot much do they asklike worker antsbusy doing their tasks.

But don't underestimatethe power of ordinaryFor when time comesthey'll make historylike cannon ballsor tsunami walls

they can bring downBig castles, forts tall

For ordinary is justa simple shellInside of whichlie unusual spellsThose magical wordsthat we have unheardBut very well cangive birth to new worlds

Nalini Chaturvedi


92/127


Prayer

Those multiple pair of eyes

sick, sad and lostlooking at me for replies

they scare me!my littlenessand helplessnessin my facestares me

I try my bestto heal them allhelp me Godto treat them all

for I am justa humble beingif you work through meto health,I will steer them all

once again todayat your feet I prayto hold my handso that I can standin turn on methey can depend

Nalini Chaturvedi


93/127


Predator and Prey

The vultures are landing

they come in hordesthey had been waitingwhile hunters, killed scores

Yes! they had been watchingfrom their vantage pointencoring the wild gameof depraved and deprived

so many of themhave been decimatedso farbrutal savagery

leaving generationalscars

tearless acceptancehelpless despondencewhat more to loosewhen they had no chance

So Vultures,why make those speechesin cacophony of your'swhen you just wantedfor hunters to get more

news channels alsoflash lights on these landswhere they will be surrenderto darkness again...

girls will be abductedwomen will be killedearth will be mauledwhile predators will be thrilled...

Nalini Chaturvedi


94/127


Psychedelic Dreaming

I want to get magnetized

Electrified and atomizedSpread around with a burst of lightCombusting inertia getting energizedElectric blues makes everything rightNo more 3 dimensional lifeTo other plains, I take my flightNo up or down or traveling aroundJust melt away, where mysteries abound

Nalini Chaturvedi


95/127


Questions

Troubled by turmoil

humanity, stilltries its best to toilSo much of turbulencein airSo hard to plant your feetin soilOpposing forces pull apartthis gap just keep on getting largeSo where did love and peace escapeand how did we reach this hell's old gateSo lonesome, lifeless bereft of joysI trip myself at senseless ploys.

Nalini Chaturvedi


96/127


Rainless clouds

On the Eastern sky

As the evening befallsIn the dusk and the star lightMuted lightening surprises us all

No sound of thunderNo smell of rainWonder why is it hereCan you help and explain

Have the clouds been so lonelyThat they have cried out all tearsNo one heeds to their outburstsLightening helps them, face all fears

Rainless cloudsOver desert plainsOh wispy wanderersPlease give back our rains

Nalini Chaturvedi


97/127


Restoration

I am fine,

To cross all linesSince you are goneThere are fewer waysTo be defined

It will take a whileEven to walk a mileWithout your handHeld in mine

I am chipped offA bit damagedA broken heart

Is never exchanged

I will still sayThat I am fineFor no one caresThere is no time

Nalini Chaturvedi


98/127


Revelation

Dont be afraid to explore black hole

For in its belly the world's light is storedWhen you are drenched in all the light that you wantWhy back to earth would you come out

Nalini Chaturvedi


99/127


Righteous Rich.

Stunted by their petty greeds

They can't see beyond their needsSuffering from an endless lustWhere will they go, when this bubble would burst?Wealthy, wasteful and eruditeBut within so poor despiteTraveled countries near and farStill so blind, to their own land's scars

They live here, to rip it offWith these treasuresOne day will take offNation building is their themeBut double crossing, is their scheme

Politicians, bureaucrats, intellectuals with big headsBusinessman of unworthy means, terrorists and gangster creedYou all look the same to meIts 'you' vs 'us' where ever I see

So away, from multitudes noiseFalse promises in fake voiceSilken clothes and diamond ringsYou don't care for the ones on the fringe

On a lone rock close to the seaI see you party so carefreeI don't know how will this endFragile castles I make in beach sand

Nalini Chaturvedi


100/127


Runaway Mode

Like a reclusive raccoon

that returns with the moon.Or the diligent silk wormthat hides in its cocoon.I like to feellife's tapestrywhile others are awayno distractions around me.In this dense forest of humansI hardly find clear landand whenever I do,I make a shrine in sand.For sacred is that place,where people have not been

just nature untouched by vile handsand birds still sing on treesHow hard it is todayfor me to find my wayback to the silent sanctuaryleaving masses far away.

Nalini Chaturvedi


101/127


Sailing away

I have stacked stores

My pair of oarsA sailors mapShowing seas and shores

I sit afloatIn My paper boatA blue rain coatOf which I gloatAnd I am setNeed nothing more

Now all I need isTide to come in

And I will be goneAll set to win

Nalini Chaturvedi


102/127


Save the Child...in Your Heart

In everybody's heart

from birth untilits time to departlives a little childalways ready to go wildspontaneous infectious smilesgiggles that seem so puerileheadthat's up to naughty pranksheartthat cares two hoots for ranksthese are the very essence of that childthe flame of youthmakes living worth your while.

so why do we want to tamefor reasons that sound so lamethe very seed of joyusing vindictive ploys.hence, every single dayin as many hearts I mayI try to nurture that childto make it feelits alright to havea facade of steelbut never give upthat child withinthat craves to livewith joy and zeal

Nalini Chaturvedi


103/127


Season II of My Life

Please show me the way

light up my pathno more I want to stray

No idioms and proverbsor riddles that unnerveJust plain and simple plotsno more life's painful retorts

I stand lost, alone and repentmy mouth full of dry sandNo more running aftermirages grandgive me

just a green piece of landfriendly oasis to befriend

Long days, hard wintersnightmaresof me being torn asunderthese are things I fear the mostso to happiness, I raise a toast

Lively thoughts,bounce in my stepsSong on my lipstime upfor penance.

Nalini Chaturvedi


104/127


Seed

I want to go back and become a seed

Suspended animation is the state to beFor now my road to 'The End' seems utterly longand I have run out of scripts and songs to take alongmy untamed self lost in the unplanned routesIts all so tedious and I am not strong

Nalini Chaturvedi


105/127


Separation. Anxiety

Are all our pictures

Part of your liesWe're all those sweet wordsMeant just as a jibeWas it all imaginaryCreation in my headThe. Emotions I saw in your eyesWere of love mummifiedAnd long before I knewThey were. Dead

Nalini Chaturvedi


106/127


So confused

So much in life

Goes just unexplainedOr maybe my insightIs based on limitations of my brain

No easy lessonsFor people like meTurmoil and treasonsOverflow my inventory

Is it a carry overfrom my deeds of past lifeOr a crash courseTo prepare for future of strife

Nalini Chaturvedi


107/127


Songs of Ocean

Hold the sea shell

to your earsFrom withinwhat songsdo you hearIts the oceanand its roarcaught in its heartdeep in its core

No longer lyingin the sea bedbut still this shellhas nothing to regret

For empty handedit had not leftBrought alongtreasure so perfectSongs of oceantimeless jewels..

Nalini Chaturvedi


108/127


Spurious spirituality

Innocence once lost

Is never regainedYou can never undoDamages doneand the pains

Throw out all thosebooks of spiritual claimsOnes that promise false paradiseIf you follow their monastic trail

Love and devotionare. Outdated notionYour days are numbered

You will soon reach extinction

Hedonistic headsAlways bask in SunshineCarnal pleasuresLeads to Pleasures divine

If this is the wayThat it has to beI'll try y bestTo change my elementMy individuality

Nalini Chaturvedi


109/127


Stars For Stars

Wish i could

steal a handfulof sparking bright stars,make a little bouquetor plant them close to flowers.For flowers will dry upwither and gobut stars will remind youevery day, I love you more.Incandescent iridescenthappy or sadStars will staythey'll always be present.Lightning you way

today, tomorrow,and forever my friend.

Nalini Chaturvedi


110/127


Stoned by sadness

Like a strong gale

Or destructive hailThe high tide of sadnessMade me tremble and feel so frail

I pursed my lipsClosed my eyesLest the tearsMade the tides further rise

Then I firmed myselflike a lifeless rockGrounded and unmovedWhile the storm, laughed at me

And mocked

With all my miteI stayed uprightTurbulence of tornadoesI know I could fight

Soon I will metamorphosisTurn into a stoneDon't be surprisedAt this tone

For a lifeless formCan only faceAll these stormsWith unwavering grace

Nalini Chaturvedi


111/127


Street Children

They throng my car

At red light as I stopBegging for almsThere I see a whole crop

Curious little facesThey peak inside the carFor a moment they forget to begWondering if one dayThey too could be at par

These are street childrenCalled urchins by allBut how did they happen

Who's fault is it, after all.

They sleep on pavementsWear tatters for raimentsThe invisible future of nationHow easily we forgetThey also are Gods creation

Impoverished existenceLife will never give them,second chanceLiving on the fringeFrom their mere touch,we cringe

When they entered this worldNobody celebrated, no body heardBut they have survivedDespite all the abuses and hurtHats off to these angelsMade of pure blessed earth

Weathering with the strong summer heatAnd living through winters bone chilling coldHave they ever learnt to dream

Or they don't need toSince their destiny, is etched in bold

From rag pickersTo tea stall workersScrubbing the train compartmentsSubservience has many colours

Self righteous peopleThe ones like you and meDisregard them as another pile of trashFor they want money for free


112/127


With a mere wave of hand

We shoo them away with such pretenceAs if they were not humansBut non beings or fleasNot shameful of our belligerence.

As I sit mourningWasting my time in self pityI feel so smallSmaller than 'your' identity

God almighty give me chanceAnd strength to help their lotMay be that will cleanse my sins

If you make me your instrument of sorts

Nalini Chaturvedi


113/127


Summer Rains

Out of nowhere

in the middle of the dayCame an army of cloudshiding Sun's pierce raysWhat a pleasant surpriseto smell that earthy scentas drops of rain sprinkledcool breeze followed them as wellThese mid summer rainsAre rare jewels in desert and plains

In such a long timeI too could look upfor sun didn't seem the fiend

I had to ignore and snub

Akin to summer rainsthere are angleswho embalm your painsThey come in form of peoplehelp you believe in yourself againJust like raindrops on parched landsgives out scentto never be forgotten in vainThe memories of such friendshelp you stand up and walk againNo matter how many times you falland this world acts inhumanly insane....for my very dear friend whom I have beenmissing ever so often.....for you Maya Maryam Aghamiri....

Nalini Chaturvedi


114/127


Sun Burns

Scorching heat of summer

More than bright Sun raysAnd the magic is goneFrom fresh spring time hazeBaby pink fresh soft frondsNurtured bythe humming bird songsWeathered and dried upLifeless for longParched EarthWith cracked mudBarren and deadThe seed lost its trustNow it seems

I tracked a mirageChased the SunGot lost at lastThere is noComing back for meI climbed the sun-raysAnd scorched my history

Nalini Chaturvedi


115/127


Sunscreen

My lawn

shows patches of greenwith dried up yellow spotsthat needed better sunscreen

Nalini Chaturvedi


116/127


Surprise Gift

I was never thought of

as a person of many wordsNeither ever considereda respectable nerdBut life just pushed me aroundso muchthat one day I found myselffallen badly in the dirt.It was funny as can befor I had bump on my headas I landed from a treeThat was the daymy malady did startof penning these verses

wonder how long will it last.This synchronicity of thoughtsthat makes me write awayIs something that I lackdealing with reality per se.Is it my alter egomy evil twin at work.Do I have split personalitythat no one has ever heard?

Nalini Chaturvedi


117/127


Survival Skills

No one will ever understand you

if they can, they would rather hurt youso do not give too much credenceto any love, it makes no sense.

just take care of few, as your dutybut still keep a part of you, untoucheduncontaminated free of false security.

the very core that makes you uniqueif you want to preservelet it not be exposed to critiqueno one should have an access to your corethat should be your place, a secret cove

no father mother husband or wifebrother or sister, can get your strifeno friends can always be by your sideand rest of the world is as it is wild

so don't be afraid to be alone,your life on Earth is on loanand once your debts get fully paidjust be ready to be gone.

Nalini Chaturvedi


118/127


The 100th

Layers after layers of dark ominous clouds

Blocking the sun,Moon wrapped in shrouds

Dark clouds that blazeWith lightening, s sharp bladeThunder is its accompliceDo not fear the dust storms rage

These monsoon Clouds,Are welcome and a treatWhen sun has parched the earthAnd moon can't beat the heat

Life too has moments that are greySad and weepy like a rainy dayBut don't forget that these scary cloudsHave hidden rainbows, on them we can count

Someday one dayI too will knowWhy things happened toMe this'd way

Nalini Chaturvedi


119/127


The End

I often wonder

how will that moment beWhen from this bodymy soul breaks freeThat nano secondbetween life and deathHow does one definethat moment of last breathWill I be sick, a tired old hagOr will leave quickly, packing upall my bags....And I just wonderhow will that last moment beWhen I will gone

breaking all shackles, free.

Nalini Chaturvedi


120/127


The Little Mermaid

Shunned by many

Snubbed by moreThere was this awkward girlWho could not swim ashore

So she turned away her backTo the rest of the worldTook a deep dive in the seaAbout her no one heard

Days and weeksTurned in to yearsThen one dayA sailor steered

His little shipTowards a rockAnd want he saw thereGave him a pleasant shock

For what he sawWas a little mermaidAn angelic faceOnce shunnedBy rest of the race

Sometimes it helpsTo be cast awayTo be left aloneEnjoying solitary space

For no one knowsWhat future holdsMaybe best of all the worldsAs you travel with the rainbowsTo find that pot of gold.....nalini

Nalini Chaturvedi


121/127


The Never Ending Cycle of Domestic Violence I

you must have felt like a real man

when you grabbed my hairpushed me downdragged me over on the concrete ground

it must have been so empoweringfor you to see me quiver and screamabusing me making me feel like shityou never leave a chance to do your bit

for everything gone wrong in your lifeits easy for you to target me out of spiteI wish this happened to your own familyyour mother and your sister faced the same misery

but God almighty is there to seethe curses of my soulwill never leave any of you free

i am numbed and I am lostI cannot react I cannot talkI treat the ailments of others familybut look at meI am broken beyond any existing therapy

Nalini Chaturvedi


122/127


Ultimate Alloy

Welded and molded

Petted and scoldedBelligerent and boldBeen throughExtreme heat and coldMixture of metalsAn alloyWill fight all battlesBattles big and smallWhere poor will riseEmpires would fallThat is what has happened to meFrom one single metalI am a wonder of alchemy

Nalini Chaturvedi


123/127


Unfound Peace

The Zen of getting in The Zone

Its a pity, I have not yet knownin these movementsthat are fakeno room for silencedo I makedispersing myselfall aroundconsciousness plundereddarkness found..

Nalini Chaturvedi


124/127


Unlearning

Learning to unlearn

Trying to not loveMelting all memoriesInto a shapeless bulk

Forgetting all the painsImpossible senseless gamesThat we together had won and lostTo amnesia, I raise a toast

Will soon be a blank slateTo which no one can relateMy soul just left aloneTo sing that unheard song

Nalini Chaturvedi


125/127


Unveiling

Epiphany of sorts

when in my writing notesI find answersRhythm of the drumsattunes meto all that is to learnCreativity helps me reconnectwith the rest of the living lot...Epigenetics of my soulso many life times to decodeglimpses of the pastI see them flicker but they do not lasthence remain, Yet untoldFor Unfurling of the scrolls

Might reveal all my past rolesI need that healingGot to rid this feelingThat I have committed same mistakesometime not long before.And then I will be on my road to true recoveryIts somewhere hidden in the cloudThe poems I had writtenby mistake forsakencould not even sing them aloud

Nalini Chaturvedi


126/127


Veiled Voices

You hide your own vulnerabilities

behind my thick dark veilsfor you know I am the strong oneand you the one who's frail

This veilthat covers my full formlike solders dressed up in uniformwe are meant to look alikebut for the practiced eyesthere is so much to decipherIndividuality crushed heartlesslybehind these coverall styles.

So many aspirations,emotions and expectationsthat have been shut out.for fear of your destructioncaused by volcanic eruptionseruptions from free thoughtsthat have been sealed under pressurebut have never ever been lost

Caged in this piece of clothI have no identity to boast ofAn unremarkable silhouetteCondemned to live as back drop

I do have a voicethat you have mutedby your choiceBut if you ever knewThere are songs of revolutionHidden behind quite poise.

You know of my strengthAs mother, sister, wifeDaughter and friendYou also know of my weakness

That in loving lays my essence.

But soon you all will seeWe will be blooming ever so freeTherell be sisterhood of fragranceAs we break fake rules of dominanceAnd pretentious suffocating peace

Nalini Chaturvedi


127/127

Where do the unwept tears go

Where do the unwept tears go

The ones that never brimmedTo the eyes the ones that are silentlyBrushed ashore

Much before the barrages overflowedAnd the deluge destroyedEvery happiness storedDid they all get soaked in to the soilOr with the tidal waves do they roar

Nalini Chaturvedi

Nalini Chaturvedi 2014-8-3

Text of Nalini Chaturvedi 2014-8-3

Profile- Prof. SARPV Chaturvedi

Load Balancing in Distributed Systems Nalini Venkatasubramanian [email protected]

CONTENTS Profit & Loss Account BOARD OF …...CONTENTS BOARD OF DIRECTORS Shri Jaykishor Chaturvedi Shri Siddharth Chaturvedi Ms. Nupur Chaturvedi Shri Pradeepkumar K. Sharma AUDITORS

ALOK R. CHATURVEDI

INFANT FEEDING AND HIV Dr KANUPRIYA CHATURVEDI Dr. S.K. CHATURVEDI

Mohnish Chaturvedi Marc Jordan

Introduction (Nalini)

Revisiting Shakuntalam - Girdharilal Chaturvedi

Vulnerability of Women & Children to HIV/AIDS DR. KANUPRIYA CHATURVEDI DR. S.K. CHATURVEDI

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NALINI PATTANAYAK

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Nalini Chaturvedi 2014-8-3

Text of Nalini Chaturvedi 2014-8-3