71% of school shooters had been victims of bullying.

Bullyingis the deliberate, repeatedharm or threat of harm

by the same studentor group of students

against a relatively defenseless student or staff member.

Two types of Acquaintance ViolenceTwo types of Acquaintance Violence

Violence stemming from Normal Conflict, which involves:

disagreements, misunderstandings

Bully/ Victim violence, which involves:

two or more students who are equally matched

lack of conflict resolution skills

lack of anger management skills

series of negative actions repeated over time

students who are unequally matchedbullies - lack of connectedness and sensitivity

victims - lack of assertiveness skills

when someone with greater power unfairly hurts someone with less power over and over again.

Physical Power

•size•hitting•pushing•stealing•defacing/destroying property•threatening with aweapon

Verbal Power

•threats•insults•name-calling•teasing•making fun of another•intimidatingphone calls

Social Power

•humiliating•excluding•hurting feelings•playing mean tricks•put-downs •gossip/rumors

BULLYING HAPPENS…

CyberbullyingCyberbullying

Text MessagesText Messages FacebookFacebook Web PagesWeb Pages SextingSexting

Follower/Henchman

Takes an active part, but does not start the bullying

SupporterSupports the bullying but does not take an active part

Passive Supporter(Possible Bully)

Likes the bullying but does not display open support

Disengaged Onlooker

Possible Defender

Dislikes the bullying and thinks he ought to help but doesn’t

Defender of the Victim

Dislikes the bullying and helps or tries to help the victim

BullyStarts the bullying and takes an active part

20%Bully

80% Bystander

Characteristic of BullyCharacteristic of Bully

High self-esteemHigh self-esteem May be popularMay be popular More likely to engage in other

problem behaviors later in life, such as criminal activity or alcohol or other drug abuse

High self-esteemHigh self-esteem May be popularMay be popular More likely to engage in other

problem behaviors later in life, such as criminal activity or alcohol or other drug abuse

VictimsVictims

Quiet, anxious & insecureQuiet, anxious & insecure Tend to “normalize” and no longer are

victims upon entering adulthood, though they may have continued lower self-esteem and be more prone to depression

Quiet, anxious & insecureQuiet, anxious & insecure Tend to “normalize” and no longer are

victims upon entering adulthood, though they may have continued lower self-esteem and be more prone to depression

PassivePassive

ProvocativeProvocative Reactive, clumsy, impulsive, irritatingReactive, clumsy, impulsive, irritating Attempt to fight or answer back when

attacked, but not effectively Often hyperactive, have difficulty

concentrating and act in ways that irritate others

Reactive, clumsy, impulsive, irritatingReactive, clumsy, impulsive, irritating Attempt to fight or answer back when

attacked, but not effectively Often hyperactive, have difficulty

concentrating and act in ways that irritate others

Typical Responses to Typical Responses to BullyingBullying

Enabling Enabling is unwittingly protecting a person from the consequences of their actions out of a sense of love, compassion, fear, or survival instinct

EntitlementEntitlementis the belief that it is our right to use violence or threats of violence to express feelings, meet needs, or satisfy wants.

occurs when violence is accepted as the norm by adults or young people who ignore, rationalize, or minimize incidents of violence.

Tolerance Tolerance

DifferentiationDifferentiation

Is it bullying?Is it bullying?Is it teasing?Is it teasing? How is the action received How is the action received by the recipient? Is the by the recipient? Is the recipient too fragile to ask recipient too fragile to ask the aggressor to stop?the aggressor to stop?

DifferentiationDifferentiation

Tattling/Snitching:Tattling/Snitching:

Are you trying to get someone in Are you trying to get someone in trouble?trouble?

Reporting:Reporting:

Are you trying to keep Are you trying to keep

someone from someone from

getting hurt?getting hurt?

DifferentiationDifferentiation

BullyingBullying Power differential, Power differential,

repeated, not friendsrepeated, not friends

HorseplayHorseplay Rough play, usually friends, equal powerRough play, usually friends, equal power

FightingFighting Usually a singular event, equal power, not Usually a singular event, equal power, not

friendsfriends

StereotypingNon-inclusive language

Insensitive Remarks Belittling Jokes

Bullying Ridicule

Slurs/Epithets

Name Calling

Social Avoidance De-humanization

Bullying Sticks With YouBullying Sticks With You

State law prohibits bullying, which it defines as an act which occurs on school property, on school vehicles, at designated bus stops, or at school-related functions or activities, or by use of data or software that is accessed through a computer, computer system, computer network, or other electronic technology of a local school system, that is:

(1) Any willful attempt or threat to inflict injury on another person, when accompanied by an apparent present ability to do so;

(2) Any intentional display of force such as would give the victim reason to fear or expect immediate bodily harm; or

(3) Any intentional written, verbal, or physical act, which a reasonable person would perceive as being intended to threaten, harass, or intimidate, that:

(A) Causes another person substantial physical harm . . . or visible bodily harm

(B) Has the effect of substantially interfering with a student’s education;

(C) Is so severe, persistent, or pervasive that it creates an intimidating or threatening educational environment;

(D) Has the effect of substantially disrupting the orderly operation of the school.

DCSS Bullying Policy

How SHOULD bullying behavior be How SHOULD bullying behavior be addressed in DeKalb County addressed in DeKalb County

Schools?Schools?

•Creating Positive School Climate

•Educating Staff to Identify Bullying Behavior

•Educating Students on Bullying Behavior

•Educating Parents on Bullying Behavior

•Mobilize the Caring Majority

How SHOULD bullying behavior be How SHOULD bullying behavior be addressed in DeKalb County addressed in DeKalb County

Schools?Schools?

All reports of bullying received by school personnel should be immediately reported to the school principal.

Bullying reports are to be thoroughly investigated in a timely manner.

Parents/Guardians of ALL parties are to be notified at the appropriate time.

Confirmed acts of bullying should be handled in a timely and age-appropriate manner, which may include some disciplinary action and/or counseling. Students in grades six through twelve found to have committed the offense of bullying for the third time in a school year shall be assigned to an alternative school.

Clearly communicate to all parties that retaliation following a report of bullying is strictly prohibited and may result in strong penalties.

Take care of the needs of the accused and victim through a planned method of after-care and follow-up. Reiterate to all the previously stated prohibition on retaliation.

Encourage friendships.

Teach your children to express themselves clearly yet tactfully.

Stress the importance of body language.

Start teaching the art of conflict resolution early.

Help your child be self-confident. Help your child practice what to say to the bullies so he or she will be prepared the next time. Teach your child to respond effectively. However, some bullies feed on responses, so your child should assert himself just once.

What can parents do to help bully-proof their children?

Don't encourage your child to fight the bully.

Tell your child it is not her fault and that s/he did the right thing by telling you.

Ask your child what s/he thinks should be done. What has she tried? What worked and what didn't? Make it clear that she should never be ashamed to ask for help.

Encourage your child to report the bullying to teachers, guidance counselors, or other responsible adults.

Teach your child to avoid situations when necessary.

Make sure your child isn't witnessing violence between members of your family. Modeling aggressive behavior at home can lead to violence by the child against others at school and later on in life.

Talk to your child, his teachers and school administrators. Children who bully try to deny or minimize their wrongdoings. Cooperate with the school to help change your child's aggressive behavior.

Make it clear that bullying will not be tolerated. Tell your child you will not allow such actions, and state the consequences. If the problem occurs at school, tell him that you respect the school's right to punish him/her if it persists.

What can we do to help our child if he bullies others?

Have your child walk in the victim's shoes. Discuss how it feels to be bullied. How would he feel if it happened to him?

Increase your supervision of your child's activities and whereabouts. Find out who he's associating with. Spend time with him and set reasonable rules for and limits on activities.

Praise (lots of it!) the efforts your child makes toward becoming non-violent and responsible.

Children See Children DOChildren See Children DO