My daughter made me 2

Talent Solutions. Delivered. My Daughter Made MeFive Insights That Transformed My Life

Harry GriendlingFounder and CEO

DoubleStar, Inc.

June, 2011

This information is confidential and proprietary to DoubleStar, Inc. Reproduction, disclosure or distribution without consent is prohibited. 2

Intro to DoubleStar

First, most experienced, and largest consulting firm focused on delivering talent strategy, project recruitment, RPO, and workforce analytics solutions on the East Coast

Only firm that has applied and sustained a true consultative delivery model for recruitment services for 18 years

Six-time Philly 100 Company in first 10 years Two-time INC 500 Company in first 6 years Inaugural member of the Philadelphia Business Journal Hall of Fame 100% self-funded out of operating margin 100% debt-free 100% investor-free Executed over 700 high-volume recruiting and RPO assignments for

over 300 clients Repeat business rate of 94% and a client satisfaction rate of 99%

My 6 year-old daughter made me do this


1993: A Three Alarm Fire in My Life…

My 6 year-old Daughter (Kelly) moved to Atlanta with her mom

As a result, I was close to personal bankruptcy

I had my dream job and I hated it


The Price of Long-Distance Parenting (pre-Internet)

3 round-trip plane tickets per month ($600-$900/month, plus hotel, rental car, meals, fun money)

2-4 days off per month on a fixed schedule

Flexible time off (sometimes unplanned)

No ready answers to the hard question--- how to have a real, meaningful parental relationship with a child who was 680 miles away?


My Dream Job was Becoming a Nightmare

Intellectually unfulfilled

Role and people were sucking the life juice out of me

Realized I didn’t like the path I had chosen

Job was working against me--made seeing Kelly harder, not easier

Might be a good time to re-assess things….


Needs Analysis – Non-Negotiable Requirements

4-5 consecutive days off each month

Extra time off at holidays

Four weeks of vacation annually

Ability to leave on little notice if needed

$15,000 in additional annual to stop my financial bleeding from day-to-day expenses

At least $30,000 in additional annual income just to fund trips

$20,000 in additional annual income to fund current private school and future college trust

Where Oh Where Do You Find this Job?


Solution—Start a Company! Really? You Serious?

Only solution that answered all needs

But there were a few small problems--– Had no cash– Didn’t know what I wanted to do– No experience; worse, never took a single business course– What could I do that people would pay me a premium for?– It was a counter-intuitive course of action– I would be risking everything– I would go deeper in debt with no guaranteed benefit– “I can’t” mindset. What if I fail? Is there a Plan B?– No time/patience/experience to write a business plan

Killer Revelation: A Paying Customer Solves a Lot of Problems


10 Steps to Launch My Business in 30 Days

Created a presentation about my non-existent business’ service and solutions

Created a low pricing/high delivery model to instantly differentiate it

Offered a 100% guarantee (unheard of in recruiting) to mitigate client risk of hiring me

Found 5 potential buyers to present it to

Skipped lunch to schedule and attend sales appointments

Sold my first client while still employed

Quit my job on the ‘strength’ of a six-month contract

Took a $6,000 advance on my credit card and got deeper in debt

Bought a $35/mo address in Great Valley and set up my business in my spare bedroom

Decided that desperate men do desperate things, and I’d better get desperate fast


First Insight: Change Mindset and Get Wildly Out of Balance

Being successful at anything requires commitment. Real commitment. Have to go ‘all in’

No one ever achieved anything great without getting wildly out of balance

Failure is less likely when you know that it’s simply not a option

Move from problem obsession to solution obsession-- the only thing you can hope to control is tomorrow, but you can’t even start to do that if you focus on what’s behind you

Forget the things that you THINK are in your way—they aren’t

Having the WILL to do something is more important than money, experience, or knowledge…or anyone’s permission

Move Mental Frame from “I can’t” ------“I will” ------ “I MUST”


First Insight: Change Mindset and Get Wildly Out of Balance…

What Real Commitment (“I MUST”)Looks Like

Personal Commitment Business Commitment

No excuses for failing to execute any aspect of the Kelly plan

Words always match my actions Ready to accept huge personal

inconveniences Showing up for important events that

other parents skipped…shock others with my effort

Staying in discipline: Travel + Phone Calls + Letters + Surprises +++

Read everything I can about parenting from afar

Losing sleep to create great outcomes I must be the best dad I can be—no

excuses

No excuses for failing to keep commitments to clients and employees

My words always match my actions Being available to clients on

vacations, nights, weekends Showing up for meetings in snow

storms when their own employees didn’t…shock effect

Stay in discipline: No short cuts; no quality defects; use best practices

Read everything I can to become expert in my space

Losing sleep to create great outcomes I must be the best consultant I can be

—no excuses


Funny Thing Happened…Solution Convergence

The problems became intertwined; solutions were interconnected

Personal Solution Orientation Business Solution Orientation

Build solutions that increase the value I add to Kelly’s life

Kelly comes first; all decisions filtered though ‘best for her’; I am second to irrelevant

All energy focused on gaining time and increasing quality of time

Make everything memorable... unforgettable is even better

Remove obstacles to focus time on achieving these goals

All energy focused on gaining clients and delivery quality services

Clients needs and what is best for them comes first; my needs are second

Build solutions that improve the quality of a client’s work life

Be memorable… irreplaceable is even better

Remove obstacles to achieving these goals asap


Second Insight: Focus on the Outcome, Not the Journey

If the outcome is worthwhile, the journey is easy, no matter how challenging it may become

Personal Outcomes Business Outcomes

See Kelly frequently & on my terms

Be a parent who makes a positive impact in her life

Relieve financial pressure on me

Make money an irrelevant factor in her life

Leave her with a legacy to help her launch her life well

Build long-term, meaningful relationships with clients

Be and be known as the best at what I do

Build a company that enables personal happiness and wealth enhancement for everyone (the company I couldn’t find)

Work with people I like Retire Early

Whenever you get tired or get frustrated, refer to these lists


Third Insight: Avoid the Stuff that Sucks

Don’t copy any stupid thing you’ve seen other people do

Parental Things that Suck Business Things that Suck

Hitting/Physical Punishment Secrets About the Wrong Things Deadbeat Dads/Moms Fighting Over Money Too Much/Too Little Oversight Punishments Not Fitting the Crime Failing to Model Desired Behaviors Monologue/Lectures Not Dialogue Unclear Rules and Boundaries Atmosphere of Fear Badmouthing the Ex No Fun

Performance Reviews Secrets/Rumors/Gossip Time and Tenure-Based Comp Plans Convoluted Comp Plans Egos Running Amok Unhappy People People Behaving Badly Lack of Info/Closed Communication Unclear Direction Atmosphere of Fear Politics No Fun

When in doubt, select the opposite of these behaviors


Fourth Insight: When Overmatched, Use Judo

Turn all disadvantages into advantages Business Problem: I couldn’t work a standard fixed schedule

Judo Solution: Use a non-standard schedule to impress clients

Standard Work Week My Plan for Differentiation

21 work days/month 25 work days/month

8 work hours/day 12 work hours/day

168 total work hours/month 300 work hours/month

I had 132 extra work hours (40%) available to differentiate myself


Fourth Insight: When Overmatched, Use Judo

Turn all disadvantages into advantages Personal Problem: I couldn’t be with Kelly every day

Judo Solution: Use distance to make bigger impacts

Standard Parenting Week My Plan for Differentiation

30 parent days/month 4 parenting days/month

1-2 quality hours/day 14 quality hours/day

60 one-on-one hours/month 56 one-on-one hours/month

Everything is routine 3-4 hours of phone time/mo

4-6 letters per month

Original songs

Power of the unexpected

Every second is ‘just for Kelly’

Nothing will be routine


Judo Everywhere

Business Problem: Had no start-up capital for offices Judo Solution: Create one of the first truly virtual companies

Patenting Problem: I couldn’t help with day-to-day homework… Judo Solution: Implement an irresistible reward system that

provided virtual focus and motivation

Business Problem: I had no clients and no business track record Judo Solution: Offer 100% guarantee—no one else had this!

Parenting Problem: I couldn’t be there for most school events Judo Solution: Surgically show up to make huge impact


Fifth Insight: Communication is Everything

If you don’t talk to me, you don’t exist Face time matters—you can’t phone-in or email-out the love

Parental Communication Business Communication

Have regular, frequent, meaningful communication

Create memories, not just experiences

Stories are powerful Showing beats telling, but telling

doesn’t hurt Make all communications count End all interactions with ‘I love

you’ The difficulty of talking about

something with a child is directly proportional to the importance of having the discussion

Have regular, frequent, and meaningful communications

Create memorable outcomes, don’t just do the work

Stories are powerful Demonstrate your competence

rather than telling it Plan all non-routine

communications with clients End all conversations with ‘thank

you for trusting me with this assignment’

The more you are dreading a conversation, the more important it is to have it


How Do You Measure Success?

Parental Success Measures Business Success Measures Your ex complains that you spend

more time with Kelly than she can You know all your kids friends and

they want to hang out with you The principal and teachers all know

you on sight When she’s about 17, your child

realizes that you are goofy and irrelevant, just as if she lived with you full time

70% of your staff has been with you for more than 5 years; 50% over 10 years

70% of your current clients have been with you more than 5 years; 50% over 10 years

72 consecutive profitable quarters Have created jobs that over 100

people have held, providing over $60,000,000 in income for their families

My team thinks I’m goofy and irrelevant


Final Thought--Aim for Integration, not “Balance”

Integration is a more useful model than Balance— think of life as a complex system with many disparate processes that require seamless integration

Great solutions are like great performances—they look easy because someone spent lots of time out of balance first to create them

You earn the right to be in balance by working hard to create an integrated life—balance is the payoff for out-of-balance efforts

When this is done right, it is joyful


Thanks for your time and attention

I hope this discussion was helpful