Let’s Talk Parent & Teen Communication

Enduring Understandings• Communication is critical during

the teen years• Learning how to communicate

clearly and effectively is an ongoing process

• Parents’ ability to listen to their teen effects their ability to impact and influence their teen

Essential Questions• Why is communication critical

during the teen years?• What are strategies for

communicating clearly and effectively?

• Why is listening such an important part of communication?

Why communication is critical?• Spending more time away from

parents• Gaining independence• Expected to take responsibility for

actions• Needing guidance for healthy decision-

making and character development

Parent Communication Styles• Non-Assertive – Avoiding what you

think, feel, want, or believe because….• You are afraid to risk the

consequences• You don’t believe in your own rights• You don’t know how to speak up for

yourself• You think another person’s rights

are more important than yours

Parent Communication Styles• Aggressive – Saying what you think,

feel, want, or believe in ways that deny another person’s right to be treated with respect....• Anger• Meanness• Hurtful• Put-Downs• Spiteful

Parent Communication Styles• Assertive – Saying what you think, feel,

want, or believe….• In ways that don’t damage another

person’s right to be treated with respect

• In straightforward, nonthreatening ways

• In ways that don’t deny your own rights

Learning Activity

Table Talk• What are the most important aspects of

communication with your teen? • How does being aggressive in your communication

with your teen work against you? • How does being non-assertive in your

communication with your teen work against you? • How does using assertive communication with your

teen help you to get your point across? • Without making your teen feel defensive?• Without making your teen unsure of what you

really want?

Active Listening• Listen when your teen wants to talk• Listen without distractions• Listen without interrupting• Listen without judgment• Listen with your eyes, ears, & heart• Listen with empathy and share what you

believe you heard your teen say• Listen without needing to provide a

solutionListening actively will lead to your teen listening to you

Listen & Use the 5 A’s….• Affirmation• Acceptance• Appreciation• Availability• Accountability

Table Talk

Bibliography & Resources• http://childdevelopmentinfo.com/parentin

g/communication.shtml• http://www.powershow.com/view/34d08-

N2M1Y/Communicating_with_your_teenager_powerpoint_ppt_presentation

• http://www.betterhealth.vic.gov.au/bhcv2/bhcarticles.nsf/pages/Parenting_communicating_with_teenagers

• http://www.aces.edu/pubs/docs/H/HE-0780/

Bibliography & Resources• http://www.aces.edu/teens/stayconnected

/insession.php• http://www.aces.edu/pubs/docs/H/HE-07

80/• Words Kids Need to Hear by David Staal• How to Talk So Kids Will Listen & Listen So

Kids Will Talk by Adele Faber and Elaine Mazlish

• Bringing Up Kids Without Tearing Them Down by Dr. Kevin Leman