VISIONSVISIONSVISIONSVISIONS

WHITNEY

HOUSTON A Journey Home

Tony D’Urso

Builds a

New Life

CHRISTIAN MAGAZINE May 2012

Wess Morgan

Celebrating

His first Stellar Award

OPRAH

WINFREY

Interviews

Whitney Houston’s

Daughter

Bobbi Kristina

GOSPEL ENTERTAINMENT EDITION

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TABLE OF CONTENTS

TABLE OF CONTENTS

It’s Your Time God has made everything beautiful in it’s time. He has also set eternity in the hearts of men, yet they can-not fathom what God has done from beginning to end (Ecclesiastes 3:11) God’s timing is not like yours. Before he formed you in your mothers womb, and even before you were conceived he knew you.

(Jeremiah 1:5) We serve a mighty God!

Obviously God thinks that you are valuable. Have you ever taken time to look at the palm of your hands? God designed every fiber, line and measurement of your body. Have you noticed that God does things in pairs or two’s? There’s a planned pattern that God follows for every thing and human being he creates.

What is man that thou art mindful of him? (Psalm 8:4)

Those who are Architects and Engineers have developed their trade and skills, but the passion to build and design all comes from the Lord God Almighty. There are those who are ap-pointed by God to do specific work. For example, Noah, who was a builder. Noah’s wife asked him a question, “Husband, why do you build an ark on dry land?” “When I am done, God will send the rain in his time,” replied Noah. And there was Saul, who persecuted Christians, but in God’s time, he changed Sauls name to Paul, and ordained him to be Apostle Paul, a committed Christian leader. God made Jeremiah, a prophet to the nations. What is your call or assignment in this earth?

Whatever God has given you to do, do it to the glory of God!

Are you feeling discouraged, frustrated, fear of learning, lack of confidence or apprehensive? Well, Jeremiah thought he was too young and inexperienced to be God’s spokesman to the nations. But God promised to be with him. Remember, God has placed inside of you every gift and talent, he is the de-signer of your soul. Your body was designed by God from the dust of the ground. You are appointed by God to do great things in the earth. And God said that he would never leave you nor forsake you. Whatever God gives you to do, obey his calling, he will provide the necessary resources, tools and pro-

vision to do it.

God can see into your future. He can see the trouble, trials and tribulation coming. Therefore, he warns us of storms ahead. God tells us that we will have trouble in life, but he will also rescue us from the storm. God did not promise that the storm would not come. But God promised that he

will walk with you through the storm.

As God instructed Jeremiah, he will also instruct you. Is God speaking to your heart? In God’s timing, he

instructed Jeremiah that it was time to speak to the nations.

Is God telling you, “It’s Your Time?”

BY AUTHOR LINDA TARDY

ORDER AT WWW.AMAZON,.COM

Tony D'Urso builds a new life for others by Karen Rubin

T here is a slum outside of Nairobi, Kenya, where the "road" is called "River of Shit" because that is where the people's waste flows. It is a slum so poor and desperate, that unwanted children are left beside a river bank during the monsoon, to be swept to their death. And for too many of the 1.5 million people

crammed into this slum, it is the only way they will ever leave.

This is where Anthony D'Urso comes twice a year from his home in Long Island to build a school, an orphanage, to hammer and saw and

haul.

Since retiring after 14 years as the elected North Hempstead Town Councilman and 30 years with the City of New York's Department of Housing Development Administration, he has devoted himself to three different charities, traveling thousands of miles each year at his own expense, to Haiti, Nicaragua and Kenya, building homes one at a time, and schools one

classroom at a time.

He works in some of the poorest neighborhoods on the planet: in Haiti, where the "improvement" is creating a tent city for children orphaned by the earthquake; in villages in Nicaragua where people live in leaky shacks of scraps of sheet metal and discarded lumber and even the homes of cinderblock that he builds do not have running water or electricity; and in Kibera outside of Nairobi, where the life expectancy is among the lowest on earth and half of the deaths are from AIDS, leaving scores of orphans,

many of whom are born with HIV.

With each stroke of the hammer, cut of a saw and haul of a cinder block, he is opening a path and creating the

possibility of making a better life, instead of being trapped in the circumstance of their birth.

He is driven by this nagging question: "I can't understand why the children have to live this way. What did they

do to deserve to live in this structural poverty that no matter what they do, they won't get out?"

When he retired, he decided to do something about it.

"When I was retiring, I was thinking about what to do for the rest of my healthy life.

"I never had a lot of money. I don’t know what it is to have money. I wanted to do something I always wanted to do and had always done, but in small way – I was involved with Habitat for Humanity, helping build a few houses, made regular contributions to Save the Children, Boys Towns, Smile Train. But now, I wanted to give

more of myself."

Now, he travels twice year to Masaya, Nicaragua with Bridges to Community, personally sponsoring the building of two houses a year. These are simple cement block houses, all of them conforming to a similar style to withstand earthquakes, but are a big improvement over what the people live in now: ramshackle shacks of

scrap metal and lumber that flood when it rains, with no electricity or running water, cooking outside, a latrine.

He was going back and forth to Nicaragua - he completed his 11th trip this past November - when he learned

about the program to help the people in Kibera, a slum outside Nairobi, Kenya.

Some 1.5 million destitute people are crammed into an area the size of Central Park, paying rent to a landlord for the privilege of living in a dilapidated shack without water or electricity, where people throw their waste

into the street so a river of waste flows down the middle of the dirt road.

"The outside doesn’t know what happens inside the slums and inside, they don’t know what happens outside the

slums."

Now he makes two trips a year - on January 1 and July 4 - spending two weeks at a time (and three days traveling). He travels with a group of about eight people, and always comes with presents for the children. On

our visit to his home in Port Washington, he was preparing to travel again.

Whereas the project in Nicaragua is more about families, the work in Kenya is more about rescuing children -

literally.

"Kibera has one of the lowest life expectancies in Africa (49), the mortality rate due to AIDS is 50%. A lot of

the kids being rescued are orphaned because their parents died from AIDS. Many are born HIV positive.

Children are abandoned and left to die. "There is a little river not far from the slum and most of the year it is dry, but when the monsoon comes, it swells up and sweeps away everything. Children are placed there so they

will be swept away."

A local woman who is a product of the slums, has dedicated her life to creating a school there for first to sixth grade. Her mission was expanded after she picked up two children - one was eight months, the other about 18 months - who were left at the river to die and the government refused to help unless she adopted them. And so

she has adopted them and many others, since.

Cross Cultural Thresholds, the group Tony works with, has supported her mission, physically building an orphanage which includes a school, and sustaining it by raising the funds to pay the teacher's salary ($2700 a

year) and the cost of a nutrition program which provides the children with three meals a day.

D'Urso's group is building a nursery school now. But the group has a more ambitious plan for a third school, Face and a Future, a high school that will be built outside the slum itself, to open these young people to what

might be possible.

"We want to bring them outside the slums. If we get a child at age 2 for nursery up to six, then to elementary school, then for four years in high school, now we have structured a person with education and a different view from a person who grows up in the slum and never gets that outside view. This will give them a profession, so

they can go outside the slum and market themselves."

D'Urso's work in Haiti is connected to a faith-based organization, Croatian Relief Services, which initially was involved in Croatian relief during Bosnia-Kosovo conflict, but once that area stabilized, turned its attention to

helping Haitians in the aftermath of the January 2010 earthquake.

Much of his work in Haiti involves creating an orphanage for children who lost their family in the earthquake. They funded a lunch program and medical assistance. The orphanage now consists of tents; their plan is to build

a school on two acres, using the rubble from the earthquake to elevate the structure against future flooding.

Escaping the Bonds of Birth

The common thread among the three different charitable enterprises is providing that something that breaks the

bonds of poverty and despair.

Tony D'Urso knows what it is to feel trapped by your condition, in a culture that accepts that you are what you

are, and what it means to escape to a place where there is opportunity to fulfill your potential.

He grew up in Formia, a small town in Latina area of Italy, between Rome and Naples, where his lot in life was

to be a laborer, and where the idea of pursuing education beyond fifth grade was out of reach.

He spent his teen years as a laborer on construction sites and apprenticed as a mason.

"They would put stones heavier than my body weight on my shoulder, and I would get on a ladder and carry the

stone up the scaffold. I cursed every day. I worked hard because I had to.. I knew I had to get out of Italy."

The United States allowed Italy had a scant few thousands visas, but France had 10 times that amount and most weren't used. Tony's parents, as it happened, were both born in France Their fortuitous birth provided Tony with an out. But in order to take advantage of the visas, he had to emigrate before his 21st birthday. Just a couple of months shy of turning 21, and with his father's blessing, he arrived in Long Island City on March 24, 1960 with two bags. He landed on the doorstep of an acquaintance who used to be a custodian in Italy, who had come three years earlier, with whom he corresponded. He had hoped to share the furnished apartment, paying $7 a

week rent. He had $14 in his pocket at the time and spoke no English.

D'Urso got a job doing construction, and enrolled in "English for Immigrants," studying for two years, then

attended night school at Brooklyn Tech, finally earning his high school diploma after six years, in 1971.

He was earning $44 a week, often working at two jobs dishwashing, furniture making and construction, and sending back half to his family in Italy. Then he got double pneumonia, and when he could not pay the hospital bill, was threatened with deportation. A doctor at St John's Hospital worked out an arrangement where he could repay the bill at $20 a week, and for the next three years, he made regular trips to drop off the money, even after

the hospital relocated.

Armed with his high school diploma, he landed a civil service position with the City of New York's Department

of Housing Development Administration, in 1971.

He pursued higher education at the New York Technical College, graduating in 1975 with an AAS degree, then earned a Bachelor of Science from Pratt Institute School of Architecture in 1979. He did not stop there, but

went on to earn a Master of Science at Pratt Institute in 1983.

After 17 years of night school, of a routine of getting up for work at 5 am, leaving work and going to school until 10:40 pm, and finally coming home at 11:30 pm only to repeat the whole process again the next day, he was finally done. The whirlwind of work and study probably obscured the fact that he had surpassed what he

could only dream of as a boy.

Tony advanced through the ranks in the City department. He was promoted from senior building construction estimator to general supervisor of building construction, to director of operations for the Division of Design and

Construction.

In 1995 he was promoted to assistant commissioner of the Office of Architecture Engineering and Construction, putting him in charge of a technical staff of 300 and an annual capital budget of $500 million. When he retired

after 30-years as a housing official, he was Deputy Commissioner.

Even as a boy in Italy, D'Urso had a penchant for politics, and his life here afforded him the opportunity to pursue that interest, as well. He served as committeeman, zone leader, and in 1991 he was elected North

Hempstead Town Councilman, serving 14 years.

At this point, fully retired, he could have simply enjoyed the good life. Instead, Tony sold off the property he inherited from his father in Italy and other property, sold his house and scaled down, and has been using his

cash to focus and expand on his charitable work. Last year, he spent $14,000 on travel, alone.

It is the way he has lived his life.

"I would tells my children when they were growing up that a certain amount of money has to be given to charity. I used to take them Sunday mornings to St. Francis Hospital with a Sons of Italy program – to visit needy children who were there for open heart surgery. Out of 32 children we sponsored, we only lost one. I would tell my children, 'How lucky you are.' We would bring cold cuts and bread to the parents – and we

worked out a deal with a motel to house them while their children were in the hospital.

This was the way he was raised, as well. His father may not have appreciated the value of education to uplift his

son, but he modeled heroism in the cause of righteousness.

He says, "I have three birthdays in my life, August 3 1939, when I was born; March 24, 1960 when I arrived in

the United States, and September 8, 1943.

"I don’t remember anything before September 8, 1943," he says. "Americans came with airplanes, flares, turning the night bright like a sunny day at night. They dropped leaflets telling us to get out, they would bomb the city. Our family left and went over the mountain. We stayed 10-11 months. During that time, my father was busy. He had worked for a Jewish family – Ascarelli – whose main residence was Naples. They were in the textile industry and owned farms in a beach resort. My father worked there. Nazis were looking for Jews to take back to slave labor camps. My father hid them in the mountains – they would hide during the day and move at

night, always moving, because someone would have sold them out."

For eight months, his father was away from their family, trying to protect the Ascarellis. "Then, one day, Moroccans who were fighting for the Germans, caught up with them. My father used his French to convince

them they were French."

Remembering the Past to Build the Future

D'Urso says that remembering his background, where he came from, has shaped what he does now. But others

have taken a different view.

"There are people who came poor like me to the United States but became super conservatives - as if they built a castle with a moat and lifted the drawbridge. They don't like illegal immigrants. But I know that if I didn't find

a way to come here legally, I would have come illegally."

Similarly, his up-from-his-own-bootstraps success has caused him to devote himself to charitable giving, rather

than stand aside and let those in need make it on their own, if they have the ability and the luck.

The desire to help others, he says, "was always there, the fire under the ashes… When I retired, I wanted to do more. I feel good about it… I never had much money, but I know that when you die, the suit you are buried in has no pockets, because you can’t take it with you. People get too involved with materialistic society. If I had a

Lexus instead of a Camry, I couldn’t do this."

His wife, Maria, sacrifices, too - not just the material things, but also the weeks away that Tony spends

traveling. It is her gift to him that she supports him knowing how important it is to him.

"I want my epitaph to say 'He tried to make a more just world.'" Tony says. "In a small way, I’m contributing to that, like a pebble on the beach… There are some kids that directly or indirectly will have a better future, a better life, maybe if I help change their expectations of life. I had no expectations growing up. You think 'toys

for Christmas/. What toys? We had no expectation whatsoever."

In many ways, Tony D'Urso has come full circle - the young boy who wanted to escape his lot as a construction laborer, is laboring to construct houses, schools, and paths to a new life for other children who have done nothing to deserve the miserable lot in life they were born to, and who, without people like Tony, would have

no way of breaking the cycle of structural poverty.

For more information about contributing to these charitable causes, email durso1939@yahoo.com.

________________________________

© 2011 News & Photo Features Syndicate, a division of Workstyles, Inc. All rights reserved. For editorial

feature and photo information, go to www.news-photos-features.com or email krubin723@aol.com.

T ]ÉâÜÇxç [ÉÅx

by Sharlyn Guthrie

F ame

Like a multi-faceted prism, Whitney Eliza-beth Houston took her place in the window of the world soon after graduating from high school. In her debut television per-formance of “Home” she sparkled; she shone. The many and varied facets of Whitney Houston’s life have been widely hailed and highly scrutinized. It is not my intent to write yet another biography, to idolize her, or to expose her shortcomings. Instead, I hope to more intimately acquaint you with the Light that glistened through Whitney’s life and music, the Light that

shines eternal.

“When I think of home I think of a place where there’s love overflowing; I wish I was home, I wish I was back there…” she sang on the Merv Griffin Show that evening in 1985. Whitney’s first publicized song

and many of its lyrics are especially poignant now, just days after her death.

“You won’t forget that name –Whitney Houston,” Merv Griffin quipped as the crowd’s emphatic applause

subsided following her performance; and now, more than two decades later, his prediction stands true.

That same year Arista Records released her first album entitled simply Whitney Houston. That album soared to the top of the charts, where it remained for 14 consecutive weeks. It was also the first album by a female artist to net three number one single hits. A year later Whitney Houston was named the number one

artist of the year, and the album Whitney Houston became the number one album of the year. Her name and

her fame continued to spread across the country and the continents.

Whitney’s extraordinary beauty was noticed even before her musical debut. A striking cover girl for Seven-teen, she also appeared in Glamour and Cosmopolitan. Naturally lean and tall (5’8”), she was an enchanting

blend of African American, Scottish, Dutch, and Native American ethnicity.

Her musical success continued to swell, even as her acting career was launched in 1992 with the release of The Bodyguard. Throughout the 90’s several more movies followed, and Whitney’s fame and world-wide acclaim

mounted.

Whitney’s awards and achievements were numerous: 22 American Music Awards, 30 Billboard Music Awards, 2 Emmys, 6 Grammys, 16 NAACP Image Awards, 6 People’s Choice Awards, and 99 RIIA Awards. In all, she was nominated for 562 awards, of which she won 415. Her successes are impressive by any stan-

dards.

Following one of her earliest appearances on the Oprah Show, Oprah fondly dubbed Whitney Houston “The Voice.” Whitney’s voice was indeed a unique gift, recognized early and carefully cultivated by her mother, Cissy Houston -herself an accomplished vocalist. More impressive than the quality of Whitney’s voice, how-ever, is what she emanated as she sang –the emotion she drew up from the depths of her listeners’ souls. That is what distinguished her from other artists. Simply scanning through the titles of her greatest hits stirs long-forgotten feelings and resurrects that incomparable voice. The light shone brightest when she sang. But as other less stellar aspects of Whitney’s life became known, her physical appearance, her performance, and even

her voice began to falter.

T ragic Turn

Bobby Brown was the love of Whitney’s life even though many felt his influence was the root of her troubles. On September 14, 2009, following the end of their tumultuous marriage, Whitney granted Oprah a highly per-sonal and widely publicized interview. It was then that she reflected on the gift that was her voice. “You were not like any of the others,” Oprah said. “You really were given the voice. You were given that treasure. And people felt, how could you not know that that was to be treasured?” Whitney replied, “I knew in the days when I was a teenager singing for God. I was so sure. When I became

"Whitney Houston" and all this other stuff happened, my life became the world's.”

Ironically, the window of the world that allowed us all to view and admire Whitney’s God-given treasure may have been the very thing that got in the way of the light. I can’t help but recall here the words Pastor Winans

delivered as part of his eulogy, “The things we have are God’s gift to us. The way we live is our gift to God.”

In spite of her incomparable voice and unsurpassed success, Whitney made some unfortunate choices and ventured into the dark realms of substance abuse. Although some might be tempted to point Rev. Winan’s words backward at Whitney’s life struggles, they were in reality intended as cautionary words for us. Our lives may never become as public as Whitney’s, but we are all called to live transparent before the world, al-lowing the light of God’s love to reflect His beauty. “Let your light shine before men in such a way that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father who is in heaven.” (Matthew 5:16 ASV) For Whitney, as

for all of us, the light continued to shine; she just stepped out into the darkness.

L ove For Jesus

While it now seems ironic that Whitney’s first widely publicized performance was “Home,” it seems totally

appropriate that her last public performance was “Jesus Loves Me,” an oft’ repeated theme throughout her life.

Oprah asked Whitney in 2009, “Who do you love?”

Without hesitation Whitney replied, “I love the Lord. I do. I'm so humbled and so thankful by his grace, his goodness, and for never giving up on me. I love my mother, my daughter, my relatives, my sisters, my broth-

ers. I love you. Because I knew somewhere in the background you were there praying, too.”

Actor and director Tyler Perry, who was also Whitney’s close friend and confidant spoke these words at her homegoing, “There are two constants that I know about Whitney Houston: There was a grace that carried her from heaven down through Miss Cissy Houston, a grace that brought her up through singing. There was a grace that kept on carrying her all the way through. The other thing I know for sure, and this is more impor-tant than anything that she’s ever done in her life -Whitney

Houston loved the Lord.”

Tyler referenced Romans 8:38-39, “For I am persuaded, that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor things present, nor things to come, nor powers, nor height, nor depth, nor any other creature, shall be able to separate us from the love

of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord.”

He also revealed that on several occasions as Whitney was sharing with him some of her difficulties -some things with which she was struggling at the time, he would be ready to step in to encourage her, and before he could speak a word she would say, “…but my Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ, and his

amazing grace…”

“I know she loved the Lord,” Tyler went on to say, “and if it was grace that carried her all the way through, it was that same

grace that carried her home.”

Clearly, Whitney Houston’s love for Jesus is what grounded

her, both in her best and worst of times.

Ch ild-like Faith

Jesus said, during his ministry on this earth, “…unless you change and become like little children, you will

Ch ild-like Faith

Jesus said, during his ministry on this earth, “…unless you change and become like little children, you will

never enter the kingdom of heaven.” (Matthew 18:3)

Whitney exhibited a simple, childlike faith throughout her lifetime. She never doubted the love her parents showered upon her. Her childhood roots –her family, church, and community –grounded her. When life be-

came messy or complicated Whitney could always go home. Home was a place of peace, love and acceptance.

Whitney held onto the basic premise that God loved her, no matter what. It is no coincidence that the lyrics of the simplest of children’s songs, “Jesus Loves Me, this I know,” are the words that brought her joy and com-fort, even in the hours before her death. Those words, more than any others, took her back to the basic sim-

plicity of childhood and the blessed assurance of God’s unconditional love.

H umility

Humility is not typically associated with superstardom. Yet these were the private questions Whitney often entertained in her own mind, throughout and despite her outstanding success: Was I good enough? Could I have been better? Do they like me? Some have labeled these questions doubts and insecurities, but they may

more aptly be viewed as humility –an out dated virtue in the eyes of the world, and a constant theme throughout Scripture. Humil-ity is achieved when I see God for who He is beholding me as I am. In a very real sense the love of Jesus is meaningless unless cou-pled with the truth of our unloveliness. “But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us.” The words found in Romans 5:8 give us good reason to be humble, offering a balanced view of our unworthiness in light of

God’s love.

There is much evidence of Whitney’s hum-ble spirit, despite her tremendous fame and fortune. Diane Forden, fashion editor of Sev-enteen, who worked with Whitney during her modeling career, had this to say about her, “She was very dedicated and very diligent…she was a kind person too. Very loving and

very considerate of other people. She was never, ever a diva.” From the world’s perspective she had every

right to be a diva, and yet she maintained a level of humility throughout her life and career.

Record mogul Clive Davis, who shaped and guided Houston’s career, spoke of her humility at her recent homegoing service adding, "Purely and simply, she was one of a kind. Yes, she admitted to the crazies and to

Oprah her searing battles, but when I needed her, she was there for me. She was an eternally loyal friend."

"As popular and powerful as she was, she was so brilliantly liberal in her generosity with others," said Kim Burrell, a Gospel singer who enjoyed a longtime friendship with Whitney, and one who also spoke at Whit-

ney’s service.

W eakness Sometimes the line between humility and self-doubt is vague and perplexing, but

part of humility is recognizing and coming to grips with one’s weakness. “Therefore I am well content with weaknesses, with insults, with distresses, with persecutions, with difficulties, for Christ's sake; for when I am weak, then I am strong.” These are Paul’s words in II Corinthians 12:10. It may be presumptuous to claim that all of our weaknesses are “for Christ’s sake” in the same sense that Paul experienced them. Still, in this

verse lies a universal principle of strength being realized through recognizing and embracing our weaknesses.

Whitney’s weaknesses were thinly veiled, especially in the years following her marriage to Bobby Brown. While many are quick to point accusing fingers at Bobby or at the drugs both admittedly abused, Whitney put

the blame squarely on her own self, claiming it was she who lacked strength.

In Diane Sawyer’s 2002 interview of Whitney she asked “If you had to name the devil for you, the biggest

devil among them?”

“That would be me. It's my decid-ing; it's my heart; it's what I want, and what I don't want.” Whitney continued, “Nobody makes me do anything I don't want to do. It's my decision. So the biggest devil is me. I'm either my best friend or my worst enemy. And that's how I have to deal with it. I pray every day that I am strong. I'm not the strongest every day, but I'm not the weakest, either. And I won't break.

And I won't break.”

Seven years later in her 2009 Oprah asked, “Do you now know your own strength?” “I know from whence my help cometh. I do know that. And I know that it's strong within me. If ever I get low, I get weak, I know where I can turn to. I love the spirit of God so much that I'm not willing to trade that for anything. I'm not trading that for nothing. For nothing. Because I feel joy that I can't even speak about. And peace that passes all understand-ing.”

Oprah Winfrey Interviews Whitney Elizabeth Houston

“Because I know you can't get through this without God.” “I was by myself so much during those years in L.A., and I would just sit and I would read the Word and I would stop and I would think, ‘What do you want me to know?’ The Holy Spirit would speak to me and guide me. And I wouldn't know how I would get to this place or that place, or how I did this or how I was to go into

the studio and sing again. But I did it.”

Concerning her life, as her marriage to Bobby was disintegrating, Whitney told Oprah, “…I remember saying to God one day, I said, ‘Give me one day of strength.’ Because I was weak. I was so weak to [Bobby]. I was so weak to the love. I was, like: ‘This is love? What is this? What am I into?’” “Were you weak to him or were you weak to the drugs?” Oprah asked, “Because the world's perception is you were weak to the drugs.”

“He was my drug. I didn't do anything without him. I wasn't getting high by myself. It was me and him to-gether. You know, we were partners. And that's what my high was. Him. He and I being together. And what-ever we did, we did together. No matter what, we did it together.” “Because you were his wife.” “Yes. And he was my husband. And I'm gonna make this happen and we're gonna make this work. And that's

the way it was.”

The song “I Look To You,” which was written by R. Kelly for Whitney’s 2009 album of the same title, was recognized by those close to her as Whitney’s heartfelt cry in the midst of her struggles. In the video version Whitney pointed skyward and was quoted as saying that the “You” represented the object and source of her

faith. This heart-rending song was also sung by R. Kelly during Whitney’s Homegoing.

G race

Just as Whitney wondered at times whether her musical and acting performances were good enough, many have wondered in the days since her death if she was good enough to make it into Heaven. I didn’t have to know Whitney personally to tell you with certainty that she wasn’t good enough. The Bible makes no excep-

tions when it tells us that “…all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God,” (Romans 3:23)

Despite the spiritual side of Whitney Houston that I have tried to expose, despite all the mentions of angels and heaven so eloquently voiced at Whitney Houston’s service, we are well aware of her shortcomings. Drugs, domestic violence, excessive living, abusing the gift of her voice, wasting her fortune…Whitney’s sins are well documented. So all the talk about Whitney loving the Lord, and Jesus loving Whitney –what is it really

worth at the end of the day?

I am reminded of the story of the prodigal son –the son who asked for his inheritance early and then foolishly squandered his father’s fortune. Having been a church-going Christian my entire life, I have always indenti-

fied with the other son –the hard-working one who stayed close to home seeing to his father’s business.

In fact, it was not long ago that I came to realize that the sins of the wayward son are not the story’s central

message. The central message is the Fa-ther’s grace -grace that was too extrava-gant in the eyes of the elder brother, who refused to join in celebrating his derelict brother’s return. In the end only one son was reconciled to his father, and it’s not the one I expected. The wayward son was humbled by grace. The older son

was angered by it.

Fortunately for Whitney Houston and for the rest of us as well, our fitness for Heaven doesn’t depend on real or per-ceived goodness on our part. “Not by works of righteousness which we have done, but according to His mercy He

saved us…” (Titus 3:5)

The elder brothers among us were cyni-cal when Tyler Perry and Rev. Winans spoke of God’s love for Whitney –of an-gels escorting her to her heavenly father. They assumed these preachers were try-ing, as preachers often do, to rewrite the

script that was her life, making a saint out of a sinner.

Like Whitney, the younger brothers among us recognize just how far they have fallen from God’s grace. In

their poverty they see their need.

It is indeed sad that Whitney died before she had the opportunity to get her life turned around. When Diane Sawyer asked her to describe her perfect future life Whitney’s response was, “Retired. Sitting, looking at my daughter grow up. Become a great woman of God. Grandchildren.” If only her dreams had become reality; if

only she had come back and finished strong, giving God the glory.

The good news is that in spite of everything God is still glorified. What made Whitney God’s child and brought her home to Him on February 11, 2012 was nothing short of grace extended to an errant child –a child

no different than most of us, except in the exposure of her sins and the extent to which she was scrutinized.

Make no mistake –God wants us to finish strong. That is why Rev. Winans encouraged us to prioritize, to seek the kingdom of God first, before anything else in our lives. In Romans 6 Paul asks, “What shall we say then, are we to continue in sin so that grace may increase? May it never be! How can we who died to sin still live in

it?”

Yet Paul discussed his own struggle with sin in the next chapter saying, “For the good that I want, I do not do,

but I practice the very evil that I do not want.”

“It is Ash Wednesday. And, as always, by the end of the day, that which I have set my face to do for

Lent, I will have already failed to do. And that which I swore I would not do, I have already done. The

cock will have crowed three times.

The main sacrifice of Lent, for me, has always been the loss of spiritual pride and self-respect. I am

incapable of keeping the promises I make to God. But my abject spiritual failure inevitably leads me to

a deeper understanding of my need for grace. Which God gives freely.” –Ferguson Glen, character in

J oy

“I know from whence my help cometh. I do know that. And I know that it's strong within me. If ever I

get low, I get weak, I know where I can turn to. I love the spirit of God so much that I'm not willing to

trade that for anything. I'm not trading that for nothing. For nothing. Because I feel joy that I can't

even speak about. And peace that passes all understanding.”

Thin Blue Smoke Macmillan New Writing, 2009.

T riumph

Many news reports and headlines referred to Whitney Houston’s death as “A Tragic

End.” But death was not the end for Whitney Houston.

On Saturday, February 18, 2012 Cissy Houston “brought the world to church” for her daughter’s homegoing.

On Saturday, February 18, 2012 Cissy Houston “brought the world to church” for her daughter’s homegoing.

Before a crowd of family and celebrities, with thousands of viewers around the world watching on television,

New Hope Baptist Church held a celebration. Instead of a dirge, white robed choir members joyfully clapped their hands and raised their voices singing, “And I shall dwell in the house of the Lord forever and ever...” The faces of those choir members lit up the sanctuary, and they sang like there was no greater truth in the world –because there isn’t. Death, sorrow, and sin lost the battle, and only the light of God’s love and grace shone through. It was a day of victory, a day of rejoicing both in Heaven and on earth. It was as if we finally caught a glimpse of the prism through the eyes of her creator, and it was more exquisite than anyone ever dreamed. The end was triumphant, not tragic. Whitney was finally home, and for her it was only the beginning.

W hitney Houston, farewell to a great legendary singer and women of God. The Bible say,

that if you call on the name of the Lord, you shall be saved (Romans 10:9-13) Whitney made it clear

that she loved the Lord, and went home to Glory!

WHITNEY

HOUSTON

FROM

TRAGEDY TO

TRIUMPH

Lyrics of “I Look to You”:

I Look To You by R. Kelly (As sung by Whitney Houston) As I lay me down Heaven hear me now I’m lost without a cause After giving it my all Winter storms have come And darkened my sun After all that I’ve been through Who on earth can I turn to? Chorus: I look to you, I look to you After all my strength is gone In you I can be strong I look to you, I look to you And when melodies are gone

In you I hear a song I look to you 'bout to lose my breath There's no more fighting left Sinking to rise no more Searching for that open door And every road that I've taken Led to my regret And I don't know if I'm gonna make it Nothing to do but lift my head Chorus: My levees are broken My walls are coming down on me My rain is falling, defeat is calling I need you to set me free Take me far away from the battle I need you

Shine on me!

Biblical references are from the New American

Standard Version

The Following could be included as insets or

sidebars near the appropriate mentions in the

article:

Lyrics of “Home By Charlie Smalls When I think of home I think of a place where there's love overflowing; I wish I was home, I wish I was back there, with the things I've been knowing. Wind that makes the tall trees bend into lean-ing, Suddenly the snowflakes that fall have a mean-ing. Sprinkling the scene, makes it all clean. Maybe there’s a chance for me to go back now that I have some direction; It sure would be nice to be back home, Where there's love and affection. And just maybe I can convince time to slow up. Giving me enough time in my life to grow up; Time, please be my friend, and let me start again ...Suddenly my world is gonna change its face but I still know where I'm going; I have had my mind spun around and around In space and yet I've watched it growing. Oh, I know you're listening Lord, so wont you please don't make it hard. I know I shouldn't believe everything, Everything, the things we see. Tell me, should I try and stay or maybe I should run away Would it be better, better just to let things be? Living here in this brand-new world might be a fantasy; yes it might be But it taught me to love, So I know that it's real, its real, real to me... And I've learned that we must look inside our hearts to find... Yeah we gotta find a world full of love like yours, like mine-Like Home

HITNEY HOUSTON

1963-

HITNEY HOUSTON

1963-2012

The Blind Escape

By Emmanuel Obu

T he captor sat opposite the hostage prodding him with threatening questions, right there in the middle of the fearful bush, and the mind of the hostage raced with many thoughts as he sat on the floor, littered with

dry leaves.

With his hands tied to his back and his face covered with a hood, he kept wondering if he will ever get out of

this hostage and locate the way out of the bush. Just how would I? He thought.

Then suddenly there were sounds and strange noises coming from somewhere within the bush. The captor in panic, stood up to go either in search of what that could be or in a bid to run away and escape from an un-

known attack or arrest.

The hostage in excitement and desperation suddenly shrugged up from the grassy floor littered with broken tree stems and dry leave petals. While in a haste to escape, he stumbled on shrubs around him and crashed into

towering trees he could not see, because he had a hood over his face.

He got up, still very desperate to escape but without knowing any direction or see at all, in the dense bushy mangrove – his face was still covered with the captors hood and his hands still tied behind him. He made des-

perate attempts, upon attempts to just keep moving but he will stumble and topple over severally.

In another thought he stopped, seeing he had dissipated so much energy without progress and time maybe run-ning out on him because he didn’t know if the captor was coming back to get him into hostage! His greatest

handicap now was the covering over his eyes – if only he could see a direction, then he will follow it.

He thought, putting his whole being to action, and said “I will be calm and not run crazily any more. I will en-gage my inner senses. I will move now with my imagination and deep perception of where I feel is the direc-tion and then just a little bit gently, so I don’t stumble and topple over. My legs will be my guide – I will

stretch them forward to feel what is ahead. I may be lucky to escape.”

Within all these, there was still a deep sense of anxiety, pressure and desperation to get out of the woods quickly. But he was bound to move very slowly, the most vital aid he needed to be fast were his eyes – they

were still covered.

After his resolve to use inner senses, imagination, perception and his leg to feel his way through, for obstacles, he made very little progress towards an unknown direction. He got tired of his effort and decided to sit at the

foot of a tree with very low thorny branches. Just then warm tears rolled down his cheeks behind the hood!

He remembered he had once heard a gospel sermon in one Sunday service he attended where the preacher re-peatedly spoke these words from the scripture “where there is no vision, the people perish…..”(Proverbs

covering his head to his neck got stuck, from the top of his head to the side, on a low thorny branch of the

tree he didn’t see.

Immediately he noticed his hood was stuck, he began to pull his head hard from the branch in attempt to yank off the hood. Just like a miracle the hood tore open from the head to his neck and fell apart and his visi-

bility came alive.

With this, he lifted up his eyes and saw a direction that spoke to his heart to follow. With his hands still bound behind him but vision clear, he started to run towards the direction he was inspired to follow (when

you see the vision, no matter the handicap, keep running towards it).

Within a couple of twenty minutes distance, he began to approach what seemed like a flowing river and he

increased his race towards the direction, hoping to find help of some sort.

Getting to the river he saw a man in a boat who strangely came to fetch wood in this remote lonely bush. So he called out for help and the man in the boat heard and responded to him. He came down, cut the rope that

bound his hands and rowed him across to desired destination.

The once hostage, who now has freedom, wondered how he strangely got off the hood over his face, located the right direction and met the fair skinned, tall and handsome man at the right time, in an unbelievable location. He thought to himself and said “God how mysterious are your ways. We only just need to put across a call and you come

racing down. Thank you once again!”

Many are doing a blind escape in a world that holds them hostage with failure and backwardness; with evident lack of success, fulfillment, satisfaction, direction and poverty. They keep making attempts towards escape but are blind to direction. And so stumble severally without progress but

with saddled limitations.

Some have even used their self imagination, perception and well crafted self ambition but have made little progress to nowhere; just as the man in the hood, making a blind

escape.

Many have become very wise to call on God who created every man with a purpose to open their eyes and

show the direction to follow to destiny.

When you call on God, he will answer and open your eyes to catch the vision of direction to destiny (Jeremiah 33:3). When God opens your eyes and you catch the vision of your purpose, you will begin to run towards destination with progress. Effort becomes blissful and you will always meet help at the right time,

along the way to go across - just like the man in the hood.

Stop making a blind escape! What you need is vision for life and God is the only road map you need out.

Discovering your purpose is the greatest discovery you can make. It is a vision driven discovery you need, to

get life straight!

Wess morgan

Weiss morgan

Op rah Winfrey interviews Whitney Houston's

daughter

Bobbi Kristina

T he new interview that Oprah Winfrey conducted with

members of Whitney Houston's family was watched by many viewers, and by the fans of the singer. Winfrey interviewed Houston's brother, sister-in-law, and her daughter, Bobbi Kris-tina.

Fans of the singer Whitney Houston were shocked when the news was announced last month that the star had suddenly passed. Those closest to her have been left devastated, and it is clear that there will be many that will miss the singer.

The interview with Bobbi Kristina especially was highly-anticipated, and there were many viewers that tuned in to watch. It appears that Bobbi Kristina is doing well, despite eve-rything, and as she told Winfrey, she is doing as well "as can be expected." Fans around the world are wishing her all the best during this time, and are wishing her well.

Whitney Houston is one of the most successful singers of all-time, and she has many fans that are deeply saddened by what has happened. Houston's legacy of music will live on, and it is clear that the fans will be eager to watch the new movie that she is starring in, Sparkle.

_________________________________________________________________________

Katrina-Kasey Wheeler is a college graduate. She holds a Bachelor of Arts in Political Science from a private Jesuit University, and is a freelance entertainment journalist. Ms. Wheeler enjoys watching television programs that educate and inspire.

By Katrina K. Wheeler

TV Examiner

OPRAH EMBRACES BOBBI KRISTINA

Whitney Houston and Bobbi Kristina

Oprah Interviews Bobbi Kristina

By Sarah Hearn

2012 Essence Music Festi-

val

set for July 6-8 in New Or-

leans

T he 2012 Essence Music Festival (EMF) will be held July 6-8 in New

Orleans. Some of the biggest names in music will perform including the Aretha Franklin, Mary J. Blige, Fantasia,

Stephanie Mills, Ledisi, Kindred the Family Soul, The Stylistics, Charlie Wilson and many more.

There will be all-star gospel tribute to Fred Hammond and Mary Mary. Essence will also honor the Queen of Soul, Aretha Franklin with the Power Award during her performance. The Essence Empowerment Experience will show-case the country's leading thinkers, innovators, and communicators including Steve Harvey, Rev. Al Sharpton,

Rep. Maxine Waters and Dr. Steve Perry.

For information about ticket sales, accommodations and the latest news about EMF, visitwww.essencemusicfestival.com. Follow EMF on Twitter @essencemusic #EssenceFest. Become a fan of the 2012 Essence Music Festival on Facebook.

Advertisement

Fans can get a head start on memorabilia. Essence is offering official EMF merchandise including t-shirts, hats, bags and more. In honor of the 18th anniversary of EMF, shoppers will get 18% off orders March 19-April 6. Visit www.essencemusicfestival.com, the Essence Facebook page or call 877-687-4277.

_________________________________________________________________________

Sarah, DC Gospel Music Examiner has been a fan of gospel music since childhood. Her published interviews in-clude Cece Winans, Fred Hammond, Richard Smallwood, Andraé Crouch, Martha Munizzi and Charles Butler. Her work has been cited in Cross Rhythms, EurWeb.com and other publications. Residing in the Metro DC area, Sarah leads the International Missions Team at her church and has traveled to Haiti, Nicaragua and Kenya. Sarah is a member of the Gospel Music Association (GMA) Contact Sarah. (This article was first printed on

Profile – Joel Osteen

Joel Osteen is a pastor for a new generation. Referred to by many as a voice of hope, Joel Osteen reaches one of the

largest audiences in the U.S. and across the globe. Joel is the Senior Pastor of Lakewood Church in Houston, TX,

which according to Forbes magazine is America’s largest church drawing more than 40,000 attendees each week. It is

also one of the most diverse. Tens of millions of people worldwide are inspired through his weekly television broad-

casts, his New York Times bestselling books, his popular weekly podcast, and his sold-out worship events in arenas

and stadiums across the US and abroad. Joel and his wife, Victoria, have taken “A Night of Hope” to over 65 cities

across America and abroad since late 2004, filling arenas to capacity crowds, including Madison Square Garden seven

times, and totaling more than one million attendees. On April 25, 2009, just nine days after opening day, Joel and

Victoria held the first, non-baseball event, “A Historic Night of Hope,” at Yankee Stadium with nearly 50,000 attendees

and millions more through the televised event. The following year, Joel and Victoria filled Dodger Stadium and again

millions more watched the televised and online event.

According to Nielsen Media Research, Joel is the most watched, inspirational figure in America. His weekly television

broadcast is viewed by more than 10 million American households each week in nearly 100 nations around the world.

Joel Osteen’s audio podcast is downloaded nearly four million times each month and every day nearly a million people

request Joel and Victoria’s “Daily Inspirational Message” electronically. Joel is a three-time, New York Times bestselling

author. His first book, Your Best Life Now debuted at the top of the New York Times bestseller list and quickly rose to

#1. His second book, Become a Better You debuted at #1 on the New York Times bestseller list in October of 2007.

Joel’s most recent book, It’s Your Time debuted at #1 on the New York Times bestseller list in November of 2009.

A native Texan and the son of John Osteen – a highly respected minister of the Gospel and the founder of Lakewood

Church – Joel attended Oral Roberts University in Tulsa, Oklahoma, where he studied radio and television communica-

tions. In 1982, Joel returned to Houston and founded Lakewood’s television ministry where he produced John Os-

teen’s televised sermons for 17 years until January 1999 when his father passed away.

For many years, John Osteen encouraged Joel to preach, but he always declined preferring to work behind the

scenes. In early 1999, Joel felt compelled to accept his father’s invitation, and he preached his first sermon on Janu-

ary 17th of that year. Little did anyone know that would be the last Sunday of John Osteen’s life. Two weeks later,

Joel began preaching and later that year was installed as the new Senior Pastor of Lakewood Church. Almost immedi-

(Continued on page 35)

ately, weekly attendance began to grow at an extraordinary rate and in 2005, Joel moved Lakewood Church into its pre-

sent location, the former Compaq Center, a 16,000-seat arena that was once home to the Houston Rockets professional

basketball team.

Joel’s extraordinary success can be found in his core message: That our God is a good God who desires to bless those

who are obedient and faithful to Him through Jesus Christ. It is Joel’s deepest desire that his own life be an example of

that principle, and that everyone who hears this message of hope and encouragement would choose to accept salvation

through Jesus Christ and God’s goodness and mercy to become all that God wants them to be.

Profile - Victoria Osteen

Victoria Osteen has always had a passion and energy for life that is contagious. Working alongside her husband, Pastor

Joel Osteen, Victoria serves as co-pastor of Lakewood Church in Houston, Texas.

Under Pastor Joel and Victoria's leadership, Lakewood Church has grown in every area of ministry and has become the

largest and most diverse congregation in America today with over 40,000 attending weekly services.

As co-pastor, Victoria is an integral part of each service at Lakewood and Joel Osteen’s worship events across the U.S.

and abroad. As a wife and mother of two children, Victoria is an inspiration and mentor to women everywhere. She is

committed to helping women, children and families discover their purpose and reach their highest potential in Christ.

Her desire to meet the needs of women led her to found the Women’s Ministry at Lakewood Church to strengthen and

develop the lives of married, single and professional women. She also founded the Victoria Osteen Literacy Program to

get books into the hands of children and help break the cycle of illiteracy in the home. The program began by helping

an orphanage in Africa. In partnership with First Book and her publisher, Victoria has donated new books and held

reading events for children in Houston and New York City. Victoria supports The Bridge (a battered women’s shelter in

Houston), and the Greater Southwest Houston Chamber of Commerce honored Victoria Osteen with a Community Im-

pact Award in 2006.

A life-long Houstonian, Victoria attended the University of Houston while working as a senior buyer in her family's fine

jewelry business. In 1986, her life changed when she met Joel for the first time. A year and a half later, they were

married, and she left her family's business to devote herself to full-time ministry. She soon began traveling to the

world's most impoverished villages in countries such as India, sharing the good news of Jesus Christ.

A Permanent Place of Provision

Posted by Joel Osteen on 2/24/2012 I want to tell you a story about a young lady in our church. She is a single parent, a hard worker, and a faith-ful volunteer. She's always done her best to provide a living for her family, but always struggled in her fi-nances. She has her college degree and a good job, but at the end of every month, she barely has enough to pay her bills. She wanted to take her children on vacation, but every time she tried to save up extra funds, something would break or an unexpected bill would come in. She just couldn't get ahead. But she didn't get discouraged. She didn't start complaining. She just kept being faithful and productive; she kept honoring God and loving people. I would see her all the time at the church giving, serving and helping others. God says, "When you abide in Me, you will bear much fruit. Not only that, your fruit will remain." That means not temporary favor, but permanent favor; not a season of blessing, but a lifetime of blessing. Because you keep abiding in Him, God won't let you live a life of constant struggle. This young lady was obviously abiding in Him. You could just tell by the smile on her face and her demeanor. About four years ago, this lady's supervisor took an unexpected, early retirement, and she was given that po-sition. With that position came an incredible increase in her salary. She was very grateful. But then, about a month ago she told me that one of the vice-presidents of their company suddenly resigned, and she was given that position. She said, "Joel, now I'm making more than ten times what I made when I first started." Today, she doesn't live under that constant financial pressure. She has more than enough. She can take her children on vacation whenever she wants. Now, she supports another single parent family as well. She has been blessed to be a blessing! Friend, that's what God wants for you. He wants to promote you and set you on high. You may be in tough times right now. You may be struggling. But don't let a spirit of lack get on the inside of you. Where you are today is not where you're going to stay. God has so much more in your future. If you will stay submitted to Him, if you will follow His Word and be faithful with what you have, then you're going to come in to a per-manent place of provision. Keep praying, keep believing, keep hoping because your "due season" is on the way!

Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up

(Galatians 6:9, NIV).

Joel & Victoria Osteen

AMERICA’S

NIGHTOF HOPE with Joel & Victoria Osteen will be coming to Washington, D.C. and other ar-eas.

Albany, NY Friday, March 16Times Union

Center

Washington, DC Saturday, April 28National's

Park

Birmingham, AL Friday, May 18Birmingham-

Jefferson Convention Complex (BJCC)

Denver, CO Friday, June 1Pepsi Center

Jacksonville, FL Friday, November 30

Los Angeles, CA Friday, October 26

Okla. City, OK Friday, September 28

Kansas City, MO Friday, September 21

Puerto Rico, PR Friday, August 10

Cleveland, OH Friday, July 13

WWW.JOELOSTEEN.COM

By Marci Savage

Zone 8 Street Thug

to Prison

to Community

Activist

T he Civil Rights Movement has evolved. It was born long before the 60’s, but the more recent leaders we

remember are Martin Luther King, Malcolm X, and Rosa Parks. The leaders in these movements are our fathers, moth-ers, grandmothers, and grandfathers. Their work has left an

indelible mark on our society.

The need to fight for civil rights has not diminished. Detroit has a need for strong leadership in its neighborhoods. A revo-lution is happening in its streets, and the next generation has taken up the mantle of responsibility and is tackling the issues of poverty, illiteracy, education, incarceration

and the deterioration of the neighborhood.

Yusef Bunchy Shakur is a community activist who runs Urban Network located on Grand River in Detroit

(Continued on page 39)

right off of I-94. Walking in the door of the brightly painted yellow building, it is warm and inviting. It is a safe place for the community, especially the youth, to hang out, have some food, and maybe watch some TV or read while sitting on one of the comfortable leather couches in the lounge. It also doubles as a bookstore and library. The wall is full of books that kids don’t typically have access to in school giving them unprecedented access to their culture. In another corner, there are computers set up for access to the Internet, yet another im-portant tool that many in the community don’t have day-to-day. Each area is carefully thought out and utilized

to its maximum potential.

There are also outreach programs done by Urban Network, such as “Restoring the Neighbor Back to the Hood Family Fun Day: School Supply Give Away” which this year provided over 500 backpacks to area youth, up from 250 backpacks the previous year. There is live entertainment, free food, and prize giveaways. But the

most important component is to provide a safe and drama-free environment for people to act neighborly.

It wasn’t until I talked with Yusef and read his book that I understood his deep commitment to the community.

Yusef was born Joseph “JoJo” Lee Ruffin. His parents were teenagers and he ended up being raised in a single parent household. With no adequate father figure, he was running the streets. “I was an angry hurtful kid who used fighting as a form of therapy. By 13 I had co-founded the notorious street gang, Zone 8 and by 15 I had

been kicked out of every public school in the area.”

His lifestyle, or “death” style as he termed it, led him to be convicted for a crime he did not commit and he was sent to prison. “It was there that I met my father for the first time.” His father had been sent to prison several years ago. In his book he writes, “During my time with my father, he became my brother, teacher, comrade and mentor through stimulating a meaningful father and son relationship.” His father took the opportunity to guide him onto a path that would lead him to become a strong man and a leader, and not more hardened by his

experience.

After nine years in prison, he emerged as Yusef Bunchy Shakur and returned back to the neighborhood he used to terrorize in his youth. While he was in prison, his first son was born. He knew that he had to do everything in his power to ensure that his son would not follow the same path that he and his father had. He continued to develop his skills. He became a community organizer, Head Start teacher, youth mentor, business owner, au-

thor, motivational speaker, and a college graduate.

When you meet him he is a large soft-spoken man. Watching him give a speech, he transforms into a passion-ate, fiery and bold orator. He believes strongly in what he is saying, and believes strongly in his community and what they can accomplish, especially the youth. Having strong men in the community would help young

boys to see what it means to be a strong man and not have to turn to the streets like he did.

“My goal was to establish a healthy community. I wanted a safe place for people to go, for people to develop skills.” says Shakur. “I would like to see a Youth Entrepreneurship Program and programs that focus on af-

fordable housing. More opportunities for internships. Maybe even scholarships.

(Continued from page 38)

His experiences gave him a far different perspective, insight and authenticity as to how to approach prob-lems. It’s that thoughtful reflection and analysis that makes Yusef so remarkable. The rolling-up of his sleeves and following through on his vision is what makes him more than that. This is a person who has overcome great adversity and has not allowed it to make him hard and bitter, but allowed it to transform

him into a strong warrior and leader in his community

In Yusef’s book there is a quote from Marianne Williamson:

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, and fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It’s not just in some of us; it’s in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we uncon-sciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence

automatically liberates others.”

Yusef has learned how to shine, and by doing so he is showing other young men in his community that they

can shine too. From his words to his actions, he is following his heart by letting others know his story.

“I wrote from my heart. I wanted people to travel my journey from the beginning, from JoJo to Yusef. I let

honesty be my guide.”

Price

$14.99

THE WINDOW THE WINDOW THE WINDOW THE WINDOW

TO MY SOUL TO MY SOUL TO MY SOUL TO MY SOUL

CAN BE ORDERED AT THE FOLLOWING CAN BE ORDERED AT THE FOLLOWING CAN BE ORDERED AT THE FOLLOWING CAN BE ORDERED AT THE FOLLOWING

A Mission and Passion for service:

Helps Homeless Women in Boston

by Susan Holaday – (Leadership)

BOSTON - Sharon Reilly grew up on a sharecropper's farm in Mississippi in the '50s and '60s, developing a passion for social justice that over the years, drove her from the corporate world in Arkansas to Boston in 2003, bringing with her skills that came from years in

higher education and Fortune 500 companies.

T oday, she serves as executive director of the Women's Lunch Place, a shelter providing meals and numerous services ranging from

legal, social, educational and healthcare for homeless women in need of healthy, nutrititious meals and a

hand to help them along the way.

Originally, WLP was founded in 1982 by two women who'd met as volunteers at the South End homeless shelter, Pine Street Inn. It quickly met a need as the homeless population grew, in part due to changes in

the state's handling of mental health patients.

Open six days a week, it offered nutritious, whole-some meals to homeless women and their children in space in the basement of Church of the Covenant. The first meal was served to a dozen women on Nov. 15, 1982 and meals were offered three days a week. By '84, a fourth day of service was added with a fifth following

in '86. By 1996, WLP was operating six days a week.

In 1992, a former homeless woman was hired to provide advocacy services to the homeless guests, a program

which developed quickly into an Advocacy and Legal Assistance Program.

By 2005, a full time cook was hired and today, the program offers services to more than 150 women and children.

This year, Reilly spearheaded an effort that raised $3 million to renovate the space, adding a medical suite where women can talk privately with physicians about health issues. The goal is to extend hours of service. The expan-sion enabled the creation of a new Creative Expressions room, a Resource Center and more ways to help WLP's

guests.

"When I invited the board of Women's Lunch Place to embark on a capital campaign," Reilly recalls, "I told them we had this window of opportunity to move the needle in our industry and that a renovated facility would help us do that. I believe that in the area of food and nutrition, we are ahead on so many fronts. In program evaluation, we are in a lead position evaluating the impact of our work in the lives of women and especially, senior women, in a population that is not well represented and yet makes up a large segment of our total population. We've made it our business to support

women who are poor and homeless and we do it without a lot of red tape."

WLP, she adds, took a dingy basement and transformed it into a modern home for women and children. "That allowed us to meet unmet needs in a number of key areas that are linked to the quality of life. We added an additional shower, so more women can take showers and minimize public health risks. We added another washer/dryer to give them access to clean clothes. We expanded the nap room to give them more rest during the day; and our resource center was expanded to help them rethread their lives. We have more emphasis on jobs services and skills building. We realize that when

women are stabilized, families tend to stabilize as well."

"We are providing basic services in a sluggish economy at a time when more and more women are utilizing our services. The balance is off, and yet without the services and supports that we provide, the outcome would be devastating for even

more women."

our resource center was expanded to help them rethread their lives. We have more emphasis on jobs services and skills

building. We realize that when women are stabilized, families tend to stabilize as well."

"We are providing basic services in a sluggish economy at a time when more and more women are utilizing our services. The balance is off, and yet without the services and supports that we provide, the outcome would be devastating for even

more women."

When Christians Drink

by Dr. Ken Matto

T here is a mode of thought which pervades the Christian

mind and that is the error of believing that Christian Lib-

erty is the same as the freedom to sin. This happens when

supposed Christians buy into the worldly philosophy of

egoistic hedonism which teaches that happiness is the goal of all conduct. This is brought about by churches

which teach personal euphoria rather than sound obedience to God’s Word. I would also like to include those

Christians who smoke. I have already written a monograph on Christian Liberty and we all know the degener-

ating effects alcohol and tobacco have on our bodies so therefore I am not going to dwell on this aspect. I am

going to dwell on the witness aspect of concession with the world. Recently a person e-mailed me and vehe-

mently disagreed with another article I had on my web site concerning drinking alcohol. He was thoroughly

convinced he could have a Budweiser in one hand and a Bible in the other, and still proclaim he was a Chris-

tian. If this person was standing on the corner with a few friends drinking beer and you saw them, how would

you distinguish who was the Christian and who wasn’t? Let me tell you how you would know. The Christian

would be the one bowing his head and giving thanks for the beer. (Just Kidding)

Whenever a

Christian par-

takes in any

worldly pleas-

ure such as

drinking or

smoking, it

definitely af-

fects their testi-

mony. Now I

am not speak-

ing of worldly

pleasures such

as vacations,

enjoying the

beach or mountains, or just going to the park. I am thoroughly convinced the Lord has given us those things to

allow us to take a break from the fast pace of the world. These things can be enjoyed without them doing any

physical harm to our bodies, in fact, they can help rejuvenate us. Here are some facts taken from the Encyclo-

pedia Brittanica about Ethyl Alcohol which is the chief ingredient of all alcoholic drinks. It is anything but

good for the body. Poison ingested in any amount or form in the human body does not help it but always has a

degenerating effect.

Ethyl Alcohol

Ethyl Alcohol also called Ethanol, Grain Alcohol, or Alcohol, the most important member of a class of organic

compounds that are given the general name alcohols; its molecular formula is C2H5OH.

It is the intoxicating ingredient of many beverages produced by fermentation. Pure ethanol is a colorless, flam-

mable liquid (boiling point 78.5º C [173.3º F]) with an agreeable ethereal odour and a burning taste. Ethanol

is toxic, affecting the central nervous system. Moderate amounts stimulate the mind and relax the muscles,

but larger amounts impair coordination and judgment, finally producing coma and death. It is an addictive

drug leading to alcoholism or drunkenness as the Bible calls it.

We have briefly seen that even the encyclopedias report that Ethyl Alcohol is a toxin and no thinking person is

ever going to try and convince themselves that toxins in any amount are good for the body, and this goes for

both Christians and non-Christians alike. A person may choose to ignore this information but the fact remains

Ethyl Alcohol is a poison to the body and no amount of ignorance can overcome reality. At this time I want to

share 5 testimonies that we lose when we take up the mantle of worldly living.

Internal Testimony

Whenever we begin to walk with the world in even the slightest manner we lose the purity of our internal testi-

mony. In other words, whenever we witness to an unbeliever or counsel a Christian we begin to feel like a

hypocrite in that we are telling the unbeliever his sins will cast him into hell and we are partaking in the same

sin he is.

(Rom 2:21-22 KJV) Thou therefore which teachest another, teachest thou not thyself? thou that preachest a

man should not steal, dost thou steal? {22} Thou that sayest a man should not commit adultery, dost thou com-

mit adultery? thou that abhorrest idols, dost thou commit sacrilege?

The Bible warns us about hypocritical witness. How can we counsel a Christian about the dangers of sin which

we are partaking in ourselves. Just because we refuse to think of worldly compromise as sin, God deems any

compromise with the world system as sin.

(1 John 2:15-16 KJV) Love not the world, neither the things that are in the world. If any man love the world,

the love of the Father is not in him. {16} For all that is in the world, the lust of the flesh, and the lust of the

eyes, and the pride of life, is not of the Father, but is of the world.

This includes the ingestion of alcoholic beverage because it is of the world. Whenever we compromise our in-

ternal testimony it confuses us and you will have trouble knowing who you belong to. This is why so many

Christians walk around wondering if they are saved or not. If Christians started stripping away their pet sins,

their internal testimony will return in full confidence of who they belong to and then they will be able to wit-

ness in confidence.

External Testimony

Another testimony we lose is our external testimony in that others see us and we lose our testimony to them.

How can we go to others and say we are Christians when we are partaking in a worldly concession. Every

Christian has a responsibility to other Christians. Billy Graham has lost his external testimony when he had his

picture taken with the Pope. Jimmy Swaggart lost his testimony when he was exposed concerning the prosti-

tute. Jim Baker lost his testimony when his cloaked lifestyle with Jessica was exposed. Jerry Falwell lost his

testimony when he courted the Sodomites. Some of these men may not be saved but their testimony to the

world was that they are Christians and as a result of compromise they have lost their testimony. The world

now sees Christians as a pack of frauds. You see when one Christian is exposed for wrong it affects every sin-

gle believer because the world lumps us together as one entity. Your testimony to other Christians works in the

same way.

(1 Cor 8:9-13 KJV) But take heed lest by any means this liberty of yours become a stumblingblock to them

that are weak. {10} For if any man see thee which hast knowledge sit at meat in the idol's temple, shall not the

conscience of him which is weak be emboldened to eat those things which are offered to idols; {11} And

through thy knowledge shall the weak brother perish, for whom Christ died? {12} But when ye sin so against

the brethren, and wound their weak conscience, ye sin against Christ. {13} Wherefore, if meat make my

brother to offend, I will eat no flesh while the world standeth, lest I make my brother to offend.

Here Paul is stating to the Corinthians that just because they are freed from keeping the requirements of the

law, they have a solemn responsibility to other believers, especially new Christians who can easily be thrown

off course by observing the actions of those who are supposed to know better. The Bible in these passages

teach us that if another Christian can stumble in their beliefs because of a wrong or questionable action on my

part, then it is best not to partake. Those Christians who like to drink or smoke in front of others are in essence

saying they don’t care about others. They just want to have their own pet sins. Their attitude is that it is no

one’s business what I do. Your actions are affecting other Christians and you are responsible for your actions

especially when they confuse and possibly draw another Christian into your sin. Preachers who drink alcohol

and then teach the congregation that it is okay and that they are exercising Christian liberty are nothing more

than vipers in the pulpit.

Actually I like to refer to them as Pulpit Prostitutes. Isn’t it interesting that a man or woman can be arrested for

selling their body but the church promotes and gives raises and perks to those who sell out their testimony?

Your external testimony is a very fragile thing and must be guarded so it is not tainted intentionally. How can a

person who is holding on to the very sins which sent Christ to the cross teach the true gospel? He cannot, he

must conform it to his own personal prejudices.

(Mat 12:34 KJV) O generation of vipers, how can ye, being evil, speak good things? for out of the abun-

dance of the heart the mouth speaketh.

(Rom 14:21 KJV) It is good neither to eat flesh, nor to drink wine, nor any thing whereby thy brother stum-

bleth, or is offended, or is made weak.

God-ward Testimony

Another testimony we lose is our God-ward testimony. It gives the idea that God accepts questionable behav-

ior by His children. There are some denominations which believe that their clergy can forgive sins and be like

a "Savior by proxy." The denomination I belonged to some years back believed by answering 4 questions at

time of communion, the presiding minister could pronounce the remission of your sins. This is the attitude that

carries over with some people when they become saved. The problem is that we represent the Lord Jesus

Christ on this earth.

(2 Cor 5:20 KJV) Now then we are ambassadors for Christ, as though God did beseech you by us: we pray you

in Christ's stead, be ye reconciled to God.

Whenever we begin to adopt ideas that it is permissible to start drinking alcohol, then the world looks at us and

begins to believe that God accepts sinful behavior. I remember many years ago I was walking on the board-

walk in Seaside Heights, NJ and I was handed a tract which I started reading. The tract stated that there was

nothing wrong with having sex because God is the one who created it. They of course were not speaking of

having sex in marriage but outside of marriage. I do not believe they were Christians but some kind of cult, yet

that tract made an impression on me, because over 30 years later I remember it. People tend to remember the

things that are not right with us rather than the things which are.

This is why it is dangerous to embrace an idea that it is okay to drink alcohol because people will think it is

accepted by God. When a person sees a Christian with a beer, they will immediately think that God approves

it. The fact is that God commands His children to be holy which means to be separate. This means to be sepa-

rated from the philosophies of the world which propel and set a person’s behavior.

(Lev 20:7 KJV) Sanctify yourselves therefore, and be ye holy: for I am the LORD your God.

(1 Pet 1:15-16 KJV) But as he which hath called you is holy, so be ye holy in all manner of conversation; {16}

Because it is written, Be ye holy; for I am holy.

The holiness of the Christian is to be set apart from the rest of the world which includes the ideas and the ac-

tions which are spawned from those ideas. God saves us with the express intent of bearing spiritual fruit not to

become entangled with the world from which were delivered from. Our responsibility as Christians is to please

God and not to please the world. There is no way to hold a Bible in one hand and a Budweiser in the other and

still be a holy testimony for Christ.

(2 Tim 2:3-4 KJV) Thou therefore endure hardness, as a good soldier of Jesus Christ. {4} No man that warreth

entangleth himself with the affairs of this life; that he may please him who hath chosen him to be a soldier.

Separation Testimony

When a Christian begins to drink alcohol they are showing they are not separated. Many Christians wonder

why God does not use them. God does not use a compromised Christian for the furtherance of His Kingdom.

God only uses clean vessels.

(Ezek 44:23 KJV) And they shall teach my people the difference between the holy and profane, and cause

them to discern between the unclean and the clean.

In the Old Testament God expected His people to know the difference between the holy and profane and the

clean and unclean. With the Bible we have that at our fingertips. When we drink, we are showing that we are

not separated from the ways of the world and are not discerning the difference between the two. This is be-

cause we are hindering our obedience by justifying our pet sins. Where did we ever get the idea that Christ

saved us so we can do what we want?

(Prov 23:31 KJV) Look not thou upon the wine when it is red, when it giveth his colour in the cup, when it

moveth itself aright.

Many Christians believe there are no Scriptures which prohibit the drinking of alcohol. Here is one which tells

us that we should not even look upon the red wine in the cup. Looking comes before drinking. Alcoholic bev-

erage is such a snare that God does not even want His children looking at it because He knows how strong

temptation can be and how inadequate the flesh is in handling it. The object that distinguishes the real Chris-

tian from the false Christian is our separation from the world. Nowhere in Scripture are we to go back into the

sins of the old nature. Alcohol is a sin of the old nature.

(Rom 14:7-8 KJV) For none of us liveth to himself, and no man dieth to himself. {8} For whether we live, we

live unto the Lord; and whether we die, we die unto the Lord: whether we live therefore, or die, we are the

Lord's.

(Rom 13:14 KJV) But put ye on the Lord Jesus Christ, and make not provision for the flesh, to fulfil the lusts

thereof.

Alcohol ministers to the flesh and does not minister to the spirit. Ask yourself the question, while you are

drinking beer or whiskey, how much thought do you give to the things of the Lord? NONE, because you are

too busy feeling a falsely induced euphoria.

Identification Testimony

The fifth testimony that you lose is your identification testimony. When you drink alcohol, people do not know

of what Kingdom you are identified with. It is a shame when you have to tell someone you are a Christian be-

cause your actions prove otherwise. When you do this, what do you think goes through people’s minds when

you stress you are a Christian and you are drinking alcohol? In their mind, you are one of them and there is no

difference. This is why people feel comfortable in their false churches because they see God’s regenerated

Christians doing the same thing, so they figure they are on the road to heaven when in reality they are on the

way to hell. Losing one’s identification with the Kingdom of God is like losing one’s mental capacities.

Summary

Christians who drink alcohol carry ruined testimonies to the outside world and also to those in the church. One

group I have not mentioned that is always hurt by poor testimonies are children. They tend to follow the par-

ents in their training. Don’t you think it is confusing to a child to see Daddy or Mommy praying and then have

a few beers or smokes? When the children begin to emulate this pattern for themselves, will the parents then

beat them for learning their sinful ways? Ask yourself the following question the next time you pop a top or

light up, "What spiritual benefit do I gain from this?" Any compromise with the world will always ruin your

testimony and keep you from growing in your Christian walk. You may be angry for reading this but the fact

remains:

(1 Cor 6:20 KJV) For ye are bought with a price: therefore glorify God in your body, and in your spirit,

which are God's.

Drinking alcohol does not glorify God in your body, instead it actually begins to destroy your body which is

the violation of the sixth commandment.

(1 Cor 10:31 KJV) Whether therefore ye eat, or drink, or whatsoever ye do, do all to the glory of God.

(Col 3:17 KJV) And whatsoever ye do in word or deed, do all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks

to God and the Father by him.

I leave you with this one thought. Do you believe you can sit a six pack of beer in front of you and then say to

the Lord, "I drink this beer to your glory?" If you can drink alcohol to the glory of God and in the name of the

Lord Jesus, then guzzle. If you can’t, then don’t, it is never too late to regain and repair your testimony for

Christ. When a Christian loses their testimony to the world, they lose the most precious aspect of their salva-

tion. When they lose their testimony to the brethren, they lose the trust and respect others had for them and as

the Scripture states:

(Luke 16:11 KJV) If therefore ye have not been faithful in the unrighteous mammon, who will commit to your

trust the true riches?

TO CONFRONT OR NOT TO CONFRONT By Deborah Peques

W henever you are faced with an interper-sonal conflict or a situation where some-one is behaving in a way that is destruc-tive to himself or others, you have to

make three basic decisions:

• whether to confront

• when to confront, and

• the words to use

Perhaps you are asking, "Should I confront every of-fense?" Absolutely not! "A man's wisdom gives him pa-tience; it is to his glory to overlook an of-fense" (Proverbs 19:11 NIV). I believe the operative word in this passage is "an". In general, we would be wise to overlook the one-time insignificant slights, digs, and other annoyances that are a fact of everyday life.

However, we cannot overlook a negative behavior pattern. Most people will chose to avoid a confronta-

tion and in so doing, create even bigger relational and other problems.

As always, the answer to life's problems can be found in the word of God. The Bible admonishes us to

confront in three different situations:

Z when we are offended,

Z when we are the offender, and

Z when a brother or sister engages in sinful, self-destructive, or unwise behavior

In all three instances, we are commanded to take the initiative in dealing with the issue. Let us look at

each one and see what the Scriptures says about them.

When We Are Offended In Matthew 18:15, Jesus said, "Moreover if your brother sins against you, go and tell him his fault between you and him alone. If he hears you, you have gained your brother" (NKJV). This is a clear admonition to confront the offender. In the subsequent verses, Jesus gave further instruc-tions how to get others involved in the offending party does not listen to you. In this book, however, we will only focus dealing with personal, individual confrontations. Most Christians believe that it is a sign of humility and godliness to suffer silently when hurt or offended and to repress their anger. Repressing your anger or frustration is unwise. Every repressed emotion gets expressed somewhere. Some people will

(Continued on page 52)

choose to eat too much; others may turn to alcohol or drug, while another may shop or become workaholics in order to work through the frustration of not confronting. The medical profession has many documented cases of illnesses rooted in resentment and unforgiveness. I sat with a woman at a Christian women's luncheon once who had suffered a stroke. When I asked her what had led to her condition, she said that she never spoke up when things bothered her. I have since interviewed a number of stroke victims and their responses are almost identical; they consistently buried their anger and never spoke up when hurt or offended. Paul admonished us to be on guard against bitterness: "See to it that no one misses the grace of God and that no bitter root grows up to cause trouble and defile many (Hebrews 12:15 NIV). Effective confrontation is by far one of the best safeguard against a root of bitterness. Bitterness is accumulated resentment; resentment is unresolved anger that has been "re-sent" or repressed rather than being put on the table and dealt with through effective confron-tation. In order for anything to take root, it must be underneath the surface. We can prevent anger from getting a stronghold on us by not allowing it to go underground. There are some people who have such low boiling points or so much repressed anger and frustration that they explode at the slightest provocation. I call this the "simmer and blow" syndrome. Obviously, this type of reaction does not fix the problem; in fact, it can make it worse. Christians who carry these emotions around become dysfunctional before they know it. Dysfunctional simply means that something is not functioning or working according to its original purpose. Any dysfunc-

tional behavior in a Christian is Satan's trap to keep him frustrated so that he will not fulfill his divine purpose.

When We Are the Offender

When we offend or become aware that we have offended another, it is our responsibility to actively work toward reconciliation. Jesus said, "Therefore if you bring your gift to the altar, and there remember that your brother has something against you, leave your gift there before the altar, and go your way. First be rec-onciled to your brother, and then come and of-

fer your gift. (Matthew 5:23-24).

When we sense that someone has started to avoid us or we feel a strain in our relationship, it's time to take action. My husband and I often challenge each other to model our conviction that the person who is more spiritually mature is always the one who initiates the reconcilia-tion. Spiritually and emotionally immature

people wait for others to build bridges to them.

When We Observe a Brother's Destructive

Behavior

You may find yourself in a situation when you have to confront someone, not because his be-havior is negatively impacting you personally but rather having an undesirable effect on him or a group. The apostle Paul admonished the church at Galatia, "Dear brothers and sisters, if another Christian is overcome by some sin, you who are godly should gently and humbly help that person back onto the right path. And be careful not to fall into the same temptation your-

self" (Galatians 6:1).

Most people gossip when they see a brother or sister overtaken in a fault or other ungodly behavior. Few con-front. Now understand that Paul's admonition is directed to someone who is in a relationship with the one who

needs to be confronted. This passage is not a license for legalistic Christians to force their man-made rules onto naive new converts. I have seen babes in Christ become turned off with the church because some unwise person confronted her about her outward appearance. Why not take the time to disciple such newcomers in the word of God and to minister to their other needs first? In other words, earn the right to be heard. Once you es-tablish yourself as a non-judgmental and caring supporter, further admonition and correction of new converts may be unnecessary. Notwithstanding, regardless of a person's professed level of spiritual maturity, everyone is subject to falling into sin or unwise behavior. Therefore, when we see a brother or sister straying from the godly path it is our Christian obligation to "restore such a one". No one has 20-20 vision when looking at him-self; we all have blind spots. It often takes someone with objective, spiritual eyes to shine the light on our

blindness.

When confronting someone about his destructive behavior, you can expect excuses and defensiveness. No one really relishes the idea of coming to grips with his faults, weaknesses or shortcomings. It is a natural response to become defensive. *** Defensiveness helps us to protect ourselves against the pain of the truth.*** Expect it, and don't be turned off by it when you confront someone about his behavior. Job said, "How painful are honest words" (Job 6:25 NIV). Many will either blame others for their actions or try to justify them. Biblical "blamers" include Eve ("the serpent made me do it" (Genesis 3:13)), Aaron ("you know how wicked these people are" (Exodus 32:22), and countless others. Not everyone will respond as King David did when the prophet Nathan confronted him about sleeping with Bathsheba and then having her husband killed. He said, "I

have sinned against the Lord. . ." (2 Samuel 12:13).

Rejected Input

I have shipped many packages from our local post office. After a few of them were returned, I began to see some similarities with how input can be rejected during a confrontation. The reasons that my postal packages have been returned were due primarily to insufficient postage, an improper address, or rejection by addressee.

Let's take a brief look at the application of each of these reasons as they relate to confrontation.

"Insufficient postage" is a result of not paying or investing enough to send the package. As previously men-tioned, when giving feedback on someone's behavior-especially in a non-work environment-you need to earn the right to be heard. This means that you have invested enough in the relationship for the person to know that

you have a genuine concern for their well being.

An "improper address" is the result not addressing the person in a positive manner, that is, using the wrong

tone, showing hostility, being judgmental, and any other approach that is deemed a turn-off.

"Rejection by address" occurs when a person simply is not ready to receive your input due to psychological reasons or his unwillingness to face certain realities during this period of his life. When you get that "return to sender" notice, understand that it is outside your realm of influence. You've done your part. Pray for his recep-

tivity to the truth and for God to send somebody across his path that he will hear and heed.

Paul versus Peter: "Stop Your Hypocrisy!"

Paul, a "Johnny-come-lately" disciple of our Lord, persecuted and had many Christians killed in the name of religion before he submitted to God's call on his life. Peter, on the other hand, had enjoyed a close personal

relationship with Jesus during his time on earth. He was a key figure in the early church.

Paul observed that Peter was engaging in behavior that was destructive to the church, so he confronted him.

"But when Peter came to Antioch, I had to oppose him publicly, speaking strongly against what he was doing, for it was very wrong. When he first arrived, he ate with the Gentile Christians, who don't bother with circum-cision. But afterward, when some Jewish friends of James came, Peter wouldn't eat with the Gentiles anymore because he was afraid of what these legalists would say. Then the other Jewish Christians followed Peter's hy-

pocrisy, and even Barnabas was influenced to join them in their hypocrisy. When I saw that they were not fol-lowing the truth of the Good News, I said to Peter in front of all the others, "Since you, a Jew by birth, have discarded the Jewish laws and are living like a Gentile, why are you trying to make these Gentiles obey the

Jewish laws you abandoned" (Galatians 2:11-14 NLT)?

Paul knew that many followers emulate their leader. Therefore, a leader walking in error must be confronted. Now some have said that Paul was probably envious of Peter because of his status as an original disciple, but this was not so. Paul simply wanted to see Peter and the other leaders walk according to the truth of the gospel which declared that the circumcision laws were no longer in effect. There was now no difference between

Jews and Gentiles. There was no need to prefer one group over the other.

Paul's opposing Peter "to his face" is a clear definition of a confrontation, that is, coming together face to face. Since Peter's offence was public, Paul publicly rebuked him. If public rebukes were practiced more today, per-

haps we would have fewer instances of ungodly leadership.

Paul admonished us to confront any brother or sister overtaken in a fault. We are not to be in-

timidated by anyone's rank or background.

humility and godliness to suffer silently when hurt or offended and to repress their anger. Re-pressing your anger or frustration is unwise. Every repressed emotion gets expressed somewhere. Some people will choose to eat too much; others may turn to alcohol or drug, while another may shop or become workaholics in order to work through the frustration of not confronting. The medical profession has many documented cases of illnesses rooted in resentment and unforgive-ness. I sat with a woman at a Christian women's luncheon once who had suffered a stroke. When I asked her what had led to her condition, she said that she never spoke up when things bothered her. I have since interviewed a number of stroke victims and their responses are almost identical; they consistently buried their anger and never spoke up when hurt or offended. Paul admonished us to be on guard against bitterness: "See to it that no one misses the grace of God and that no bitter root grows up to cause trouble and defile many (Hebrews 12:15 NIV). Effective confronta-tion is by far one of the best safeguard against a root of bitterness. Bitterness is accumulated re-sentment; resentment is unresolved anger that has been "re-sent" or repressed rather than being put on the table and dealt with through effective confrontation. In order for anything to take root, it must be underneath the surface. We can prevent anger from getting a stronghold on us by not allowing it to go underground. There are some people who have such low boiling points or so much repressed anger and frustration that they explode at the slightest provocation. I call this the "simmer and blow" syndrome. Obviously, this type of reaction does not fix the problem; in fact, it can make it worse. Christians who carry these emotions around become dysfunctional before they know it. Dysfunctional simply means that something is not functioning or working accord-ing to its original purpose. Any dysfunctional behavior in a Christian is Satan's trap to keep him

frustrated so that he will not fulfill his divine purpose.

When We Are the Offender

When we offend or become aware that we have offended another, it is our responsibility to actively work to-ward reconciliation. Jesus said, "Therefore if you bring your gift to the altar, and there remember that your brother has something against you, leave your gift there before the altar, and go your way. First be reconciled

to your brother, and then come and offer your gift. (Matthew 5:23-24).

When we sense that someone has started to avoid us or we feel a strain in our relationship, it's time to take ac-tion. My husband and I often challenge each other to model our conviction that the person who is more spiritu-ally mature is always the one who initiates the reconciliation. Spiritually and emotionally immature people

wait for others to build bridges to them.

Partial Listing of Keynotes /Special Guest Engagements “Today with Marilyn Hickey and

Sarah Bowling” TV program Marilyn Hickey Ministries, Inc. (TBN, DAYSTAR TV, WORD NETWORK) "Celebration" with Joni Lamb--DayStar Television (Dallas, Texas) "Lifestyle Magazine TV Show" (TBN) "It's a New Day" --Trinity Television,

Inc.(Winnipeg, Canada) West Angeles Church of God in Christ(Los Angeles, Calif.) Bishop Charles Blake, Pastor First Baptist Church of Glendarden

(Glenarden, MD) Dr.John Jenkins, Pastor Zoe Christian Fellowship (Whittier, Calif.) Edward Smith, Pastor International School of Ministry Berin and Lisa Gilfillan, Founders Cottonwood Church(Los Alamitos, Calif.) Pastors Bayless and Janet Conley The Rock Church World Outreach

Center (San Bernardino, CA) Pastors Jim and Deborah Cobrae Iron Sharpens Iron Conference Brian Doyle, National Director Glory Christian Fellowship

International Pastors Alton and Judith Temble Abundant Living Family Church

(Rancho Cucamonga, Calif.) Pastors Diego and Cindy Mesa Venice-Santa Monica Free Methodist

Church (Los Angeles, Calif.) Pastor Jim Miyabe Montreal West Church of God of

Prophecy (Montreal, Canada) Pastors Kingsley & Jacqueline Morrison Association of Zoe Christian

Fellowship Leadership Conference Bishop Frank Stewart, Overseer E.C.Reems International Empower-

ment Conference Bishop E.C. Reems, Founder Bob Harrison's Increase Conference (Maui) New Birth Baptist Church (Dallas, Tex.) NISSAN / INFINITY Corporation

(Torrance, Calif.) Urban League (Los Angeles) Texas Instruments, Inc. (Dallas, Texas) Los Angeles Police Commission City of Inglewood Police Dept.

(Inglewood, CA) Bible Enrichment Fellowship (Inglewood, Calif.) Dr. Beverly Crawford, Pastor Life Church of God in Christ (Riverside, Calif.) Bishop Ron Gibson, Pastor African American Women on Tour Oakland, Ca. Tour New Dawn Christian Villiage, Dr.Frank Wilson, Founder New Beginning Church(Camden, New Jersey) Dr. Elvin Ezekiel, Pastor Sister 2 Sister Hawaii (Honolulu, HI) Sharon Yarbrough, President

When We Observe a Brother's Destructive Behavior

You may find yourself in a situation when you have to confront someone, not because his behavior is nega-tively impacting you personally but rather having an undesirable effect on him or a group. The apostle Paul admonished the church at Galatia, "Dear brothers and sisters, if another Christian is overcome by some sin, you who are godly should gently and humbly help that person back onto the right path. And be careful not to

fall into the same temptation yourself" (Galatians 6:1).

Most people gossip when they see a brother or sister overtaken in a fault or other ungodly behavior. Few con-front. Now understand that Paul's admonition is directed to someone who is in a relationship with the one who needs to be confronted. This passage is not a license for legalistic Christians to force their man-made rules onto naive new converts. I have seen babes in Christ become turned off with the church because some unwise person confronted her about her outward appearance. Why not take the time to disciple such newcomers in the word of God and to minister to their other needs first? In other words, earn the right to be heard. Once you es-tablish yourself as a non-judgmental and caring supporter, further admonition and correction of new converts may be unnecessary. Notwithstanding, regardless of a person's professed level of spiritual maturity, everyone is subject to falling into sin or unwise behavior. Therefore, when we see a brother or sister straying from the godly path it is our Christian obligation to "restore such a one". No one has 20-20 vision when looking at him-self; we all have blind spots. It often takes someone with objective, spiritual eyes to shine the light on our

blindness.

When confronting someone about his destructive behavior, you can expect excuses and defensiveness. No one really relishes the idea of coming to grips with his faults, weaknesses or shortcomings. It is a natural response to become defensive. *** Defensiveness helps us to protect ourselves against the pain of the truth.*** Expect it, and don't be turned off by it when you confront someone about his behavior. Job said, "How painful are honest words" (Job 6:25 NIV). Many will either blame others for their actions or try to justify them. Biblical "blamers" include Eve ("the serpent made me do it" (Genesis 3:13)), Aaron ("you know how wicked these people are" (Exodus 32:22), and countless others. Not everyone will respond as King David did when the prophet Nathan confronted him about sleeping with Bathsheba and then having her husband killed. He said, "I

have sinned against the Lord. . ." (2 Samuel 12:13).

Rejected Input

I have shipped many packages from our local post office. After a few of them were returned, I began to see some similarities with how input can be rejected during a confrontation. The reasons that my postal packages have been returned were due primarily to insufficient postage, an improper address, or rejection by addressee.

Let's take a brief look at the application of each of these reasons as they relate to confrontation.

"Insufficient postage" is a result of not paying or investing enough to send the package. As previously men-tioned, when giving feedback on someone's behavior-especially in a non-work environment-you need to earn the right to be heard. This means that you have invested enough in the relationship for the person to know that

you have a genuine concern for their well being.

An "improper address" is the result not addressing the person in a positive manner, that is, using the wrong

tone, showing hostility, being judgmental, and any other approach that is deemed a turn-off.

"Rejection by address" occurs when a person simply is not ready to receive your input due to psychological reasons or his unwillingness to face certain realities during this period of his life. When you get that "return to sender" notice, understand that it is outside your realm of influence. You've done your part. Pray for his recep-

tivity to the truth and for God to send somebody across his path that he will hear and heed.

Paul versus Peter: "Stop Your Hypocrisy!"

Paul, a "Johnny-come-lately" disciple of our Lord, persecuted and had many Christians killed in the name of religion before he submitted to God's call on his life. Peter, on the other hand, had enjoyed a close personal

relationship with Jesus during his time on earth. He was a key figure in the early church.

Paul observed that Peter was engaging in behavior that was destructive to the church, so he confronted him.

"But when Peter came to Antioch, I had to oppose him publicly, speaking strongly against what he was doing, for it was very wrong. When he first arrived, he ate with the Gentile Christians, who don't bother with circum-cision. But afterward, when some Jewish friends of James came, Peter wouldn't eat with the Gentiles anymore because he was afraid of what these legalists would say. Then the other Jewish Christians followed Peter's hy-pocrisy, and even Barnabas was influenced to join them in their hypocrisy. When I saw that they were not fol-lowing the truth of the Good News, I said to Peter in front of all the others, "Since you, a Jew by birth, have discarded the Jewish laws and are living like a Gentile, why are you trying to make these Gentiles obey the

Jewish laws you abandoned" (Galatians 2:11-14 NLT)?

Paul knew that many followers emulate their leader. Therefore, a leader walking in error must be confronted. Now some have said that Paul was probably envious of Peter because of his status as an original disciple, but this was not so. Paul simply wanted to see Peter and the other leaders walk according to the truth of the gospel which declared that the circumcision laws were no longer in effect. There was now no difference between Jews and Gentiles. There was no need to prefer one group

over the other.

Paul's opposing Peter "to his face" is a clear definition of a confrontation, that is, coming together face to face. Since Pe-ter's offence was public, Paul publicly rebuked him. If public rebukes were practiced more today, perhaps we would have

fewer instances of ungodly leadership.

Paul admonished us to confront any brother or sister over-taken in a fault. We are not to be intimidated by anyone's rank

or background.

The Pegues Group P.O. Box 56382 Los Angeles, California 90056 (323) 293-5861

Fax : (323) 293-6915

Deborah Smith Pegues:

Bestselling author and international speaker, Deborah Smith Pegues, delivers sage advice on relational, financial, and emo-tional freedom for secular and religious audiences around the world. She is a high-energy, inspiring motivator, effectively incorporating humor and hard-hitting directness into her pres-entations to her never-bored listeners. Deborah has the unique ability to address readers across all social, racial, and eco-

nomic strata.

A prolific writer, her most popular book, 30 Days to Taming

the Tongue, challenges readers to embark upon 30 days of verbal abstinence from 30 negative uses of the

tongue including complaining, gossiping, lying, retaliating, etc. With sales in excess of 600,000 copies, this book has revolutionized conversations around the world. Emergency Prayers a book of crisis prayers for those times when only God can solve the problem, has redefined what it means to “pray the Word”; many have re-ported miracles from praying the simple but powerful Scripture-based prayers. In 30 Days to Taming Your

Finances, Deborah writes as a friendly boot camp sergeant and guides readers through the maze of FICO scores, credit card traps, personal spending plans, and much more. Confronting Without Offending sets forth strategies for effective confrontation of interpersonal conflicts with special strategies based upon personality temperament. Her latest book, 30 Days to Taming Your Emotions, is a consolidation of three of her most im-pactful books for taming stress, wrong attitudes, and emotional insecurity. (See "Online Store" for a listing of

other books authored by Deborah).

She has been the featured guest on numerous radio and television talk shows to discuss the life-changing prin-ciples set forth in her works. Repeat invitations as well as letters from around the world affirm the effective-

ness of her writings and teaching.

A seasoned professional and astute businesswoman, Deborah has held executive positions in several major corporations including ten years as Vice President of MCA INC. / Universal Studios' venture capital division and three years as Manager of Forecasting and Budgeting for Hughes Aircraft's billion-dollar Space & Com-munications Division. She has also served as financial consultant to several celebrities, various non-profit or-ganizations and emerging businesses domestically and in South Africa. She prepared the initial financial pro-

jections for the development of the wildly successful Magic Johnson Theater chain.

A Certified Public Accountant with a Bachelor's degree in Accounting from the University of North Texas and an MBA degree in Finance from the University of Southern California, Deborah is also a Certified Behavioral

Consultant. She specializes in helping people understand, accept, and appreciate personality differences.

Deborah served for almost nine years as Chief Financial Officer of West Angeles Church, one of the leading mega-churches in the USA, headed by Bishop Charles Blake (presiding bishop of the Church of God in Christ International). In connection with the construction of their $66-million landmark cathedral, she negotiated the

largest financing commitment ever extended to a church in the United States at that time.

She is in great demand to share her expertise on church financial management and leadership essentials. Her advice has appeared in Essence magazine, Charisma, Redbook, and other national publications. Deborah's community involvement has included serving on the Board of Directors of the Christian Entertainers Fellow-ship, Inc., an outreach organization for high profile entertainers, Save Africa's Children, Inc., Evangelical Christian Credit Union (ECCU), and special stints of sharing her wisdom with numerous other nonprofit or-ganizations. She currently serves on the Board of Directors for World Vision USA, the billion-dollar Christian

humanitarian organization that helps relieve poverty in over 100 countries.

Respected community leaders have praised Deborah for her excellence, forthrightness and integrity. She and her husband, Darnell Pegues, have been happily married for 33 years; together, they conduct marriage enrich-

ment seminars. They reside in California and have no children.

Perhaps you are asking, "Should I confront every offense?" Absolutely not! "A man's wisdom gives him patience; it is to

his glory to overlook an offense" (Proverbs 19:11 NIV).

Books

Thou Will Prosper by Rabbi Daniel Labi

Spiritual Authority, by Watchman Lee

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