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Saputra 1 Sofyan Saputra Dr. Erin Dietel-McLaughlin WR 13200 7 October 2011 Making a Positive Impact on the Community through Rhetoric My portfolio demonstrates the tremendous growth I have experienced in Dr. E’s Community Writing class. In this class, I have learnt how to integrate technology and writing through the blog, utilize the elements of rhetoric, research effectively, and most importantly positively impact my community using my writing ability. This learning occurred over the course of four major projects: the narrative essay, the analytical essay, the research essay, and the visual essay. Each essay is highlighted in this portfolio and discussed in the reflection. Before discussing my essays, it is important to discuss the point at which I began refining my approach towards writing. Prior to participating in Dr. E’s Community writing class, I was relatively clueless about the writing process. I used to be very hesitant in my writing, constantly waiting for brilliant ideas rather than effectively searching for them and attempting to write the final draft on the first attempt. However, Lamott’s piece about “Shitty First Drafts” proved extremely useful in developing my approach to the writing process, especially with regards to the planning and “down draft”. My visual essay is a testament of the evolution of my approach towards writing. Rather than immediately delving into the film and attempting to create a final product on the first attempt, I planned my essay through an exploratory draft, a proposal, and a storyboard. These planning procedures not only saved time in the long run, but helped me remain on topic, which ultimately made every point in my essay support the thesis, which creates a sense unity and coherence that no doubt enhances my chances of influencing my audience. Moreover, I

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Saputra 1

Sofyan Saputra

Dr. Erin Dietel-McLaughlin

WR 13200 

7 October 2011 

Making a Positive Impact on the Community through Rhetoric

My portfolio demonstrates the tremendous growth I have experienced in Dr. E’s

Community Writing class. In this class, I have learnt how to integrate technology and writing

through the blog, utilize the elements of rhetoric, research effectively, and most importantly

positively impact my community using my writing ability. This learning occurred over the

course of four major projects: the narrative essay, the analytical essay, the research essay, and the

visual essay. Each essay is highlighted in this portfolio and discussed in the reflection.

Before discussing my essays, it is important to discuss the point at which I began refining

my approach towards writing. Prior to participating in Dr. E’s Community writing class, I was

relatively clueless about the writing process. I used to be very hesitant in my writing, constantly

waiting for brilliant ideas rather than effectively searching for them and attempting to write the

final draft on the first attempt. However, Lamott’s piece about “Shitty First Drafts” proved

extremely useful in developing my approach to the writing process, especially with regards to the

planning and “down draft”. My visual essay is a testament of the evolution of my approach

towards writing. Rather than immediately delving into the film and attempting to create a final

product on the first attempt, I planned my essay through an exploratory draft, a proposal, and a

storyboard. These planning procedures not only saved time in the long run, but helped me remain

on topic, which ultimately made every point in my essay support the thesis, which creates a sense

unity and coherence that no doubt enhances my chances of influencing my audience. Moreover, I

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have adopted the technique of using “down drafts”. Attempting to create a perfect piece on the

first attempt is not only a waste of time, but inhibits my ability to explore the topic as I am

writing since I will be excessively focused on later aspects of the paper, such as syntax and

grammar. In this portfolio, you will see that my pieces are centralized due to my use of 

planning — every single sentence strengthens the thesis and thus helps in persuading my

audience — and packed with unique insights due to my exploration of the topic during the down

draft.

Another important aspect of the writing process I discovered during the course of this

class was effective peer-workshops. During high-school peer-workshops were often ineffective

since most would complement one another without any major criticisms of one another’s pieces.

However, due to the advice provided in the text “The Peer Workshop: Sharing Drafts With

Others” and advice during our lecture on peer reviews, I have had very positive peer-workshop

experiences. For example, during the narrative essay, I received excellent and specific feedback 

about my need for more context in my flashbacks. What really pleased me was that unlike prior

workshops I have experienced, my peers not only gave general advice, but was specific by

providing ways I could improve context in my flashbacks, such as subtly implying activities. All

of the pieces you experience in my portfolio have been the result of extensive editing aided by

my peers.

Herrick defines rhetoric as a piece of writing that is planned, adapted to the audience,

shaped by human motives, responsive to a situation, persuasion-seeking, and relevant to

contingent issues. Although of my pieces demonstrate the six elements of rhetoric, the principles

of rhetoric are especially evident in my research paper regarding the root causes of and solutions

to combat terrorist recruitment. In this paper, I planned using the exploratory draft and proposal.

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These planning documents proved their importance more and more as my essay increased in

length. They prevented me from straying away from the thesis and ensured that all of my

statements supported the overarching argument. In order to address the audience — government

officials and other authority figures with influence in terrorist policies — my research essay

remained formal and drew information from scholarly sources. Moreover, the paper was built

upon my motives to ensure America, my country, is safe from terrorists and to aid the Middle

Easterners who are suffering daily under the hands of violent terrorists. The reason I was able to

effectively write this research paper is due to my viewing of the world news. As a result, my

research paper is a response to the images and arguments about terrorism I have seen in the

media. Since America is currently embroiled in a trillion dollar war against terrorism, suggesting

solutions for effectively mitigating terrorists is an important issue that is contingent to other

issues, such as the world economy, psychological disorders, deaths, and so on. Due to the large

amount of issues at stake, there was no doubt my research essay had to be persuasive to ensure

that policymakers seriously consider my solutions. To guarantee my visual essay remained

persuasive, I discussed counterarguments and complications, and then attempted to refute them.

For example, when discussing the problem of terrorist organizations utilizing the internet for

recruiting members overseas and within the United States, I discussed the counter-argumentative

fact that only a very small percentage actually fall prey to these websites. In order to refute this I

cited that terrorist operations do not require large numbers of people, only a dedicated and

disillusioned few.

The articles, chapters, and pieces read in this class greatly developed my skills as a writer

and reader. My critical research, reading, and thinking skills are most exemplified in my analysis

paper. The analysis paper I wrote addressed the violence in The Great Gatsby and how that

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violence revealed the dark, unpleasant side of the 1920s. For this paper I had to once again

peruse this complex text by F. Scott Fitzgerald and analytically interpret the few scenes of 

violence as well as identify implied or non-physical violence, which was an arduous task.

Considering that the text is significantly more difficult to analyze than a standard, blatantly

violent children’s film, tremendous critical reading skills were required and numerous challenges

arose. The main issue was finding the most important violent scenes and then inferring the

reasons for which Fitzgerald placed those scenes. A tremendous amount of research was

necessary for me to find effective and defendable inferences. A nearly hundred-year gap

separates me and the 1920s. For me to comprehend the context of the 1920s and make

reasonable conclusions about the time period Fitzgerald lived in, I had to read numerous articles

about the time period. Additionally, scholarly, psychological articles were also necessary for me

to read. Although a recommended selection was provided for me, these texts were complex and

required excellent thinking and analytical skills in order to make connections with The Great

Gatsby. For example, it required extensive research of theories regarding women and

aggressiveness and critical reading of the text in order to effectively analyze and discuss the fact

that despite the illusion of free women in the 1920s due to the flapper culture, women were still

overwhelmingly oppressed during the 1920s.

The research and critical reading skills I have learnt this semester have not only helped

me to develop the ability to skillfully incorporate source material into my writing projects, but

also to develop by ability to persuade. Persuasion requires evidence and coherent explanations

and arguments. Credible evidence derives from effective research techniques, which involves

finding scholarly sources and properly introducing them in the paper, while coherent

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course without demanding too much experience. The purpose was to encourage students to start

thinking about the topics of violence and quality rhetoric while keeping us in familiar territory by

making the prompt about our life experiences, a topic that we have very strong knowledge about.

After the narrative essay, I attained a better understanding of the topic of conflict resolution and

improved my critical reading skills due to the narratives we read in class. This essay also

changed my outlook about peer workshops towards the positive since they proved extremely

useful in this project. The next essay not only further explored violence, but also incorporated

research and critical reading requirements. Although the research component had not fully

developed as we were provided the sources to use, we were introduced to the MLA format and

could establish a basis of research experience by selecting outside sources for our analytical

essay. The analytical essay served to help us realize the prevalence of violence in the media,

improve our critical reading skills, and setup for the research component of the research essay.

By the completion of the analytical essay, I knew I could analyze complex texts and relate them

to various theories significantly better. The research essay can be considered the major project of 

the semester. This essay served as the learning curve of the semester. Both the narrative and

analytical essay as well as the Take Ten visits built up towards the research essay by getting us

acquainted with the topics of conflict resolution, rhetoric, and critical reading and preparing us

for extensive researching. The research essay was extremely difficult because we had to find our

own scholarly sources, integrate these sources effectively, and utilize elements of rhetoric to

extensively argue about a pertinent conflict-related issue. By the end of the research, I had

become a significantly better researcher and persuasive writers, and could, if necessary, write

strong persuasive pieces on a public forum, letter to the editor, book, and so on. The culmination

of our projects was the visual essay. The purpose of the visual essay was to demonstrate to the

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students how much they have grown and developed in their knowledge of rhetoric and research.

It also served as the culmination of our community-service and activism-based work since our

research essays was focused on persuading the world to become aware and/or exert effort to

combat various community-based issues. This essay no doubt demonstrated the significant

progress I have made compared to my initial essays. By this time, I had a strong grasp of 

rhetoric, research, and activism; as a result I was able to create a comprehensive film that could

hopefully persuade Notre Dame Students to avoid wasting food.

Because the visual essay truly showed the significant growth I had experienced during

the course of the semester, I am most proud of this essay. My visual essay exemplifies the

elements of rhetoric, includes a significant amount of research, and persuasively argues against

food waste, a topic I am passionate about. One of the most important lessons I have learnt in this

class is to make a positive difference in the community. My visual essay intends to do just that,

so as a result I am extremely proud of it. My parents have always taught me to never waste food,

and I hope other students can live with this same moral standard. This essay was truly the

culmination of the semester. In it, I combined the narrative and story-telling techniques I utilized

in the narrative essay through the live recorded scenes; research was necessary for finding

credible facts to prove the trend of food waste among ND students and support my reasons for

why food should not be wasted; and elements of rhetoric were effectively incorporated in order

to maintain and persuade the audience.

The fact that I was able to create an argumentative piece that could positively impact my

community shows the tremendous amount of growth I have experienced throughout this course.

At the beginning of the course I was ingrained in the standard five-paragraph format and had

rarely thought about using my writing skills to positively impact the community. However, as a

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result of the close connection between quality writing and community service that this class’

projects entailed, I am now confident enough to place my work  in the public’s eye, where it can

hopefully make a positive impact.

This is Sofyan Saputra’s community writing portfolio.