The Chair Prediction The Kicks All Other Chair Predictions In

The Seat By

Lance Norris

Four chairs sit alone on the stage. On each is affixed

a number -- 1,2,3,4 -- from left to right. Just like we

read English. It is no coincidence. We are all

speaking English.

Next to the chairs sits a large drawing pad with a

bold prediction written on the top sheet. The

performer asks a spectator to come up and assist.

You show the prediction to the crowd that your

little helper can not see. It reads, “She Will Sit In

Chair Number Three”. She walk to the center of the

stage and sit in, wait for it….

Chair Number Three!

A gasp come from the crowd, as villagers gather to

burn you as a witch.

So how is it done? The same way Dunninger used

to do it. You cheat. The drawing pad is made up

into an index. Not one of those complicated, Pat

Page style index things, but let’s give him credit

anyway.

Under the blank top sheets are four pages each

stating a chair number 1 through 4. You place a tab

one each numbered page which allows you to locate

the correct prediction by touch. Put the tab for 1 on

the far left of the page, two a little into the right, but

not in the center, three further past center to the

fight and four to the far right.

You‘re going to want to make the tabs the same

color as the pad so they don‘t stick out.

Now all you have to do is divine which chair the

lady will sit in. There are two ways to do this: One)

Become a real psychic, but that could be very time

consuming, expensive and quite frankly,

impossible; or you could try an easier method,

cheat.

You ask everyone in the audience to think of one of

the numbered chairs. Really focus on it, but do not

to say anything out loud. Don’t share with your

neighbor. In fact, don’t even look at the chair

anymore.

Then you walk into the house and grab a hot chick

near the back. You ask for her for name then ask for

a round of applause for the babe, just because she

got her name right. Under the cover of the applause

you ask her, “Which number chair did you pick?”

When she tells you, (in this case Chair Three) you

say, “Yeah, most people pick that one”.

Walk her back up to the stage. As soon as you get

there you say, “Young lady, you now have a chair

number in mind. Please go sit”.

As she starts walking to the chairs you pick up your

drawing pad reveal your "prediction" by locating

the right tab for the Chair Three prediction and hold

it up for the audience. Make sure you have the

prediction pad placed well down stage and to the

side, so she doesn‘t get a chance to see what you’re

a holding. The crowd will applaud your mad skills

and she will just think they are clapping for her

beauty, the vain little beast.

Move you move onto the next phase of the routine

quick like a bunny, so she doesn’t bother to look at

your prediction. Trust me. It worked for Dunninger

for years. And you though Kenton Kreeper, Luke

Jermay and them were the guys that thought of that

duel reality junk. It’s older than the Pope’s nose, my

friend.

WHAT THE HECK DECK Phase two is an Invisible Deck trick for those of you

who can’t afford an invisible deck.

Now that your chippy is comfortable in Chair

Number Three, you ask her if she has a really good

imagination, because she is going to have to really,

really see the invisible cards if this trick is going to

work.

Hand her an invisible deck of cards and tell her deal

the deck into two separate piles, and then again, and

then again. Encourage her to really get into the

actions, a lot like a hypnotist milking the humor out

of a ‘hypnotized’ woman doing a pantomime.

You get her to eliminate cards, with no

equivocation or magician’s choice, until she is

down to just one invisible card, which only she

knows. You then hand her the drawing pad and a

marker and ask her write the name of her card down

as you turn away and walk down stage.

When she’s done, you concentrate and then

announce the name of the card, which she confirms

by turning the pad towards the audience.

The Method: Tell her she’s really got to use her

imagination and then ask her to deal the deck into

two piles, red and black. Tell her to really visualize

as she deals. When she starts to deal the cards into

red and black you will see from her actions, which

pile is red and which is black. Every time you say

’Red and Black’ you say it in that order, ’Red and

Black’. When she starts to deal, she will deal her

imaginary red cards down first.

They you tell her to pick up one of the invisible

piles. Because you know which one she visualized

at red and which one is her black, you will be able

to see which color she picked up.

So now you know what color the chosen card will

be. You then ask her to deal the cards into hearts

and diamond if she had picked up the red or clubs

and spades if she had picked up the black. This may

very well throw her for a loop because she’ll have

no idea how you knew that she picked up either the

red or black pile.

Same as before, use the same order every time,

hearts or diamonds, clubs and spades, and if she is

really visualizing she will either deal hearts or clubs

into the first pile, respectively.

Once she is done tell her to pick up one of the pack

and brush the other off the table. Again, you will

know which pile she picks up, so know you know

what suit she picked.

Now tell her to toss the King, Queen and Jack out of

her pile and deal the cards into odd and even piles.

Again, only use the order odd and even, and she’ll

follow along. Tell her to pick up one of the piles

and brush the other away and again you’ll know

now if she holds the odd or even cards in her mind.

Ask her to deal the cards in her hand face up to the

table. Human nature will cause her to deal them in

numerical order 3, 5, 7, 9 if they are odd. It’s an

odds on bet that she won’t think of the Ace, but if

she does, you’ll know because she’ll deal down five

cards.

Now tell her to brush away the card from each end

and choose from the cards in front of her. Just

watch which invisible card she picks up. If it’ the

one on her left, it’s the 3 (working with the odd

cards. 4 if she’s working with the even). If she takes

the invisible card from the middle, it’s the 5 (or 6)

and if she takes it from the far right, it’s the 7 (or 8).

Ask her to write the name of her card down as you

walk away and it’s all over but the crying.

BAR BET TIME

How to cut an orange with a cigarette You bet the sap sitting next to you that you can cut

and orange without using a knife, but a cigarette.

Because of a life long fear of scurvy, of course, you

never travel without at least on orange on you at all

times. In case you don’t share this fear, it will also

work with a lemon that you get from the bartender.

Once you get them to take the bet, take the filter tip

off the cigarette. Hold it over the flame from your

lighter. After a couple of seconds, remove it from

the flame and press it flat with your thumb and

index fingers. Don’t use a thumb tip, that’s a

different trick.

The slightly melted filter tip will turn hard as it

cool, only a matter of seconds. Now you can easily

cut the orange or lemon or your wrist with this

impromptu knife, you friggin MacGyver, you.

CANADIAN BAKING (A Two Person Code For The Fried)

Perhaps you are familiar with my penultimate work

on the two person code, Code and Flu Season? If

not, get it soon. It is going fast.

While Code and Flu is dirt simple to learn, some of

you might still have problems with it (and you

know who you are) so here’s what’s gotta be the

easiest two person code ever. I think I first learned

it from an episode of Scooby Doo, or maybe

Gilligan’s Island. Or maybe it was that episode

where the Mystery Inc. gang went to Gilligan’s

Island, or did I just dream that? Anyways, I had to

resort to using it once when I was working with a

Canadian. Hey, we all have our crosses to bare.

Just scotch tape the end of some invisible thread to

the dolt you’re working with’s ear. It doesn’t even

need to be one of those expensive thread reel evil

internet magic shops will sell you for a 800% mark-

up. Just go to the fabric store and ask for a spool of

invisible thread. I think it cost less that three bucks.

You hold the other end of the thread and you

literally have a direct line to your partner, One

gentle tug and you send a clear message to your

partner. You’re attaching the thread to his ear,

because the human ear is very sensitive and a tug on

the ear is very noticeable.

If you use enough thread, you partner can even

leave the room and you can still pass messages to

them with a simple system of tugs. Come up with

your own system that works for you, but one idea is

tug once for the item on the left, twice for the item

in the middle and thrice for the item on right. Thrice

is how poets say three times.

So if you have three items on the table and your

partner leaves the room, you can still tell him which

item was selected by the sap you are working.

Of course, I realize that this is a pretty lame system,

but it works in a pitch. My suggestion is just go out

and find yourself a smarter partner and use my

really simple Code and Flu Season system.

Vu Do You Love Two?

Further thoughts on the trick I tried to get David

Blaine to buy, but he refused to touch the bar of

soap required. I told him he could also do it with

wax, but he was already too scared.

Effect: A name of a person they secretly lust after is

written on a piece of paper on a notepad by the

spectator, the paper is torn off unseen by the

magician, crumpled up and placed in an ashtray. It

is then set on fire. The ashes are then rubbed on the

magicians arm and the name of the person written

on the paper mysteriously appears.

Preparation : You will need a small notepad, pen,

ashtray, lighter, gasoline, a rag and a small piece of

soap or, yes David, wax.

Method: The spectator is asked to write the name

of a person they have a crush on down on a notepad.

Then they’re told tear of the sheet of notepaper,

crumple it up and place it in the ashtray, where you

then sets the paper ablaze. Because you rubbed the

inside of the ash tray with a gasoline soaked rag

earlier in the day, the paper will create a large ball

of fire that will give you just the misdirection you

will need to pull this off.

Take the notepad off the spectator as they battle the

flame and you should be able to see the imprint of

the name written on the paper above in the next

sheet of the notepad.

If you can’t make it out, there’s an old Columbo

trick where you rub a pencil on the second sheet and

the imprint should be visable, but you may not have

enough cover time to pull this off. Also, the looking

at the pad should not be made obvious. If the light is

good, it should only take a quick glance.

Then carefully take the small piece of wax or soap

and write the name on the imprint on your inner arm

( this action should not be visible to anyone ).

Once the fire is contained, you can then take some

ash from the ashtray and rub it over the wax where

it will stick and create an impression of the

spectators word to their amazement.

You may also burn down the bar, so please, don’t

use too much gasoline!

You can also pull this off without the fire by writing

the name of a playing card on your inner arm with

soap earlier in the night. Forcing that same card on

the sap. Giving them a pencil and telling them to

write the name of their card down.

Take the pencil back and tell they you are going to

shave the name of their card off the pencil. Stick the

pencil in a pencil sharpener and twist away.

Take some of the wood and lead shavings and rub

them over the soap/wax and reveal the card’s name.

Sugar and salt don’t work too well, but Sweet &

Low or pepper could be used in a pinch. You can

also use coffee grounds if you don’t mind walking

around smelling like Juan Valdez all day.

CASEY AT THE BAT

The big story in the news the other day, once you

got past all the who-struck-Johnny over Katrina,

was that a paparazzo was arrested for hiding on the

set of the movie THE ASSASSINATION OF

JESSE JAMES BY THE COWARD ROBERT

FORD in order to get a picture of one of the stars,

Brad Pitt.

This story begs two questions: do we really need

more pictures of Brad Pitt and do we really need a

western staring Casey Affleck?

I guess it’s rare to find a photo op of Pitt without

Angelina Jolie and her accessory kids, but who need

a new Casey Affleck movie, western or otherwise?

The key word being “new”, when Casey has such a

rich history to re-explore (and if Hollywood does

anything well, it is re-exploring)

Honestly, shouldn’t Ben’s little brother be

working on SOUL SURVIVORS II or

DROWNING MONA AGAIN? The least he could

do is dust off the tights one more time and treat us

to HAMLET RELOADED: THIS TIME IT’S

PERSONAL.

Or couldn’t he pick up pen again and write. Who

didn’t love GERRY? Unfortunately it seems an

Affleck family trait is to set the world ablaze with

your mad screen-playerism and then walk away.

Brother Ben did it after winning the Oscar for his

debut, GOOD WILL HUNTING, why shouldn’t

Casey?

The Affleck’s are the pride of Massachusetts,

because outside of the sports world, we have very

little to be proud about on a national level, but

Casey would do well to remind himself that he’s not

the only actor to be born in Falmouth, MA. The

great Gretel Twombly also hails from the bunghole

of Cape Cod. Perhaps you remember her as The

Fluffer in the Farrelly Brother’s STUCK ON YOU.

Sadly, she gave up acting for the bright lights of

production coordinating. Maybe Casey might do the

same while we‘re still proud.

I don’t mean to be too cruel to Casey Affleck, but

it dovetails nicely into my real point. Casey’s (and

Ben’s) long time companion, Matt Damon has

turned up in the Terry Gilliam film THE

BROTHER’S GRIMM. I love Terry Gilliam and

hate Damon; needless to say, I was excited on so

many levels to see this movie. How often do you

get to stride that thin line between love and hate in

one film?

Just as I was warming up to rip into Damon and

his high school drama department English accent, I

went and read this quote:

“I sort of took my career and destroyed it. I had

to destroy my career because I just didn't like it. I

didn't like the movies I was making. People weren't

giving me a chance to do anything other than be the

blond-haired bimbo, and it was starting to bore me.

I couldn't have spent the rest of my life following the

paths that were being presented to me, so I had to

start creating some for myself. It's taken a while,

but it looks like doors are opening again.”

Sadly, that didn’t come from the Oscar winning

pen of Matt Damon. It was his co-star, Heath

Ledger, talking, and God forbid Heath Ledger

should grow bored!

I still haven’t figured out if THE BROTHERS

GRIMM was part of his destroying his career or his

attempt at rebirth. Ledger brings very little to the

table, other than aping some moves he learned off a

Johnny Depp retrospective. The movie itself has

problems, but I don’t want to get into that here. I

want to mock Ledger.

To look at his massive folio of work, you would

have to guess that 10 THINGS I HATE ABOUT

YOU was the movie where Heath started getting

type cast as ‘the blond-haired bimbo’. It would have

to be, since he had only done Australian TV and

Indy films before that. He followed that up with

THE PATRIOT, and, I though, did a fine job.

Next came A KNIGHT’S TALE, the movie that

launched the whole David Manning debacle.

Remember that one? Sony-TriStar does. They had

to pay out a 1.5 million dollar settlement because

the made up a film critic, David Manning, so that he

could fawn over sub-par pictures in commercials.

They really didn’t need to, as there are plenty of

movie critics that will fall all over themselves to say

something nice just so their blurb gets attached to a

movie poster or newspaper ad. Apparently Sony

could find anyone to say anything nice about A

KNIGHT’S TALE, so Manning swing into action.

As a matter of fact, David Manning was so taken

with Heath he declared the Aussie "this year's

hottest new star".

The hot new star went on to have a small role in

MONSTERS BALL, but far more important parts in

FOUR FEATHERS, NED KELLEY, THE ORDER,

and CANDY. It’s good for his fans to know that he

only took those part to ruin his career and he’s sorry

for any money you may have lost buying tickets or

renting the DVDs. He was back to playing the

himbo in LORDS OF DOGTOWN, and then there’s

THE BROTHERS GRIMM.

Like the Phoenix, however, Heath Ledger will rise

from the ashes of this mockery of a shame with his

new movie, THE BROKEBACK MOUNTAIN,

about (I’m guessing from the trailer) a couple of

gay cowboys. Playing gay is nothing new for

Ledger. He played a gay bike rider on an Australian

TV show before he became a star. He did, however,

shy away from playing the gay Alexander the Great

in Oliver Stone’s folly.

I’m guessing that it was then girlfriend Naomi

Watts that walked Heath into taking THE

BROKEBACK MOUNTAIN, and the risk of

playing a gay lead character. The question is, did

she want him to stretch as an actor, or was this her

pay back for all the times he cheated on her with

Scarlett Johansson and all the times he got her little

pet doggy, Bob, stoned. I vaguely remember that a

couple years ago they had to rush the dog to a pet

hospital in Vancouver because the pooch was too

stoned to stand-up.

Anyhow, I’m guessing she talked him to taking

the role as payback. Ang Lee is directing

BROKEBACK MOUNTAIN. This is right in Ang’s

wheelhouse, after all he is the guy that turned the

Hulk into a fag on the big screen. But the word on

the set is that Heath go so ‘in to’ one of his kissing

scenes with co-star Jake Gyllenhaal, things go so

hot and heavy, he broke Jake’s nose. Talk about

tough love.

Speaking of gossip: the word is things got so ugly

during filming that writer/producer Larry McMurtry

was banned from the set and film editor Geraldine

Peroni (who did a lot of Robert Altman’s films so

she is no stranger to difficult shoots) killed herself

rather than begin cutting the movie.

It could be the Curse of Heath Ledger. Ted

Demme had a cocaine-fueled heart attack while

playing basketball, as he was getting ready to direct

Heath and Ewan McGregor in NAUTICA. The

movie will now be directed by the guy that did

LOST IN SPACE and if Heath stays attached to the

film I’m sure it will be added to his ‘I was ruining

my career on purpose’ pile.

At least, unlike Brad Pitt, when Heath is

confronted by the paparazzi he takes matter into his

own hands. He claims to pelt the photogs with eggs

whenever they get too close. Of course, I’m not

buying it because that would be assault, and

paparazzi is going to walk away from the Tabloid

equivalent to an Oscar; a large out of court cash

settlement from a movie star gone wild?

If it is true, the paparazzi had the last laugh. See,

there is a nude scene in BROKEBACK

MOUNTAIN where Heath has to jump in a lake,

but Ang will edit out all the frontal shots from the

finished film. Of course if you do a quick Google

search you’ll find plenty of shot snapped by the

press from a safe, egg throwing proof distance.