7 Habits of Effective People - Copy

Seven Habits of Highly Effective People

By: DR. Stephen Covey

1. To feel an inner relief and comfort in yourself

2. To have a balanced social relations with those around you

3. To have a great achievement

Personality and character Ethics

20%

80%

Personality

Character

What is seen from you

What you really areYour inside

Personality:Say

Do

Skills & techniques

Public

Lubricate the process

Of human interaction

20%

Personality and character Ethics

Integrity

Fidelity

Humility

Patience

Justice

Modesty, simplicity

Courage, temperance

80%

Character:

Integrity Fidelity

Humility

Patience

Justice

Modesty, simplicity

Courage, temperance

80%

Character:

نية المؤمن خير من عمله

عمل المنافق خير من نيته

سريرته أصلح منعالنيته , الله أصلح

نفسه بين و بينه ما أصلح من والناس بين و بينه ما الله أصلح

Foundational Principles

Developing Habits

"Sow a thought, reap an action; sow an action,

reap a habit; sow a habit, reap a character; sow a

character, reap a destiny,"

Components to develop a habit

Character and competency

“; ; ولن تجد لسنة الله تحويال “ولن تجد لسنة الله تبديال

P/BC Balance

Paradigm

It is the lens through which we see the

world

It is our POINT-OF-VIEW

(the closer the clearer, the higher the bigger)

YOU

Paradigm lens

We think we see the world as it isNO

We see the world as we were conditioned to see it

The power of the paradigm

CHANGE MODEL

SEE

THINKDO

VALUES

PRINCIPLES

Paradigm Shift

SEE

THINKDO

VALUES

PRINCIPLES

إنهم يرونه بعيدا; و نراه قريبا;الرحيم الرحمن الله بسم

العظيم الله صدق

الموت قرب رؤية

الموت ذكرالموت بعد لما العمل

Dependence

Public Victory

Private Victory

Independence

Interdependence

Be proactive1

Begin with end in mind

2

Put 1st things 1st 3

Think Win/Win4

Seek 1st to Understand..

5 Synergize6

SharpenThe saw

7

Seven Habits Paradigm

Maturity Continuum

It is the outline of the (Seven habits of highly effective people)

Dependence

Independence

Interdependence

YOU

I

WE

“EMOTIONAL MATURITY IS NOT TIED WITH AGE”

Habit One Be Proactive

� مبادرا كن

Habit One: Be Proactive

- We have 3 types of determinism:• GeneticGenetic:: What your ancestors did to you.• PsychicPsychic:: What your parents did to you.• EnvironmentalEnvironmental:: Situations and people around you.

Pavlov Theory:

This is This is okok for for

AnimalsAnimals

not humans!!!not humans!!!

”أولئك كاألنعام بل هم أضل“الرحيم الرحمن الله بسم


Habit One: Be Proactive (Contd.)

• As a human you always have the freedom to choose.

• Morals and behaviors are not inherited.

Stimulus ResponseFreedom to

choose

Self Awareness

Self Imagination Self Conscious

Independent Will

Proactive Model


Genetic Psychic Environ.

Freedom to choose

Different response

Be a Transitional Figure



( يعنيه ال ما تركه المرء إسالم حسن (من

• All the problems we face can be:

– Direct Control: yourself

– Indirect Control: others

– No Control: weather- natural catastrophes

• Believe this: You always have the 1st key for

solving the problem


Response-Ability

Reactive people are often affected by their physical

environment. If the weather is good, they feel good. If it isn't, it affects their attitude and their

performance. Proactive people can carry their own weather with them.

Reactive people are affected by their social environment, by the "social weather." When people

treat them well, they feel well; when people don't, they become defensive or protective. Reactive

people build their emotional lives around the behavior of others, empowering the weaknesses of other

people to control them.

• Conclusions:– You are the programmer of your life.

– Do not live to eat and have pleasure or you do not deserve to be a human.

– Work on your Circle of Influence.

• Ghandi: They cannot take our self respect unless we give it to them.


• Reactive Persons

– There is nothing I can do

– That’s just the way I’m

– He makes me so mad

– They won’t allow that

– I can’t– I must– If only

• Proactive Persons

– Let’s look at other alternatives

– I can choose a different approach

– I control my own feelings

– I will choose an appropriate response

– I choose– I prefer– I will


Listen to your language

Making and Keeping Commitments

At the very heart of our Circle of Influence is our ability to make and keep commitments and

promises. The commitments we make to ourselves and to others, and our integrity to those

commitments, is the essence and clearest manifestation of our proactivity.

( أخلف (............... وعد وإذا ثالث المنافق آية

It is here that we find two ways to put ourselves in control of our lives immediately. We can make

a promise -- and keep it. Or we can set a goal -- and work to achieve it. As we make and keep

commitments, even small commitments, we begin to establish an inner integrity that gives us the

awareness of self-control and the courage and strength to accept more of the responsibility for our own

lives. By making and keeping promises to ourselves and others, little by little, our honor becomes

greater than our moods.

Setting Goals and Achieving them

يتقنه أن عمال أحدكم عمل إذا يحب الله إن

Habit Two Begin with the end in

mind

Habit Two: Begin with the end in mind

• Habit One: You are the programmer of your life

• Habit Two: Program your life– Mental creation precedes physical creation

– Use self Imagination

• What is your end in mind?– To decide this you need to know the center of your paradigm

Begin with The End in MindSet your Vision

Work

Money

SpouseFamily

Possessi

on

Friends

Pleasu

re

SelfWhat is your CENTER?! What most makes You happy? What most Irritates you?


PRINCIPLES

Family Money

Possession

Pleasure

Friend

Self

Spouse

Work

Principles – Centered Paradigm


“إعلموا إنما الحيوة الدنيا لعب و لهو و زينة و تفاخر بينكم و تكاثر فى األموال و األوالد”الرحيم الرحمن الله بسم


All Things Are Created Twice

"Begin with the End in Mind" is based on the principle that all things are created twice. There's a mental or first creation, and a physical or second

creation to all things

What are the steps we take to build a

house?

Leadership and Management -- The Two Creations

Management is a bottom-line focus: How can I best accomplish certain things? Leadership deals with the top line: What are the things I want to accomplish?

In the words of both Peter Drucker and Warren Bennis, "Management is doing things right; leadership is doing the right things."

Writing and Using a A Personal Mission Statement

1. Take the time to record the impressions you had in the funeral

visualization at the beginning of this chapter..

2. Take a few moments and write down your roles as you now see them. Are you satisfied with that mirror image of your

life.

3. Set up time to completely separate yourself from daily activities and to

begin work on your personal mission statement.

• Conclusions:– Know yourself, know your center

– Try to have a principles-centered paradigm

– Program your life: Mission Statement


Habit Three: Put first Things First

المهم على األهم وتقديم الوقت إدارة


• Habit One: You are the programmer

• Habit Two: Program your life – Use: Self Imagination

• Habit Three: Do the program, live the program– Use: Independent Will

Put first things first

• What we are able to do is much more that we actually do.

• Awaken your sleeping tiger. Give it a twist in the tail.

• Things that matter most should never be under the mercy of things that matter least.



Put first things first

تطيقون، ) ما األعمال من خذوا الناس يأيهاأحب وإن تملوا، حتى يمل ال تعالى الله فإن

قل وإن دام ما الله إلى ومسلم (األعمال البخاري

Put first things firstTime Management

• Conclusions:

– Live your program but put first things first.

– Schedule your properties but do not prioritize your

schedule.

– Give your sleeping tiger a twist in the tail.

– What you are able to do is much more that you

actually do.


Private Victory

• Working on the 80%: character, paradigm

• Private victory precedes public victory.

• Without private victory

Chronic Pains: from inside

Acute pains: from others

80%

Paradigm Shift

PRINCIPLESCENTEREDPARADIGM

Emotional BankEmotional Bank

It is a metaphor that describes the

amount of TRUST that has

been built up in a relationship.

Emotional BankEmotional Bank

Any Say or Do in a relationship can be:

DEPOSIT(+)WITHDRAWEL(-)

+100-300

+500-200

+600-700

=1100=1200

Emotional Bank: Six Main Deposits

• Understanding People

– man/women, children, different centers.

• Attending to little things:

– Little things are the big things

• Keeping Commitments

Emotional Bank: Six Main Deposits

• Clarifying expectations– ALLAH, marriage

• Showing personal integrity– Union of personality and character

• Apologizing sincerely when you make a withdrawal– This never hurts your dignity.

Habit Four Think Win/Win

Habit Four: Think Win/Win

It is the habit of the 3rd alternative:

It is not my way, it is not your way, it is a

better way

• Different interactive paradigms:

– Win/Win

– Lose/Win• Psychomosotic

– Win/Lose• selfish

• Win• I win, no matter

the other end.

– Lose/Lose• Devil


• Character:

– Integrity:

• Union between character and personality

– Maturity:

• Courage to express your opinion and respect and

appreciate the others’

– Abundance Mentality:

• There is always room for everyone

• Opposite to scarcity mentality: selfishness

Dimensions of the Win/Win Approach


Con

side

rati

on

Courage

Lose/Win

Win/LoseLose/Lose

Win/Win


• Relationships:Relationships:

– Based on emotional bank

– Aware of the account

– Many withdrawals less trust no win/win

• Agreements:Agreements:

– Agree on: targets, plans, methods, consequences,

good or bad

• Systems and processes:Systems and processes: Gods’ system

Dimensions of the Win/Win Approach (Contd.)


• Conclusions:

– It is not my way, it is not your way, it is a better

way.

– Win/Win means courage and consideration

– Integrity, maturity, abundance mentality

– There is always room for everyone

– Be aware of your emotional bank accounts


Habit Five: Seek first to understand then to be understood

Habit Five: Seek first to understand.…

• We were taught how to talk, walk, write but to

listen….????

• You are 100% responsible for communication with

the others whether you are sending or receiving .

Most people either speak or prepare to speak or listen to judge and criticize.

COLLECTIVE MONOLOGUE

(THE DIALOGUE OF DEATH!!!)

Habit Five: Seek first to understand….


• Listening:

– 7%: words

– 38%: vocals

– 55%: non-verbal

• impressions

• Eye looks (100%

expressing)

7%

38%

55%

• Levels of listening:– Ignorive– Pretentive: nodding and humming– Selective– Attentive: focus on the words– Empathic:

• Listens to understand

• Gets what behind the words



• BECAUSE WE LISTEN THROUGH OUR OWN PARADIGM WE TEND TO:

-Probe

- Evaluate

- Interpret

- Advice


Levels of misunderstanding:

1. Appearance: age, gender, language, clothing

2. Association: work, education, home, club

3. Interests: hobbies, friends

4. Thoughts

5. Values and believes: paradigm


You can never understand a

person if you listen to him

through your paradigm. You

have to put yourself in his

shoes.

12345

?

20%

80%

Habit Five: ….then to be understood

• To be understood:

– Ethos (70%):

• From ethics: principles-centered character

– Pathos (20%):

• From passion: express your emotions

– Logos (10%):

• From logic: make sense


• Conclusions:

– Empathic listening is the essence of human

communication.

– If you do your best to understand people, indeed they

will understand you.

– Do not jump to conclusions

– More understanding more trust more influence

Habit Six:

Synergize

Habit Six: Synergize

• The essence of synergy is to:– Value differences

– Respect others

– Build on strength

– Compromise for weakness

• Real strength is based on difference not on similarity

“This is a natural law”


Human Brain

Left Hemisphere

Right Hemisphere

• Verbal (logic)• Time bound•Management

• Non-Verbal (emotions)• Time free• Leadership


LEVELS OF COMMUNICATION

COOPERATION

TR

US

T

Defensive (Win/Lose or Lose/Lose)

Respectful (Compromise)

Synergize(Win/Win)

DRIVING VS RESTRAINING FORCE

• Driving Force:- Positive- Reasonable- Logical- Conscious

• Restraining Force:- Negative- Emotional- Illogical- unconscious

Habit Seven Sharpen Your Saw

Habit seven: Sharpen your saw

• Sharpen the saw: the story

• It is all about:

– Self-renewal

– Important not urgent

– P/PC balance


RENEWALSocial/Emotional

Synergy, empathyFamily activities,Social activities

Spiritual Religious activities,

Prayers

Physical Exercise, nutritionStress management

Mental Reading,Planning,

Visualizing

BALANCE Effectiveness


Learn

Do Commit

Learn

CommitDoLearn

CommitDo

LearnCommitDO

The Upward Spiral

Finally

• The seven habits is all about paradigm shift.The seven habits is all about paradigm shift.

• This is not easy. You need:This is not easy. You need:

– PatiencePatience

– CourageCourage

– WillWill

– ConsistencyConsistency

FinallyFinally

• This is the way for a proper life, so do not ever This is the way for a proper life, so do not ever give up.give up.

• It is really worth some effort and pain.It is really worth some effort and pain.

Please AnswerPlease Answer

- What most affected you in this course?- What most affected you in this course?

- What did you most benefit from this course?- What did you most benefit from this course?

Real Thanks for

your Attention

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7 Habits of Effective People - Copy